Thousands Of Elves Jobless As Santa Moves

Posted in the Indianapolis Forum

Since: Dec 06

Indianapolis

#1 Nov 25, 2012
North Pole - With only 30 days left before Christmas, hundreds of elves at the North Pole received their lay-off notices announcing a bold move by Santa to move his entire toy production to mainland China in 2011. The news comes as a shock to the hundreds of jovial little elves that have slaved for hundreds of years for the North Pole's largest employer, and are in the process of dealing with the sad news of looming

Santa's production of toys at the North Pole has faced recent financial difficulties over the last three hundred years, after making and distributing millions of toys free of charge which has resulted in a $987 trillion debt for Santa. Also blamed is the lack of demand for the finely crafted wooden toys the elves were producing, with many children demanding newer video game systems and advanced electronics which the elves are unable to produce.

The toy production will move to Xing Chung Province in earlier 2013 and most elves will see their North Pole toy factory shut down in March of 2013, sending thousands of elves to the unemployment line. "I think a lot of us will find work in the entertainment industry, but we are saddened Santa has not given us a choice to work with the Chinese on making toys for kids around the world." Jangle remarked. Santa Claus was unavailable for comment but is still expected to make delivery of the toys this Christmas Eve.
Smell

Indianapolis, IN

#2 Nov 25, 2012
Smell my finger!!!

Since: Dec 06

Indianapolis

#3 Nov 25, 2012
Where has that finger been? Up some man?
Smell wrote:
Smell my finger!!!
ok

Indianapolis, IN

#4 Nov 25, 2012
DavidM wrote:
North Pole - With only 30 days left before Christmas, hundreds of elves at the North Pole received their lay-off notices announcing a bold move by Santa to move his entire toy production to mainland China in 2011. The news comes as a shock to the hundreds of jovial little elves that have slaved for hundreds of years for the North Pole's largest employer, and are in the process of dealing with the sad news of looming

Santa's production of toys at the North Pole has faced recent financial difficulties over the last three hundred years, after making and distributing millions of toys free of charge which has resulted in a $987 trillion debt for Santa. Also blamed is the lack of demand for the finely crafted wooden toys the elves were producing, with many children demanding newer video game systems and advanced electronics which the elves are unable to produce.

The toy production will move to Xing Chung Province in earlier 2013 and most elves will see their North Pole toy factory shut down in March of 2013, sending thousands of elves to the unemployment line. "I think a lot of us will find work in the entertainment industry, but we are saddened Santa has not given us a choice to work with the Chinese on making toys for kids around the world." Jangle remarked. Santa Claus was unavailable for comment but is still expected to make delivery of the toys this Christmas Eve.
Santa isn't real

Since: Dec 06

Indianapolis

#5 Nov 25, 2012
No but China is. They put out cheap products by cheap labor and we buy it by the truck loads. Besides, we owe them over a trillion dollars.
ok wrote:
<quoted text>
Santa isn't real
Carl Sweeney

Indianapolis, IN

#6 Nov 25, 2012
DavidM wrote:
<quoted text>No but China is. They put out cheap products by cheap labor and we buy it by the truck loads. Besides, we owe them over a trillion dollars.
And your point is...
what

Terre Haute, IN

#7 Nov 25, 2012
DavidM wrote:
North Pole - With only 30 days left before Christmas, hundreds of elves at the North Pole received their lay-off notices announcing a bold move by Santa to move his entire toy production to mainland China in 2011. The news comes as a shock to the hundreds of jovial little elves that have slaved for hundreds of years for the North Pole's largest employer, and are in the process of dealing with the sad news of looming
Santa's production of toys at the North Pole has faced recent financial difficulties over the last three hundred years, after making and distributing millions of toys free of charge which has resulted in a $987 trillion debt for Santa. Also blamed is the lack of demand for the finely crafted wooden toys the elves were producing, with many children demanding newer video game systems and advanced electronics which the elves are unable to produce.
The toy production will move to Xing Chung Province in earlier 2013 and most elves will see their North Pole toy factory shut down in March of 2013, sending thousands of elves to the unemployment line. "I think a lot of us will find work in the entertainment industry, but we are saddened Santa has not given us a choice to work with the Chinese on making toys for kids around the world." Jangle remarked. Santa Claus was unavailable for comment but is still expected to make delivery of the toys this Christmas Eve.
all about union greed and disconnect
Important note

Terre Haute, IN

#8 Nov 25, 2012
DavidM wrote:
North Pole - With only 30 days left before Christmas, hundreds of elves at the North Pole received their lay-off notices announcing a bold move by Santa to move his entire toy production to mainland China in 2011. The news comes as a shock to the hundreds of jovial little elves that have slaved for hundreds of years for the North Pole's largest employer, and are in the process of dealing with the sad news of looming
Santa's production of toys at the North Pole has faced recent financial difficulties over the last three hundred years, after making and distributing millions of toys free of charge which has resulted in a $987 trillion debt for Santa. Also blamed is the lack of demand for the finely crafted wooden toys the elves were producing, with many children demanding newer video game systems and advanced electronics which the elves are unable to produce.
The toy production will move to Xing Chung Province in earlier 2013 and most elves will see their North Pole toy factory shut down in March of 2013, sending thousands of elves to the unemployment line. "I think a lot of us will find work in the entertainment industry, but we are saddened Santa has not given us a choice to work with the Chinese on making toys for kids around the world." Jangle remarked. Santa Claus was unavailable for comment but is still expected to make delivery of the toys this Christmas Eve.
THIS IS WHAT REALLY HAPPNED TO SANTA
And here’s what you won't hear the unions ever talk about:

--Hostess paid out almost $100 million in health benefits for retirees last year, but over half of it covered workers who never had worked at Hostess. The Teamsters’ onerous and antiquated “multi-employer pension plan” foists the pension obligations of a bankrupt company on to the balance sheets of surviving rivals—ensuring a steady death spiral in any declining industry. A similar “MEPP” almost killed YRC, one of the largest trucking companies.

--Union rules forced Hostess to run separate truck fleets for delivering bread vs. sweets. A sweets driver, serving a 7-11 store, was forbidden from restocking shelves with breads already delivered and waiting in the back—he had to call for a bread driver to swing by and handle.

--The union restrictions on the 5,500 distribution routes at Hostess made it unprofitable to serve tiny outlets, yet Hostess was barred from using smaller, sleeker—and non-union—distributors.

--Workers were asked to take an 8% pay cut and pay 17% of their health-care costs instead of zero. Welcome to the club, guys. For this, they would have received 25% ownership of Hostess plus $100 million of Hostess debt to be paid back to the unions.

But the bakers wouldn’t budge.

In the months ahead a chop-shop or food giant may resurrect various Hostess brands, but those 36 plants are shuttered, those 18,500 jobs are gone for good. The union preferred to picket while an 85-year-old company suffocated ... rather than risk having to face inevitable demands for similar concessions at other employers across the country.

Those demands will be forthcoming, anyway, because, as President Obama likes to say in slapping the rich with higher taxes, the math doesn’t work. The only questions are which union will be next, and whether anyone reasonable (or sane) will be listening.

Even a parasite is smart enough to know not to kill its host. In the case of unions, the presence of such preternatural intelligence isn’t yet readily apparent.

Since: Dec 06

Indianapolis

#9 Nov 25, 2012
Yes they belong to local 1225
what wrote:
<quoted text>
all about union greed and disconnect
Important note

Terre Haute, IN

#10 Nov 25, 2012
HERE IS WHAT IT SHOULD HAVE SAID
Santa paid out almost $100 million in health benefits for retirees last year, but over half of it covered workers who never had worked at the North Pole. The Elves’ onerous and antiquated “multi-employer pension plan” foists the pension obligations of a bankrupt company on to the balance sheets of surviving rivals—ensuring a steady death spiral in any declining industry. A similar “MEPP” almost killed YRC, one of the largest Reindeer companies.

--Union rules forced Santa to run separate Reindeer fleets for delivering Toys vs. electronics. A electronics driver, serving a home , was forbidden from gifting trees with toys already delivered and waiting in the back—he had to call for a toy driver to swing by and handle.

--The Elves restrictions on the 5,500 distribution routes at the North Pole made it unprofitable to serve tiny outlets, yet Santa was barred from using smaller, sleeker—and non-Elf—distributors.

--Workers were asked to take an 8% pay cut and pay 17% of their health-care costs instead of zero. Welcome to the club, guys. For this, they would have received 25% ownership of the North Pole plus $100 million of North Pole debt to be paid back to the Elves.

But the Elves wouldn't budge.

In the months ahead a chop-shop or Toy giant may resurrect various Santa brands, but those 36 plants are shuttered, those 18,500 jobs are gone for good. The Elves preferred to picket while an 2000-year-old company suffocated ... rather than risk having to face inevitable demands for similar concessions at other employers across the country.

Those demands will be forthcoming, anyway, because, as President Obama likes to say in slapping the rich with higher taxes, the math doesn't work. The only questions are which Elves will be next, and whether anyone reasonable (or sane) will be listening.

Even a parasite is smart enough to know not to kill its host. In the case of Elves, the presence of such preternatural intelligence isn't yet readily apparent.
Aromatic Static

Jersey Shore, PA

#11 Nov 25, 2012
DavidM wrote:
Where has that finger been? Up some man?
<quoted text>


Why did you smell it?

Did you have to?

Did you have to smell that finger?

Did it linger?

Did you let it linger?

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