Husband sacrifices sex to stay alive prostate cancer

Tim MaddeverM has made a trade no man would wish to contemplate. Prompt prostate cancer surgery this year means in all likelihood he will see his teenage children grow to adulthood; but for that privilege he has swapped a happy, spontaneous sex life, and the loss has been harrowing.

[Pamela in red]

Wow, that's pretty young to have to go through that. Choices are not always easy in life.

[seymour]

First thing: he's had his kids.

I would gladly trade impotence for a high probability of living another 25-35 years.

As for the decline and fall of the sex life of his Mrs, there is silence. Why? In any event, they can still exchange oral.

I have chronic high PSA levels, and have undergone several biopsies. One resulted in an infection that required 24 hours in hospital to treat.

Female cancers are worse. If caught in time, prostate cancer is definitely less traumatic than breast cancer. Ovarian cancer is hard to detect and has an astonishing fatality rate.

[jefferson]

Pamela in red wrote:

Wow, that's pretty young to have to go through that. Choices are not always easy in life.

hi may i knw u girl in red would like to talk to u anyway to contact u miss

[Pamela in red]

seymour wrote:

First thing: he's had his kids.
I would gladly trade impotence for a high probability of living another 25-35 years.
As for the decline and fall of the sex life of his Mrs, there is silence. Why? In any event, they can still exchange oral.
I have chronic high PSA levels, and have undergone several biopsies. One resulted in an infection that required 24 hours in hospital to treat.
Female cancers are worse. If caught in time, prostate cancer is definitely less traumatic than breast cancer. Ovarian cancer is hard to detect and has an astonishing fatality rate.

No all men are willing or enjoy giving cunnilingus.

Yes, he is lucky in many respects but it is still tough to accept you have to give something up or that it will be a greater challenge in the future.

[some1666]

Pamela in red wrote:

<quoted text>
No all men are willing or enjoy giving cunnilingus.
Yes, he is lucky in many respects but it is still tough to accept you have to give something up or that it will be a greater challenge in the future.

girl in red plz add me on msn [e-mail]

[seymour]

Pamela in red wrote:

<quoted text>
No all men are willing or enjoy giving cunnilingus.
Yes, he is lucky in many respects but it is still tough to accept you have to give something up or that it will be a greater challenge in the future.

The article did not mention the worst part of prostate cancer surgery: permanent or chronic incontinence.

If I had a damaged capacity for erection, I would much prefer doing cunnilingus to doing nothing and having to endure an irritable spouse, and feeling sorry for myself.

Prostate cancer is not truly embarrassing or degrading for us men.

Down here in New Zealand, a few women who have undergone mastectomies have posed topless for B&W photos. Most who do this have serene faces. Still, it can be very distressing for women to engage in intercourse while having scar tissue where one or both breasts should be.

I also believe that the advanced countries are teetering on the brink of allowing adult women to go topless wherever a bikini is socially appropriate today. Women don't like to be hemmed in simply by the fact that some men perve at them. While topless may give a lot of women a sense of freedom and power, it will make many post-mastectomy women even more embarrassed.

[Pamela in red]

seymour wrote:

<quoted text>
The article did not mention the worst part of prostate cancer surgery: permanent or chronic incontinence.
If I had a damaged capacity for erection, I would much prefer doing cunnilingus to doing nothing and having to endure an irritable spouse, and feeling sorry for myself.
Prostate cancer is not truly embarrassing or degrading for us men.
Down here in New Zealand, a few women who have undergone mastectomies have posed topless for B&W photos. Most who do this have serene faces. Still, it can be very distressing for women to engage in intercourse while having scar tissue where one or both breasts should be.
I also believe that the advanced countries are teetering on the brink of allowing adult women to go topless wherever a bikini is socially appropriate today. Women don't like to be hemmed in simply by the fact that some men perve at them. While topless may give a lot of women a sense of freedom and power, it will make many post-mastectomy women even more embarrassed.

You are right in that there are other ways to enjoy each other without an erect penis. People just have to be open to trying something different other than what they are used to.

If he isn't okay with oral sex he can use a vibrator or try some new things to keep their lovemaking going.

I didn't know about the incontinence issue. There are disposable underwear that takes care of that.

[seymour]

Pamela in red wrote:

<quoted text>
I didn't know about the incontinence issue.

A few months back, I had an extensive discussion about this topic in another forum. The guy told me that serious continence difficulties are a major drawback of prostate cancer surgery, one that urologists are reluctant to 'fess up to beforehand.

[Pamela in red]

seymour wrote:

<quoted text>
A few months back, I had an extensive discussion about this topic in another forum. The guy told me that serious continence difficulties are a major drawback of prostate cancer surgery, one that urologists are reluctant to 'fess up to beforehand.

It's one of those things you don't really have a choice about. You do it to survive.

[Susan]

I know this guy that that helped me get over ovarian cancer.

http://www.new-holistic-medicine.com/what-cau...

[love to watch]

hmmmm, i'd like to watch my wife getting thourghly pleasured again. my wife and i had such great sex before i was diagnosed with postate cancer. we were very sexy, erotic and adventurous, we did so much fooling around it was like christmas every day. i enjpyed showing her off and she loved to be shown off. we have had sex about every place you can think of, in the car, on the beach, hot tub, pool, parks, motels with the lights on and drapes open, you name it and we've done it. she does not care who sees what. she is 130#, 5-7in, 36dd, brunette and very trim and quite desirable.
however since my surgery, which was supposed to be nerve sparing so i could still have a hard on, i have been unable to get an erection. so now all i can do is suck her dark nipples, finger her pussy and eat her which leaves her AND me very unsatisfied.
recently i have asked her if she would like to be f*cked again and she says yes she would and i really don't mind if she does. i enjoyed watching her beautiful titties bounce up and down with each stroke she took and watch her tight pussy lips grasp my dick as it went in and out, then watch her arch her back and moan as she came with me. i always thought she looked so lovely naked, legs spred and eyes glued on the c*ck that was comming to her wet twat. so, i have been talking to her about having someone pleasure her while i watched, so far i have gotten her to admit she would sure like the feeling of a big dick inside her and squirting huge loads into her box. but she has not told me when or who it might be. she has said that she does want to fulfill one of our fantacies thro, that is for she and i to do 69 while she is screwed from behind while i lay underneath of her and lick her clit. we have talked of this and both of us think it would be VERY erotic, so i told her any time any place.
who knows maybe tommorow she will tell me she is ready to find a guy and let me watch her suck him off and get him to strip her naked while she undoes his clothes and lays her beautiful naked body back, spreds her legs and welcomes a big dick into her warm body....i cannot let her desires go unsatisfied much longer. she really needs release and i want her to have it. i wwould lkie to see her let loose all her inehibitions and do whatever she wants. i love her and will always do what she wants, she always liked for me to let her set on my face after we had sex and suck her till she actually faints, i'd willingly do that again as many times as she wants cause i think she is so beautiful when she is sexy and wonten.

[Smitty]

Pamela in red wrote:

<quoted text>
No all men are willing or enjoy giving cunnilingus.
Yes, he is lucky in many respects but it is still tough to accept you have to give something up or that it will be a greater challenge in the future.

I find it hard to believe that any straight male finds performing oral sex for a clean, attractive woman distasteful. The taste and aroma of a beautiful woman's honeypie are capitivating. The thrill of her lovingly playing with your ears and hair and telling you how wonderful you are as you worship her with a trip "Down South" are exciting and gratifying. Finally, the moment when spasms of pleasure rock her body and she pushes her sweet honeypie to your eager mouth for you to drink her offering of sweet, warm honey as your reward for your act of worship is a wonderful finishing touch to both of your 15-30 minutes of pleasure.

[Fredi]

Anyone has the right to decide for the best (although we do not know for sure what the best is). Hope this guy will enjoy his commitments. When married, wife and husband should have a good understanding and would thing that the worst will happen, but at least they are together; no matter how many sacrifices they should made.

[STEPHMAR]

Men who show a risk of prostate cancer,should begin to add estrogen.I have said this before;but I guess men are so "macho"that they would rather undergo useless surgery.ALSO,how many times have I said that "Breast Cancer"can be prevented by SIMPLE BREAST MASSAGE.I guess the girls are not listening either?

[Smitty]

Pamela in red wrote:

<quoted text>
No all men are willing or enjoy giving cunnilingus.
Yes, he is lucky in many respects but it is still tough to accept you have to give something up or that it will be a greater challenge in the future.

What heterosexual man doesn't enjoy performing cunnilingus? If a man doesn't love a beautiful woman's clean, sweet womanhood melting in his mouth, I'd question his manhood. I recently had a radical prostatectomy and am temporarily (according to my surgeon) unable to achieve an erection. Cunnilingus has been more than foreplay in my wife's and my sex life for over 30 years. Now, it's in the center ring of the circus, and I still love the moment when her tummy convulses, she pulls my face to her womanhood, and she melts for me like strawberry ice cream. Sure, I miss intercourse after she has her happy endings, but I'm still happy to worship her in our bedroom 2-3 times a week.

[just me alone]

Smitty wrote:

<quoted text>
What heterosexual man doesn't enjoy performing cunnilingus? If a man doesn't love a beautiful woman's clean, sweet womanhood melting in his mouth, I'd question his manhood. I recently had a radical prostatectomy and am temporarily (according to my surgeon) unable to achieve an erection. Cunnilingus has been more than foreplay in my wife's and my sex life for over 30 years. Now, it's in the center ring of the circus, and I still love the moment when her tummy convulses, she pulls my face to her womanhood, and she melts for me like strawberry ice cream. Sure, I miss intercourse after she has her happy endings, but I'm still happy to worship her in our bedroom 2-3 times a week.

How old are and when did you have the surgery? My husband had surgery last December.

[Smitty]

just me alone wrote:

<quoted text>
How old are and when did you have the surgery? My husband had surgery last December.

I'm 64 and my wife is 52. I had the surgery at the end of March this year, basically 4 weeks ago. We have always enjoyed cunnilingus for 15-30 minutes until she had a happy ending or two and until I got to savor all of her sweet warm honey for the 32 years we've been married. Then, we have enjoyed intercourse for my orgasm(s) after she has enjoyed an O or two. My surgeon states that my erections will come back in time, and he'll prescribe Viagra or Cialis at my 6-week check-up for a temporary fix. Until then, it's cunnilingus followed by cuddling instead of intercourse. As long as her honey is warm and sweet and she fondles my ears well as I worship her Down South, that will do just fine.

[just me alone]

Smitty wrote:

<quoted text>
I'm 64 and my wife is 52. I had the surgery at the end of March this year, basically 4 weeks ago. We have always enjoyed cunnilingus for 15-30 minutes until she had a happy ending or two and until I got to savor all of her sweet warm honey for the 32 years we've been married. Then, we have enjoyed intercourse for my orgasm(s) after she has enjoyed an O or two. My surgeon states that my erections will come back in time, and he'll prescribe Viagra or Cialis at my 6-week check-up for a temporary fix. Until then, it's cunnilingus followed by cuddling instead of intercourse. As long as her honey is warm and sweet and she fondles my ears well as I worship her Down South, that will do just fine.

My husband was almost 51 when he had surgery. You might find the thread about sex after prostate surgery helpful. Here is the link.

http://www.topix.com/forum/news/sex/TMP3JJV7G...

I posted under Beach lover at that time. I tell about our situation in that thread. I hope all goes well for you, just have patience.

[Lynn j]

My husband had prostate cancer in his mid 50's and though we still love each other after 18 months or so of unsuccessful attempts at sex we have given up. I the wife in her 40's have gained weight, lost any feeling of being a sexy woman i know its not his fault but we are both frustrated and our relationship feels more like a brother sister relationship. We have tried all but two aids pumps & pills dont work nor do the suppositories that are inserted unto the penis. Im so thankful that my husbands life was saved but a big part of our marriage died.

[Brando]

Hey Guys...I am contemplating a laser prostatectomy proceedure to get the urine flow back. Have you had this op. and did it effect the sex life?