Too much porn = total lost of sex drive?
Showem

United States

#201 Apr 16, 2010
I have some horrible combination of ED, performance anxiety and low sex drive and I'm only in my early 30's. I'm battling a slight addiction to masturbation and internet porn. To top all that off I drink a lot of alcohol some weeks. I just started dating a new woman like 2 weeks ago, we haven't been intimate yet and I'm totally freaking out about it. I'm a total mess.
Nuts

Brooklyn, NY

#203 Apr 18, 2010
To all the women having problems with their fellows - Just show them this site or
another "porn leads to erectile dysfunction" site to help them realize the depth of their choice. If my ex-gf would have shown me something like this, it would have certainly opened my eyes.
christina

El Paso, TX

#204 Apr 19, 2010
pray and ask god to deliver you in the name of jesus.and ask him to please help you get your sex drive back.but remember,god wants you to be married before having sex
technoman

Casablanca, Morocco

#206 Apr 23, 2010
first of all you must know that alcohol destroys nearlly 20% of hormone testosterone.
watching porn kills libido totally (people who claim the oppposite are devils)
masturbation is too harmful to your sexual health (or health in general)
stop all of this and start exercising sport on a regualar basis, eat very well (all kinds of vitamin B, Zinc,phosphore, Vitamine A, oxyde nitrique...), sleep enough.
don't try to have sex for the moment because that can result in a total disppointement, which will make you suffer psychologically....
your body needs at least 4 months of serious treatement to recuperate and recover....pray God...
jimmy

Los Angeles, CA

#207 Apr 24, 2010
so masturbating three times a day is a bit much?
had2moveon

Broomfield, CO

#208 Apr 29, 2010
I had been with a man for nearly 6 years, to be honest the sex was never quite there.... He would 90% of the time loose his errection or just have no interest at all! This was very difficult for me because we were so perfect in every other aspect of our relationship. I was VERY insecure & never felt attractive. I came to discover he had a porn addiction. It honestly does exist & it honestly can kill any chance for a "normal" sexual relationship. I confronted him MANY times on the issue & he would lie & become very angry & defensive. I know he loved me & says he still wants me back.... It is very sad & we have BOTH lost SO much. I highly advise anyone reading this to seek help!!! Be honest & true to yourself & partner if you really care at all. & good luck because I'm sure it is a very difficult habit to break.... Or else I would probably NOT be writing this right now & loosing so much that WE BOTH worked so hard to for. I feel I'm a VERY strong, understanding woman and even I could not help with this addiction.
Chris Smith

London, UK

#209 Apr 30, 2010
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sexless in chicago

Berwyn, IL

#210 May 5, 2010
flight wrote:
All of you are absolutly right about porn, it will negatively affect your sex drive. Ive been married for 20 years now and have occasional battles with pornagraphy. when Im abusing it, I have problems getting it up and maintaining and erection when Im with my wife. When Im not abusing it I have no problems giving my wife the ride of here life. My advice to all of us is to ditch the pornagraphy and work hard on strengthening the real relationships in our lives!
I'm 12 years younger than my 44 year old boyfriend, his excuse is it's easier to masturbate than the effort he has to have sex with me. Is that lame or what? I'm in my dirty 30's and not really enjoying it at all. Wish my boyfriend of 5 years would give me the ride of my life even if it's only once a week.
sexless in chicago

Berwyn, IL

#211 May 5, 2010
I'm 12 years younger than my 44 year old boyfriend, his excuse is it's easier to masturbate than the effort he has to have sex with me. Is that lame or what? I'm in my dirty 30's and not really enjoying it at all. Wish my boyfriend of 5 years would give me the ride of my life even if it's only once a week. I'm very sexual when we have sex but angry when I come home and see porn loaded on the computer from him jacking off all day.
habitual porn watcher

Tacoma, WA

#213 May 10, 2010
great discussions. I hope I can decrease my intake of porn by a lot. I currently masturbate every night before i fall asleep, i can't fall asleep without porn..:(
Will recover 110percent

Glen Allen, VA

#214 May 13, 2010
Ok dudes, I'm in my early 30s and sad to say I'm in the same boat as a lot of you. Had I known six months ago what i know now I wouldn't be in this boat with you but that's life. I broke up with my girl about 7 months ago and during the time we were together I was a 100% champ and never had any issues in bed. In fact my girlfriend used to complain about my prowress.

I looked at porn while we were together but not that often because she hated it so I always had to hide. So I might have looked at porn 3-4 times per week at the most. However shortly after we broke up I turned to good old reliable porn because I thought if I didn't keep wanking I would lose my potency. I actually thought I was doing myself a favor. After doing this frequently several times per day for months I noticed changes in my sperm, it became more watery and my nuts actually felt tired and drained. I had to resort to more and more extreme/nasty porn to get excited. Bad bad bad!

Fast forward 6 months and I finally get a hot babe in bed who is ready to hop aboard and do her business. Suddenly I notice my brain and penis weren't on the same team. My brain refused to recognize a hot naked female chick as something that should turn me on. Only porn women doing insane sexual acts that I'll never have the luxury of doing did the job. I could get an errection but it was weak and didn't last. Wow that was embarassing. I found this forum and am glad to hear it's because of porn and I have developed a plan to fix this problem for good.

Here is my plan:
1. Cancel porn account and never watch it again. NOT worth it.
2. Eat foods daily that aid in boosting male sex drive. Bananas, almonds, pumpkin seads, fig newtons, rare meats, ect.
3. Excersize: I will run 3 miles a day roughly 3 days a week and play sports.(I'm already athletic)
4. Only beat off using imagination and no more than one time per day to real women.(your mom)

I'm a very diciplined guy and will have no trouble doing this. I will not stray from the path. I'll let you know how it goes. Right now I'm on day 2 and already feeling a little better.

Best of luck to you guys, it sucks to be in this spot but we can all recover. I won't forget this place.

Later!
Will recover 110percent

Glen Allen, VA

#216 May 15, 2010
I've added Garlic pills and asparagus to my diet. I think it's working. I'm starting to feel normal again already in less than 1 week. I've stuck to my plan. I haven't had sex yet but I'll let you know how it goes when I do.
fckporn

Yonkers, NY

#217 May 16, 2010
guys this is not uncommon, more and more men are realizing something is wrong and people are starting to connect the dots.

check out this site, it goes pretty in depth about it and the writer of the blog is very helpful and answers back questions if you leave comments.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-po...
Out-of-control porn

Warrenton, VA

#219 Jun 21, 2010
I am dying to know how everything turned out man? I hope that you didn't fall off the wagon. I totally relate with what you say and I think your system to return back to a healthy sex life rather than an unnatural obsession with porn is brilliant! I use to love watching porn until one day not only did my "excitement" and curiosity reach an ugly point of no return, but I actually started to want to watch porn rather than have sex with my partner. That's insane. That's when I knew the porn was getting unhealthy.
Will recover 110percent wrote:
Ok dudes, I'm in my early 30s and sad to say I'm in the same boat as a lot of you. Had I known six months ago what i know now I wouldn't be in this boat with you but that's life. I broke up with my girl about 7 months ago and during the time we were together I was a 100% champ and never had any issues in bed. In fact my girlfriend used to complain about my prowress.
I looked at porn while we were together but not that often because she hated it so I always had to hide. So I might have looked at porn 3-4 times per week at the most. However shortly after we broke up I turned to good old reliable porn because I thought if I didn't keep wanking I would lose my potency. I actually thought I was doing myself a favor. After doing this frequently several times per day for months I noticed changes in my sperm, it became more watery and my nuts actually felt tired and drained. I had to resort to more and more extreme/nasty porn to get excited. Bad bad bad!
Fast forward 6 months and I finally get a hot babe in bed who is ready to hop aboard and do her business. Suddenly I notice my brain and penis weren't on the same team. My brain refused to recognize a hot naked female chick as something that should turn me on. Only porn women doing insane sexual acts that I'll never have the luxury of doing did the job. I could get an errection but it was weak and didn't last. Wow that was embarassing. I found this forum and am glad to hear it's because of porn and I have developed a plan to fix this problem for good.
Here is my plan:
1. Cancel porn account and never watch it again. NOT worth it.
2. Eat foods daily that aid in boosting male sex drive. Bananas, almonds, pumpkin seads, fig newtons, rare meats, ect.
3. Excersize: I will run 3 miles a day roughly 3 days a week and play sports.(I'm already athletic)
4. Only beat off using imagination and no more than one time per day to real women.(your mom)
I'm a very diciplined guy and will have no trouble doing this. I will not stray from the path. I'll let you know how it goes. Right now I'm on day 2 and already feeling a little better.
Best of luck to you guys, it sucks to be in this spot but we can all recover. I won't forget this place.
Later!
Will recover 110percent

Glen Allen, VA

#220 Jun 21, 2010
Thanks for your concern. I did a really good job sticking to my plan and I'd actually I'm 110 percent back to normal now. The extra 10% comes from the fact that for some reason I have a lot more stamina in bed now. The hardest part about recovery was being caught in "no mans land" for about 3-4 weeks where nothing excited me. Then all of a sudden my brain reset itself and I'm getting arroused by simple things again like a woman with a short skirt or partially exposed cleavage. There was some anxiety/neverousness to deal with afterwards that took a few weeks to get over. That is like part II of the problem. I was just patient with that and have an understanding girlfriend so it worked itself out in the end. Thank god the nightmare is now over.
bgirl

Southlake, TX

#221 Jun 23, 2010
I have enjoyed reading the posts in this thread. I will try to keep my story short but like most of your stories, it is complicated. I am a 41 year old woman and my boyfriend and I are very much in love. In fact we were very much in love as teens, married other people, fell out of touch, and reconnected a year ago. He is the love of my life and I know he feels the same. He has had some ED problems the past 8 months since we became sexually intimate (actually before me even) and it isn't a big deal to me. He takes Viagra on occasion, but mostly we try to enjoy each other without it. There is a lot of love here, folks.
Well, I knew he watched porn on occasion. We were open about it. I don't like it, but we have never fought about it. I was sexually abused as a child and struggle sometimes with fear during intimacy (very long story) but he is supportive. Of course this colors things for me. The porn makes me uncomfortable, but I have not made it a big deal before now. That is because recently my impression has changed and I think that he views porn a lot more than I realized and in my mind I think, Ok he can get hard for strange women but not for me....so my mind has gone there. Still---we don't fight about it. He is pretty in tune to me and sensed my discomfort so offered to give up porn. It was his idea and it never occurred to me to ask. Well, I have discovered that he has NOT given it up. He got rid of his DVD's but is still watching on the internet. I am not sure I know how I feel, but I know it is not good. I haven't said anything and do not know what to say exactly, but after reading this post today I realize what we are going through must be very common. I do love this man and want a life with him. But I want an honest life. Any suggestions or support would be great. Thanks and blessings to all of you who are struggling on both sides of this dilemma.
speakingfromexpe rience

Glen Allen, VA

#222 Jun 23, 2010
Bgirl, tell him that watching porn can lead to ED. From reading these posts you now know that this is true. What's more important to a man than his manhood? Also offer more real sex if he gives it up. That always helps too.
feelin better

Tallahassee, FL

#224 Jun 29, 2010
Im only 23, eat healthy, exercise regularly, and not to sound conceited but I look good. I have no problems being social with women but when it comes time for sex i have in inability to obtain/maintain an erection. I also have a low sex drive. I have to pop sex pills about an hour before a "sexual encounter" and you obviously cant predict all encounters which makes this really inconvenient.

I've tried everything, I went to the doctor - my T levels are normal, blood pressure is fine - he said it might be psychological which is not the answer I wanted. The only time i have no problem getting an erection is when i look at porn. I've been masturbating to porn regularly (4-5x a week at least?) since I was 12 years old and when I stumbled across this site I connected the dots.

I mean it makes sense, I'm so used to watching these porn fantasies that when it comes to REAL sex my little man wont perform. It's like I conditioned myself to only be aroused by jacking off and watching videos. I also noticed that over the years my erections (even with watching porn) are become less rigid and Im starting to become desensitized with "normal" porn and have to view stuff thats more "hardcore". This is all embarrassing but at the same time it feels good to get it off my chest and know I'm not alone. I am officially DONE with porn, I wish I would have read all this a long time ago. Hopefully I can fully recover... Btw please keep sharing your success stories its encouraging

What do you all think about having a site/forum/online community solely dedicated to this issue? People could post their personal stories, if and how they recovered, what they did, related articles - and just overall raise awareness and help others in the same situation. I am a professional web developer and I could build one in no time
Hopeful girlfriend

Delray Beach, FL

#225 Jul 5, 2010
I've only been with my current bf for 3 months and already having issues that that department. The first time, I didn't mind and was very supportive, then the 2nd and third time got slightly discouraged. I then found out about his porn habit, which he was very honest and open about and I respect that completely, but it still bothered me to no end. We had a long argument about it, and I didn't want to be the control freak to tell him 'You can no longer watch porn' but he decided to stop masturbating and watching porn (I also know he was single for about 2 years before me.) It's only been a few days, and I don't really know how it's coming along as we haven't really mentioned it since..I want to refer him to this site, but it seems like such a sensitive topic to bring up, I don't know how to do it. :(
Jdrone

United States

#228 Jul 12, 2010
I was in the sane boat as many of the people posting here. Suffering from ED, not feeling excited by porn anymore and wondering if I had 'overdone' it.

Recently I discovered it was nothing like that at all, it had everything to do with diet. What kicked the realization off was reading online that up to 75% of diabetic men suffer from ED and loss of sensitivity. I am not diabetic, and in relatively good shape, but I have noticed that when I indulge myself and eat/drink too much junk food with refined sugar, and HFCS (high fructose corn syrup), it tends to affect my body in small ways - little aches, tendonitis, trouble sleeping, sluggishness. But I accepted this for the short term pleasure hit I guess. Over time, it's one of those things where the body needs more and more intake for the same effect (some have described white sugar as a drug more potent than heroin for example, but I don't know if I'd go that far), and I realized I had become accustomed to drinking a couple sodas a day, cookies and ice cream after work etc...

Anyway, to get to the point, I went cold turkey for a couple days eliminating all processed/refined foods from my diet, drinking only water, eating just vegetables and lean meat, and some rice. The first night, I experienced withdrawal symptoms, in particular a large headache, but the next day it already felt like a numb haze had lifted from my body, the little aches were gone, and felt more sensitive everywhere. After two days, I felt that I was back to a normal again that I had forgotten was possible. Sensitivity back down there, and over the next few days it became apparent that ED was gone.

That's my experience. I just wanted to share because some of the posts I've found online have been helpful, but I haven't seen that many targeting diet. So before you try pills, psychiatrists, etc, I suggest going a day or two without sugar and refined stuff. Just water, and fast a bit eating plain rice/vegetables when hungry. It might just help, it did for me... Good luck!

A couple notes:
1) here is no need to follow this diet forever - a sugary treat here and there is fine, but the amount of refined sugar/foods sould be reduced from before (it shouldn't be a staple).

2) Before I cut out the sugar, I had tried Maca in pill form (a herb believed to help treat male impotence and erectile dysfunction), and it had no effect. After cutting out sugar, the effects of a couple pills were very noticeable. This jives with what I read about viagra not working on some diabetics. It's almost like a high blood sugar level acts as an internal anesthetic on a certain level.

3) Here are some books on diet and sugar, though I don't think the link to ED is very strongly discussed in any:
"The Paleo Diet", Loren Cordain
"Sugar Blues", William Duffy
"Suicide By Sugar", Nancy Appleton

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