do all bipolar relationships end in disaster?

[drew]

My wife is bipolar and we just resently seperated. She now says she no longer is in love with me and wants a divorce, after 5 yrs of being happy together. From this sight, all I see is negitive commects towards people that suffer from bipolar disorder. I love my wife very much and I want to try to work through this, no matter what it takes. So is there anyone out there that has had a desent relastionship with a bipolar person or do they all end in disaster?

[Kat]

I have known several people with the disorder and their relationships always end in disaster.

[dentec]

Unfortunately, if she wants the divorce it doesn't matter if she is Bipolar or not. I have been married and divorced three times. I now know having Bipolar Disorder was a contributing factor but a marriage takes two " for better or for worse " I think your on the right track, you want to save the marriage, but she has to want to save it too. I hope it works out for the best.

[dentec]

I forgot to answer your question,,, I don't think it is important how other relationships did,what you do or attempt to do is.I'm sure for every marriage that didn't work you can find one that did regardless of any illness involved.

[gaydj4u]

Over 90% of BIPOLAR relationships end within 2 years. Im surprised you lasted this long.

GOOGLE IT! "bipolar divorce rate"

[dentec]

As with any statistics there are exceptions. I am not a statistic !

[WiseGuy]

Bipolar Divorce .
Take a look the link:

http://www.lifeloveandbipolar.com/bipolar_dis...

[erica]

drew wrote:

My wife is bipolar and we just resently seperated. She now says she no longer is in love with me and wants a divorce, after 5 yrs of being happy together. From this sight, all I see is negitive commects towards people that suffer from bipolar disorder. I love my wife very much and I want to try to work through this, no matter what it takes. So is there anyone out there that has had a desent relastionship with a bipolar person or do they all end in disaster?

It doesn't have to end in divorce. However, being in a marriage when one is bipolar is more of a struggle and requires a lot of patience and understanding from the spouse. If u are willing to fight for ur marriage, make that clear. I have also questioned if i should end my marriage, it is the illness talking and may not be her true feelings. Is she on meds? is she seeking therapy? i encourage u to go to counseling as a couple. I commend u for not taking the first flight out. Good luck

[greg]

i have just gotten out of a very emotitional mentaly abusive almost 2 yr relationship with a bi-polar female. it started out good untill i feel for her then the stuff started. she would leave our apt and be gone for days without even a phone call. we got back and forth time and time again but i found this, it is impossible to have a relationship with b/p that is not taking meds. i have been put through hell and just made it. although i love her dearly there never was a relationship, two people werent getting something out of it, only one that was muliputive, decieveing, lieing about it all. so damaging to me. i am in theripy and on antidepressents to help me gain back my dignyity, self worth. i was used just used up. and thrown away when i would stand up for myself. so slow was this brain washing that i never saw it or saw the other stuff that i find has been happening behind my back. i can hardly show my face to my friends now she was so good in the begining but once you fall for them that is the time they start to bleed ya, so sorry it just hurts so much.

[gregmech26]

greg, that is EXACTLY what happened to me! WORD-FOR WORD! You are NOT alone my friend.

Read page 48 of this link:

http://www.topix.com/forum/health/bipolar-dis...

[REG]

DIDDO. IN THE BEGINING,AMAZING,THE BEST EVER.BUT FAMILY FUNCTIONS,FULL MOONS,THE WEEK BEFORE HER PERIOD,LOOK OUT. I WAS ALWAYS BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING,EVERYTHING WAS MY FAULT,ALWAYS. AS LONG AS HER NEEDS WERE MET,SHE WAS HAPPY,BUT GOD FORBID THINKING ABOUT ANYONE BUT HERSELF.LITTLE THINGS BLOWN MILES OUT OF PORPORTION,RESULTING IN RESENTMENT,ISOLATION,ABANDONME NT FOR DAYS ON END.THE MOOD SWINGS,THE RAGE.SO MANY NIGHTS RUINED OVER TRIVIAL BULLSHIT,SHE EVEN RAMMED MY TRUCK,SMASHING GLASSES IN TANTRUMS,JUST COMPLETELY SHUTTING DOWN.I THINK THE WORST WAS HER NARCISSTIC WAYS,THE PREMADONA SYNDROME.YET I STILL TRY TO WORK ON IT,ALTHOUGH SHE IS LOCKED IN STAUNCH DENIAL,AND UNTREATED.MY NERVES ARE SHOT FROM THE CONSTANT MINDF#CK,MY HAIR IS FALLING OUT RAPIDLY FROM THE STRESS,IT TOTALLY AFFECTS EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE....I THINK IT IS TIME TO MOVE ON,ALTHOUGH I LOVE HER WITH ALL MY HEART,I HAVE TO REGAIN MYSELF. IT IS PUSHING THE TWO YEAR MARK AND I CAN NOW CLEARLY SEE THE PATTERNS,BUT THEN SHE BOUNCES BACK LIKE SHE IS FORGIVING ME AND GIVING ME ANOTHER CHANCE???AND SO FAR ,I HAVE BOUGHT IT EVERYTIME....HOPING THAT THINGS WILL CHANGE OR GET BETTER,IT WONT AND IT DOESNT.THANKS FOR LETTING ME VENT,AND TO ALL THAT HAVE SHARED THEIR STORIES,AND THE B/P PEOPLE WHO HAVE COMMENTED AND SHARED THEIR VIEW,THANK YOU.I AM TRYING TO UNDERSTAND SOMETHING AND THIS BLOG HAS VERY EDUCATIONAL.

[dentec]

Holy Crap ! I've been Bipolar most of my life and I've never treated anybody as bad as listed here, I can say however that I've been treated very bad and taken advantage of because of the disorder. This sure paints an ugly picture of people who have Bipolar disorder, I can say without doubt that not all people who have Bipolar disorder act this way. Please don't stereotype people with this disorder because of your own bad experiences, that said without medication I can become quite miserable to be around but not to the point described above, and fortunately I have friend's that understand and help me if and when it happens.

[gregmech26]

REG wrote:

BUT THEN SHE BOUNCES BACK LIKE SHE IS FORGIVING ME AND GIVING ME ANOTHER CHANCE???

I can totally relate 110%

[REG]

DENTEC,THIS IS NOT AN ATTACK,THIS WAS ME VENTING ABOUT MY PERSONAL SITUATION,NOT GENERALIZING OR SAYING THAT ALL THAT SUFFER WITH B/P DO THIS. IF FACT,REREAD MY POST AGAIN,I THANKED YOU FOR YOUR INPUT.....ALL THE BEST.

[REG]

DOES ANYONE ELSE NOTICE THE MOOD SWINGS IN CONJUNCTION WITH THE PHASES OF THE MOON,SPECIFICALLY THE NEW MOON AND OF COURSE ,THE FULL MOON?

[dentec]

Anything relating to a Full Moon or New Moon is false, just Google it. Reg I didn't take it as an attack, but I've had many get the wrong idea about Bipolar Disorder after reading and or hearing about someone who acts as radical as the person you described, there are even popular songs out that paint people with Bipolar Disorder as extreme Psychopaths and it's not true for most people suffering from Bipolar Disorder, I just want people to know that's all.

[gaydj4u]

You speak for "most" bipolar people?

What makes you think the other 99% of first-hand bipolar accounts dont speak for "most"?

Ask any schol teacher who has a bipolar student i ntheir classroom what they REALLY think of bipolar disorder!

[dentec]

Well I have a degree in Psychology and more than twenty years first hand experience with Bipolar Disorder, and in my experience with others that have Bipolar Disorder most do not act that radical, that is what I base my statements on. I'm sure I could show research that would point that out, but that's what Google is for to find facts.I would like to see the research about students with Bipolar Disorder and see what it says, no offense intended but anyone can make a generalized statement about anything given just a few examples.

[REG]

WOW MAN,CLEARLY YOU HAVE NEVER HAVE MET MY GIRL...THANKS AGAIN FOR YOUR INPUT.I AM TRYING TO UNDERSTAND ...IS ALL...I HAVE QUESTIONS....AND LOOKING FOR ANSWERS....MAYBE THERE ARE OTHER FACTORS IN PLAY HERE...I DONT HAVE A DEGREE IN PSYCHOLOGY.I HAVE A PARTNER THAT HAS SEVERE MOOD SWINGS AND IS SO ALL OVER THE MAP THAT IT KILLS ME INSIDE...AND I AM TRYING TO GET EDUCATED....AND MOST TRAITS READ LIKE A BOOK.

[dentec]

REG, I don't claim to be an expert but I've been around. My X-wife has very radical mood swings and obviously has Bipolar Disorder but she does nothing about it, she can justify anything, she does things she knows are wrong and repeats bad behavior, "If it's good for her it's right" that's how she act's. I believe after a wile the person chooses to continue there behavior and they don't take responsibility for them self's and that's a whole other Disorder. I have very radical up swings , but I don't lie, cheat, steal, and I'm not aggressive, but I understand whats going on and I deal with it. I see people with Bipolar Disorder use it as an excuse to do what ever they feel is right for them regardless of anyone else, but the people who really have a handle on it don't do that and they don't go "Postal" they usually have a tougher time dealing with the down side " Major Depression" and let me tell you the Depression side sucks big time. If I can answer any questions for you please ask, If I don't know I will tell you I don't know or point you somewhere for an answer. Dennis,,,