bipolar;cheating spouses
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paul

AOL

#1 Mar 15, 2011
Anybody with a bp cheating spouse?
why me

Sutton, MA

#2 Mar 22, 2011
I have gone through that, and my wife denied it to this very day. It has happened twice with her. She will find excuses for the reason they where around each other. She lies to make herself look like miss innocent. Don't be fooled. If it has happened once, it will usually happen again. The best part of it all is she has accused me of having an affair on her, so be prepared.

Since: Dec 10

Brisbane, Australia

#3 Mar 24, 2011
paul and why me
yes most of them cheat , if not in front of you then behind your back . They are always looking searching for someone new to seduce . Especially if they are unmedicated ..they convince them selves that you are boring , then run to another , hide all the awful truth with lies ..then when you catch them out they deny it .
even with all the phone evidence and internet evidence he/ she will still lie and get angry .
if confronted it will all turn out to be your fault and you are stalking them !!
dont expect any loyaties ..or faithfulness with a BP it is Betrayal all the way down the line .
karen

Millinocket, ME

#4 May 10, 2011
How about this!- I was told that I needed to appologize to his cheating GF for causing her husband to know the truth after he contacted me and also I needed to appologize to his parents because they live in a small town and rumors are flying. So much more fun to cheat when it is all a secret I guess. You are not really that kind of cheating person if no one knows! This should be made into a comedy.
Tina

Moorestown, NJ

#5 Aug 18, 2011
Wow. I had to walk in on my Bp boyfriend cheating and he still denied it w/ no clothes on while in the bedroom w/ her. Through the entire relationship he made me fully aware of his checkered past with loyalty. I guess I should have seen that coming. What a buzz kill.
Amazed SA

Durban, South Africa

#6 Aug 19, 2011
Bitterbabe wrote:
paul and why me
yes most of them cheat , if not in front of you then behind your back . They are always looking searching for someone new to seduce . Especially if they are unmedicated ..they convince them selves that you are boring , then run to another , hide all the awful truth with lies ..then when you catch them out they deny it .
even with all the phone evidence and internet evidence he/ she will still lie and get angry .
if confronted it will all turn out to be your fault and you are stalking them !!
dont expect any loyaties ..or faithfulness with a BP it is Betrayal all the way down the line .
My fiance (BP) cheated constantly, either with call girls or anyone that would pay him attention. I was mortified when I discovered. It was on his phone in black and white and he denied it and called me a f@@ ng snoop It ws suddenly my problem Phones were thrown at me as I had dared to ask him what was happening Constantly looking at internet porn and this shocked me to my core as I did not even know that people looked at porn. We got engaged and 4 days later travelled to another city overseas and went to call girls!!! all just blew my mind. He used to enter onto adult web sites and join with a picutre of himself and still deny that he did it. Would say someone must have done it.
beenbpburned

Chicago, IL

#7 Aug 21, 2011
Tina wrote:
Wow. I had to walk in on my Bp boyfriend cheating and he still denied it w/ no clothes on while in the bedroom w/ her. Through the entire relationship he made me fully aware of his checkered past with loyalty. I guess I should have seen that coming. What a buzz kill.
Totally been there, done that, too. However, stupid me believed him when he said he was too drunk. All the crying, flowers, vows to change... I took him back. 3 months later he proposed. Prooving to me he would make these wonderful changes to have a great life together. 3 weeks after that he took another girl out on a date behind my back. I didn't find out until 2 more months later when I cuaght him on very graphic adult dating profiles.
The hypersexuality thing is unbelievable. Here I am months later and still trying to get through the trauma.
Amazed SA

Durban, South Africa

#9 Aug 22, 2011
It is marvelous and very healing for me to read what everyone else has to say. Unless you have been involved in a relationship with a BP man you will never understand the trauma, betrayal, anxiety, stress, humiliation, and all other emotions that one goes through. The FEAR that I used to feel every time I wanted to leave (9 times)was immense and at first I could not understand what was happening. How could someone profess to love you so much but treat you so badly!! I just knew I had to run and very fast at that!!!! Could not pin point the reasons, it was a general overall feeling. It was only in the last year did I ruly realise that he was mentally ill and unbalanced. Looking back I now realise that I should have disreagarded everything else, the alchohol, call girls, other girls,web sites, lies, deceipt and on and on...... The MOST important thing is the way he spoke to me and treated me. No one should ever allow themselves to be spoken to in that manner, regardless. No amount of spoiling and affection is ever going to fix the damage that the emotional screaming and abuse does to a person. It will never improve. I truly dont believe that they are able to love unconditionally, it is all about them and what suits the mood at the time. You are only another cog in the wheel and they move on very quickly. They will cry and declare their love and within a couple of days will have someone new. Thank goodness for that as it helped knowing there was someone else and that he would not 'harass' me with flowers,calls, sms's etc....
Thank you to you all for sharing your experiences. If you are stillinvolved with a BP man, please turn your back and get out as fast as you can. You deserve so much more and never forget that ' no one deserves to be emotionally abused, becasue that is what it is. I am grateful on a daily basis that Ihave the knowledge and strength that I have. I am thankful for the peace and quiet in my life
Face

AOL

#10 Aug 22, 2011
I forgot which spouse I cheated on....I am Bi=Polar so does that count against me?

Since: Dec 10

Australia

#11 Aug 30, 2011
AMAZED SA
such a great description of the utter disgraceful situations a bp can bestow on innocent partners.
all the seduction and charm is readily available at first , then once they know they have got you , that all disappears and you become the enermy .
whilst they treat strangers and other people with such polite manners , they treat you with disdain and contempt. abuse and yelling is all part of the game , there is no love , because they have a couterfeit heart . they dont give two hoots about you , they look to gain opportunitites from where ever they can from other woman, as soon as they see they can gain an opportunity or attention from someone new who doesnt know them , they go in for the kill . YES you are right sometimes within 2 days ..my ex bp used to pick a women up at a drink fridge in a petrol station or a counter at the local store. its all ..' once upon a time ' at first then world war III beginss and you become the blame for everything . I caught my ex bp in the act of sleeping with many women , lying about it , hiding it , secretly making stalking phone calls sometimes he had up to 3 women on the go at the one time , whilst professing his passionate love to me. they are masters at the art of deception and they project hate onto their prospective partners with such aggression..its beyond words. When I finally woke up after 10 years , I realised how I had wasted all my beautiful love on a ass**le. I do wonder why I was fooled for so long , and actually quite ashamed to say that I am embarrassed to state that I had love for this monster. To all those who are suffering , have suffered or still trying to figure out what the Hell is happening to your life ..RUN as fast as you can , SAVE yourself while you can .

Since: Mar 12

Mount Vernon, WA

#12 Mar 28, 2012
Bitterbabe wrote:
AMAZED SA
such a great description of the utter disgraceful situations a bp can bestow on innocent partners.
all the seduction and charm is readily available at first , then once they know they have got you , that all disappears and you become the enermy .
whilst they treat strangers and other people with such polite manners , they treat you with disdain and contempt. abuse and yelling is all part of the game , there is no love , because they have a couterfeit heart . they dont give two hoots about you , they look to gain opportunitites from where ever they can from other woman, as soon as they see they can gain an opportunity or attention from someone new who doesnt know them , they go in for the kill . YES you are right sometimes within 2 days ..my ex bp used to pick a women up at a drink fridge in a petrol station or a counter at the local store. its all ..' once upon a time ' at first then world war III beginss and you become the blame for everything . I caught my ex bp in the act of sleeping with many women , lying about it , hiding it , secretly making stalking phone calls sometimes he had up to 3 women on the go at the one time , whilst professing his passionate love to me. they are masters at the art of deception and they project hate onto their prospective partners with such aggression..its beyond words. When I finally woke up after 10 years , I realised how I had wasted all my beautiful love on a ass**le. I do wonder why I was fooled for so long , and actually quite ashamed to say that I am embarrassed to state that I had love for this monster. To all those who are suffering , have suffered or still trying to figure out what the Hell is happening to your life ..RUN as fast as you can , SAVE yourself while you can .
Rock on girl! I feel ya!!!!!
aziz

Minneapolis, MN

#13 Mar 29, 2012
this is so true.e I have a wife who cheated on me 3 times in 9 months. I was confused and fell into deep depression. nd the men she had sex were all low class, one was jobless one worked as cook in restaurant mexican. I wonder if God will punish them in the after life. She is muslim this is such a huge sin.
jay1way

Kalamazoo, MI

#15 Sep 10, 2012
all of this was very helpfull cuz i have been with my kids mom for 10yr. we are 5yr apart all that i have reed has happened to me i did not no she was bp til after we got married so now i see all the lies and thats how i ended up on this site i have 2 sons 1 is mine and whale u no what do i do i only stay cuz of my kids.......
Nutz to You

Columbia City, IN

#16 Sep 10, 2012
jay1way wrote:
all of this was very helpfull cuz i have been with my kids mom for 10yr. we are 5yr apart all that i have reed has happened to me i did not no she was bp til after we got married so now i see all the lies and thats how i ended up on this site i have 2 sons 1 is mine and whale u no what do i do i only stay cuz of my kids.......
That is the worst reason to stay. You need to leave because of your kids. Deep down I think you already know this. Think of what she has put you through. It doesn't just effect you, it effects the children.
Newly diagnosed

Stafford, VA

#17 Nov 14, 2012
I am recently diagnosed and still not stable. Currently I am on the verge of cheating and have been working with my psychiatrist to get stable so that it doesn't happen. I love my bf of two years and I want to marry him but I kno I cannot marry him like this. Reading all of your posts just reminds me of who I used to be and I have only been with him never cheated. I want to keep it that way and the fact I can't control my thoughts or sexual desires is killing me. I want to tell him so he can leave before I get out of control but I want to fix it so I don't lose him. I just don't know if I can..... Something needs to be done
Nutz

South Africa

#18 Nov 18, 2012
Hiya Newly Diagnosed, I am nutz, hahaha. No seriously, good on ya mate! I was diagnosed about 10 years ago. I am 32. And I can proudly say that I have NEVER cheated. I have done all the other crap that BP people do except drugs, blowing a partner's money or cheating. I guess because my mother did this and I saw the pain she caused. Yes, I have a seriously abnormal sexual appetite but I use it to my advantage ;-). My boyfriend enjoys all the quirks. If I am at the office I send him raunchy photo's of me so that he gets so worked up that when he comes home to me, we both enjoiy it together. The fact that you are seeing a psychiatrist is a good thing, don't stop. And it will take a while for the correct meds to kick in. Just be strong and try keep your partner involved. I usually warn my bf and say babes, I can feel a wobbly coming on. Bipolar is a crappy thing, and yes, most BP people are cheating baitches or bastards who rip people's hearts out and peg them on a barbwire fence. I just read these posts to remind myself what I am capable of and as a manual of what NOT to do. You can be faithful, if I have for so many years then hell, so can you. Good luck and just hang in there babes xxx
annie

United States

#19 Nov 21, 2012
i did not realize what a nightmare that bp could be on the spouse until the last year or two,my husband has never been diagnosed with it but he has so many of the symptoms,i am almost certain he has it,we are both 60 years old and been married for 40,a few months ago he left me and moved in with a younger woman,i am so depressed,i cannot hardly bare this,and he wants to blame me for his lust,
isabella

UK

#20 Nov 21, 2012
annie wrote:
i did not realize what a nightmare that bp could be on the spouse until the last year or two,my husband has never been diagnosed with it but he has so many of the symptoms,i am almost certain he has it,we are both 60 years old and been married for 40,a few months ago he left me and moved in with a younger woman,i am so depressed,i cannot hardly bare this,and he wants to blame me for his lust,
I didn't realise my now ex-husband had it either. I thought he suffered with depression at times and suspected him of an affair before..but the last year we were together was truly terrible. Annie, do not let him lay the blame at your door. It must be difficult for you and bp is so shocking when you discover it,.. Don't enter into arguments or discussions with him; if he is manic and you cut him out of your life, coldly, now, the mania will have to surface somewhere else; his new relationship,his family or friends. It will become clear to all that he is not in his right mind, and you will have had time to gather your wits and strength. Also, get yourself a bank account right now because when manic , a bp can wipe out your finances. I hope you have lots of support, family and friends to help you. I know you must be heart broken, but try to notice the peace in your home without the bp drama and look after yourself, xx
karen

Exeter, ME

#21 Nov 22, 2012
Oh, yes, the peace. 3 years ago, my daughter was happy he was gone, though of course she misses him. At 10, she commented on how peaceful the home was. We know there is peace but why do we miss the chaos so. Annie, I am very close to 60 AND raising 2 small girls. It has been 3 years, up and down missing him, but I think I am slowly getting to the point where I am finally free. It is hard to see the bad in someone when you love them but you can do it. It is like a bad cigarette habit when you finally quit, so happy to be free of it but at the same time missing it until finally, the good will outweigh the bad. take care. I know the pain you are feeling.
annie

United States

#22 Nov 22, 2012
my husband and his gf acts so cheerful while i suffer, his consience must not bother him a bit,he wants to bring her into my 4 grown childrens life,but they don't act like they want to be around her,i just don't see how they could be so cruel,if it was me doing him that way ,i would be ashamed to bring a bf around my kids and grandchildren

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