Since: Jun 12

Ossining, NY

#3161 Feb 9, 2014
charlotte wrote:
Hi Emily im studying physiotherapy at college .
and workin part time in a hairdressers and two nights a week waitressing.
my bf Jamie is really great hes 17 and i met him at college and we've been together 3 months hes pretty cute.
my bedwetting is better although i still wear drynites every night but i can deal with it i still couldn't sleep without protection.
Jamie knows all about it and hes cool with it amazingly, i have also shared a bed with Jamie to (if you know what i mean) and ive been ok .
things are going well .
i have also made lots of new friends at college .
HEY CHARLOTTE!!!!!!! How are you?!!!!! Good to hear from you and glad to hear that things are going well for you. It's great that your BF is accepting of your bedwetting, especially to the the point of being in bed together. Just remember that to you, 3 months seems like a lifetime. Take it slow and don't be in too much of a hurry to be intimate. You're in no position to be taking care of a baby right now. I'm sure you remember what I've posted before about this to you and others. Remember that the only way to guarantee that you won't get pregnant is to not be that intimate. Remember that the intimacy is only the icing on the cake in a relationship. You may be in college but in reality, you two are still just kids. Give it another 10 - 15 years and you'll understand what I mean. For you and the others, developing a good, strong relationship takes time, patience, and a lot of work. It's so great to hear from you and hear that things are going well. Hang in there and keep up the great work! Hugs galore from "Papa Slice".
charlotte

UK

#3162 Feb 11, 2014
Hi slice thanks for the advice .things are ok ,still needing protection at nite but in ok.
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3163 Feb 11, 2014
Hi Charlotte :) how was ur day? Could rly use ur advice on what to do bout that guy I like
Emily
X
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3164 Feb 11, 2014
Hi slice I remember u giving me that advice before :). Sadly I didn't listen and I got hurt but I'm sure Charlotte knows what she's doing and will b Alrite :)
Emily
X
charlotte

UK

#3165 Feb 11, 2014
Hi Emily, i hope your ok.how can i help you.i think i know wot in doing , its so far so gud with Jamie we went to the cinema tonite.
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3166 Feb 11, 2014
Hi Charlotte Yh I'm sure u kno what ur doing Jamie seems like a gr8 guy :). Kl wht did u c at the cinema? And basically there's this guy I like at sch but I'm not sure if he likes me and I wanna go on a date with him :) what should I do?
Emily
X

Since: Jun 12

Ossining, NY

#3167 Feb 12, 2014
Emily 9865 wrote:
Hi Charlotte Yh I'm sure u kno what ur doing Jamie seems like a gr8 guy :). Kl wht did u c at the cinema? And basically there's this guy I like at sch but I'm not sure if he likes me and I wanna go on a date with him :) what should I do?
Emily
X
Why not just ask him? Do you know him at all? The days of it being improper for a girl to ask a guy out on a date are long gone. How about starting with something really casual and not even call it a date? Maybe something you could do at school together, just to get to know him a bit better and perhaps you can eventually find out if he's "taken". That would save you the uncomfortable situation of him having to say no because he has a girlfriend, or these days, a partner (if you know what I mean). Hang in there and stay well.
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3168 Feb 12, 2014
I have talked to him a few times. He's in my English class and we worked together once on something. I asked Tracey (remember her?:)) if he was single and she said he was. Idk I'm just embaressed talking to him cos I like him so when I try and talk to him I get butterflies in my tummy and blush loads. I'm very confused atm overall not even sure if I'm ready for this :/. I keep thinking what if he doesn't like me? What if he doesn't find me attractive? What if knowing I have accidents puts him off?:( I'm not exactly the "ideal girlfriend"if u know what I mean although I'm not ugly I think I look pretty gd in my opinion anyway lol but I don't know any guys who I think want to date a girl like me :/.
Emily
X
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3169 Feb 12, 2014
On top of that I've had 2 very wet days in a row. Yesterday I had 3 day accidents and woke up this morning having leaked :(. Today I've already had 2 accidents and I'm not feeling well either :'(
Emily
X
charlotte

UK

#3170 Feb 12, 2014
Hi Emily sorry you had so many wet days. In sure you have lots going for you that you can tell this boy.just try and be yourself when you talk to him.ive found it easier to make friends at college than school i had a half day today i was wet though last nite ,i feel a bit imature now in at college and still bedwetting.hope ur ok. Hows Tracey?.
charlotte

UK

#3171 Feb 12, 2014
Btw Jamie my bf is the only person at college who knows about my bedwetting and that's the way i want it to stay.i do have female friends now at college to which is great, we hang out quite a lot.but know one knows other than Jamie.i have made lots of friends and i do get interest of boys at college but i have a bf.its amazing how easy it is to get treated like an adult at college now i don't have to wear a school uniform.

Since: Jun 12

Ossining, NY

#3172 Feb 12, 2014
Emily 9865 wrote:
I have talked to him a few times. He's in my English class and we worked together once on something. I asked Tracey (remember her?:)) if he was single and she said he was. Idk I'm just embaressed talking to him cos I like him so when I try and talk to him I get butterflies in my tummy and blush loads. I'm very confused atm overall not even sure if I'm ready for this :/. I keep thinking what if he doesn't like me? What if he doesn't find me attractive? What if knowing I have accidents puts him off?:( I'm not exactly the "ideal girlfriend"if u know what I mean although I'm not ugly I think I look pretty gd in my opinion anyway lol but I don't know any guys who I think want to date a girl like me :/.
Emily
X
You sound like a typical teenager! LOL. First off, take the bedwetting and incontinence out of the picture for now. Second, if you don't talk to him, how are you going to know whether he's interested in you if you don't talk to him? The reality is that if he really likes you, your incontinence problems won't matter. Take your time and let a relationship develop, don't look for the for the end result at the beginning. Like I said, try something simple and "benign" just so that you can get to know each other a bit more. Just reach for a friendship now and see where that takes you. And remember, it's not what you are on the outside, but what you are on the inside, or who you are. And from what I've seen so far, my opinion has not changed. You are an awesome person!!! Hugs galore. BTW, how is Tracey these days? I would assume that she is eating better and is closer to a normal weight for her size and age. Do me a favor and give each other a big hug for me.
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3173 Feb 12, 2014
Hi Charlotte :). I think I must just b goin thru a bad few days :( I hope it's just that anyway. It's gd u have found it easier to make friends at college cos I kno u had a few problems at sch :(. It's ok Dw about it it's not your fault and I'm 18 and I still wet in the day as well. I don't feel immature about it but I do feel embarrassed and unattractive to guys cos of it :/. I'm ok just a little bit down today was bad as well another 3 accidents in total :(. I was crying earlier cos I thought I might b getting worse but Tracey gave me a hug and told me to wait and c what happens. I'm stressed about a lot of things atm as well exams mainly :/ have them in June. Not looking forward to that :/. Tracey is ok :) much better than before and still at sch like me, her 18th is next week :). She lives with us and we formally adopted her :) I think she's happy. She doesn't ever wet the bed anymore (maybe 1 offs like once in December when she was rly tired and we'd been to a party so had a few drinks) she had a bf but was dumped in November :(. Can't wait till I'm in college and treated more like an adult and able to get out of this uniform and wear what I want :) I'm happy u found some gd female friends and maybe 1 day u will trust 1 enough to tell her. Friends can b so supportive and it rly helps :). How was ur day :)
Emily
X
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3174 Feb 12, 2014
Hi slice :) lol that's cos I am 1 :p. I think I'm gonna try and ask him if he wants to go for some food after sch :) like mc Donald's or fish and chips :) I'm gonna b more affectionate around him I think if he's comfortable with it, flirt a little more :) I wouldn't say I'm awesome I'm just me :/ I have my faults like not being able to hold it, getting sad and depressed easily and over the last yr there were times when I ended up coming close to doing stupid things but stopped myself. I'm talking about self harm :'( I didn't do it but I came close and Tracey stopped me. Idk y I thought about it I'm so stupid. I don't even kno y I'm telling u all this only me and Tracey kno. We r both at a kind of normal weight I'm 8st 11lbs and 5ft 6". Tracey is about 5ft 8" and (I just asked) she weighs 8st 8lbs. She probably has a few more to gain but she's doin gd :).
Emily
X
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3175 Feb 12, 2014
Thx Charlotte and slice 4 supporting me. I cried writing the last message and I just wanted to say I'm happy we r all talking again
Emily
X

Since: Jun 12

Ossining, NY

#3176 Feb 12, 2014
Emily 9865 wrote:
Hi slice :) lol that's cos I am 1 :p. I think I'm gonna try and ask him if he wants to go for some food after sch :) like mc Donald's or fish and chips :) I'm gonna b more affectionate around him I think if he's comfortable with it, flirt a little more :) I wouldn't say I'm awesome I'm just me :/ I have my faults like not being able to hold it, getting sad and depressed easily and over the last yr there were times when I ended up coming close to doing stupid things but stopped myself. I'm talking about self harm :'( I didn't do it but I came close and Tracey stopped me. Idk y I thought about it I'm so stupid. I don't even kno y I'm telling u all this only me and Tracey kno. We r both at a kind of normal weight I'm 8st 11lbs and 5ft 6". Tracey is about 5ft 8" and (I just asked) she weighs 8st 8lbs. She probably has a few more to gain but she's doin gd :).
Emily
X
You have your faults? Getting sad and depressed easily? This is NOT a fault! This is an 18 y/o who very likely has depression, on top of the normal emotional roller coaster of adolescence. You need to find things to do that can help raise your self esteem. This will help with the insecurities that you're dealing with. I can understand being embarrassed about the incontinence and bedwetting, but when are you going to let it sink in that if someone likes you, they like you for who you are. Issues like the bedwetting and incontinence are part of the package named "Emily". If they can't accept you for that, then move on. If it's a potential boyfriend, if he can't see beyond that to who you are, then he's not the right one. Don't let your hormones determine whether someone is right for you. Be yourself and take the time to get to know them. Maybe right now being a bit more friendly with him is the first step. Relationships take time. Get to know him as a friend first and somewhere in there you can tell him about your issues with bladder control. If that scares you a bit, I had been thinking about it today and thought of something. If he knows you at school, and many of the other kids know about your bladder control issues, it's a possibility that he knows already. Don't rush it. Remember that a long term relationship even as just boyfriend and girlfriend is not one that lasts 3 to 4 months, but more like 7 or 8, or even a year. Just remember that before considering intimacy, you must have a strong relationship with each other. Love is about the relationship between a couple. Getting intimate is only the icing on the cake. So far as feeling stupid about thinking about the self harm, it's not stupid, its crying out for help. I'm glad you didn't do it, and I'm glad that Tracey was there to help you work it out, but I think you need more than that. I'm worried about you. I hope you will trust me when I ask you to go talk to your mother and tell her about this, and consider finding a professional to talk to. Yea for Tracey on pretty much ending the bedwetting! Don't let that get you down. Remember that even though your mom officially adopted her you two share nothing in common genetically. I really wish there was a way that I could call you and talk to you. Go to next post.

Since: Jun 12

Ossining, NY

#3177 Feb 12, 2014
Emily, like I said, I wish there was a way to work something out so that I could call you at a different number other than your own so that there's still no way to find out exactly where you are. But the reality is that it can't happen. I sincerely hope that you will do as I ask and talk to your mum about what's going on and about ideas of someone to talk to. Is there someone at school that you can talk to such as a counselor? I don't know how things are done in the British school systems, but in the US, many school districts have a psychologist on staff. Remember it's about who you are, not what you are. Give a big hello to Tracey for me. Hang in there! Hugs, hugs, and hugs galore!
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3178 Feb 13, 2014
Hi slice. Yh we can't call each other but that's ok we can talk on here. At my school we have someone who's supposed to be a school councillor but I kno she's just a french teacher lol with no degree in psychology or anything and rly not very gd from experience. I guess I could go to my GP and c if I can get referred to talk to a psychologist but they would probably want me to go on pills that I don't want to take. The only other option is to c a private 1 but we would have to pay which we could do but still it would b expensive :/. I'm over the self harm it was last yr and I felt particularly bad and I kno how stupid it was to try and do it. I wouldn't try again to do it. I still feel a bit down tho :(. I kno it's all part of me but will anyone want that emily package cos of what it includes :/. I kno he knows about it and we r meeting up at 5 for food at mcdonalds but maybe he doesn't mind being friends with me cos of it but wouldn't want a relationship? Idk. And what do you mean about Tracey not being genetically related to me? I kno she isn't but y does it matter?
Emily
X
Emily 9865

Norwich, UK

#3179 Feb 13, 2014
So far today I've had only 1 accident :) hoping I dnt have anymore :). Doin Better than yesterday today :) I heard some yr 11 girl wet her pants in class tho :/ I feel sry for her cos she's getting teased and bullied cos of it like I was :(.
Emily
X

“It's only me!!!”

Since: Apr 13

Location hidden

#3180 Feb 13, 2014
I've never trusted pills like antidepressants - depressions and negativeness is all psychological and recent studies have said we are more likely to hang on to negative emotions then positive emotions - could be where the saying, stay positive comes from?

It's all about making best of what ever life throws at you, regardless if it's good or bad, keep going with your chin up high and a smile on your face, there is nothing in life you can't do. I was 18 only 9 years ago and it was tough and hard, you hear it's suppose to be the best part of your life but do you know what, I had a better life in my 20's than I ever have done in my teen's, I met some nice people and went out, boosted me right up and the confidence to improve myself and distracted me from my incontinent issues. Though relationships are the hardest thing but hasn't stopped me trying even if I do get shot down.:)

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