Tom Brady is Impossible

Tom Brady is Impossible

There are 108 comments on the Pats Pulpit story from Aug 7, 2014, titled Tom Brady is Impossible. In it, Pats Pulpit reports that:

Some may point to John Elway or Peyton Manning as the best comeback quarterback of all time.

Join the discussion below, or Read more at Pats Pulpit.

Rodney

Cypress, TX

#81 Sep 2, 2014
[QUOTE who="Kieth]<quoted text>
Sapp stated that avocado would make him fart worse than califlower[/QUOTE]

What kind of moron quotes anything that Warren Sapp says. After all, he bet $100k on the Broncos to win the SB. Two years after filing bankruptcy. Makes him a double retard. Everyone knows NFL Network only keeps him around for comedy relief.

More fart stories please. They are more reliable reports.
Chad

Cypress, TX

#82 Sep 2, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
Flatulence can be caused due to a wide range of reasons. More often than not, the formation of foul-smelling gas occurs due to the consumption of food items that are difficult to digest. Cutting down on the intake of these food items can certainly prove beneficial.
Consumption of Food Items that Cause Gas
Excessive production of intestinal gas could be due to the consumption of food items that are rich in fiber, starch, cellulose, or complex carbohydrates (raffinose and stachyose) which are not easily digested by our body.
Skatole (an organic compound that belongs to the indole family), short chain fatty acids, and sulfur compounds are often responsible for causing foul-smelling gas. Skatole and indole are usually the by-products of the digestion of meat. The smell of rotten eggs is mainly due to the formation of hydrogen sulfide, which may occur due to the consumption of sulfur-rich food items such as cauliflower, cabbage, broccoli, red meat, fish, legumes, etc.
Methanethiol is another gas that may form when the bacteria act on methionine, which is an amino acid that is present in nuts, seeds, meat, eggs, and fish. Here is a list of food items that may cause gas.
Cauliflower
Eggs
Meat
Potatoes
Corn
Wheat
Breads
Beans
Peas
Broccoli
Cabbage
Leeks
Radish
Brussels sprouts
Asparagus
Lentils
Onions
Garlic
Dairy products
Imbalance of the Gut Flora
The formation of excessive gas could also occur due to the imbalance of the microbial gut flora. There are certain beneficial bacteria that are essential for the healthy functioning of the body. An imbalance occurs when the number of friendly bacteria reduces. Stress and prolonged use of antibiotics could disrupt the balance of the microbial flora in the intestine, thereby affecting the digestion in an adverse manner.
Superb article.

Post more tomorrow.
Jake

Cypress, CA

#83 Sep 3, 2014
Comparing Brady, Aikman and Peyton we find that Brady has won 3 SuperBowls and came in 2nd twice with little Pro Bowl support. Aikman has won 3 SuperBowls with the help of 2 HoFers in skilled positions, while Peyton has had far more HoF and ProBowl support yet he has a losing post season record, has last years SB debacle associated with his name, and has a history of losing big games via the INT.
Disaster Blaster

Cypress, CA

#84 Sep 3, 2014
Jake wrote:
Comparing Brady, Aikman and Peyton we find that Brady has won 3 SuperBowls and came in 2nd twice with little Pro Bowl support. Aikman has won 3 SuperBowls with the help of 2 HoFers in skilled positions, while Peyton has had far more HoF and ProBowl support yet he has a losing post season record, has last years SB debacle associated with his name, and has a history of losing big games via the INT.
Superb analysis, please keep telling us more to offset the bozos who like flatulence stories, and most of them are duplicates anyway, so now I just skip over them to the football comments. Never heard the comparison with Aikman between them before. Makes you realize just how lucky we are to be seeing a QB perform so well with so little support.
Rick James

Houston, TX

#85 Sep 3, 2014
Rodney wrote:
<quoted text>
What kind of moron quotes anything that Warren Sapp says. After all, he bet $100k on the Broncos to win the SB. Two years after filing bankruptcy. Makes him a double retard. Everyone knows NFL Network only keeps him around for comedy relief.
More fart stories please. They are more reliable reports.
Flatulence Fred

Houston, TX

#86 Sep 3, 2014
Chad wrote:
<quoted text>
Superb article.
Post more tomorrow.
So, you like farting and you enjoy hearing others fart. You’ve heard that some boys can fart whenever they want to, and of course you want to know how!

Well, not all people can do it. But with some practice and patience, it should come to you.

So here it is; How to Fart on Command!

1) Get a pillow and a soft surface.
2) Place your ear on the pillow with your head turned sideways.
3) Put your butt up in the air, bringing your knees as close up to your head as possible. This relaxes your anal opening.
4) Once you’re relaxed enough, you should feel a strange sensation (it feels like a balloon inflating)…this is air traveling into your colon (intestines).
5) Through practice you will be able to do this by just sitting down.
6) Force the air back out…aka Fart!

There’s more to it than just “relaxing” you kind of have to find a way to pull air into your rectum. Getting down in that position opens you up naturally, so it’s a good starting position… what you should do then is tense your stomach muscles. When you tense your stomach muscles, you’ll feel your butt muscles tighten. Once you’ve tensed them, release tension, and then reapply it. Keep doing that, and you might feel air building up back there. It may only be a small bit at first, but it’ll get bigger the better you get at it.

Over time you should be able to skip a few steps, and just be able to fart by bending down on the ground, or even better, just by litterally “sucking in” and “blowing out.” Don’t believe me? Check some of the videos on this site out, or better yet, let Methane Junior here show how it’s done!:

reverse farting

once you start the farting on command position you will feel a very weird sensation, that is air rushing through your colon (intestines), you will feel like a balloon inflating. this is normal and once you master it, you will be able to fart by sucking and blowing
Flatulence Fred

Houston, TX

#87 Sep 3, 2014
Josh wrote:
<quoted text>
BBQ sauce trips fart alerts. Wow, great study.
Post more please
Farting Turtle Sets Off Fire Alarm After Eating Brussels Sprouts

A turtle at the Sea Life Centre in Weymouth set off emergency alarms after eating brussels sprouts when it's flatulence created bubbles so big they splashed a sensor. Marine biologist Sarah Leaney raced to the aquarium only to find everything quiet.

"When I got there, all seemed fine. I looked at the tube containing the sensor and saw a turtle beneath it. As I watched, a few large bubbles emerged from beneath him and rose to the surface next to the tube," she said.

"I realised what must have happened. We like to give all our animals a treat at Christmas and sprouts are a really healthy choice for sea turtles. But they do produce similar side-effects to those experienced by humans who eat too many sprouts."

Sarah also likes to feed eggs and cabbage to the ducks for fart experiments.
Laughing Bear Fan

Denver, CO

#88 Sep 3, 2014
Tom Lady is off to play the Dolphins as the Patriots get awarded the easiest schedule in the NFL for getting humiliated by the Manning-led Donkeys in the AFC title game
Matt Walsh

Houston, TX

#89 Sep 3, 2014
Laughing Bear Fan wrote:
Tom Lady is off to play the Dolphins as the Patriots get awarded the easiest schedule in the NFL for getting humiliated by the Manning-led Donkeys in the AFC title game
Speaking of SB debacles associated with names...18-1 still makes me laugh....

Only if I was still the Patriots video assistant...
Josh McDaniels

Houston, TX

#90 Sep 3, 2014
Matt Walsh wrote:
<quoted text>
Speaking of SB debacles associated with names...18-1 still makes me laugh....
Only if I was still the Patriots video assistant...
Superb reminder, please keep telling us more to offset the bozos who have Peyton Manning boner stories, and most of them are duplicates anyway, so now I just skip over them to the Flatulence Fred comments.
Flatulence Fred

Houston, TX

#91 Sep 3, 2014
Fart research

Dr Michael Levitt has been researching farts for many years. He is informally known as "The King Of Gas". Back in the 1970s, he talked in the New England Journal Of Medicine of the rise of what he hoped would be a new medical speciality - flatology. He pointed out several cases where analysis of the flatus gas composition had provided valuable clues to the patient’s diagnosis. He predicted that farts would become the "rightful province of both flatologists and scatologists".

The gastroenterologist, Professor Terry Bolin, has also been interested in farts for many years. He has previously pointed out that there is not a single medical case on record of anybody ever dying from excessive active farting, or from passive farting (being in the same lift as an active farter).

In 1997, Terry Bolin and the nutritionist, Rosemary Stanton, released their ground-breaking book, Wind Breaks. They were virtually forced into writing this book, because they found they could not answer basic questions from their patients about farts. They carried out a study of flatus emissions in 120 healthy men and women, to find out what was "normal" for this group.
They found that in their study, the average number of farts for women was about 7 per day, but 12 for men. This was probably because men ate more food than women. More food means that the bacteria in the large intestine have more to work with.

In general, the amount of farting was related to how much fibre you ate. Some high-fibre eaters had up to 30 farts per day. In general, it’s good to have a high-fibre diet. But a high-fibre diet has the "disadvantage" of making you fart more frequently. On the other hand, if you cut down on fibre in your diet, you increase your risk of constipation and bowel cancer.

Another finding was that women tended to pass flatus only when they were in the bathroom. However, men were much less inhibited. In this study, the farts of men tend to be aromatic than those of women. This was probably because men eat more spices, and also eat more compounds that contain sulphur (such as are present in meat).

The magnificent fart | Fart research | Beanz make you fart | Gases & bacteria in the gut | What smells in fart gas?|

Strange but true
Laughing Bear Fan

Denver, CO

#92 Sep 3, 2014
It makes you wonder why the Cheatriots draft a film student in the 6th round each year
SeaHawks Fan

Cypress, CA

#93 Sep 5, 2014
Laughing Bear Fan wrote:
It makes you wonder why the Cheatriots draft a film student in the 6th round each year
It's because the Broncos cant win any other way. And when that doesn't work they take out their opponents best defensive player at the knees. Simple. Reason why Broncos will never win with Fox or Peyton. Lack of confidence coupled with poor tactics and cooking when it counts.
Seattle, the New America's Team.
Laughing Bear Fan

Denver, CO

#94 Sep 5, 2014
SeaHawks Fan wrote:
<quoted text>
It's because the Broncos cant win any other way. And when that doesn't work they take out their opponents best defensive player at the knees. Simple. Reason why Broncos will never win with Fox or Peyton. Lack of confidence coupled with poor tactics and cooking when it counts.
Seattle, the New America's Team.
Changing allegiances?
Seattle..........Nouveau America's Team
Cheatriots....Faux America's Team
Ted

Cypress, TX

#95 Sep 5, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
<quoted text>
So, you like farting and you enjoy hearing others fart. You’ve heard that some boys can fart whenever they want to, and of course you want to know how!
Well, not all people can do it. But with some practice and patience, it should come to you.
So here it is; How to Fart on Command!
1) Get a pillow and a soft surface.
2) Place your ear on the pillow with your head turned sideways.
3) Put your butt up in the air, bringing your knees as close up to your head as possible. This relaxes your anal opening.
4) Once you’re relaxed enough, you should feel a strange sensation (it feels like a balloon inflating)…this is air traveling into your colon (intestines).
5) Through practice you will be able to do this by just sitting down.
6) Force the air back out…aka Fart!
There’s more to it than just “relaxing” you kind of have to find a way to pull air into your rectum. Getting down in that position opens you up naturally, so it’s a good starting position… what you should do then is tense your stomach muscles. When you tense your stomach muscles, you’ll feel your butt muscles tighten. Once you’ve tensed them, release tension, and then reapply it. Keep doing that, and you might feel air building up back there. It may only be a small bit at first, but it’ll get bigger the better you get at it.
Over time you should be able to skip a few steps, and just be able to fart by bending down on the ground, or even better, just by litterally “sucking in” and “blowing out.” Don’t believe me? Check some of the videos on this site out, or better yet, let Methane Junior here show how it’s done!:
reverse farting
once you start the farting on command position you will feel a very weird sensation, that is air rushing through your colon (intestines), you will feel like a balloon inflating. this is normal and once you master it, you will be able to fart by sucking and blowing
Superb article. Thanks.
Seahawks Fan

Cypress, CA

#96 Sep 5, 2014
Josh McDaniels wrote:
<quoted text>
Superb reminder, please keep telling us more to offset the bozos who have Peyton Manning boner stories, and most of them are duplicates anyway, so now I just skip over them to the Flatulence Fred comments.
Farts over football, it's who you are. Go o any establishment and yell it out. See if they don't try and twist our head on straight. Morons, farts over football. Your choice selection puts you at the bottom of the barrel.:D
Seahawks Fan 2

Cypress, TX

#97 Sep 5, 2014
Josh McDaniels wrote:
<quoted text>
Superb reminder, please keep telling us more to offset the bozos who have Peyton Manning boner stories, and most of them are duplicates anyway, so now I just skip over them to the Flatulence Fred comments.
I agree.
12th Man

Cypress, TX

#98 Sep 5, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
<quoted text>
Farting Turtle Sets Off Fire Alarm After Eating Brussels Sprouts
A turtle at the Sea Life Centre in Weymouth set off emergency alarms after eating brussels sprouts when it's flatulence created bubbles so big they splashed a sensor. Marine biologist Sarah Leaney raced to the aquarium only to find everything quiet.
"When I got there, all seemed fine. I looked at the tube containing the sensor and saw a turtle beneath it. As I watched, a few large bubbles emerged from beneath him and rose to the surface next to the tube," she said.
"I realised what must have happened. We like to give all our animals a treat at Christmas and sprouts are a really healthy choice for sea turtles. But they do produce similar side-effects to those experienced by humans who eat too many sprouts."
Sarah also likes to feed eggs and cabbage to the ducks for fart experiments.
Story of the week. More like this would be appreciated.
No on cares about gay rants on the Broncos and Manning. Only losers talk about losers.

Go Hawks.
Seahawks Fan

Cypress, CA

#99 Sep 5, 2014
12th Man wrote:
<quoted text>
Story of the week. More like this would be appreciated.
No on cares about gay rants on the Broncos and Manning. Only losers talk about losers.
Go Hawks.
What makes them gay rants. Your fears?
True HawksFan

Cypress, TX

#100 Sep 6, 2014
12th Man wrote:
<quoted text>
Story of the week. More like this would be appreciated.
No on cares about gay rants on the Broncos and Manning. Only losers talk about losers.
Go Hawks.
Very true

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