Tom Brady is Impossible

Tom Brady is Impossible

There are 108 comments on the Pats Pulpit story from Aug 7, 2014, titled Tom Brady is Impossible. In it, Pats Pulpit reports that:

Some may point to John Elway or Peyton Manning as the best comeback quarterback of all time.

Join the discussion below, or Read more at Pats Pulpit.

Hunting Troll Hunters

Houston, TX

#61 Aug 28, 2014
Troll Hunter wrote:
<quoted text>
You have been tabbed an immature troll for the following reasons;
Think of all the countless hours you spent reading those comments and getting infuriated to the point of making emotional outbursts revealing to the world you can't control your own emotions, and how you deal with it, by making perverse, lowlife comments instead of responding to the details of the comment themselves. Talk about frustrated, your claim, You are the poster boy. As for how you are lacking in the emotional and sexual arenas of your life, we all can only pity you, and we don't need to know the details of your life that you try and attach to others. Some things are best left unsaid. Too bad you missed a proper upbringing otherwise you would know how to properly respond instead of shooting off vulgarities everytime someone disagrees with you. So, so sad. Maybe you should get a pet, they won't understand your foul language, problem is you would probably mistreat they them, so ...never mind.
P.S. you still haven't given any actionable intel that shows Peyton is in Brady's class. Hundreds of emotional outbursts and swear words without a single justification for Peyton. You are ample proof that Brady is by far better since you can't find anything and instead spend all your time wasting hundreds of comments on outbursts as do the lowlifes which you accuse others of being.
Awww, this reall hits home coming from the king troll himself...lmfao!

P.S. Why would I have to give "any actionable intel" that shows Peyton is in Brady's class...unlike you I dont care who is better!! And from the lack of response you get daily on the subject, other than charles (lmao), no one else gives a shit either!!!!

But one thing is for sure, your constant boneriffic man love rants about who is better on EVERY thread has lead to where we are today so great job!!
Head Games

Miami, FL

#62 Aug 28, 2014
Zoo inside Head wrote:
<quoted text>
I know Jake, too, he was around here a few weeks ago. Got picked up for soliciting oral sex to a male cop.
Bartender lives in a trailer with his mom, that's all I know.
Cara Murphy has flaming STDs and she still puts out.
Insight is all of the above, and is too dumb to even change either his writing style or his ip location on a site that reveals it to all viewers. Cypress, CA must be a leper colony.
What ESPN and the media won't tell you is that Brady hates jocksniffers. He views them as losers and societal outcasts.
Rick James

Houston, TX

#63 Aug 28, 2014
Zoo inside Head wrote:
<quoted text>

Insight is all of the above, and is too dumb to even change either his writing style

or his ip location on a site that reveals it to all viewers.

Cypress, CA must be a leper colony.

Cypress Head

Miami, FL

#64 Aug 28, 2014
Zoo inside Head wrote:
<quoted text>
I know Jake, too, he was around here a few weeks ago. Got picked up for soliciting oral sex to a male cop.
Bartender lives in a trailer with his mom, that's all I know.
Cara Murphy has flaming STDs and she still puts out.
Insight is all of the above, and is too dumb to even change either his writing style or his ip location on a site that reveals it to all viewers. Cypress, CA must be a leper colony.
Like Zoo inside Head said, it takes a special kind of simpleton to argue against something so plainly evident.
Slapdick Jones

Miami, FL

#65 Aug 28, 2014
Head Games wrote:
<quoted text>
What ESPN and the media won't tell you is that Brady hates jocksniffers. He views them as losers and societal outcasts.
Good post. Keep it up.
Flatulence Fred

Houston, TX

#66 Aug 28, 2014
Tom wrote:
<quoted text>
Please post up more fart games
Thanks
Atomic Fart

By FAR Apps

Description
+** NEW ** Remote Detonator!
+ FART DRUMS!
+ SIMON FARTS!(Simon Says)
+ TIMED FARTS!
+ MOVEMENT DETECTION!
+ REPEAT option for TIMED and MOVEMENT modes!
+ 30 FART SOUNDS!
+ SHARE IT ON FACEBOOK OR E-MAIL!

Customer Reviews
Life changing app

by Fart critic
My farts were jealous when they heard this.i use to record my own farts until this app. My friends thought I was weird when I would record farts but now I hav more friends.

Funny..........but

by Nro911
As funny as it was my aunt didn't believe what had happened. When I did it it was on my phone because when I tried to connect to hers it didn't work. Plz help

Atomic fart a blast

by Badger an north
This app is great. Remote detonation is great at stuffy meetings or parties. Real sounds only thing missing is the smell
Flatulence Fred

Houston, TX

#67 Aug 28, 2014
Christain wrote:
<quoted text>
This is good info. 100% the best, way better than reading daily posts of some man fetish of Manning vs Brady that no one cares about.
Track Your Farts With an App - Fart Code

But out of the storm came one brave developer, who chose to add purpose to digital pooting: with the Fart Code app.

We knew that wearables could be way more fun

Fart Code, it turns out, is more of an analyzer than a toy. It uses your iPhone’s camera to scan the barcodes of food products. It then checks the ingredients and tells the user what kind of fart it will likely produce, and what’s in the food that causes it. Types of farts are ranked on a scale from “Stinky” to “Toxic,” and the ingredients are explained.

"We scanned a bottle of hickory-flavored barbecue sauce and were surprised to get a “Gross” fart rating, with the culprit ingredient being fructose"
Troll Hunter

Cypress, CA

#68 Sep 1, 2014
Hunting Troll Hunters wrote:
<quoted text>
Awww, this reall hits home coming from the king troll himself...lmfao!
P.S. Why would I have to give "any actionable intel" that shows Peyton is in Brady's class...unlike you I dont care who is better!! And from the lack of response you get daily on the subject, other than charles (lmao), no one else gives a shit either!!!!
But one thing is for sure, your constant boneriffic man love rants about who is better on EVERY thread has lead to where we are today so great job!!
Either that or it's your language and lack of courtesy that chases everyone away. It takes someone special to stick around even when the company is derisive, perverse, and so often wrong like you are. Bet whoever you hang out with is just like you because so few people would want to be around you. Just look at the guys who agree with you. Miami, Denver and Katy are all derisive, perverse and so often wrong.
Janitor

Cypress, CA

#69 Sep 2, 2014
Just saw NFL Access. They were doing a piece on the perfect QB. It came down to Brady and Rodgers. Peyton and Brees were specifically identified as not being as sharp mentally. Well what do you know. Could it be that playing in more difficult enrinonments like New England and Green Bay makes the difference? Or is it just a coincidence that the weaker minds played in domes that are temperature controlled and lack any conditions that make the game harder for the QB to work through? Concurr. Brady and Rodgers are #1 and #1b with Brees and Peyton a distant 3-4.
Especially liked that Richard Sherman who said Peyton wasn't all that bright just after the SB because he couldn't read the Seattle defensive reads is often shown saying that Peyton is the brightest QB. What they don't tell you is Shermans positive comments on Peyton took place before the SB not after. Interesting that the NFL keeps showing it to limit the damage the SB debacle did to Peyton.
NFL Access also identified Brady and not Manning as last years MVP because he did so much without the quality support players to assist him like Peyton had. Especially liked that Brady beat Manning head to head before losing Gronk and Amendola's injury getting worse.
They then went on o pick the MVP and it was Brady or Rodgers, not Peyton because he has so much support on the offensive side of the ball to juice his stat numbers. Don't you just love it when another station uncovers the ESPN Peyton Manning support channel?
Flatulence Fred

Houston, TX

#70 Sep 2, 2014
Christain wrote:
<quoted text>
This is good info. 100% the best, way better than reading daily posts of some man fetish of Manning vs Brady that no one cares about.
Here is somemore good info so you dont have to read the continuous, repetitive man fetish of Manning vs Brady:

Le Pétomane was the stage name of the French flatulist (professional farter) and entertainer Joseph Pujol (June 1, 1857 – 1945). He was famous for his remarkable control of the abdominal muscles, which enabled him to seemingly fart at will. His stage name combines the French verb péter, "to fart" with the -mane, "-maniac" suffix, which translates to "fartomaniac". The profession is also referred to as "flatulist", "farteur", or "fartiste".]

It is a common misconception that Joseph Pujol actually passed intestinal gas as part of his stage performance. Rather, Pujol was able to "inhale" or move air into his rectum and then control the release of that air with his anal sphincter muscles. Evidence of his ability to control those muscles was seen in the early accounts of demonstrations of his abilities to fellow soldiers.

Le Pétomane left an enduring legacy and has inspired a number of artistic works. These include several musicals based on his life, such as The Fartiste (awarded Best Musical at the 2006 New York International Fringe Festival) and Seth Rozin's A Passing Wind which was premiered at the Philadelphia International Festival of the Arts in 2011. In addition, Le Pétomane was added to David Lee's 2007 reworked revival of the 1953 Broadway play Can-Can, which had originally been written by Abe Burroughs and Cole Porter. The updated play, staged at the Pasadena Playhouse, featured musical theatre actor Robert Yacko as the fartiste, with sound effects provided by the band's trombone and piccolo players. More recently, the re-released works of English toilet humour specialist Ivor Biggun include "Southern Breeze", a song about a "Famous French Farteur" who describes in rhyme a stroll through a farmyard, accompanied by appropriate farting noises.

Los Angeles-based Sherbourne Press published Jean Nohain and F. Caradec's Le Pétomane as a small hardcover English language edition in 1967. Due to its ‘sensitive’ nature, the usual national publicity venues shied away, some claiming that an author was needed for interviews (both elderly writers lived in France). However,‘behind the curtain’ acceptance created a buzz within the national radio/TV promotional circuit and word-of-mouth discussion kept the book in stores for several years. Dorset Press, a division of Barnes & Noble, reissued the book in 1993.

The character has been portrayed several times in film. In 1979 Ian MacNaughton made a short humorous film, written by Galton and Simpson called Le Pétomane, based on Pujol's story and starring veteran comic actor Leonard Rossiter. The 1983 Italian movie Il Petomane, directed by Pasquale Festa Campanile and starring Ugo Tognazzi, gives a poetic rendition of the character, contrasting his deep longing for normalcy with the condition of 'freak' to which his act relegated him. The 1998 documentary Le Pétomane by Igor Vamos examines Joseph Pujol's place in history through archival films (none of which actually include him), historical documents, photographs, recreations and fake or tongue-in-cheek interviews.

Le Petomane is also referenced in Blazing Saddles, a 1974 satirical Western comedy film directed by Mel Brooks. Brooks appears in multiple supporting roles, including the dim-witted Governor William J. Le Petomane, whose name suggests he is full of hot air.
Flatulence Fred

Houston, TX

#71 Sep 2, 2014
John wrote:
<quoted text>
Great work, outstandinf fart insight. Keep up the reports.
The Science of Farting

Do you know what causes farts?

Farting
What exactly is a fart? The word "FART" can stand for: Frequency Actuated Rectal Tremor. Farting, also known as flatulence, is the act of passing intestinal gas from the anus. Intestinal gas comes from several sources: air we swallow, gas that seeps into our intestines from our blood, gas produced by chemical reactions in our guts, and gas produced by bacteria living in our guts. Burps are not farts that come out your mouth. They have to do with your stomach.

Who Cut the Cheese? Finding the Farter
Have you heard that saying: "Whoever smelt it, dealt it?" A fart smells the same to the person who delivered it and to the person smelling it. However, the farter probably smells it last because the fart is propelled away from the body in the opposite direction of the farter's nose. Unless the fart happens upwind.

Why Do Farts Smell?
The smell of farts comes from gas and mercaptans (other gases) in the mixture. These compounds contain sulfur. The more sulfur-rich foods you eat, the more sulfides and mercaptans will be made by the bacteria in you guts, and the more your farts will stink. Foods like cauliflower, eggs and meat are really bad for making stinky farts. Beans on the other hand, may make you fart a lot but they aren't usually the smelly kind.

Let it Rip! The Sound Of Farting
The sound of a fart is caused by the vibrations of the anal opening. The sound of your fart depends on the speed of the fart leaving your body and the tightness of the sphincter muscles of your anus.

Famous Fart Food
The most famous farting food is the bean. What is it about these little things that cause such a stink? Beans contain sugars that we can't digest. When these sugars make it to our intestines, the bacteria go berserk, start feasting and make loads of gas. Other foods that are great for making you fart are broccoli, cabbage, raw apples, milk and raisins. So if your best friend has a broccoli and cabbage salad for lunch with an apple for recess and a big glass of milk - Don't sit too close on the bus ride home.

Farting Under Pressure
Think about this: If you could go into space without a suit and you let one rip, your fart would have enough pressure to push you forward.
Jake

Cypress, CA

#72 Sep 2, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
<quoted text>
Here is somemore good info so you dont have to read the continuous, repetitive man fetish of Manning vs Brady:
Le Pétomane was the stage name of the French flatulist (professional farter) and entertainer Joseph Pujol (June 1, 1857 – 1945). He was famous for his remarkable control of the abdominal muscles, which enabled him to seemingly fart at will. His stage name combines the French verb péter, "to fart" with the -mane, "-maniac" suffix, which translates to "fartomaniac". The profession is also referred to as "flatulist", "farteur", or "fartiste".]
It is a common misconception that Joseph Pujol actually passed intestinal gas as part of his stage performance. Rather, Pujol was able to "inhale" or move air into his rectum and then control the release of that air with his anal sphincter muscles. Evidence of his ability to control those muscles was seen in the early accounts of demonstrations of his abilities to fellow soldiers.
Le Pétomane left an enduring legacy and has inspired a number of artistic works. These include several musicals based on his life, such as The Fartiste (awarded Best Musical at the 2006 New York International Fringe Festival) and Seth Rozin's A Passing Wind which was premiered at the Philadelphia International Festival of the Arts in 2011. In addition, Le Pétomane was added to David Lee's 2007 reworked revival of the 1953 Broadway play Can-Can, which had originally been written by Abe Burroughs and Cole Porter. The updated play, staged at the Pasadena Playhouse, featured musical theatre actor Robert Yacko as the fartiste, with sound effects provided by the band's trombone and piccolo players. More recently, the re-released works of English toilet humour specialist Ivor Biggun include "Southern Breeze", a song about a "Famous French Farteur" who describes in rhyme a stroll through a farmyard, accompanied by appropriate farting noises.
Los Angeles-based Sherbourne Press published Jean Nohain and F. Caradec's Le Pétomane as a small hardcover English language edition in 1967. Due to its ‘sensitive’ nature, the usual national publicity venues shied away, some claiming that an author was needed for interviews (both elderly writers lived in France). However,‘behind the curtain’ acceptance created a buzz within the national radio/TV promotional circuit and word-of-mouth discussion kept the book in stores for several years. Dorset Press, a division of Barnes & Noble, reissued the book in 1993.
The character has been portrayed several times in film. In 1979 Ian MacNaughton made a short humorous film, written by Galton and Simpson called Le Pétomane, based on Pujol's story and starring veteran comic actor Leonard Rossiter. The 1983 Italian movie Il Petomane, directed by Pasquale Festa Campanile and starring Ugo Tognazzi, gives a poetic rendition of the character, contrasting his deep longing for normalcy with the condition of 'freak' to which his act relegated him. The 1998 documentary Le Pétomane by Igor Vamos examines Joseph Pujol's place in history through archival films (none of which actually include him), historical documents, photographs, recreations and fake or tongue-in-cheek interviews.
Le Petomane is also referenced in Blazing Saddles, a 1974 satirical Western comedy film directed by Mel Brooks. Brooks appears in multiple supporting roles, including the dim-witted Governor William J. Le Petomane, whose name suggests he is full of hot air.
Is that Le Petomane short for Peyto(n) Mann(ing)?
Jake

Cypress, CA

#73 Sep 2, 2014
If you read the wove comment you will learn of a man named Petomane who was full of hot air and a flatulist. Could it be the name Petomane is short for Peyto(n) Mann(ing)? Maybe he was just named after him. They do seem similar.
Jake

Cypress, CA

#74 Sep 2, 2014
NFL Access just reported that Wes Welker was suspended for four game because of his use of PEDs (performance enhancing drugs). Interesting that while with Brady for 6 years, Welker never tested positive for PEDs but with Manning for only 1 year (prior to the second starting), he is. With Brady, Welker doesn't get any concussions in 672 receptions but with Manning Welker gets 3 concussions because Manning throws him into danger.
NFL Access also had analysts laughing because they felt the loss of Welker means nothing to the Broncos because they have such a wealth of receivers. One even mentioned that Peyton has always had a wealth of offensive support, the best ever. How is it that Brady is on Manning's heels for cumulative stats and Brees and Luck are ahead of Peyton's statistical pace.
Why then with this wealth of offensive support does Peyton put up 37 points a game but when it comes to the post season he forgets how to play? 8 points in the SB for the best ever offense was a massive let down and an embarrassment, even if Peyton refuses to admit it.
Lastly, how is it that nobody reported anything about Peyton's slot receiver being found with PEDs in his system until after he lost his appeal when every other PED user is reported long before the appeal is to take place? Seems the League Front Office is up to their usual tricks in trying to get Peyton a Lombardi Trophy.
Phil

Cypress, TX

#75 Sep 2, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
<quoted text>
Here is somemore good info so you dont have to read the continuous, repetitive man fetish of Manning vs Brady:
Le Pétomane was the stage name of the French flatulist (professional farter) and entertainer Joseph Pujol (June 1, 1857 – 1945). He was famous for his remarkable control of the abdominal muscles, which enabled him to seemingly fart at will. His stage name combines the French verb péter, "to fart" with the -mane, "-maniac" suffix, which translates to "fartomaniac". The profession is also referred to as "flatulist", "farteur", or "fartiste".]
It is a common misconception that Joseph Pujol actually passed intestinal gas as part of his stage performance. Rather, Pujol was able to "inhale" or move air into his rectum and then control the release of that air with his anal sphincter muscles. Evidence of his ability to control those muscles was seen in the early accounts of demonstrations of his abilities to fellow soldiers.
Le Pétomane left an enduring legacy and has inspired a number of artistic works. These include several musicals based on his life, such as The Fartiste (awarded Best Musical at the 2006 New York International Fringe Festival) and Seth Rozin's A Passing Wind which was premiered at the Philadelphia International Festival of the Arts in 2011. In addition, Le Pétomane was added to David Lee's 2007 reworked revival of the 1953 Broadway play Can-Can, which had originally been written by Abe Burroughs and Cole Porter. The updated play, staged at the Pasadena Playhouse, featured musical theatre actor Robert Yacko as the fartiste, with sound effects provided by the band's trombone and piccolo players. More recently, the re-released works of English toilet humour specialist Ivor Biggun include "Southern Breeze", a song about a "Famous French Farteur" who describes in rhyme a stroll through a farmyard, accompanied by appropriate farting noises.
Los Angeles-based Sherbourne Press published Jean Nohain and F. Caradec's Le Pétomane as a small hardcover English language edition in 1967. Due to its ‘sensitive’ nature, the usual national publicity venues shied away, some claiming that an author was needed for interviews (both elderly writers lived in France). However,‘behind the curtain’ acceptance created a buzz within the national radio/TV promotional circuit and word-of-mouth discussion kept the book in stores for several years. Dorset Press, a division of Barnes & Noble, reissued the book in 1993.
The character has been portrayed several times in film. In 1979 Ian MacNaughton made a short humorous film, written by Galton and Simpson called Le Pétomane, based on Pujol's story and starring veteran comic actor Leonard Rossiter. The 1983 Italian movie Il Petomane, directed by Pasquale Festa Campanile and starring Ugo Tognazzi, gives a poetic rendition of the character, contrasting his deep longing for normalcy with the condition of 'freak' to which his act relegated him. The 1998 documentary Le Pétomane by Igor Vamos examines Joseph Pujol's place in history through archival films (none of which actually include him), historical documents, photographs, recreations and fake or tongue-in-cheek interviews.
Le Petomane is also referenced in Blazing Saddles, a 1974 satirical Western comedy film directed by Mel Brooks. Brooks appears in multiple supporting roles, including the dim-witted Governor William J. Le Petomane, whose name suggests he is full of hot air.
Very historical. Thanks!
Ted

Cypress, TX

#76 Sep 2, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
<quoted text>
The Science of Farting
Do you know what causes farts?
Farting
What exactly is a fart? The word "FART" can stand for: Frequency Actuated Rectal Tremor. Farting, also known as flatulence, is the act of passing intestinal gas from the anus. Intestinal gas comes from several sources: air we swallow, gas that seeps into our intestines from our blood, gas produced by chemical reactions in our guts, and gas produced by bacteria living in our guts. Burps are not farts that come out your mouth. They have to do with your stomach.
Who Cut the Cheese? Finding the Farter
Have you heard that saying: "Whoever smelt it, dealt it?" A fart smells the same to the person who delivered it and to the person smelling it. However, the farter probably smells it last because the fart is propelled away from the body in the opposite direction of the farter's nose. Unless the fart happens upwind.
Why Do Farts Smell?
The smell of farts comes from gas and mercaptans (other gases) in the mixture. These compounds contain sulfur. The more sulfur-rich foods you eat, the more sulfides and mercaptans will be made by the bacteria in you guts, and the more your farts will stink. Foods like cauliflower, eggs and meat are really bad for making stinky farts. Beans on the other hand, may make you fart a lot but they aren't usually the smelly kind.
Let it Rip! The Sound Of Farting
The sound of a fart is caused by the vibrations of the anal opening. The sound of your fart depends on the speed of the fart leaving your body and the tightness of the sphincter muscles of your anus.
Famous Fart Food
The most famous farting food is the bean. What is it about these little things that cause such a stink? Beans contain sugars that we can't digest. When these sugars make it to our intestines, the bacteria go berserk, start feasting and make loads of gas. Other foods that are great for making you fart are broccoli, cabbage, raw apples, milk and raisins. So if your best friend has a broccoli and cabbage salad for lunch with an apple for recess and a big glass of milk - Don't sit too close on the bus ride home.
Farting Under Pressure
Think about this: If you could go into space without a suit and you let one rip, your fart would have enough pressure to push you forward.
Farts in space. Great facts.
Josh

Cypress, TX

#77 Sep 2, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
<quoted text>
Track Your Farts With an App - Fart Code
But out of the storm came one brave developer, who chose to add purpose to digital pooting: with the Fart Code app.
We knew that wearables could be way more fun
Fart Code, it turns out, is more of an analyzer than a toy. It uses your iPhone’s camera to scan the barcodes of food products. It then checks the ingredients and tells the user what kind of fart it will likely produce, and what’s in the food that causes it. Types of farts are ranked on a scale from “Stinky” to “Toxic,” and the ingredients are explained.
"We scanned a bottle of hickory-flavored barbecue sauce and were surprised to get a “Gross” fart rating, with the culprit ingredient being fructose"
BBQ sauce trips fart alerts. Wow, great study.

Post more please
Jake

Cypress, CA

#78 Sep 2, 2014
Today on NFL Gameday Season Review, Warren Sapp mentioned that Brady dragged his 31st rated defense to a SB the last time they were there and last year Brady dragged the 26th rated defense to the AFC Championship game. And last year he also had no offensive help. The consensus was that if Brady gets any help at all, he has a good chance of taking the SB. After all, if Brady could go that far without any kind of a defense and an offense that was filled with rookies dropping passes, what might Brady do with some real professionals around him.
Heath, who picks Aaron Rodgers as the smartest QB says Brady deserved the MVP last year because he had no defense, no offense and still beat Manning head to head and was one league officials decision away from having the top seed in the post season. Everyone then chimed in and said ...nobody can do more with less than Brady.
They closed by adding that if the Pats ever put some good receivers around Brady for a change, he will win it all.
Adam

Cypress, TX

#79 Sep 2, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
<quoted text>
Track Your Farts With an App - Fart Code
But out of the storm came one brave developer, who chose to add purpose to digital pooting: with the Fart Code app.
We knew that wearables could be way more fun
Fart Code, it turns out, is more of an analyzer than a toy. It uses your iPhone’s camera to scan the barcodes of food products. It then checks the ingredients and tells the user what kind of fart it will likely produce, and what’s in the food that causes it. Types of farts are ranked on a scale from “Stinky” to “Toxic,” and the ingredients are explained.
"We scanned a bottle of hickory-flavored barbecue sauce and were surprised to get a “Gross” fart rating, with the culprit ingredient being fructose"
This app is the best.
Kieth

Cypress, TX

#80 Sep 2, 2014
Flatulence Fred wrote:
Flatulence-free belly: Six foods for a hap. py belly
If you are suffering from flatulence or bloating due to too much gas in your stomach, you are in the right place because this article will give you some examples of foods that are less likely to cause flatulence. It does not only make you feel uncomfortable, but it can also be embarrassing if you release gas in a crowd, especially if it is loud and smelly.
Most articles focus on the list of foods that causes flatulence. These are foods that have high carbohydrate contents, especially when they are not properly chewed and digested. However, it may be impossible to avoid all these foods because most of the nutritious foods that your body requires can cause flatulence. What you can do instead is to focus on the foods that are less likely to cause flatulence. Here are six food groups that you can eat without worrying about suffering from flatulence.
1. Non-gassy proteins
Foods that are rich in protein do not really cause flatulence, except when they are not properly chewed and digested. There are some protein-rich foods that do not give off too much gas like grass fed lean beef, white meat like chicken and turkey, hard cheese, peanut butter, fish, and eggs. These foods are not only stomach-friendly. They are also good for people who are on a diet.
2. Vegetables with low carbohydrates
The main culprit as to why people suffer from stomach gas problems is carbohydrates. This is why it is important to eat low carbohydrate foods like low carbohydrate vegetables since you cannot completely avoid carbohydrates in your diet. Some examples of carbohydrates are carrots, celery, cucumber, fennel, eggplant, green beans, herbs, greens, mushrooms, okra, pumpkin, radicchio, scallions, snow peas, tomatoes, zucchini, chives, and peppers.
3. Fruits with low sugar content
Sugars found in fruits are known to cause flatulence. This type of sugar is called fructose. What you can do is to eat fruits with low sugar content like apples, certain berries, apricots, guavas, melons, grapefruit, pears, peaches, papayas, lime, lemon, plums, kiwis, watermelons, and nectarines. It is better to eat these fruits raw. Canned fruits may have additional sugar content that may cause bloating and flatulence.
4. Wheat alternatives
Wheat is difficult to digest, which is why it is one of the main causes of flatulence. You can still enjoy bread, pasta, and other foods by using wheat alternatives like corn, rice, millet, and wild rice. You can also use quinoa flour for baking bread and nut meal for cookies and cakes. Instead of choosing pasta made of wheat, you can use pasta that comes from rice, corn, or quinoa flour.
5. Dairy substitutes
Lactose is another form of sugar that can cause discomfort to your stomach. You can eat dairy substitutes made from soya like cheese, yogurts, and desserts; milk made from oat, almond, rice, and soya; and yeast flakes.
6. Avocado, humus, tahini, and guacamole
For sandwich spreads and salad dressings, you can use these foods that do not cause flatulence. They are also healthier than other kinds of spreads and dressings.
Sapp stated that avocado would make him fart worse than califlower

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