When Is Spanking Child Abuse?

When Is Spanking Child Abuse?

There are 79 comments on the New York Times story from Oct 21, 2008, titled When Is Spanking Child Abuse?. In it, New York Times reports that:

A hearing is underway in a Wisconsin courtroom , for Barry Barnett, a 43-year-old pastor.

Join the discussion below, or Read more at New York Times.

spikewebb

Trimble, MO

#21 Jul 26, 2009
Jennie wrote:
If you cannot think of any other way to punish a child other than hitting, you should not be left alone with a child.
that's what's wrong with some of the kids today,they needed spanked and their parents did not do it,so they grow up to be trouble makers.nothing wrong with a good spanking
Oscar

Las Vegas, NV

#22 Jul 26, 2009
It's ONLY child Abuse when you use a red hot fireplace poker to spank with. Wait til it cools first.

“Everything I am.”

Since: Jul 09

Los Angeles (Lynwood).

#23 Jul 27, 2009
Spanking is not child abuse. I honestly believe spanking (open hand on the butt) is suitable for age appropriate children, in given circumstances. Using a paddle or a belt or any object I believe is inappropriate. No parent should leave a mark on a child, the act of spanking should not be practiced to cause pain to any child; however to discipline and show that child that whatever they may have done is wrong.
Gretchen

Elk Grove, CA

#24 Jul 27, 2009
fr goodxbuddy:

>Spanking is not child abuse...<

It most certainly IS. Grow UP and get a life.
frank

United States

#25 Jul 27, 2009
it's child abused whe the kid can't sit down for a week.
meanwhile 10 hard spanking with a belt on your bottom is ok.

Since: Feb 07

Location hidden

#26 Jul 28, 2009
Gretchen wrote:
fr goodxbuddy:
>Spanking is not child abuse...<
It most certainly IS. Grow UP and get a life.
Grow up and get a life? That's your argument? How about parents grow a spine and stop letting your kids do anything they want? How about parents get informed and learn that young kids don't understand, or respond to, long lectures or explanations about their behavior? When a kid is acting up the parents will sit there and lecture about why Junior should stop misbehaving, but Junior stopped listening after the first few seconds. A boring lecture that they don't understand is no deterrent for bad behavior.

Too many parents find it acceptable to allow their kids to run wild and act up in any setting, and much of the time it's either pure laziness or the parent is completely clueless about discipline. Consequently, the rest of us can't go anywhere, restaurants, libraries, stores, coffee shops, etc, without having to put up with screaming, tantruming, out-of-control brats.
Kelly

Daphne, AL

#27 Jul 28, 2009
Spanking isn't child abuse any more than surgery is stabbing...

Children in this generation are not afraid of consequences - you can see that by the disrespect for authority and the jails being full. They have no cause and affect thinking. My children are spanked and as far as the red marks - hey, sometimes that happens. It isn't supposed to feel good and if done in the proper way is effective. Its the creeps that hit on the head, arms and legs that give spanking a bad name.

“Everything I am.”

Since: Jul 09

Los Angeles (Lynwood).

#28 Jul 28, 2009
Gretchen wrote:
fr goodxbuddy:
>Spanking is not child abuse...<
It most certainly IS. Grow UP and get a life.
Gretchen, In California spanking is not child abuse so long as no marks or bruises are left behind. Using an object like a belt or paddle and leaving marks is abuse. Using an object to spank and even if you leave no marks it is intent to cause harm to the child so its technically wrong, but an open hand on the butt is not abusive, its called discipline i believe and kids these days need a spankings now and then (open hand on the butt)... and i am grown (i have three little ones at home)...

Since: Feb 07

Location hidden

#29 Jul 28, 2009
Kelly wrote:
Spanking isn't child abuse any more than surgery is stabbing...
Children in this generation are not afraid of consequences - you can see that by the disrespect for authority and the jails being full. They have no cause and affect thinking. My children are spanked and as far as the red marks - hey, sometimes that happens. It isn't supposed to feel good and if done in the proper way is effective. Its the creeps that hit on the head, arms and legs that give spanking a bad name.
My own parents spanked us, it was common when I was a kid, and my parents were both decent people with values and high moral standards. We had consequences for bad bahavior. My dad stopped us with just looks because we knew he would back them up with action. Today parents "discuss" and talk things out to kids who aren't capable of listening and comprehending all that lecturing. What kid is afraid of being lectured? What kid is afraid of consequences from a parent who does nothing? Or worse yet, a parent who will make excuses for him?
gump

Auburn, ME

#30 Jul 28, 2009
Jennie wrote:
If you cannot think of any other way to punish a child other than hitting, you should not be left alone with a child.
When all other attempts fail ITS the hickory stick JUST a point saying a spanking is needed

Since: Jul 09

Location hidden

#31 Jul 28, 2009
Republican voter wrote:
Spanking is far from child abuse, its disipline thats all that is
i think every kid needs to be spank if they do something wrong so they learn not to do it again

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#32 Jul 28, 2009
This kid learned a valuable lesson, didn't he? He knows that lying is wrong and next time will think twice before doing it. Looks like the punishment brought about the desired results. Look at most of the brats being raised these days because their parents would never touch the little angels. Then again, many of those parents were brought up the same way. It's easy to see that people continue to get worse without proper discipline early on. All three of my daughters received spankings when they were young as did I from my father, and none of us are worse off for it. Isnít it amazing that I love and respect my dad and my daughters feel the same about me, not at all? This young man loves and respects his dad also, because the dad took the time to explain why he was getting paddled and took a real interest in bringing up a respectful, honest young man. That is something drastically lacking today. It's time the state and bleeding hearts shut up and stay out of good parents business.

Since: Feb 07

Location hidden

#33 Jul 29, 2009
How I See It wrote:
This kid learned a valuable lesson, didn't he? He knows that lying is wrong and next time will think twice before doing it. Looks like the punishment brought about the desired results. Look at most of the brats being raised these days because their parents would never touch the little angels. Then again, many of those parents were brought up the same way. It's easy to see that people continue to get worse without proper discipline early on. All three of my daughters received spankings when they were young as did I from my father, and none of us are worse off for it. Isnít it amazing that I love and respect my dad and my daughters feel the same about me, not at all? This young man loves and respects his dad also, because the dad took the time to explain why he was getting paddled and took a real interest in bringing up a respectful, honest young man. That is something drastically lacking today. It's time the state and bleeding hearts shut up and stay out of good parents business.
Exactly!
Gretchen

United States

#34 Jul 31, 2009
fr steve:

>I can tell you spanking worked on and my brothers as a kid and I spank my 2 1/2 year old son now when he disobeys. It works for me,...<

Yeah, it lets you "think" that you're some big strong "man" who BEATS his toddler. I have immense sympathy for your child. Get some help to get you to stop BEATING your child.

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#35 Jul 31, 2009
Gretchen wrote:
fr steve:
>I can tell you spanking worked on and my brothers as a kid and I spank my 2 1/2 year old son now when he disobeys. It works for me,...<
Yeah, it lets you "think" that you're some big strong "man" who BEATS his toddler. I have immense sympathy for your child. Get some help to get you to stop BEATING your child.
Grow up. If not, please don't have children. We have enough brats in this world already.
Tommy

Chicago, IL

#36 Jul 31, 2009
I am 13 years old. And I still receive a bare spanking with my father belt.
FussBack

Sherman Oaks, CA

#37 Jul 31, 2009
Kudos to the DAD
Gretchen

Phoenix, AZ

#38 Aug 2, 2009
fr Tommy:

>I am 13 years old. And I still receive a bare spanking with my father belt.<

You are being abused by being beaten with a belt. There IS help available to you through your school.

Since: Jun 09

Location hidden

#39 Aug 2, 2009
Gretchen wrote:
fr Tommy:
>I am 13 years old. And I still receive a bare spanking with my father belt.<
You are being abused by being beaten with a belt. There IS help available to you through your school.
No, he's not.
Sam

Randolph, WI

#40 Aug 3, 2009
I think Gretchen has some displaced anger toward someone from her past that may have went overboard with their discipline. If you spank the correct way with a balance of discipline, love and respect then that child will not feel abused - they will grow up very thankful that their parents cared enough about them to not let them grow up to be inconsiderate freeloaders of society. What about it Gretch? Maybe you need some inner therepy to work on things.

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