Sexist Jokes About Men

[The Zone]

Sexist Jokes About Men. One one or to about women!.

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What do you call a pig crossed with a woman :

a man!

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Ben was setting his friend Anthony up for a blind date with his friend Susan "If she's ugly just pretend to have an asthma attack" said Ben. Anthony went to pick up Susan at her house and was stunned at how gorgeous she was.

Then Susan started going "AUUGGHHHH!"

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How many men does it take to open a beer?

None.

It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb?

None.

Let the wife cook in the dark.
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What are the three fastest means of communication?

1) Internet 2) Telephone 3) Telawoman!

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What is 6" long, has a head on it and drives women crazy?

A Fifftey Pound Note!£50

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How can you tell if a woman has an orgasm?

Who cares?

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Why do women fake orgasms?

They think we care.

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Why do women like intelligent men?

Opposites attract.

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What do you call an intelligent woman in America?

A tourist.

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Some mornings I wake up grouchy... and some mornings I just let her sleep!

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How many men does it take to mop a floor?

None.

It's a woman's job.

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A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive?

She's a woman!
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How is marriage like a hot bath?

Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.

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Wife: "The two things I cook best are meatloaf and apple pie."
Husband:

"Which is this?"

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A businessman, an intelligent woman, and the Easter Bunny get into an elevator. There is a $10 note lying on the ground. Who picks it up?

The businessman; the other two don't exist!

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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?

A woman that won't do what she's told!

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The Zone

[Nicholas]

What is with these stupid jokes and they are suppose to sound sexy. My grandma can make up better jokes than these

[handsome aare]

i really love that, a questionnaire and intelligent supplier

[handsome aare]

I REALLY LIKE THIS: ITS INTERESTING
Sexist Jokes About Men. One one or to about women!.

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

What do you call a pig crossed with a woman :

a man!

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

Ben was setting his friend Anthony up for a blind date with his friend Susan "If she's ugly just pretend to have an asthma attack" said Ben. Anthony went to pick up Susan at her house and was stunned at how gorgeous she was.

Then Susan started going "AUUGGHHHH!"

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

How many men does it take to open a beer?

None.

It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

How many men does it take to change a light bulb?

None.

Let the wife cook in the dark.
<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

What are the three fastest means of communication?

1) Internet 2) Telephone 3) Telawoman!

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

What is 6" long, has a head on it and drives women crazy?

A Fifftey Pound Note!£50

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

How can you tell if a woman has an orgasm?

Who cares?

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

Why do women fake orgasms?

They think we care.

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

Why do women like intelligent men?

Opposites attract.

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

What do you call an intelligent woman in America?

A tourist.

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

Some mornings I wake up grouchy... and some mornings I just let her sleep!

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>
How many men does it take to mop a floor?

None.

It's a woman's job.

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

Why can't Helen Keller drive?

She's a woman!
<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

How is marriage like a hot bath?

Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

Wife: "The two things I cook best are meatloaf and apple pie."
Husband:

"Which is this?"

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

A businessman, an intelligent woman, and the Easter Bunny get into an elevator. There is a $10 note lying on the ground. Who picks it up?

The businessman; the other two don't exist!

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?

A woman that won't do what she's told!

<> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <> ooooo <> <>

The Zone

[Tami]

Ummm. I thought these were all about men...

[imatruthaddict]

Ahh Tami you were tricked into it...haha

[Da zone]

Lets just turn the table on him. Just replace the he with a she! Ha ha
How many woman does it take to mop a floor? None it's a males job. Take that!!

[Politix]

There are only two things my wife doesn't like about me - everything I say and everything I do!

With her, it's not about my "junk," it's the cute way I get on and off.

She wants to be a magician but the only act she has is to cross and uncross her legs and make the refrigerator light go on and off.

Can she cook? The only thing she's ever made for dinner were reservations.

She did try to make lunch one time, but the EPA shut her down. Something about creating a toxic waste site.