memo to david letterman: presidential scandals make great comedy

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“Hereeeeee'ssss UR Pizza”

Since: May 13

Columbus, OH

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#1
May 24, 2013
 
While Jay Leno continues to joke about President Barack Obama's scandals in the proper fashion, the writers over at The Late Show with David Letterman are still perplexed.
Since Iím always willing to assist struggling comics, I went back into the archives and pulled this Top Ten list from November 14, 1973. Some of the jokes seem so fresh, they could have been written yesterday:

Top Ten Things Overheard on the White House tapes:

10. Theyíll never impeach me, have you met my Vice President?
9. My Attorney General is prepared to lie like a cheerleader on her wedding night.
8. Well, if they didnít want a crook for President, they shouldnít have re-elected me.
7. Itís just because they just canít stand a Quaker in the White House
6. No time for a subpoena, Iíve got a Three OíClock tee time.
5. Tell my wife if she doesnít pipe down, Iím going to fix HER leaks.
4. Why not throw me in jail, thatís where all my campaign contributors are.
3. One more peep out of Woodward, and the IRS is going to be auditing his prostate.
2. Itís getting desperate, George Bush is asking ME to resign.
1. You may need to call a plumber for that, Dick

“Hereeeeee'ssss UR Pizza”

Since: May 13

Columbus, OH

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#2
May 24, 2013
 
by TIM SLAGLE
They cannot kill a spook

Clayton, MI

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#3
May 25, 2013
 
Free Pizza 4 U wrote:
by TIM SLAGLE
The difference is Letterman campaigned for Obama a democrat.

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