Russian girl survives awful first ado...

Russian girl survives awful first adoption to find love in a ne...

There are 58 comments on the Columbus Dispatch story from Apr 26, 2010, titled Russian girl survives awful first adoption to find love in a ne.... In it, Columbus Dispatch reports that:

Irina Palmer, 10, survived her experience with her first adoptive parents, Gary and Amy Thompson, but her adoptive brother, Liam, did not.

Join the discussion below, or Read more at Columbus Dispatch.

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Neocon Without a Party

Saint Louis, MO

#46 Apr 26, 2010
Torch that POS and his wife.
THETRUTH

Sidney, OH

#47 Apr 26, 2010
I could not imagine a more painful death than to be severely burned then put on my back to writhe in pain for days until I died.....I can only hope the prisoners get to this "person" and exact some revenge....The American justice system will just him 3 hots and a cot...plus a TV and library....The fact this guy is breathing the same air as me makes me sick....
ShamWow

Columbus, OH

#48 Apr 26, 2010
Ashes82 wrote:
<quoted text>
What????
You seem to know about prison justice. I thought maybe you had done some time yourself?
MEME

Beckley, WV

#49 Apr 26, 2010
MAY GOD KEEP BLESSING YOUR FAMILY AND MY THE ANGLES PROTECT MORE CHILDREN THAT DO NOT HAVE THEIR OWN HOMES AND THE PEOPLE TAHT TAKE CARE OF THEM
upset

West Mansfield, OH

#50 Apr 26, 2010
Not a Buckeye wrote:
I agree the Thompsons should be put in scalding water and left to die. What horrible people they are.
What I don't understand is why, with so many homeless neglected children in the USA why people have to go to Russia or China to adopt.
Everyone wants abortion to be a crime, but few adopt the unwanted children here.
Why is that?
Have you tried an adoption here? Unfortunately it isn't that easy.
Reader

Columbus, OH

#51 Apr 26, 2010
upset wrote:
<quoted text>
Have you tried an adoption here? Unfortunately it isn't that easy.
As an adoptive parent, let me say, raising kids is not easy. By comparison, the adoption process is a piece of cake. International adoption, as a process, is certainly no easier than domestic adoption. People choose one over the other for many reasons, some altruistic, some practical, some illusional. When it works well, adoption is about finding a good match between a child and a family. But in all cases (just as with biological children) there are lots and lots of unknowns--and no guarantees.
Observer

Miami Beach, FL

#52 Apr 26, 2010
Domestic adoption gives you more information about the child in regards to family history such as drug, alcohol usage any know information about both sides of the family and what the child has been through since coming into the custody of agency. International adoption tells you the child was dropped off at the orphanage period. There have been successful international adoptions with great results, and the adoptive families are great people. But there are some that slip through the homestudy process just like natural parents who shouldn't be parents. My hat is off to all adoptive parents to take any child in and give their love.
Outraged

Columbus, OH

#53 Apr 27, 2010
upset wrote:
<quoted text>
Have you tried an adoption here? Unfortunately it isn't that easy.
It may be harder to adopt here in the US but there may be reasons behind it. These people probably tried to adopt in the US but they have standards on who should be fit enough to raise children and they were denied for good reasons.
MomToFour

Galloway, OH

#54 Apr 27, 2010
For all of those that are preaching "save the US children first", I trust you all have applications in for foster or adoption with Franklin County Children's Services? Or is it just adoptive parents' jobs to save the country's children while everyone else closes their eyes and pretends that it isn't their problem?

Seriously, folks, get off your high horse. As a biological mother to three children (one deceased) and an adoptive mother to a special needs child from Vietnam, it is extremely offensive to hear that it is my job to "save" the children "here" from people who haven't even once considered adoption on fostering. There are many reasons we chose to go international, and none of them are your concern. But, we also do many things to help the children in our own country. So, before you preach about how my family should be created, consider practicing what you preach and let people make their own choices for their families. It's not our job to "fix" everything while you preach from your pulpit. And, fwiw, we weren't denied the ability to adopt from the US. We were qualified for multiple countries, INCLUDING the US.

As for the article, I am so glad to see that this sweet young lady has found a family that will love and traesure her. My Vietnamese-born daughter has a diagnosis of Reactive Attachment Disorder, which is an extremely difficult diagnosis to work with, but there is nothing in the world that would make us give up our little girl or worse. Every child deserves a family that loves them, and I'm glad this young lady has finally gotten it. I am devistated that it is too late for her brother.
There but for Gods grace

Columbus, OH

#55 Apr 27, 2010
The voice of experience beats the voice of self-righteous indignation every time. Thanks MomToFour for making the most intelligent comments, rooted in experience. Did it occur to anyone that if the first family were really "monsters" they probably wouldn't have gone halfway around the world to take on parenting two young children at once? I don't know these parents' story and I think they deserve prison for Liam's horrible death, but readers should learn that post-adoption depression is common, like post-partum depression. And toddlers seldom are placed for adoption simply because they are orphaned when loving parents get killed in a car crash or something. They need adoption because they have already been badly hurt,emotionally, by poor pre-natal care, serious neglect, abuse, etc. Liam's parents failed him terribly. Clearly they had an obligation to seek professional help if they were overwhelmed. But readers: until you've walked in their shoes and adopted two hurt children at once, have the humility to assume there's more to the story than you will ever understand.
adoptivefamily in Gahanna

Lewis Center, OH

#56 Apr 27, 2010
Alex wrote:
These people went to Russia to adopt, BECAUSE they were obviously not QUALIFIED for any LEGAL AMERICAN adoption.
Was there any kind of vetting process??? My guess is no...The Russian adoption agencies are nothing but child warehouses....the kids each get a number and YOU get what ever number is next.
Sad
We adopted two children from Russia 15 months ago. People adopt internationally for a lot of reasons and few of them have to do with not being able to adopt legally in the U.S. For us, it was a chance to give a home, love, and hope to children who had absolutely no chance otherwise. There was a vetting process, extensive paperwork, criminal background checks, reports from our local police department about us, home inspections (ongoing), social worker visits, mandatory training about adopted kids from other countries and their problems, not to mention the over $50K in costs. It took us nearly two years to complete. It was hard and the first 6 months after we had the kids home was the hardest thing we've ever done (even though we were already experienced parents). It takes time to learn to become a family and to trust and love each other.

Don't condmemn adoptive families for the actions of these monsters. Sympathize with the struggles that we all go through and support those with the love, patience, and strength to give a home to a child in need.
JDD

Columbus, OH

#58 Apr 29, 2010
This story is so heart breaking to me.
I am happy for this little girl that she has a loving family God Bless these people for being loving people. But I cannot get this out of my mind that this little boy was 3 yrs old and burned and left alone to die OMG.
I hope these 2 NEVER get out of jail.
They should of got the death penalty.
Really

Columbus, OH

#59 Apr 29, 2010
AMEN!- Thank you MomToFour! Time for the rest of you to come down off your high horses. Better yet, tell that pregnant teen in your neighborhood you will adopt her baby because you are mentally stable and financially able to provide a LOVING home and pay all of the birth costs and take however many more she decides to have.
MomToFour wrote:
For all of those that are preaching "save the US children first", I trust you all have applications in for foster or adoption with Franklin County Children's Services? Or is it just adoptive parents' jobs to save the country's children while everyone else closes their eyes and pretends that it isn't their problem?
Seriously, folks, get off your high horse. As a biological mother to three children (one deceased) and an adoptive mother to a special needs child from Vietnam, it is extremely offensive to hear that it is my job to "save" the children "here" from people who haven't even once considered adoption on fostering. There are many reasons we chose to go international, and none of them are your concern. But, we also do many things to help the children in our own country. So, before you preach about how my family should be created, consider practicing what you preach and let people make their own choices for their families. It's not our job to "fix" everything while you preach from your pulpit. And, fwiw, we weren't denied the ability to adopt from the US. We were qualified for multiple countries, INCLUDING the US.
As for the article, I am so glad to see that this sweet young lady has found a family that will love and traesure her. My Vietnamese-born daughter has a diagnosis of Reactive Attachment Disorder, which is an extremely difficult diagnosis to work with, but there is nothing in the world that would make us give up our little girl or worse. Every child deserves a family that loves them, and I'm glad this young lady has finally gotten it. I am devistated that it is too late for her brother.
Dad

Elizabethtown, PA

#60 May 14, 2010
upset wrote:
<quoted text>
Have you tried an adoption here? Unfortunately it isn't that easy.
We adopted two kids from US foster care. No adoption (domestic or foreign) is "easy" - nor should it be. But there are additional risks when adopting internationally, especially from Eastern Europe. I am simply amazed at prospective adoptive parents who want to adopt overseas because the big bad biological family might resurface one day. Embrace your adopted child's biological heritage - and that includes their original families. It's not about you.

Dad
Dad

Elizabethtown, PA

#61 May 14, 2010
Top Ten Reasons Not To Adopt Internationally

1) Because you can.
2) To put an ocean between your adopted child and their big bad biological family.
3) Expense. I'm not impressed with your $50K. Neither will your child be.
4) Graft, corruption, and bribery. Remember to take thousands in untraceable CASH.
5) Incomplete and missing medical histories that need loose translation into English.
6) Third world child traffickers. Was your child willingly and legally given up for adoption? Don't bet your life on it.
7) Culture. Would you be willing to relocate to a strange culture with new language/customs in a foreign land? You're asking your child to. Maybe you should move instead.
8) Corrupt and unregulated international adoption agencies. Can you spell O-r-s-o-n-M-o-s-e-s?
9) 120,000 legally free children waiting to be adopted in our foster care system. Think globally - act locally.
10) To avoid the foster child from hell. Every institutionalized child will come with emotional and/or physical baggage. Children from overseas are no different.

I know lots of good parents who have adopted overseas. Their children are precious to them. But do it for the right reasons, or don't do it at all.

Dad
workingdadof7

Philo, OH

#62 May 14, 2010
Dad wrote:
Top Ten Reasons Not To Adopt Internationally
1) Because you can.
2) To put an ocean between your adopted child and their big bad biological family.
3) Expense. I'm not impressed with your $50K. Neither will your child be.
4) Graft, corruption, and bribery. Remember to take thousands in untraceable CASH.
5) Incomplete and missing medical histories that need loose translation into English.
6) Third world child traffickers. Was your child willingly and legally given up for adoption? Don't bet your life on it.
7) Culture. Would you be willing to relocate to a strange culture with new language/customs in a foreign land? You're asking your child to. Maybe you should move instead.
8) Corrupt and unregulated international adoption agencies. Can you spell O-r-s-o-n-M-o-s-e-s?
9) 120,000 legally free children waiting to be adopted in our foster care system. Think globally - act locally.
10) To avoid the foster child from hell. Every institutionalized child will come with emotional and/or physical baggage. Children from overseas are no different.
I know lots of good parents who have adopted overseas. Their children are precious to them. But do it for the right reasons, or don't do it at all.
Dad
A child is a child and needs love too.Wether they are from here or "there"
Irina Palmer

Circleville, OH

#63 Oct 17, 2013
Thank you so much for the wonderful comments it really means a lot
Irina Palmer

Circleville, OH

#64 Oct 17, 2013
Thank you so much this really means a lot to me I am so thankful that there are nice people in this world thank u so much!!!!

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