I will pray for you. You have a good heart to even ask that Jesus help you find the right path. That shows me he is speaking to your heart and you are listening. You deserve to live a good life. Keep praying. Jesus will help you find the right way if you ask and you will be much happier. It may be tough at first, but there is a lot of help out there for you to get on the right path. I will help if you would like.i was going the run way also but jesus help me to find the rigth way.
The life I have read about on this site is very discusting.
I am proud you have made the first step. Ask Jesus to forgive your sins and ask him into your heart and he will not forsake you. Trust me please.