Young women with much older men

Young women with much older men

Posted in the Willisburg Forum

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Sue

Harrodsburg, KY

#1 Sep 6, 2010
I have a daughter in her early twenties who "dates" a man in his late forties. She insists there is nothing wrong with it. He does seem to be good to her but I still can't help but think there must be something wrong with him to want to be with someone so young and inexperienced in life. I am trying to be open minded and not an old fashioned prude...but am having a hard time. Constructive comments please!

Since: Sep 10

Lawrenceburg, KY

#2 Sep 6, 2010
I'm married to a man 10 yrs my senior. It works for us. We never fight and are completely and totally in love. Thats not to say we don't have our disagreements. But we understand that if were angry, walk away. If we need to come to an understanding, talk about it. And never ever say something just to be mean.

Our differences balance us out. Opposites attract right. We've been married for almost 13 years now. I couldn't be happier with my marriage. We have one daughter whose 8 and she is our world. My mother was like you at first. Especially since I was 15 when we started dating. It could have turned out really bad for him, but with my mothers permission, we took that chance and ended up with a happily ever after. Don't judge just based on his age. Judge based on his character.
been there

Harrodsburg, KY

#3 Sep 6, 2010
I don't want to start this out as critical, but I have to ask....Is her dad in her life? I say that only because often it's said that a younger girl with an older man means seeking someone to be a father figure or someone to give the approval that she didn't receive from her father.

Sad for me to say but I did this very same thing. My dad wasn't in my life and I have dated a couple men much older than me. It's not going to harm her, let her grow and realize this herself, would be my advise
Sue

Harrodsburg, KY

#4 Sep 6, 2010
No, unfortunately, her dad has not been there for her. She last saw him when she was about 8 years old. Serious drug and alcohol issues. I have often felt that she was looking for a father figure as well. Although, she totally disagrees! I don't think it would bother me as much if it were only ten years difference or so, but I am talking about 25 years difference. The man is my age!!!
too old

Chicago, IL

#6 Sep 6, 2010
A 20 something dating a late forty something will never work long term. Example: Don and Lana Peach.
Simple

Lawrenceburg, KY

#7 Sep 6, 2010
Daddy issues.
End of thread.
Trish

Harrodsburg, KY

#8 Sep 6, 2010
I agree with ya. I think there is something not quite right about a man almost 50 wanting a twenty something. Probably likes the fact that she has little or no experience with men, life, sex, etc...has nothing to compare him with.
My thoughts on this

Nicholasville, KY

#9 Sep 7, 2010
I also think it is a control issue. These men treat these women like their daughters. They have complete contol and the young women go along with it just like they would their dad. In most cases, they are totally dependent on the man.
Yep

United States

#10 Sep 7, 2010
When you really think about it relationships like this have been going on for a long time. It is not a new phenomenon. My grand father was twenty years older than my grand mother and my father-in-law is 85 and mother-in-law is 61. My grandparents were married for 49 years before he passed and my in-laws will have been together 40 years in November. I think it can work if they have genuine love for one another and don't pay attention to the naysayers.
Agree

Lawrenceburg, KY

#11 Sep 7, 2010
I agree with yep! Love just happens weather it's with a obese person or a forigen person or with a older or younger person! If it makes ya happy then go for it u r living ur life not someone elses!
Step back_open your mind

Henderson, KY

#12 Sep 7, 2010
Sue wrote:
I have a daughter in her early twenties who "dates" a man in his late forties. She insists there is nothing wrong with it. He does seem to be good to her but I still can't help but think there must be something wrong with him to want to be with someone so young and inexperienced in life. I am trying to be open minded and not an old fashioned prude...but am having a hard time. Constructive comments please!
As a woman who is very happily married to a man 27 years my senior, all I can tell you is step back and see the dynamics of their relationship. Keep an open mind. The May / December romances don't work for everyone, but the do for quite a few. Does he treat her well? Are they partners, or is it more like he's the master (or is she)? Is there mutual respect?
My husband is my best friend as well as my chosen life partner. He is older than my parents. Before all you naysayers jump in and say 'daddy issues', I had a wonderful childhood and my parents are still happily married after nearly 40 years. I was not seeking my husband, we happened to meet. I was not physically attracted to him initially, but I fell in love with his personality and his outlook on life. He is everything I ever thought a man should be, and more. I am grateful that I didn't let our huge age difference get in the way of our relationship, because I would have missed out on a lot of happiness and growth.
I am not in my twenties. I'm closer to 40, but the advice remains, step back and look at the dynamics, then decide if it's a healthy relationship. You won't change it either way, but maybe you can offer some CALM advice. She might take it.
truth

Olive Hill, KY

#13 Sep 7, 2010
it's down right disgusting that's what it is. if he was a real man he could hold a conversation with a woman is own age. sounds like a relationship built on convienence.
Lawrenceburg opinion

Lawrenceburg, KY

#14 Sep 13, 2010
Shame there is still bigotry of anykind in todyas world if its you dont knock it. I know good relationships like this on both sides I know several men whose wives are 110 to 20 years lder than them and they have wonderful marriages.

Since: Sep 10

Location hidden

#15 Sep 13, 2010
I love older men, young ones too!
Love my hubby

United States

#16 Sep 14, 2010
I am in my 20's and I am married to a man that is in his 40's. We have been married for 7 yrs now, we love each other very much. The thing is there is not one person in this entire world that has a "perfect" marriage, it takes work just like everything else in life. My Mom and Dad like to have had a heart attack when I told them, but now my family loves him and respects him. Try to keep an open mind because relationships/marriages do work when there is a big age difference. Good Luck!:)
Newspaper

Finchville, KY

#17 Jun 13, 2013
too old wrote:
A 20 something dating a late forty something will never work long term. Example: Don and Lana Peach.
A money hungry H000
Wow

Lawrenceburg, KY

#18 Jun 13, 2013
Your talking about Tiffany aren't you? What's wrong with that girl
gross

Lawrenceburg, KY

#19 Jun 14, 2013
Hey. If she likes wrinkly old bag o balls and waiting on the time to collect death ins money, whats wrong with that? She"ll fit in with SOME of the others around here. You know the ones, sit on the butts all day having others or the state take care of them. You know, expect the world to owe them everything just because they breath air. That little blue pill has been helping the elderly get young booty for a while now. In a way it's like being a prostitute, give them what they want now and they pay later. LAYaway booty plan!
Steph

Chicago, IL

#20 Jun 14, 2013
Wats the issue with a young girl an older man? My man is 23 years older than me? We're happy been together almost 2 years an he dnt control me. What so ever! An my dad was there all my life. My mother was never there!
maybe

Taylorsville, KY

#21 Jul 9, 2013
Maybe these girls date older men because they actually want a relationship not a babysitting job! These boys now days are awful and have no respect for women thanks to media and bad parenting. Females do not want a man that they have to provide for and basically fill in for his momma. Men grow up already!

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