Ethnic couples face difficulty finding egg donors

Full story: Chicago Tribune

This Indian couple hasn't spoken about it with family or friends, the choice they made after seven excruciating years of infertility.
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1 - 18 of 18 Comments Last updated Mar 14, 2011
kara

Elk Grove Village, IL

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#1
Feb 26, 2008
 
One word: ADOPT! There are children (who cares what ethnicity they are!) that desperately need loving families to call their own.
Chris

Urbana, IL

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#2
Feb 26, 2008
 
Given the number of children, many of the same race, bouncing in and out of foster care and looking for adoptive parents, the fact that this issue exists is saddening.
PB and E

Fishers, IN

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#3
Feb 26, 2008
 
Man, as a biracial child who has an adopted brother of another race this makes me sick. Am I truly supposed to feel sorry for someone who won't adopt or have a child of another ethnicity? Come on!!! If you can't love a child for who they are, then maybe it is best that you aren't a parent.
cosmo kramer

Hightstown, NJ

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#6
Feb 26, 2008
 
how selfish of Neetu and Rajiv! adopt for crissake! go to India to adopt if you're that hung up on ethnicity!
Karma Police

Chicago, IL

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#7
Feb 26, 2008
 
Sure. Adoption is certainly an option. A wonderful option at that. But it isn't for everyone. That in no way makes them selfish. They have the right to choose how they want to aquire a child. Geez. Lay off, people.
Renew egg donor program

Santa Ynez, CA

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#8
Feb 26, 2008
 
Thank you for the excellent article about the "hard to find" ethnic donors.
I wish I could have participated.
I have an egg donor program in South Africa, the Rainbow Nation. It is called this as it has all ethnicities.
We have Chinese, Muslim, black, Indian, European, Malaysian donors - you name it!
The Muslim women that donate say even though it is against their religion, they believe the right to bear children supersedes this.
Let me know if you want to do another article. We send infertile couples to Cape Town, South Africa from 15 countries now.

Kind regards, Robin

www.renewfertility.com
Robin Newman, director
stupid

United States

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#9
Feb 27, 2008
 
If you mix a caucasian egg with another ethnicity, it usually looks like a lighter version of the other ethnicity anyway, so just take the caucasian egg, mix it with your ethnic sperm and pipe down.
Suburban Mom

Maywood, IL

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#10
Feb 27, 2008
 

Judged:

1

I also do not understand looking for an Indian egg donor when the streets of India are filled with needy children. But being born and raised American, I can't understand their culture. For example, I have a friend who works at a children's hospital in Canada. Their city has a large Asian population. Many couples have arranged marriages, and sometimes first cousins marry. When they have kids with fatal problems, the genetic counselor advises them to go with adoption or egg/sperm donation next time. They just say "no, we'll try again". My friend does not even tell me the problems these poor babies have, because she said the descriptions would give me nightmares.
Too much emphasis on class/caste. Also I think they are used to seeing kids in abject poverty so they don't think about rescuing a baby from their home country. Newsweek had an article about midwives; in some parts of India, the lady who delivers your baby for 45 cents will break her neck for an additional dime if it's a girl. Then they say "stillborn" and move on. I cannot understand this "life is cheap" attitude. I feel very thankful to live in the US.
themadtrader

Frankfort, IL

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#11
Feb 27, 2008
 
Heaven forbid that one of these couples should raise a white child.
jjrg7

Washington, DC

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#12
Feb 27, 2008
 
Oh my gosh that break their neck for an additional dime just floored me.
Chris

Urbana, IL

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#13
Feb 28, 2008
 
Karma Police wrote:
Sure. Adoption is certainly an option. A wonderful option at that. But it isn't for everyone. That in no way makes them selfish. They have the right to choose how they want to aquire a child. Geez. Lay off, people.
Perhaps just a poor choice of words on your part, but using the term, "acquire" Seems to illustrate what many of us see as the problem here. We are talking about children, not pieces of property to "acquire" and try to make sure they are the correct model.
Burning down the house

Chicago, IL

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#14
Feb 28, 2008
 
Chris wrote:
<quoted text>
Perhaps just a poor choice of words on your part, but using the term, "acquire" Seems to illustrate what many of us see as the problem here. We are talking about children, not pieces of property to "acquire" and try to make sure they are the correct model.
You're right Chris. Definitely a poor choice of words....They have the right to choose how they want to bring a child into their family. I certainly meant no ill intent.
Sanjeev

Derry, UK

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#15
Apr 1, 2008
 
Since we are all human, what is wrong with a White egg or sperm. If that is the one most easily available, go for it.
Amy Smith

Miami, FL

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#16
Apr 3, 2008
 
kara wrote:
One word: ADOPT! There are children (who cares what ethnicity they are!) that desperately need loving families to call their own.
Adopting is not as easy as some people think. Because my husband is over 55 and I am 43 we have been turned down by agencies. Do your homework before you make a statement.

Since: Feb 08

Yorkville, IL

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#17
Apr 4, 2008
 
Amy Smith wrote:
<quoted text>
Adopting is not as easy as some people think. Because my husband is over 55 and I am 43 we have been turned down by agencies. Do your homework before you make a statement.
You shouldn't be allowed to adopt if you'll most likely be dead before the kid is old enough to drive.
Tertia Albertyn

South Africa

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#18
Apr 5, 2008
 
I am South African, based in Cape Town and as Robyn says above, we truly are a rainbow nation. We have egg donors from all ethnicities.

www.nurture.co.za
Tertia Albertyn
Cape Town, South Africa
baby2mom

Johannesburg, South Africa

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#19
May 29, 2008
 
Fertility issues really are very personal.

No one can deny any person the right to explore the beauty and possibility of pregnancy. If that is your inner needm then that is what you need to make your life whole.

Contact me on baby2mom@telkomsa.net. I can help you with an egg donor.

www.baby2mom.iblog.co.za
baby2mom egg donor recruitment programme
Want a baby too

San Francisco, CA

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#20
Mar 14, 2011
 
For all of you who have misconceptions about India and Indian people and their reluctance to adopt:
Regardless of ethnicity, I think any woman would love to go through the joys of pregnancy and feel in some way that she had contributed to her child.. I am not against adoption,but I feel every woman has the right to feel good about herself and see a reflection of herself in her baby... If a couple feels that they would rather give themselves time to fell that joy, its their decision altogether.. If they can't they will eventually adopt.. People who don't go through the trials of infertility diagnosis and the turmoil and shock that you can never have a baby will never understand what infertile couples go through...
@Suburban Mom : we are used to seeing poor kids in our country.. but that has nothing to do with not wanting your own children .. and there will always be exceptions and people who do cruel acts in any country.. nothing to do with general caste systems..nobody cares about these any more except in poor villages...

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