Why is marriage so hard now!!

Why is marriage so hard now!!

Posted in the Wayne Forum

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Quittingtime

Chesapeake, OH

#1 Jan 20, 2013
Something I can't understand. I work to provide she's not happy I'm gone to much she's unhappy if I don't work she's unhappy about not having the money to pay bills what the hello!!!!
FYI

Bluefield, WV

#2 Jan 20, 2013
Sounds like she is the one who needs to grow up, tell her to go get a job that will help occupy her time and now a days it takes both to work in order to make it. If she cant see that maybe you should get out now .
Talk it out

Logan, WV

#3 Jan 20, 2013
Talk to her, see what she's going through.

Here's some suggestions that could:

~Make a date night, once a week or so.(Doesn't even have to be going out or anything, light some candles, order something or make a home-made meal, soft music in the background, etc..)

~If you don't have any animals and are not allergic to them, buy her a puppy so that when you are gone she wont be alone. Even if you have Children, a puppy can make everyone happy.=D

~Once a month or so, buy her a rose or something sweet. Show her you care about her and that money isn't an object. Even if you buy a $0.50 rose it will still mean something.

~Have a family game/movie night.=) Just sit down and enjoy a movie or play some kind of board game. Make sure all computer's, cell phones, etc are off. You don't need any distractions. Well, keep one phone on in case of an emergency.

~A few times a week let her rest on the couch while you clean, make dinner, breakfast, etc.

~A suggestion from my Husband.....KISSIES!!!!

A marriage can be hard, but the good times can out weigh the bad. If all else fails, there's always Marriage Counselling.

Good luck to you both.=D
MeMe

Saint Albans, WV

#4 Jan 21, 2013
He works everyday but you say he should come home and let her sit and watch him cook and clean. What is her role in this marriage? If he has to do all of that, he don't need her.
Talk it out wrote:
Talk to her, see what she's going through.
Here's some suggestions that could:
~Make a date night, once a week or so.(Doesn't even have to be going out or anything, light some candles, order something or make a home-made meal, soft music in the background, etc..)
~If you don't have any animals and are not allergic to them, buy her a puppy so that when you are gone she wont be alone. Even if you have Children, a puppy can make everyone happy.=D
~Once a month or so, buy her a rose or something sweet. Show her you care about her and that money isn't an object. Even if you buy a $0.50 rose it will still mean something.
~Have a family game/movie night.=) Just sit down and enjoy a movie or play some kind of board game. Make sure all computer's, cell phones, etc are off. You don't need any distractions. Well, keep one phone on in case of an emergency.
~A few times a week let her rest on the couch while you clean, make dinner, breakfast, etc.
~A suggestion from my Husband.....KISSIES!!!!
A marriage can be hard, but the good times can out weigh the bad. If all else fails, there's always Marriage Counselling.
Good luck to you both.=D
Nonsense

Rupert, WV

#5 Jan 21, 2013
Quit your job and lay under her feet all day long, And also get you some ear plugs..Watch tv .mess up the kitchen & bathroom..And the most importance thing give her a BIG wet kiss on the cheek and say I luv you mom......Be prepared to get smacked down..
Quittingtime

Chesapeake, OH

#6 Jan 21, 2013
You know I've put everything into account about what you all have said. At times I feel wanted and other times I don't. I come home and hear how bad her day was at home being by herself and nothing is taken how bad my day went how tired I am how mentally and physically wore down I have become. At times I just want to give up but I keep on fighting for a better future. She don't have to work she has a new SUV credit cards money new home you name it but I'm never there.
no one

Smoot, WV

#7 Jan 21, 2013
Maybe the things that you buy and get her doesn't matter maybe she just wants you to spend time with her and show her you care. She sound different most women don't care if their husbands ever come home as long as they send the check.
supporter of domestic vio

United States

#8 Jan 21, 2013
punch that unappreciative bltch in her mouth for not showing you the proper respect.
Sassy

Huntington, WV

#9 Jan 21, 2013
Quittingtime wrote:
You know I've put everything into account about what you all have said. At times I feel wanted and other times I don't. I come home and hear how bad her day was at home being by herself and nothing is taken how bad my day went how tired I am how mentally and physically wore down I have become. At times I just want to give up but I keep on fighting for a better future. She don't have to work she has a new SUV credit cards money new home you name it but I'm never there.
If you really are wanting to make this work than here's my advice: Get her alone, really alone, no TV, no phone, no interruptions, even if you just take her for a drive and park somewhere (you probably did that when you were dating) and then just LISTEN, really listen to what she wants and needs. I can bet that the problem isn't really money at all. That may be part of it, because I know that being without it can be really tough. But if she knows that you care enough about her to try to understand how she feels you'd be surprised how much better she would feel. Sometimes a woman just needs to know that she's appreciated. Ex. Thank her for cooking you dinner (and take her out sometime if you can afford it). Thank her for keeping the house clean (assuming that she does). Thank her for washing your clothes - all the small things that she does. As a woman I can tell you that if she's home all day she does get lonely and will need some extra attention sometimes. Cuddle with her on the couch. It's all the small things that can make a big difference in a marriage. I say all of this because these are the things that I also need and want. Staying home all day is not as fun as everyone likes to think. If the husband comes home from work and she has made everything as comfortable as possible for him then he should recognize that. She knows that you work hard all day and I'm sure she appreciates that. If you started giving her this extra attention, you can bet that YOUR benefits would be even greater. Also, while you're having this discussion, tell her how you feel. I wish you the best of luck and hope things work out for you guys. Marriage is tough sometimes, but being alone and lonely is NOT a good alternative.
Talk it out

Logan, WV

#10 Jan 21, 2013
MeMe wrote:
He works everyday but you say he should come home and let her sit and watch him cook and clean. What is her role in this marriage? If he has to do all of that, he don't need her.
<quoted text>
You're taking what I said out of context. I said that a couple days out of the week, like if he isn't working, he should clean and take care of her.

Stop attempting to start an argument by twisting my words around. It will not work.
Talk it out

Logan, WV

#11 Jan 21, 2013
Sassy wrote:
<quoted text>If you really are wanting to make this work than here's my advice: Get her alone, really alone, no TV, no phone, no interruptions, even if you just take her for a drive and park somewhere (you probably did that when you were dating) and then just LISTEN, really listen to what she wants and needs. I can bet that the problem isn't really money at all. That may be part of it, because I know that being without it can be really tough. But if she knows that you care enough about her to try to understand how she feels you'd be surprised how much better she would feel. Sometimes a woman just needs to know that she's appreciated. Ex. Thank her for cooking you dinner (and take her out sometime if you can afford it). Thank her for keeping the house clean (assuming that she does). Thank her for washing your clothes - all the small things that she does. As a woman I can tell you that if she's home all day she does get lonely and will need some extra attention sometimes. Cuddle with her on the couch. It's all the small things that can make a big difference in a marriage. I say all of this because these are the things that I also need and want. Staying home all day is not as fun as everyone likes to think. If the husband comes home from work and she has made everything as comfortable as possible for him then he should recognize that. She knows that you work hard all day and I'm sure she appreciates that. If you started giving her this extra attention, you can bet that YOUR benefits would be even greater. Also, while you're having this discussion, tell her how you feel. I wish you the best of luck and hope things work out for you guys. Marriage is tough sometimes, but being alone and lonely is NOT a good alternative.
Basically what I said.=) Glad someone else on here knows what they are talking about.
Good day to you Ma'am.
Quittingtime

United States

#12 Jan 22, 2013
Thank you all for your advice. Ill use some of it. Again thank you.
compromise

Princeton, WV

#13 Jan 22, 2013
marriage is hard because you need to have a lot of give and take and compromise. so many ppl dont wanna give any and it makes it hard
mistake

Chesapeake, OH

#14 Jan 28, 2013
Divorce is expensive because its worth it.....run while u can
true

Princeton, WV

#15 Jan 29, 2013
Sassy wrote:
<quoted text>If you really are wanting to make this work than here's my advice: Get her alone, really alone, no TV, no phone, no interruptions, even if you just take her for a drive and park somewhere (you probably did that when you were dating) and then just LISTEN, really listen to what she wants and needs. I can bet that the problem isn't really money at all. That may be part of it, because I know that being without it can be really tough. But if she knows that you care enough about her to try to understand how she feels you'd be surprised how much better she would feel. Sometimes a woman just needs to know that she's appreciated. Ex. Thank her for cooking you dinner (and take her out sometime if you can afford it). Thank her for keeping the house clean (assuming that she does). Thank her for washing your clothes - all the small things that she does. As a woman I can tell you that if she's home all day she does get lonely and will need some extra attention sometimes. Cuddle with her on the couch. It's all the small things that can make a big difference in a marriage. I say all of this because these are the things that I also need and want. Staying home all day is not as fun as everyone likes to think. If the husband comes home from work and she has made everything as comfortable as possible for him then he should recognize that. She knows that you work hard all day and I'm sure she appreciates that. If you started giving her this extra attention, you can bet that YOUR benefits would be even greater. Also, while you're having this discussion, tell her how you feel. I wish you the best of luck and hope things work out for you guys. Marriage is tough sometimes, but being alone and lonely is NOT a good alternative.
this is the best advice you can get. ultimately, all a woman really wants is to feel important and appreciated.
Sassy

Ridgeview, WV

#16 Jan 29, 2013
It's very important to keep the fire burning in a marriage. I doubt there's a woman alive who does not crave passion. A marriage without passion is on a downward spiral. Take it from me because my own husband won't listen to me, so I'm left with giving my advice to others. He loves me, I'm sure, but there's a lot missing in our marriage that I wish I had. It's not rocket science, just plain good ole common sense.
true

Princeton, WV

#17 Jan 29, 2013
this is so true. men act like its so hard to figure women out and its actually so easy. We just want attention, come home from work, give us a kiss and hug, thank us for dinner, pinch our butt while we are washing dishes/cleaning, tell us how pretty we are. make us feel wanted, thats all we want. take us to dinner we dont even have to spend money doing things, just ask if we want to take a drive alone and drive around just talking. and dont make her think anything else is more important than her.listen up men because if you do these things you will get great results. lack of attention is a huge reason that people cheat.
net em all

Saint Albans, WV

#18 Jan 30, 2013
Jesus fing christ quit whining and find somebody else.
Todd

Chesapeake, OH

#19 Feb 2, 2013
I think i know who started this post . First of all your wife is cheating on you with me. Its just sex i am not looking for nothing more. She is bored with you and needs something more at this point in her life
Sassy

Gordon, WV

#20 Feb 4, 2013
net em all wrote:
Jesus fing christ quit whining and find somebody else.
Oh yeah, just a few more things: First - Whine, Whine, Whine. Second - you should be ashamed of yourself for using the Lord's name in vain. Third - I think I'll keep what I've got just in case I should ever be so unfortunate to end up someone like you.

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