Joker

Van Wert, OH

#1 Nov 18, 2011
5 Secrets to a Perfect Relationship
1.It's important to have a woman who helps out at home who cooks and cleans.
2.It's important to have a woman that can make you laugh,and has a good job too.
3.It's important to have a woman you can trust and doesn't lie to you.
4.It's important to have a woman that is awesome in bed and likes being with only you.
5.It is VERY VERY important that these four bitches never meet each other.
Justin

Clyde, OH

#2 Nov 20, 2011
This lady walks into a bar and says"Bartender, bring me a bottle of vodka". She then drinks the whole bottle in about an hour and passed out on the bar.
About 20 of the men in the bar took her in the back room and had their way with her.

The next night the same lady walked into the same bar and said "Bartender, bring me a bottle of vodka".
Again, she drank the whole bottle and passed out on the bar. And once again the crowd of men took her in the back room and had their way with her.

On the third night the lady walked into the bar and said "Bartender, bring me a bottle of Whiskey"
The bartender said "I thought your were a Vodka drinker"! And the lady said," I used to but Vodka makes my pussy hurt".!!!
lolwut

Athens, OH

#5 Nov 27, 2012
Smartiepants wrote:
Bob was walking along the beach when he heard the sound of a woman crying. He walked over and found a woman with no arms or legs lying face up on the sand at the water's edge. Bob asked her "Why are you crying?" and she replied "Because I was born with no arms or legs and I've never been kissed." So Bob leaned down and kissed her softly.
As Bob started to walk away, the woman began wailing uncontrollably. He asked her "Why are you crying now?" and she replied "Because I was born with no arms or legs and I've never been f*cked." So Bob reached down, picked her up and flung her out into the ocean.
How did she get down to the beach if she has no arms and legs?
lolwut

Athens, OH

#6 Nov 27, 2012
A rich man and a poor man got the same wedding anniversary and every year they meet on madison avenue when their shopping for their wives.

So the poor man says to the rich man,“What’d you buy your wife this year?”
He says,”I got her a huge diamond ring and a brand new Mercedes.”
Poor man says,”What’d you get her both for?”
Rich man says,“If she don’t like the diamond ring she can bring it back in the Mercedes and still be happy.”

Rich man says to the poor man,“What’d you get your wife this year?”
He says,“I got her a pair of slippers and dildo.”
Rich man says,”What’d you get her a pair of slippers and a dildo for?”
And the poor man says,“Because if she don’t like the slippers she can go f@@ck herself."
DrB

United States

#7 Nov 28, 2012
A man and his wife decide to take a cruise so the man tells his wife he is going to the drug store to pick up a few things. Once at the drug store he goes to the pharmacist and ask for a box of condoms and a bottle of sea sick pills. When he gets back home the wife says we really should take the long cruise. So the man goes back to the drug store and asks the pharmacist for another box of condoms and another bottle of sea sick pills.

The pharmacist then says to the man, hey buddy if that stuff makes you that sick you really should lay off of it for a little while.
Teen age dream

Clyde, OH

#8 Nov 28, 2012
A pretty young woman is laying on her death bed,no one can figure out what is killing her. The doctor tells her husband if he wants to talk to her do it its his last chance. He sets on the bed side the wife says I need to die with a clean concience, the husband says none of that matters now, she said no I must tell you. I F**ked your brother and your best friend. The husband says thats ok I knew, why do you think I poisoned you !!!!
dognes

Masontown, PA

#9 Nov 29, 2012
Smartiepants

United States

#10 Dec 11, 2012
What do you call a dead blonde in the closet?

Last year's hide-and-go-seek champion!
Smartiepants

United States

#11 Dec 11, 2012
lolwut wrote:
<quoted text>
How did she get down to the beach if she has no arms and legs?
Swim out and ask 'er. ;)
HaHa

Nicholasville, KY

#12 Dec 12, 2012
Love them

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