Adoption and fostering - financial in...
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Level 1

Since: Oct 12

Trailorville

#23 Oct 22, 2012
I am a single foster mom and wow a lot of these numbers are so messed up! Right now I just have one little one whom I am in the messy battle of adopting (because I love her with all my heart, not because of the partial college fund the IRS gives me for her when the adoption is finalized) and by no means could this be a substitute full-time salary job! I get $392/month for her due to her age(she turns 2 in 17 days!); of that I have to report (off the top of my head)$65 of it that has to be spent on clothing and allowance. So I figured it up one day out of curiosity. Since I work 24 hours a day/7 days a week, I get paid 0.45 an hour to do what I do if I didn't spend any of the other money on the child (I honestly actually LOSE money being a foster mom though! Food, diapers, wipes, toys, books, bottles, clothes, gear, photo packages, etc. etc.). So if you're looking into doing this for the money, think really hard about what I just told you. Also consider how much work it really is. If you do it well and for the right reasons, you are exhausted by the end of the day (happy and fulfilled but exhausted).

As for whether or not I will accept the insurance when the adoption finalizes (fingers crossed), I unfortunately will have to for the time being. I myself am dealing with brain cancer (Pontine Glioma) and am also on Medicare but as soon as I have the ability to work again, we'll be off "the system" but that doesn't mean I'm doing this for any kind of "kick-backs". I am lucky enough to be a stay-at-home mom right now and we may be the farthest thing from rich but I'm one hell of a bargain hunter and she's loved more than any amount of money could ever buy =) Although, she's the only grandbaby so she's really spoiled by her grandparents, haha.

And to JayDog! Don't let these comments make you change your mind about your family! If you feel in your heart that you are loved, then you are loved! Not all foster parents are bad! And the truth of it is, it's not a money maker by any means!!! Don't let stupid comments come between you and your family! That would kill me if my little one thought that some day just because she saw other foster children running through our house! I don't want to close my doors to other little ones after adopting her but I always want her to know that I am adopting her because she was always meant to be mine, regardless of who gave birth to her =) I'm sure your parents feel the same way about you =)

As for the person that wrote this post: You are fooling no one. Stay out of the fostering program. Good foster parents fight tooth and nail as it is to keep a decent name for this system without adding more of your kind to the mix. Seeking money in exchange for half-assed babysitting is not what this program is about. It's about being a substitute parent (and possibly permanent) and making sure your children's needs are met and that you raise them to be the kind of people other parents wish they could have raised. Their stipend, is just that: theirs. Only a heartless scumbag would take a child's money to better his/her own life over their's.
who cares

Ithaca, NY

#24 Oct 22, 2012
DAD wrote:
I know someone who fosters and it's dollars a day, hardly enough to feed and cloth the children you take in. As it should be, there are people who just take in kids for the money...sad.
You are absolutely right!!!!

I had Temporary Custody of my 3 teenage grandaughters due to their Mom's illness where she was unable to care for them. As a Grandparent, I fell under a Federal Grant administered by our local Social Services (a/k/a Welfare) which I found to be very humiliating.

I had to go thru the needless paperwork that anyone applying for Welfare has to do - for EACH grandaughter. In return, I was entitled to $236 a month to feed them, clothe them, and provide a home for each one!

After 6 months, I then had to go thru the process of being "recertified" - more processing of needless paperwork and documentation!!!! At this point, I told Social Services what they could do with their $236 a month as I was all done in being treated like just another Welfare handout!!!!!!

Supposedly, the purpose of this Federal Grant for Grandparents with Custody was to "reward" them for keeping their grandchildren out of the Foster Care system which was allegedly more expensive than what Grandparents were entitled to.

IMO- NOTHING is worth getting involved with Social Services!!!!!

As an added note, after two years, their Mother overcame her illness and all three of my grandaughters were returned to their Mom. I was glad I was there and able to care for them. I did all of this out of love - NOT MONEY!!!!!!
Adopted child

Walled Lake, MI

#25 Oct 22, 2012
I freaking knew it. My adoptive parents always told me they made nothing from us. They've adopted 9 kids and have always HAD, while I had to do bottle drives to join the cheer team, wore clothes that were too small and was fed crap for food. this makes complete sense though. I mean they just told my mentally ill adoptive brother that while he receives ssi and had to open his own bank account for it to be placed in (he's 18 but still in school) it was really their money and that the government says its theirs. I cannot even believe this. The only reason I was questioning is that while I was looking for my social security card I came across a file with bio brothers name on it, it's right next to mine so I thought my card might have slipped in there, he was in a treatment facility for a month, which means they weren't eligible for the subsidy, and the state was demanding that they repay $701.00 that they shouldn't have received. I remember when he was there. They told him they couldn't go see him on weekends because they had to pay for his treatment and couldn't afford the gas. Ugh.
Adoptive mom

United States

#26 Oct 23, 2012
Yes it is true that some families that foster/adopt get large stipends. What you must understand is that these children are special needs children. That may gave serious health issues or severe behavioral issues. I don't want to get too personal about our situation, but our child would still be in a terrible place if it wasn't for us taking on a huge responsibility of caring for him/her. We knew nothing about this huge stipends until after the fact. We love this child with all of our heart and are able to provide a wonderful life for her without the extra money, however not everyone can do that. For those families this money is NEEDED. Caring for a child like this is extremely time consuming and emotionally draining at times. I cannot stress this enough, again without getting into fine details. Our child is adopted so we no longer have to deal with the foster care part, this is even worse. With a special needs child they own you. Holy cow the time you spend to go to meetings, counseling, have them at your house, etc. Is incredible. Like a full time in itself. If the child is not special needs the amount received is NOT enough to properly care for the child. It is something, but minimal. There are bad eggs out there, as with any situation, but the majority are good people who love children. We love ours as if we were her/his original parents. Please don't try to put a negative cloud over the fostering/ adoption options out there because of the money. It could mean the difference of someone being able to open their home to a child or not. The money could be used to pay the mortgage, bills, afford a parent to not work in order to care for said child, activities, great clothes, or to save fir their future if not needed...maybe more people could think about saving a child from a life with no family. Imagine having a social worker visit you in a childrens home for Christmas because you have absolutely no family to visit you. It is a pretty sad life some of these children live. The money is still being spent to care for them in these situations, even more so. I would rather see them with a family that loves them. Enough said.

Level 7

Since: Jan 08

Rome

#27 Oct 23, 2012
Adoptive mom wrote:
Enough said.
And said very well. Bless you.
True

Utica, NY

#28 Oct 23, 2012
Adoptive mom wrote:
Yes it is true that some families that foster/adopt get large stipends. What you must understand is that these children are special needs children. That may gave serious health issues or severe behavioral issues. I don't want to get too personal about our situation, but our child would still be in a terrible place if it wasn't for us taking on a huge responsibility of caring for him/her. We knew nothing about this huge stipends until after the fact. We love this child with all of our heart and are able to provide a wonderful life for her without the extra money, however not everyone can do that. For those families this money is NEEDED. Caring for a child like this is extremely time consuming and emotionally draining at times. I cannot stress this enough, again without getting into fine details. Our child is adopted so we no longer have to deal with the foster care part, this is even worse. With a special needs child they own you. Holy cow the time you spend to go to meetings, counseling, have them at your house, etc. Is incredible. Like a full time in itself. If the child is not special needs the amount received is NOT enough to properly care for the child. It is something, but minimal. There are bad eggs out there, as with any situation, but the majority are good people who love children. We love ours as if we were her/his original parents. Please don't try to put a negative cloud over the fostering/ adoption options out there because of the money. It could mean the difference of someone being able to open their home to a child or not. The money could be used to pay the mortgage, bills, afford a parent to not work in order to care for said child, activities, great clothes, or to save fir their future if not needed...maybe more people could think about saving a child from a life with no family. Imagine having a social worker visit you in a childrens home for Christmas because you have absolutely no family to visit you. It is a pretty sad life some of these children live. The money is still being spent to care for them in these situations, even more so. I would rather see them with a family that loves them. Enough said.
I couldn't have said it any better myself.
Bulldung

Utica, NY

#29 Oct 23, 2012
Adoptive mom wrote:
Yes it is true that some families that foster/adopt get large stipends. What you must understand is that these children are special needs children. That may gave serious health issues or severe behavioral issues. I don't want to get too personal about our situation, but our child would still be in a terrible place if it wasn't for us taking on a huge responsibility of caring for him/her. We knew nothing about this huge stipends until after the fact. We love this child with all of our heart and are able to provide a wonderful life for her without the extra money, however not everyone can do that. For those families this money is NEEDED. Caring for a child like this is extremely time consuming and emotionally draining at times. I cannot stress this enough, again without getting into fine details. Our child is adopted so we no longer have to deal with the foster care part, this is even worse. With a special needs child they own you. Holy cow the time you spend to go to meetings, counseling, have them at your house, etc. Is incredible. Like a full time in itself. If the child is not special needs the amount received is NOT enough to properly care for the child. It is something, but minimal. There are bad eggs out there, as with any situation, but the majority are good people who love children. We love ours as if we were her/his original parents. Please don't try to put a negative cloud over the fostering/ adoption options out there because of the money. It could mean the difference of someone being able to open their home to a child or not. The money could be used to pay the mortgage, bills, afford a parent to not work in order to care for said child, activities, great clothes, or to save fir their future if not needed...maybe more people could think about saving a child from a life with no family. Imagine having a social worker visit you in a childrens home for Christmas because you have absolutely no family to visit you. It is a pretty sad life some of these children live. The money is still being spent to care for them in these situations, even more so. I would rather see them with a family that loves them. Enough said.
What if there is a family in Rome that uses the system for every penny they can get? What if they have been adopting children for years and years for the income! What if they have a new house, a new car, he has a new truck and it's mostly all about the money! What if the children's income pay all the bills and his job money is all slush fund! The truly sickening part is that it's very possible that as an ex employee of the advocacy center she could have been using her job to pic children for the most income! People like this don't deserve what they have do they? Well do they?
Adoptive mom

East Haven, CT

#30 Oct 23, 2012
They are adopting children and giving them a home and a family. Anyone can find children with the most income if they know what to look for. If she worked for the advocacy center she probably really wants to help the children. Their home, cars, whatever are also the children's. It's where they live and what they are driven around in. I applaud these people. There are over 120,000 children in the UNITED STATES. Instead of worrying about how much people are profiting why don't you be more constructive and find a way to help this situation.
Adoptive mom

Fitchburg, MA

#31 Oct 24, 2012
The above should say: There are over 120,000 children in the UNITED STATES available for adoption.
Loving couple providing

Tobyhanna, PA

#32 Jan 30, 2013
After working hard most of our lives my husband became disabled and I am not in a position I can work full time. I have a teenage girl of my own and foster other teenagers that are hard to place for various reasons. The money is a deciding factor however we give these kids, love, a fun life, a structured family to learn morals and responsibility where there own family has failed. So yes the money may be a factor but we are doing a good job and go over and above what is expected of us as foster parents. And yes disability, a few foster children at a higher stipend and minimal food stamps does afford us the occasional Pizza Hut but we are also on call 24 /7 and put everything into our job, these kids never hurt for the latest technology, food or clothes. So to all you judgmental people and ex foster kids out there how many of you can say your job helps so many people and would you have the heart for a job like this?
Adoptive mom of 2

Utica, NY

#33 Feb 6, 2013
You people who are trying to get rich off adopting children obviously need two things, a job and to pull your heads out of your butts! I am the proud mother of 2 awesome adopted children. The only compensation we get is the privlege to love and raise these kids. Yes, we got a one time tax credit. Did it cover the cost of the adoptions? Absolutely not!! I have no idea where you would get financially compensated. To think you would expect financial reward is probably a very good reason for you not to adopt!!
adoptive mom

United States

#34 Feb 20, 2013
Adoptive mom of 2 wrote:
You people who are trying to get rich off adopting children obviously need two things, a job and to pull your heads out of your butts! I am the proud mother of 2 awesome adopted children. The only compensation we get is the privlege to love and raise these kids. Yes, we got a one time tax credit. Did it cover the cost of the adoptions? Absolutely not!! I have no idea where you would get financially compensated. To think you would expect financial reward is probably a very good reason for you not to adopt!!
I agree! I also don't understand why people keep referring to the expenses of clothing and food, etc. as items that should be paid for AFTER adoption! I paid $40,000 for my adoption, as many, many people have, got $11,000 back as a tax credit, and now take care of my child the way all adoptive parents should, AS MY OWN. No one should receive benefits after adopting, and particularly not anyone whose child doesn't require some kind of expensive therapy. We pay parents who have kids with mild "disabilities", who don't even need the money for therapy or services! My child is covered under my medical insurance, not the government. She is not an easy child, but she is mine, and the government should not be expected to help me with her!
Adoptive Mom

United States

#35 Feb 20, 2013
I appreciate that you paid $40 000 to adopt your child. My guess is that this was an infant and that your child was adopted from another country. This is the difference. When people in the U.S. get stipends after adopting a child they are older, disabled, or mentally ill. They are special needs and come with a lot of baggage. These children are often classified as unadoptable due to their special circumstances. The state pays a hefty price for all of these kids while in placements. Once adopted in certain cases the family will get a stipend until the child is 18. This money often makes it possible for a family to care for this child. It is much better for them to be with a permenant family than in the foster care system. I will say it again...their are over 120,000 children available in the U.S. for adoption. The numbers speak for themselves.....they are very hard to find families for because these kids are not easy! No need to spend $40,000 for one when they are right here and free, but nobody wants them. So stop criticizing those that adopt hard to place children because I can criticize you all day long for spending $40,000 to get a child when this many are without a family and growing older everyday with nobody until they age out of the system at 18 and continue to have nobody. The government gives ridiculous amounts of money out to welfare recipients who choose not to work, other countries, and countless amounts of nonsense. This is money being used well. It cares for our future...our children.
Clarity

Utica, NY

#36 Feb 21, 2013
Well let's clarify a few things here. "Adoptive Mom" is right with some of her numbers... there ARE a lot of kids awaiting adoption in the US, and many of them come with some amount of baggage. BUT... the way the laws presently read, any kid over 2 years old is "special needs" and the the adoptive parent gets a free bonus check of $13,100. This is unfair. Not all two year olds are "special needs", and this is just a stupid gift of money.
Well Well Well

Utica, NY

#37 Feb 21, 2013
jaydog wrote:
As a child who has been adopted and lives in a home with numerous foster children. This news is disgusting and shocking. I feel like a job to be compenstated for and not like a daughter at all.
How can someone be be adopted and still live in foster homes?

I thought unadopted kids live in foster homes and adopted kids live with the family that adopted them.
Adoptive Mom

Hatfield, MA

#38 Feb 21, 2013
The adoption credit is for adoption expenses. Anyone who adopts and makes under a certain amount of money is eligible. If you adopt a baby from China and spend $40,000 you are eligible. You can get just over $13,000 back. If the child is special needs...and believe me, just being over 2 does not qualify child as special needs, then you can get the tax credit without having to spend the $13,000. As I said before this is to help pay for things that are above and beyond for this child. They are hard to find families for. If people are jealous about it then they can adopt a special needs child, claim the credit, and see how they feel about it then. I bet your view will change when you see the time and effort this child needs. So to all of you negative jealous people I offer this challenge: Call the House of the Good Shepherd, go to months of classes, have them inspect your home, get new furniture for a child, and hope you get a child. If you get a special needs child then you will see how it is and then you are qualified to give educated comments.
I also cannot stress enough how much we love our adopted, special needs child....we would have adopted her regardless of these incentives and had no idea about them until the adoption was in progress. What I have to say about it is that it is a GOOD thing that our government does. It is not a waste of money and is used for an excellent cause.
mommytomyniece

Evansville, IN

#39 Apr 27, 2013
I would just like to say this to you! Who are you too judge anyone at all? I was basically given my niece because my sister is a drug head. I could of let her fallen victim of the state but i didn't! Now here i am only 25 and YES ME AND MY HUSBAND works, but don't make enough to support our two kids and my niece. So we rely on the state to help us! I can tell you this I have never asked for a single fuckin dime from anyone on my beautiful niece/daughter!!! You have no right to say that honest hard working middle class folks don't deserve help. Yea i guess i could of let her gone to the state and yea maybe the big word there is MAYBE she would of found a fincially set family to adopt her but more often than not these kids live in foster care for the rest of their lives until their 18 and then release for who knows what!!! Im sorry there will be NO maybe in her future!!!! And just because you don't have that much money and you do need a little help and highly agree with the tax break by the way! Doesn't make you anyless of person! It's hard to give up your life for a child try giving it up for a child you didn't birth!!!! And don't try and say oh you know you would. That's the easiest approach to it. I love my neice in one month will be my daughter and im happy there is financial support for those families willing to give up everything for a child, there should be support for them. Because unlike you who can get child support off a dead beat parent we got nothing nothing at all!!!! Don't try to pull that shit! You'll just look ignorant in the end!!!
Shylowe

United States

#40 Jun 4, 2013
Raising children IS a job and should be compensated for. It is maybe the most important job. To learn that I'd make more money babysitting a normal well adjusted child, then fostering is disgusting.
The reason we don't have good teachers in our schools is that they get paid SHIT in comparison to other, much less important jobs. What is more important then raising a child to be a good person?
If the pay is crap, then you're going to have a bunch of stupid crappy people taking the job, or some beautiful 'bleeding heart' who eventually gets bled dry and stops caring (we've all met THAT teacher)
And stop with this whole 'the rite reason, the wrong reason' shit. Fostering is like full time babysitting, for an emotionally damaged child, until they are hopefully taken back to the crappy home your home replaced. IT'S A JOB, a 24 hour a day JOB. You don't look down at group-home workers for cashing their checks at the end of the week do you? and they get paid MORE then foster parents do.
interesting

Sherburne, NY

#41 Jun 4, 2013
This has been a very interesting read. Thank You to all who love their children for no other reason but true Love!

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