new years day family problem

Posted in the Utica Forum

sue bleecker

Fairport, NY

#1 Jan 1, 2014
today new years day I had my adult children to my home for dinner. I did not serve a elaborate meal but one of pizza , chicken wings, salad, fruit and a vegetable tray, followed by a desert of cake and icecream. my two youngest grandchildren are 12 and 10 yrs. old. My adult grandchild is 25 yrs. old . I have a very large kitchen with an island in center, on this was all the food. while everyone was helping themselves to the meal..I said to my youngest grandchild daniel, I have the chicken wings cooked do you want some? he said yes Grammy, he, daniel came around to the island in the kitchen and I proceeded to ask him what he wanted I started to put the wings on his plate and then asked hime if he wanted the wings or the drumsticks, please more drumsicks grammy was his answer, this I did and then he took his plate and went back to sit at the table. I then said to my oldest grandschild philip . would you like some chicken wings,? he started to hand me his plate and then I thought of handing him the plate of wings so that he could pick out what he wanted to eat . so I passed the plate to him and then his mother started telling me I was being inconsiderate and showingrudeness and not being polite because I did not make his plate but made my other grandchild his I said Philip was 25 yrs. old and old enough for making his own plate. Daniel is 10 years old. anyway daughter in law started yelling at me and I asked her to get out of my house. she said I was selfish and rude and uncaring because I did not make her son plate . I burst in tears and stated shaking my heart was pounding and I also felt bewildered . things got out of hand with her remarks to me so I said please get out of my house. My son who is 54 did not say anything to amend the situation. also months go by before I hear from my son. he lived very close by but does not visit and only calls me about every 3 months . I am not invite to their home very often actually this past year it was the first time in 3 years.I do not feel I did anything wrong in my behavior. I am very sad and hurt . I just had enough of being igored all these years and said what I meant by asking my son and his wife to leave my home. please can someone anwer this forum please ignor some of the typing mistakes.
Magdalena

Utica, NY

#2 Jan 1, 2014
Next time, don't serve chicken wings.
pam

Little Falls, NY

#3 Jan 1, 2014
sue bleecker wrote:
today new years day I had my adult children to my home for dinner. I did not serve a elaborate meal but one of pizza , chicken wings, salad, fruit and a vegetable tray, followed by a desert of cake and icecream. my two youngest grandchildren are 12 and 10 yrs. old. My adult grandchild is 25 yrs. old . I have a very large kitchen with an island in center, on this was all the food. while everyone was helping themselves to the meal..I said to my youngest grandchild daniel, I have the chicken wings cooked do you want some? he said yes Grammy, he, daniel came around to the island in the kitchen and I proceeded to ask him what he wanted I started to put the wings on his plate and then asked hime if he wanted the wings or the drumsticks, please more drumsicks grammy was his answer, this I did and then he took his plate and went back to sit at the table. I then said to my oldest grandschild philip . would you like some chicken wings,? he started to hand me his plate and then I thought of handing him the plate of wings so that he could pick out what he wanted to eat . so I passed the plate to him and then his mother startedng to do chickenor fixing his plate something a lot more is glong on with how your son and his wife feel towad you telling me I was being inconsiderate and showingrudeness and not being polite because I did not make his plate but made my other grandchild his I said Philip was 25 yrs. old and old enough for making his own plate. Daniel is 10 years old. anyway daughter in law started yelling at me and I asked her to get out of my house. she said I was selfish and rude and uncaring because I did not make her son plate . I burst in tears and stated shaking my heart was pounding and I also felt bewildered . things got out of hand with her remarks to me so I said please get out of my house. My son who is 54 did not say anything to amend the situation. also months go by before I hear from my son. he lived very close by but does not visit and only calls me about every 3 months . I am not invite to their home very often actually this past year it was the first time in 3 years.I do not feel I did anything wrong in my behavior. I am very sad and hurt . I just had enough of being igored all these years and said what I meant by asking my son and his wife to leave my home. please can someone anwer this forum please ignor some of the typing mistakes.
It sounds like this fight had.noth
Daquan

Utica, NY

#4 Jan 1, 2014
Sound to me like you need some 12 inch black dick.
pam

Little Falls, NY

#5 Jan 1, 2014
sue bleecker wrote:
today new years day I had my adult children to my home for dinner. I did not serve a elaborate meal but one of pizza , chicken wings, salad, fruit and a vegetable tray, followed by a desert of cake and icecream. my two youngest grandchildren are 12 and 10 yrs. old. My adult grandchild is 25 yrs. old . I have a very large kitchen with an island in center, on this was all the food. while everyone was helping themselves to the meal..I said to my youngest grandchild daniel, I have the chicken wings cooked do you want some? he said yes Grammy, he, daniel came around to the island in the kitchen and I proceeded to ask him what he wanted I started to put the wings on his plate and then asked hime if he wanted the wings or the drumsticks, please more drumsicks grammy was his answer, this I did and then he took his plate and went back to sit at the table. I then said to my oldest grandschild philip . would you like some chicken wings,? he started to hand me his plate and then I thought of handing him the plate of wings so that he could pick out what he wanted to eat . so I passed the plate to him and then his mother started telling me I was being inconsiderate and showingrudeness and not being polite because I did not make his plate but made my other grandchild his I said Philip was 25 yrs. old and old enough for making his own plate. Daniel is 10 years old. anyway daughter in law started yelling at me and I asked her to get out of my house. she said I was selfish and rude and uncaring because I did not make her son plate . I burst in tears and stated shaking my heart was pounding and I also felt bewildered . things got out of hand with her remarks to me so I said please get out of my house. My son who is 54 did not say anything to amend the situation. also months go by before I hear from my son. he lived very close by but does not visit and only calls me about every 3 months . I am not invite to their home very often actually this past year it was the first time in 3 years.I do not feel I did anything wrong in my behavior. I am very sad and hurt . I just had enough of being igored all these years and said what I meant by asking my son and his wife to leave my home. please can someone anwer this forum please ignor some of the typing mistakes.
Your daughter inlaw was looking for a fight and it had nothing to do with chicken she's angry at you about something but what?
Happy New Year

Houston, TX

#7 Jan 2, 2014
You did nothing wrong. Move on.
WOW

South New Berlin, NY

#8 Jan 2, 2014
It's never just about the chicken wings. But it may not have been about you either. She could have been upset about any number of things and you were just there at the time she blew up. Bottom line is she was a guest in your home who behaved badly. Don't waste any more of your time thinking about it. She owes you an apology. If she has a deeper problem with you, the two of you can disscuss it over lunch somewhere as adults. Happy New Year & don't worry, every family has these blow-ups.
vilesreggin

Kurilov, Ukraine

#9 Jan 2, 2014
Daquan wrote:
Sound to me like you need some 12 inch black dick.
SREGGIN are a plague on the country, 2000 years an they still watch children stave to death.

STD corn scrapping EBT.
Degenerate

Utica, NY

#10 Jan 2, 2014
Omg seriously? This sounds like one of the few legit posts on this dumb site. I'msorry for you Sue. I really am. This should never have happened. 3 things- the 50 year old mother should never have presumed to say anything to you at all, lest of all in front of everybody else IN YOUR HOME, the 25 year old should have said you're right and thank you and tell his mom to shut up and stop being so rude and disrespectful, and your son of all people should have chimed in to support you while respectfully addressing his out of bounds, clearly mental and insecure, etc, wife. YOU did NOTHING wrong. This makes clear there's good reason they haven't been in your life for a while and they don't deserve to be. It's family so it's hard for all, but do your best to move on without them, including the little tikes, if possible. I'm so sorry for you. People such as these do not deserve people like you or the goodness of the holidays, etc... Sad what our society has become...
vilesreggin

United States

#11 Jan 2, 2014
I would love to have a 12 inch black peenis shoved up my rear end!
snowy

Syracuse, NY

#12 Jan 2, 2014
There seems to be a rather large age gap between the grand kids. Is the oldest your sons or from a previous relationship? Your daughter in law might be hyper sensitive to this and sees everything through that distorted view. Also the fact that they live close and don't communicate or visit often suggests that there is some definite issue going on with them. It also sounds like your son is being dominated by this woman. If she has the audacity to go off on you in your own home over nothing can you imagine what life is like for your son and grandkids? The only advice I can think to give is to not blame yourself. This woman is a severe head case. Reach out to your son and let him know you are there for him. He is probably hurting more than you know. I have seen this before.
For sure

Utica, NY

#13 Jan 2, 2014
I would have made her a plate of "whoop-ass"...
move on

Rome, NY

#14 Jan 2, 2014
The issue is clearly her and you should do nothing. Bottom line you are her husband's mother and her sons grandmother, she was a guest in your home. Whether sh. Agrees with you or not what she did was completely disrespectful and out of line. One she should not disrespect you in your home and in front of the grandchildren, bad example and two if she had a legitimate issue she could have had your son discuss it with you at a later time.
Angry Charlie

Utica, NY

#15 Jan 2, 2014
This is not "Dear Fckng Abby" so take your stupid problems somewhere else. There are more important things to discuss on TOPIX such as the chip factory, the Comets, and every fckng business in Utica closing.
odd

Utica, NY

#16 Jan 2, 2014
By the ages of all involved, I estimate the poster to be 74...if she had her son at 20. Maybe I am really naive, but do 74 year olds really know about Topix and actually come on to post a story like that?

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