Battered men and unfair legal system

Battered men and unfair legal system

Posted in the Tehachapi Forum

Lynn Trasvina

Bakersfield, CA

#1 Mar 24, 2012
Picture this: a spouse’s fist, kicks, verbal/psychological abuse, threats. Now picture this: the spouse…is female. According to the Department of Justice, 36% of domestic violence victims are men, yet in the US, there is a bias.
A friend of mine, male, has been experiencing marital problems for awhile, and his wife’s abuse has grown unrestrained. She packs his bags, telling him to leave, yet he refuses to abandon their three small children. She is jealous and accuses him of infidelity, searches his belongings, and monitors his phone’s GPS tracking device. If this were a female, it would be deemed “stalking” and “abuse.” Some ask, why doesn’t he just get divorced? But he fears losing his children and that the court system will side in her favor.
Recently, she was hitting his head with her fist, kicking him, screaming and throwing his clothes outside. At one point, he pushed her back, attempting to free himself so that he could continue to the car. Once he left, he went to Tehachapi police to file a report, giving a play by play of the incident; however, once he said he “pushed” her off, the questioning turned toward him. Immediately, he was in handcuffs and being arrested for abuse.
I don’t understand how such an injustice is possible. How can my friend ever expect a fair divorce/custody case when he is up against an abusive wife and a legal system that is clearly on her side?

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