After 3 years, couple turns boy over ...

After 3 years, couple turns boy over to father in Ohio | The Columbus Dispatch

There are 119 comments on the Columbus Dispatch story from Nov 1, 2010, titled After 3 years, couple turns boy over to father in Ohio | The Columbus Dispatch. In it, Columbus Dispatch reports that:

An Indiana couple has surrendered a boy they raised for three years to his biological father in Ohio after a long custody battle, an attorney said.

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char51

Dayton, OH

#1 Nov 1, 2010
he has a right to his son, if the woman didnt wont him. after all she could have aborted him, glad she choose life, but the father has rights to. so many ,familys are lossing there childern, to the court by lieing case workers, and sometimes by there own mothers not wonting to be mothers.i do feel bad for the people. but i know alot about what happens on the other side. of it . familys loseing a part of the family, never to see them again.so, dont be so had, on the father, if he didnt know soon enough.
Joe

Powell, OH

#2 Nov 1, 2010
The father had better demonstrate that he is worthy of the child. Sounds suspicious to me.

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Resturant Free Zone

Columbus, OH

#3 Nov 1, 2010
According to the story.....this case has been in the courts for 3 years.....no wonder people are sick of our system. I feel sad for the adoptive parent's. The story made mention that Wyrembek might be the father....was a DNA test done? Also, Wyrembek was messing around with a married woman.....so much for moral's, and now he want's to raise the child.......He does not deserve to have the child period.

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whatever

Columbus, OH

#4 Nov 1, 2010
How tragic for both sides.

When the father filed the petition, why didn't the IN family give him back to the dad? Yes, it would have been sad, but, after three years it is now heartbreaking for them.

This is exactly why fathers should have a say. He could have been rasing his son for the past three years, but instead now he is going to have a confused son.

Hopefully the dad gets child support from the biological mother.

Did the bilogical mother do this out of spite?
BuckeyeRon

Hilliard, OH

#5 Nov 1, 2010
Joe wrote:
The father had better demonstrate that he is worthy of the child. Sounds suspicious to me.
"Sounds suspicious." Just what is that supposed to mean?
HJG

Columbus, OH

#6 Nov 1, 2010
I have not followed this one closely so this may have been in a previous article - but when did the biological father learn about the pregnancy? If he knew all along and waited until after the child was adopted to claim him then I do not have a lot of sympathy for him. As Resturant Free Zone asked, was there a DNA test done?
I feel very sorry for the child right now. He must feel so confused. I pray that no matter the next outcome of the court that he has a good life in a loving home.
Columbus Mom

Columbus, OH

#7 Nov 1, 2010
WHAT ABOUT THE CHILD??? Not only do any of the comments mention what's best for the child, the article doesn't either. The boy will lose the only parents he's ever known, and will have a very difficult period adjusting to living with his father. I feel very sorry for this poor frightened emotionally traumatized child - no one, including the courts, seem to take his needs into account.
George

Columbus, OH

#8 Nov 1, 2010
To Restaurant Free Zone - why should it matter that the child was conceived during an affair? The father should have the right to raise his own child. He might be a wonderful father. You do not know the facts behind the affair.
Ohio Christian Man

Westerville, OH

#9 Nov 1, 2010
It takes more than sperm to be a father. He may have one, but he's not the other.
MrsSmith

Marengo, OH

#10 Nov 1, 2010
Columbus Mom wrote:
WHAT ABOUT THE CHILD??? Not only do any of the comments mention what's best for the child, the article doesn't either. The boy will lose the only parents he's ever known, and will have a very difficult period adjusting to living with his father. I feel very sorry for this poor frightened emotionally traumatized child - no one, including the courts, seem to take his needs into account.
That's exactly what the people who adopted him were counting on when they refused to give the child to his father. It's a common tactic in child custody cases; keep the child as long as you can through delays of the court system and then claim the child was with you for a long period of time and will be emotionally harmed. The Indiana couple should get any blame for traumatizing this child, not the courts and not the father.
concerned

United States

#11 Nov 1, 2010
The child should be primary concern here. He has only known his adoptive parents. Where was the biological father during the pregnancy and birth? I find this to be traumatic for the child as well as the adoptive parents. Why can't the adoptive parents keep the child and have the biological father present in the child's life. The biological father will soon find that it is not easy to raise a child that he has forcefully taken from the only parents the child has ever known. At 3yrs old, the child knows who he loves and who has taken care of him and who has been there for him etc etc etc. I hope we are not reading about the death by abuse of this child because the biological father couldn't take it anymore.........
kilroy is a nightmare

Columbus, OH

#12 Nov 1, 2010
Shame on the 'father'. HE should have let this child stay with the only parents he has known. it is not this child's fault that he was messing around with a married woman.

God only knows how this scum will raise him.
Pooping now

Westerville, OH

#13 Nov 1, 2010
That's terrible take a little boy from his adopted family it was the mother choice to put the boy up for adoption absolute bull.
Bewildered

Newark, OH

#14 Nov 1, 2010
Once upon a time it was marriage that protected the rights of the father. If a man wanted to be involved with his children, he had darn well better be married to their mother; he had no claims to any child outside the bonds of matrimony. It may not have been a perfect system, but at least everyone knew where they stood legally, and children were not ripped from the arms of the only mother they ever knew because some cad decided he wanted to exercise his so-called paternal rights.
D-Saunders

Columbus, OH

#15 Nov 1, 2010
I agree with George from Columbus, Ohio. The affair the father had has absolutely nothing to do with the kind of father he is going to be. Also to HJG in Columbus, Ohio if you read the article it states that the father filed for custody 30 days after the child was born which means he acted very quickly. It is not his fault that it has taken the court three years to decide the child's fate. The bottom line is this: if the biological mother did not want the child then all rights should have been given to the biological father first and foremost. I also agree that it has to be a very difficult time for the child because the child is used to the adoptive parents. My brother and his wife adopted a little boy a year ago and I couldn't imagine someone taking him away from us. Not to mention how detrimental it would be for him. So I just pray that all goes well and that all parties involved have some kind of closure.
Perhaps

Columbus, OH

#16 Nov 1, 2010
Columbus Mom wrote:
WHAT ABOUT THE CHILD??? Not only do any of the comments mention what's best for the child, the article doesn't either. The boy will lose the only parents he's ever known, and will have a very difficult period adjusting to living with his father. I feel very sorry for this poor frightened emotionally traumatized child - no one, including the courts, seem to take his needs into account.
I couldn't agree more! There has been three years of bonding between the child and adoptive parents. To yank him away (court or no courts) and place him with a complete stranger, will be interpreted, in his young mind, as being kidnapped or abandoned. Remember,this is a very young child without the ability to process logic and reason on the adult level.

Sadly, should Dad (the winner) get tired of a frightened, whiney, uncooperative little boy, the outcome may not be what was expected. It seems this was all about adults, with little consideration for what is best for the child.
Frank

Granville, OH

#17 Nov 1, 2010
Ohio Christian Man wrote:
It takes more than sperm to be a father. He may have one, but he's not the other.
Yes, he has a father, and yes, he is not a sperm.
good dad

Ashland, KY

#18 Nov 1, 2010
I think that this woman should never have been allowed to give away a child that did not belong to her in the first place. Adoption agencies should do further investigation and remember that it takes two people to have a child. I think when he started the search for his child the adoption should have been put on hold at that time. Fathers should not be kept from their rights just because they are not the one that actually carry the child. My son had to go to the county where his ex-girlfriend was living and insist that he wanted to pay childsupport and see his son. They recommended that he get a DNA done first which he did and the child was his. He has had a loving relationship with his son ever since even though he still does not have custody.
Adoption agencies and courts alike need to remember that every man is not a deadbeat dad.
mother7

Columbus, OH

#19 Nov 1, 2010
Perhaps wrote:
<quoted text>
I couldn't agree more! There has been three years of bonding between the child and adoptive parents. To yank him away (court or no courts) and place him with a complete stranger, will be interpreted, in his young mind, as being kidnapped or abandoned. Remember,this is a very young child without the ability to process logic and reason on the adult level.
Sadly, should Dad (the winner) get tired of a frightened, whiney, uncooperative little boy, the outcome may not be what was expected. It seems this was all about adults, with little consideration for what is best for the child.
The only reason there has been three years of bonding between the child and the adoptive parents is because the Adoptive parents refused to respect the rights of the BIOLOGICAL parent (within 30 days of birth). Any trauma at this point is the fault of the Adoptive parents and Courts who should have let the BIOLOGICAL father have the child..."pending" the investigation. People, we need to stop letting courts and government determine our rights. This man is the childs father and none of this should have happened.
BuckeyeRon

Hilliard, OH

#20 Nov 1, 2010
Having observed literally hundreds of custody disputes over the past 40 years, I can confirm that the battles are almost always about the adults, with insufficient attention paid to the real needs of the children involved. That said, it is altogether possible that all adults in this case acted without regard to the child's best interests, not just the natural father. This litigation apparently commenced shortly after the adoptive placement. Why did the adoptive parents decide to fight and string this out for three years? Were they really thinking about the best interests of the child any more or less than the father? All the adults are probably villains here.

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