When teen dating turns violent

Ed Loos, a junior at Lake Forest High School, said a common reaction among students to Chris Brown 's alleged attack on Rihanna goes something like this: "Ha! She probably did something to provoke it." In ... Read more
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WSJ

Highland Park, IL

#1 Feb 19, 2009
"Last summer, the president of the National Association of Attorneys General launched a campaign called "Working Together to End the Violence" and specifically called on communities to focus on relationship abuse among young people."

In 2002, the first time that Lisa Madigan ran for Illinois Attorney General, one of her campaign issues was to address teen dating violence. What happened?
Chicago60618

Chicago, IL

#2 Feb 20, 2009
why would a student think that an economics class would be the appropriate venue to discuss teen dating?
Zach

Lawrence, KS

#4 Feb 20, 2009
Pretty scary that even one of these kids thinks it's "funny" that her boyfriend hit her. But education can only do some much...as long as guys (and girls that hit too) keep lookup to these celebrities, there is only so much we can do, because we sure as heck know the celebrities won't stop.
Made in USA

Lincolnshire, IL

#6 Feb 20, 2009
therockofages wrote:
The hypocrisy of women is alarming. Their battle cry is 'don't hit me, don't abuse me in any manner of speaking'; all while they physically, mentally, and verbally abuse their boyfriends with impunity, evidently believing it is their God given right to do so. This is reality, the media should tell both sides of the story for a change. News flash to any male that is the recipient of female abuse; call the police and drop her like a bad habit. Demand the same human and civil rights as women demand.
I don't quite follow your argument are you trying to say neither sex should abuse mentally or physically or are you secretly hoping it becomes socially acceptable to slap your woman around?
Laura

Iowa City, IA

#7 Feb 20, 2009
therockofages wrote:
The hypocrisy of women is alarming. Their battle cry is 'don't hit me, don't abuse me in any manner of speaking'; all while they physically, mentally, and verbally abuse their boyfriends with impunity, evidently believing it is their God given right to do so. This is reality, the media should tell both sides of the story for a change. News flash to any male that is the recipient of female abuse; call the police and drop her like a bad habit. Demand the same human and civil rights as women demand.
Wow, buddy, take it easy. I don't think this article says anywhere that it's okay for women to hit/verbally abuse men. The whole point is that abuse in relationships in any form is wrong, and these children needs education on this matter...

Unfortunately, the statistics speak for themselves. More women are abused in relationships than men. This is why there is a focus on helping teen girls understand why abuse is wrong and abnormal.
Matilda

United States

#8 Feb 20, 2009
therockofages wrote:
The hypocrisy of women is alarming. Their battle cry is 'don't hit me, don't abuse me in any manner of speaking'; all while they physically, mentally, and verbally abuse their boyfriends with impunity, evidently believing it is their God given right to do so. This is reality, the media should tell both sides of the story for a change. News flash to any male that is the recipient of female abuse; call the police and drop her like a bad habit. Demand the same human and civil rights as women demand.
Agreed. When I was about 20, I slugged a boyfriend in the arm in response to him teasing me. Then it occured to me that if the scenario were reversed, I might have been filing charges against him. That has stuck with me, and I've not done anything like that since. Human decency is a two way street.
barbkap

Schaumburg, IL

#9 Feb 20, 2009
I don't know that it's true that more women are abused in relationships than men. I think it's that there are more REPORTS of women being abused than of men. I can only think that many men are ashamed to report that a woman is abusing them. But believe me...it's being done by both sides and it's wrong no matter who is doing the abusing!!!
ffej

Darien, IL

#10 Feb 20, 2009
people can be stupid
baldy

Naperville, IL

#11 Feb 20, 2009
Why is anyone surprised?

Popular music, movies and TV shows treat people as objects to be used for pleasure or personal gain, or destroyed if they get in the way or are inconvenient.

You cannot teach any morals is school because people like Eric Zorn start whining that it is a violation of the separation of church and state.

Kids are taught that lying and abuse is OK if you are popular.

And kids are taught that anyone who disagrees with them is intolerant and needs to be shut up.
kittybug

Prospect Heights, IL

#12 Feb 20, 2009
Even in 2009, our little girls are being raised to be valued for their looks and not their intelligence. We spend a few years of their childhood making them princesses and then wonder why they become drama queens. Oh, if we only spent that time educating them and showing them how to deal with what's to come like we do with little boys. With boys we encourage problem-solving, adventure and curiosity. Out little girls, at the young age of four or five are performing to work-out videos and asking if they look fat. The emphasis is on their looks and not on the contribution they can make as adults in the workforce and society.

We don't encourage an attitude of respect toward women, only that of exploitation. I had to laugh. I read the first page of this article, turned the page, and found the SI Swimsuit issue story. There you have it in a nutshell. Beautiful girls (shouldn't they be called women??) in almost-not-there bikinis, where their images can be glanced at, the page turned and their names forgotten. Young women say they can dress and act provocatively because it empowers them as women. Let's be honest. They're likely exhibitionists and enjoy the attention it brings because it's mindless and requires little else from them except the opportunity to debase themselves for a glance. They feel that they have no other value.

How delightful and worthwhile it would be if we raised our daughters to make an intellectual contribution to the world. We are guilty of using the talents of only 50% of our population. No offense, men, but you guys haven't done that good a job. Perhaps we'd better call on the other 50% to think and contribute rather than be window dressing and put themselves in a position to be abused and disrespected. One gains respect by earning it. Our young women would see quite a difference once they learn to respect themselves and not stand for being abused and exploited. This abusive attitude is so pervasive that these young women think they are not worthy of respect and kindness.
mary

Hammond, IN

#13 Feb 20, 2009
Regardless if it is an econ class or a sewing class, maybe the kids had more friends in the class where they felt comfortable speaking about it and a TEACHER or ADULT could have helped, or potentially discovered someone who may have been reaching out. We'll never know, because this "teacher" couldn't deal with it or just didn't want to deal with it.
kittybug

Prospect Heights, IL

#16 Feb 20, 2009
Hey Chi Town guy,

Ha ha. Thanks for the incredibly ignorant response to my posting. So sorry and sad that you don't have enough self confidence and self worth to resist trying to put me down. You're likely one of those abusers we've been talking about. And a drooling sloth of an ogler, stuck in his chair unable to get his own coffee. Live alone, do you? Ha ha. YUK.
Justa Citizen

Highland Park, IL

#17 Feb 20, 2009
Why do newspapers print numbers like the "1 in 10" figure in this article without a) citing a source and b) applying the same scrutiny to these numbers as they would to, say, Cook County budget figures? Numbers like this are usually generated by advocacy groups which have an incentive to make them as large as possible. Without a cite and some deeper analysis, I'd suggest filing these numbers in the same place as the now-discredited claims of a spike in domestic abuse on Super Bowl Sunday.
uh oh

Chicago, IL

#20 Feb 20, 2009
Sociopaths have to start somewhere....generally it's high school.
Verbal abuse is bad too- sets someone up to accept abuse all their lives

htpp://holywatersalt.blogspot. com/
Pat

United States

#23 Feb 20, 2009
For some reason girls think it is OK for their boyfriend to berate them, call them names, hit them, slap them, then say they love her and its all better. These are the losers the girls date when they are older.

Since: Dec 07

DuPage County

#25 Feb 20, 2009
As a father of an attractive 13 year old daughter, I have to say that she is thoroughly aware that she has to be careful, and what is abuse and what isn't abuse.

Girls laughing off being hit by their BF's is a sign of ignorance, plain and simple.
Laura

Iowa City, IA

#26 Feb 20, 2009
Can we please attempt to keep the sexist comments and jokes to a minimum. You wouldn't see racist jokes and comments being left on this message board, but, apparently, sexism is still okay.

And men, please, no one is pointing fingers at all of you saying "you're awful! aahh men suck!" The article is talking about how children see domestic violence as okay and normal. Let's stop pointing fingers and work together? Violence isn't okay whether you're a man or a woman. Let's teach our children that fact.
What A Country

Los Angeles, CA

#29 Feb 20, 2009
Laura wrote:
Can we please attempt to keep the sexist comments and jokes to a minimum. You wouldn't see racist jokes and comments being left on this message board, but, apparently, sexism is still okay.
And men, please, no one is pointing fingers at all of you saying "you're awful! aahh men suck!" The article is talking about how children see domestic violence as okay and normal. Let's stop pointing fingers and work together? Violence isn't okay whether you're a man or a woman. Let's teach our children that fact.
If one has to be TOLD to teach this to one's children then clearly that person is unfit to be a parent.
Reality

United States

#30 Feb 20, 2009
This is NOT common in the larger population folks. However, it IS common in african-american relationships. While it certainly exists in other unions, statistics say that black women are 3x more likely to be physically assaulted by a partner.

Incidently, black on black crime (even though their overall percentage within the populace is in the teens), is higher than caucasion and hispanic rates by nearly 2-1.

Shocking, but wholly true.

“"DNFTT"”

Since: Feb 08

Oviedo, FL

#31 Feb 20, 2009
therockofages wrote:
The hypocrisy of women is alarming. Their battle cry is 'don't hit me, don't abuse me in any manner of speaking'; all while they physically, mentally, and verbally abuse their boyfriends with impunity, evidently believing it is their God given right to do so. This is reality, the media should tell both sides of the story for a change. News flash to any male that is the recipient of female abuse; call the police and drop her like a bad habit. Demand the same human and civil rights as women demand.
You're right to a point. It's not right for either sex to hit or abuse the other, the stigma of the males doing it to females is long sewn into our heritage. It needs to stop! It's not okay to harm another human being period!!

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