What happens to relationships

What happens to relationships

Posted in the Stanford Forum

First Prev
of 2
Next Last
Going Krazy

Winchester, KY

#1 Sep 7, 2012
It's driving me crazy. New relationships are so wonderful. Why can't they stay the same forever ? Its like the new wears off and all the kisses ,sweet and sexy talking ,the wonderful love making , it all stops. Why ? I need to be loved and caressed ! I need to feel the love not just be told with a cold 'I love you'. Being told is great but I want to feel it ! I love the one I'm with dearly and am very attracted to this person ! Been together for awhile. I just want that spark back that we had . I want my partner to want me as bad as i want them ! What am I doing so wrong ? I try really hard but just end up feeling foolish !
Going Krazy

Winchester, KY

#2 Sep 7, 2012
Am I just trying too hard or are some people just more sexually attracted to something new ?? I don't get it ! I know my partner loves me but I want them to be inlove with me. All that take my breath away stuff like when its new ! Please tell me how to keep it alive because I have tried everything with this person and don't know what to do. Maybe I should just do nothing and relax ?? I know there will be smarta ss comments but bring it on .lol.. any advice is better than none .
same here

United States

#3 Sep 7, 2012
Don't know but if u figure it out please let me know . its always out with the old and in with the new. more like hang on to the old because they take care of u like a mother and have the new on the side as a playtoy . maybe thats what u should do ! gotta get a little love somewhere ! just sayin.
just sayin

Danville, KY

#4 Sep 7, 2012
My husband and I have been married 4 years and we still act like we are dating!! We still go on dates, He opens the door for me, He takes me places that we used to go when we were dating, we go to some of the same places that we used to go park. Occasionally, we will take off somewhere for the weekend and get a motel room. We don't do this every weekend or anything, but we keep the fire burning by doing things that we used to do before we got married. Seems to help keep us both happy and at home.
Any Number

London, KY

#5 Sep 7, 2012
Oxytocin. It's much higher in the beginning of relationships.
joe joe me

Winchester, KY

#6 Sep 8, 2012
Any Number wrote:
Oxytocin. It's much higher in the beginning of relationships.
you got to be a dealer so witch city government do you work for don't need any as-hole like you so why in the do you do this to ppl that needs a little help .
old man

Winchester, KY

#7 Sep 8, 2012
life togather for a man and a women always have its ups and downs so keep trying until it gets to where you can't get it back ,,, don't throw it away to soon and down the road you wish you should have tryed harder ..... wish you and who every the best of wishes .
Any Number

London, KY

#8 Sep 8, 2012
joe joe me wrote:
<quoted text>you got to be a dealer so witch city government do you work for don't need any as-hole like you so why in the do you do this to ppl that needs a little help .
A dealer? Of the "love" hormone? She asked a question. That's the REAL answer.
scott

United States

#10 Sep 9, 2012
I dont know either, i live my partner so much, more than i have ever loved anyone. He has done bad things to me that hurt way down deep, and has become superficial and materialistic. I wish that he could love me like i love him unconditionally. He says im irresponsible but im really not, ive always tried to make him happy and go without. The spark slowly demimishes.
Going Krazy

Winchester, KY

#11 Sep 11, 2012
I think it's time to let go. As hard as it's going to be I have to. I'm tired of felling hurt from the bitter coldness. I can't do it anymore. It's now more like we are siblings . It hurts when you try to come on to your partner or just kiss them and you just get a look that says " oh no . What are you doing ,please dont ! " They become all tense or make excuses .anything to avoid physical contact from me. It hurts so badly and I have delt with it long enough. Will be better to just go. I dont understand but maybe one day i will and maybe not. Its hard know that your partner and you are pretty much best friends until it comes to physical contact. This is all I know to do.
Going Krazy

Winchester, KY

#12 Sep 11, 2012
I know I shouldn't be on here with this but I have so many times tried to discuss this with my partner with no answers. Just anger. All I want to know to be able to stay ,is it me am i that unattractive ? Is there something wrong with you that your not telling me ? Is there someone else that you are seeing or hoping for ?
I can't talk to anyone else about this. I have drove myself crazy about this long enough . I will no longer allow it. Thats why I have to just go. Its not easy saying goodbye to your bestfriend. Maybe we should have just kept it that way from the beginning . Friends .
Katie Bug

Waynesburg, KY

#13 Sep 11, 2012
Going Krazy wrote:
I know I shouldn't be on here with this but I have so many times tried to discuss this with my partner with no answers. Just anger. All I want to know to be able to stay ,is it me am i that unattractive ? Is there something wrong with you that your not telling me ? Is there someone else that you are seeing or hoping for ?
I can't talk to anyone else about this. I have drove myself crazy about this long enough . I will no longer allow it. Thats why I have to just go. Its not easy saying goodbye to your bestfriend. Maybe we should have just kept it that way from the beginning . Friends .
Are they cheating? When was the last time they told you they loved you? I was done this way and they were. Look into it.
char

Kathleen, GA

#14 Sep 11, 2012
Going Krazy wrote:
I think it's time to let go. As hard as it's going to be I have to. I'm tired of felling hurt from the bitter coldness. I can't do it anymore. It's now more like we are siblings . It hurts when you try to come on to your partner or just kiss them and you just get a look that says " oh no . What are you doing ,please dont ! " They become all tense or make excuses .anything to avoid physical contact from me. It hurts so badly and I have delt with it long enough. Will be better to just go. I dont understand but maybe one day i will and maybe not. Its hard know that your partner and you are pretty much best friends until it comes to physical contact. This is all I know to do.
Your partner is cheating. No need for second guessing
I agree

Somerset, KY

#15 Sep 11, 2012
Any Number wrote:
Oxytocin. It's much higher in the beginning of relationships.
Oh Lord!!!! That "You got to be a dealer" response was to much funny. You are very educated, I appreciate that. But you need to educated yourself a little more before you vote.
From the responder who is to loud!!!!!
Katie Bug

Waynesburg, KY

#19 Sep 12, 2012
Hope they aren't cheating on you but it honestly sounds as if they are. There's so much pain that comes with that. I never realized the toll it puts someone through. My mate cheated on me and it hurts alot. Every day I think about it. What it was like with the other person, how they could do me that way, the way they done it, just everything. My heart is broken but I wear a smile on my face even though I'm dying inside. I cry about it all the time when they aren't here. Living with this shit in my head I despise it. I'm sorry for the agony you're going through.
Dr. Hunglow

Manchester, KY

#20 Sep 12, 2012
Going Krazy wrote:
It's driving me crazy. New relationships are so wonderful. Why can't they stay the same forever ? Its like the new wears off and all the kisses ,sweet and sexy talking ,the wonderful love making , it all stops. Why ? I need to be loved and caressed ! I need to feel the love not just be told with a cold 'I love you'. Being told is great but I want to feel it ! I love the one I'm with dearly and am very attracted to this person ! Been together for awhile. I just want that spark back that we had . I want my partner to want me as bad as i want them ! What am I doing so wrong ? I try really hard but just end up feeling foolish !
NEWS FLASH! relationships aren't suppose to last forever, that person is just burnt out on ya. Marriages don't have no meaning anymore. Where all just like dogs when it comes down to it, get alittle give alittle and find someone new tell they get old. Dont feel bad or sorry for yourself, get out there in the world and enjoy your life and don't get bogged down in a relationship that ain't going to last forever anyway.
I agree

Somerset, KY

#21 Sep 12, 2012
[QUOTE who="Dr. Hunglow"]<quoted text> NEWS FLASH! relationships aren't suppose to last forever, that person is just burnt out on ya. Marriages don't have no meaning anymore. Where all just like dogs when it comes down to it, get alittle give alittle and find someone new tell they get old. Dont feel bad or sorry for yourself, get out there in the world and enjoy your life and don't get bogged down in a relationship that ain't going to last forever anyway.
[/QUOTE]
Yea. The Doc is right!!! Your life is way to short to waste on someone who don't appreciate you. Think of all the folks who won't wake up in the morning. Take a deep breath and LIVE!!!! Almost everybody has experienced REJECTION. Make a fist (for anger)- open your hands - and let it go (for freedom!!!!!) Has long as your healthy you have the world. Someone one is waiting for you. Relax, and you will find what you want. But it will be when you least expect (Truly) But thats the excitement of life. Life is unpredicitable - Vs Death is soooo predicitable. Just enjoy life!!! Have fun.
I agree

Somerset, KY

#22 Sep 12, 2012
Well. I will have to say the Doc is wrong about Marriages. Some are very happy. I am. But it took 15 years to find that person. And it happened when I LEAST EXPECTED. Don't look, thats to stressful and it puts you in the "Iam desparate" mode. Just enjoy every moment you can - the rest will fall in place. I PROMISE!!!!!
Going Krazy

Winchester, KY

#23 Sep 13, 2012
I find myself worrying about the cheating thing to the point that I make myself really sick . It has happened one time (that I know of). I had a real hard time with that but did forgive so I never bring it up. Sure wish I could forget ! But I do think if I found out that was going on again that I would have a much easier time walking away this time ! Although it would hurt somewhat , I really don't think it would hurt as bad this time. I do believe I have myself prepared for it this time ! There would be no if ,ands or buts about it. There will simply be GOODBYE ! I believe everyone deserves a second chance but a second chance only. I just want some of what we had back . It doesn't have to be as intense as the beginning but a little would be nice .
Going Krazy

Winchester, KY

#24 Sep 13, 2012
scott wrote:
I dont know either, i live my partner so much, more than i have ever loved anyone. He has done bad things to me that hurt way down deep, and has become superficial and materialistic. I wish that he could love me like i love him unconditionally. He says im irresponsible but im really not, ive always tried to make him happy and go without. The spark slowly demimishes.
I'm sorry for the hurt you are going through . Being pushed away by the one that you would give your life for is a really hard thing to deal with . But like me , you need to remember that you are better than that and dont deserve to be treated this way.

Tell me when this thread is updated:

Subscribe Now Add to my Tracker
First Prev
of 2
Next Last

Add your comments below

Characters left: 4000

Please note by submitting this form you acknowledge that you have read the Terms of Service and the comment you are posting is in compliance with such terms. Be polite. Inappropriate posts may be removed by the moderator. Send us your feedback.

Stanford Discussions

Title Updated Last By Comments
Kroger-Hobby Lobby-5star intersection 18 min danvillian 5
Herbie toombs (Dec '10) 2 hr Hey 21
Should I sleep naked (Jul '15) 3 hr tom 10
Anthony Letcher (Jan '13) 4 hr Bbw 137
Redemption Road Church (Nov '09) 10 hr Child of God 118
Cattlemens ... Whats good? 13 hr fat man 6
Looking for someone to sleep with my husband Mon Big 28

Stanford Jobs

More from around the web

Personal Finance

Stanford Mortgages