A story for parents of gay or lesbian children
Posted in the St. Marys Forum
#1 Jul 2, 2013
Linda said, "We love you. Nothing will change that. But if you are going to follow Jesus, holiness is your only option. You are going to have to choose to follow Jesus, no matter what."
That was an excerpt from the article pasted below. Perhaps you have a son or daughter who is gay or lesbian? Are you wrestling with what approach you, as a parent should take, say or do? Perhaps you have a friend in that situation, or maybe you're just curious what parents do in those circumstances. Whichever the case, please take a moment and read the following remarkable true story.
"On the night of Nov. 20, 2001, a conversation held over Instant Messenger changed our lives forever. Our 12-year-old son messaged me in my office from the computer in his bedroom.
Ryan says: can i tell u something
Mom says: Yes I am listening
Ryan says: well i don't know how to say this really but, well......, i can't keep lying to you about myself. I have been hiding this for too long and i sorta have to tell u now. By now u probably have an idea of what i am about to say.
Ryan says: I am gay
Ryan says: i can't believe i just told you
Mom says: Are you joking?
Ryan says: no
Ryan says: i thought you would understand because of uncle don
Mom says: of course I would
Mom says: but what makes you think you are?
Ryan says: i know i am
Ryan says: i don't like hannah
Ryan says: it's just a cover-up
Mom says: but that doesn't make you gay...
Ryan says: i know
Ryan says: but u don't understand
Ryan says: i am gay
Mom says: tell me more
Ryan says: it's just the way i am and it's something i know
Ryan says: u r not a lesbian and u know that. it is the same thing
Mom says: what do you mean?
Ryan says: i am just gay
Ryan says: i am that
Mom says: I love you no matter what
Ryan says: i am white not black
Ryan says: i know
Ryan says: i am a boy not a girl
Ryan says: i am attracted to boys not girls
Ryan says: u know that about yourself and i know this
Mom says: what about what God thinks about acting on these desires?
Ryan says: i know
Mom says: thank you for telling me
Ryan says: and i am very confused about that right now
Mom says: I love you more for being honest
Ryan says: i know
Ryan says: thanx
We were completely shocked. Not that we didn't know and love gay people; my only brother had come out to us several years before, and we adored him. But Ryan? He was unafraid of anything, tough as nails and all boy. We had not seen this coming, and the emotion that overwhelmed us, kept us awake at night and, sadly, influenced all our reactions over the next six years was fear.
We said all the things that we thought loving Christian parents who believed the Bible, the Word of God, should say:
We love you. We will always love you. And this is hard. Really hard. But we know what God says about this, so you are going to have to make some really difficult choices.
We love you. We couldn't love you more. But there are other men who have faced this same struggle, and God has worked in them to change their desires. We'll get you their books; you can listen to their testimonies. And we will trust God with this.
We love you. We are so glad you are our son. But you are young, and your sexual orientation is still developing. The feelings you've had for other guys don't make you gay. So please don't tell anyone that you are gay. You don't know who you are yet. Your identity is not that you are gay; it is that you are a child of God.
We love you. Nothing will change that. But if you are going to follow Jesus, holiness is your only option. You are going to have to choose to follow Jesus, no matter what. And since you know what the Bible says, and since you want to follow God, embracing your sexuality is not an option."
The rest of Linda Diane Robertson's story can be read here: http://justbecausehebreathes.com
Since: Aug 12
#2 Jul 3, 2013
Sometimes we feel life is cruel, we go thru many tests for unknown reasons. If the kid wants to be a CS, so be it. Follow the word and make a choice.
#3 Jul 3, 2013
What is a cs? This article points out that a parent shoyld be happy, loving and accepting of their child. God made each of us perfect in his eyes so all should be accepted and loved for who they are.
#4 Jul 3, 2013
Wow. All parents/grandparents should read before it's too late to take something back.
#5 Jul 3, 2013
An avoidable tragedy. Thanks for posting. Maybe it will help one family one day.
#6 Jul 4, 2013
Parents must think before they speak since we cannot take back:
The stone after it's thrown.
The word after it's said.
The occasion after it's lost.
The time after it's gone.
Every person is equal and should be treated equal in the family and under all laws.
#7 Jul 13, 2013
Thank you, Church Lady for those important lessons for us all. This particular story, http://justbecausehebreathes.com will be shared and published far and wide I hope.
#8 Aug 4, 2013
The story was powerful and so are your words to live by. I'm sharing both with several people. Tks.
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