Are we defined by our past?

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Patriot Dad

Elizabethtown, KY

#1 May 10, 2013
"our past does not define us. our past only got us where we are, its not who we are" Edger Hanson .

We all have made mistakes in the past. Some more than others. Some mistakes are made in private and others become matter of public record. Some mistakes are"victimless" and some hurt many people. Some mistakes shock a town and make you hold tight to your children.

We are all taught to not judge others. We know that there is only one judge. Yet we are quick to talk about the mistakes of others, as if we are blameless. We ask for forgiveness for our sins and damnation for others?

Are we defined by our past? Can a person ever be forgiven? I sometimes think it is easier to be forgiven by God than it is by man.

Any thoughts?

“Is who I am”

Since: Aug 08

Scottsville

#2 May 10, 2013
People want to define you by your past. Your mistakes or even your triumphs, but we aren't who we were in our past. We do things every day that define who we are.
People don't forgive. People don't forget. That's how life is.
Unfortunately.
just me now

United States

#3 May 10, 2013
Patriot Dad wrote:
"our past does not define us. our past only got us where we are, its not who we are" Edger Hanson .
We all have made mistakes in the past. Some more than others. Some mistakes are made in private and others become matter of public record. Some mistakes are"victimless" and some hurt many people. Some mistakes shock a town and make you hold tight to your children.
We are all taught to not judge others. We know that there is only one judge. Yet we are quick to talk about the mistakes of others, as if we are blameless. We ask for forgiveness for our sins and damnation for others?
Are we defined by our past? Can a person ever be forgiven? I sometimes think it is easier to be forgiven by God than it is by man.
Any thoughts?
We have to forgive ourself first and the past need to be just that.If we live in the past we cant walk into our future.
My 2 cents

Lafayette, TN

#4 May 12, 2013
We ought not judge others.

Having said that -- we should be wary of those that lie, those who steal, and those who have committed wrongs against society. To do so is not judging -- it is just facing reality.

I don't know how you'd go about evaluating what your relationship to someone else ought to be without looking honestly at the things you know they have done in the past -- especially if they still continue to do them.

We all know people who are dishonest and can't be trusted, people we wouldn't loan money to, wouldn't loan our car to, people we wouldn't hang out with.

A man can make mistakes then later see the error of his ways and change, and when we see that a person has changed we should be willing to forgive.

But, It has been my experience that most people are what they are because that is what they choose to be. And though it is possible to change, most of us are what we are and seldom ever change very much.

I just don't see how you form an honest opinion of a person other than to look at what they have done in the past, both the good and the bad. How a man has lived his life does, in most cases, pretty much defines who and what he is.

Patriot Dad

Elizabethtown, KY

#5 May 13, 2013
My 2 cents wrote:
We ought not judge others.
Having said that -- we should be wary of those that lie, those who steal, and those who have committed wrongs against society. To do so is not judging -- it is just facing reality.
I don't know how you'd go about evaluating what your relationship to someone else ought to be without looking honestly at the things you know they have done in the past -- especially if they still continue to do them.
We all know people who are dishonest and can't be trusted, people we wouldn't loan money to, wouldn't loan our car to, people we wouldn't hang out with.
A man can make mistakes then later see the error of his ways and change, and when we see that a person has changed we should be willing to forgive.
But, It has been my experience that most people are what they are because that is what they choose to be. And though it is possible to change, most of us are what we are and seldom ever change very much.
I just don't see how you form an honest opinion of a person other than to look at what they have done in the past, both the good and the bad. How a man has lived his life does, in most cases, pretty much defines who and what he is.
Thanks for the reply. I agree that it takes time to earn back trust when someone makes a mistake.

I am talking about all of the people who have had their names posted on this site. I call them mistakes but really its just lífe. Life happens to all of us. We make choices. Some choices are the right ones,some are not. Everyone of us has done something,at some point in our lives that we would not want posted on this site. It might have been that drunken night out with the boys. Maybe that affair from years ago when you and your husband were always fighting. Maybe it was the night you spent in jail. EVERYONE has something.

Some get their mistakes aired on this site and I think its wrong. People can change. People can put their past behind them. We just have to let them.

Since: Jan 10

Scotts Vegas

#6 May 13, 2013
If you intended to do it, it was no mistake. It was a wrong. Enough with the copouts please.

When you hit your thumb with a hammer, that's a
mistake. If you rearend the car in front of you, that's a mistake.

Committing adultery is not a mistake, it's a wrong! And that's not a "judgement" it's a fact.

Next thing you know we will have to replace the meaning of mistake in the darn dictionary.

Since: Jan 10

Scotts Vegas

#7 May 13, 2013
My 2 cents wrote:
We ought not judge others.
Having said that -- we should be wary of those that lie, those who steal, and those who have committed wrongs against society. To do so is not judging -- it is just facing reality.
I don't know how you'd go about evaluating what your relationship to someone else ought to be without looking honestly at the things you know they have done in the past -- especially if they still continue to do them.
We all know people who are dishonest and can't be trusted, people we wouldn't loan money to, wouldn't loan our car to, people we wouldn't hang out with.
A man can make mistakes then later see the error of his ways and change, and when we see that a person has changed we should be willing to forgive.
But, It has been my experience that most people are what they are because that is what they choose to be. And though it is possible to change, most of us are what we are and seldom ever change very much.
I just don't see how you form an honest opinion of a person other than to look at what they have done in the past, both the good and the bad. How a man has lived his life does, in most cases, pretty much defines who and what he is.
I tend to mostly agree with your statement. The past indeed defines the present.

However the present does not necessarily and wholly define the future...That's all I have today.

Good day all!
Midnight Rider

Elizabethtown, KY

#8 May 13, 2013
Some people can change and move forward. On the other hand some people can't change an are deifined by there past. It all depends on the person and there experiences and what they have learned from them. That's what makes us all different.
Patriot Dad

Elizabethtown, KY

#9 May 13, 2013
Blueminer wrote:
If you intended to do it, it was no mistake. It was a wrong. Enough with the copouts please.
When you hit your thumb with a hammer, that's a
mistake. If you rearend the car in front of you, that's a mistake.
Committing adultery is not a mistake, it's a wrong! And that's not a "judgement" it's a fact.
Next thing you know we will have to replace the meaning of mistake in the darn dictionary.
I agree that there is a difference when it comes to intent. That doesnt change the fact that people use this site to bring up peoples mistakes or wrongs as you put it. Open any thread with a name in the title and you will see.

Even if someone pays their debt, some will never let it go.

You think its appropriate to air peoples business Blue?
So true

United States

#10 May 13, 2013
No , we all fall short and if we are spending our time judging others , then r we really using our time here correct?? We r all human, that's why we have flaws. We just have to try and make things right when it counts.. Nite all!!!
Repeat

Elizabethtown, KY

#11 May 13, 2013
Well some people learn from their mistakes. And some people are fakers to make you think they have changed. Thats why their names get put on here cause we call you out "Patriot Fan" and other fakers out there. If you have truely changed then no one can find out things. Maybe you should work on that. People get called out on this site cause they screwed up and got caught. I think I repeated myself enough, lol. Good Night
My 2 cents

Lafayette, TN

#12 May 14, 2013
My 2 cents wrote:
We ought not judge others.
Having said that -- we should be wary of those that lie, those who steal, and those who have committed wrongs against society. To do so is not judging -- it is just facing reality.
I don't know how you'd go about evaluating what your relationship to someone else ought to be without looking honestly at the things you know they have done in the past -- especially if they still continue to do them.
We all know people who are dishonest and can't be trusted, people we wouldn't loan money to, wouldn't loan our car to, people we wouldn't hang out with.
A man can make mistakes then later see the error of his ways and change, and when we see that a person has changed we should be willing to forgive.
But, It has been my experience that most people are what they are because that is what they choose to be. And though it is possible to change, most of us are what we are and seldom ever change very much.
I just don't see how you form an honest opinion of a person other than to look at what they have done in the past, both the good and the bad. How a man has lived his life does, in most cases, pretty much defines who and what he is.
I don't think that we ought to critical of others that we may think are doing wrong -- here on Topix. To do that, I think is judging.

As several have pointed out, we have all made some mistakes along the way. We ought not judge others, lest others judge us.

I was just trying to explain how I personally evaluate someone, by looking at what they have done (and still do) to decide if I want to befriend them or socialize with them.

If we don't choose to be a friend of someone, for whatever reason, we should just leave them alone -- as long as they leave us alone.

I think of all the commandments, "Judge Not",is probably the hardest one to obey. Even when we mean well, it is hard not judge others sometimes.

I believe that no one is immune to sinning. It is human nature to be tempted and occasionally to give in to temptation. That is true of everyone, Christians included.

I just sort of like to hang out with others who appear to live by the same set of values that I do. But I don't try to impose my values on others.

One man's idea of living normally may be another man's idea of doing wrong. We can decide that for ourselves as long as we live within the law.

In America, we are all supposed to be able to believe -- or not believe -- anything we choose to.

I think that is how things should be.

I personally think the ten commandments is a pretty good "road map" to try to live by. If we do we should be able to stay out of trouble most of the time --

-- but it won't keep people from writing about us on Topix.

Repeat

Elizabethtown, KY

#13 May 14, 2013
Apparently you must not be doing something right or you wouldn't be on this website. Think about it, have you really been honest on here. People shouldn't be gossiping but they do. It is your choice to believe it or not. Others and myself included don't need to be preached at by someone who calls themself a christian when you don't go to church part of the time. If we want to hear someone preach we will go to church. Just like I said before if you were living right you wouldn't be on here snooping around or being the person people are talking about. People had to have witnessed things or this wouldn't be discussed right now.

“Is who I am”

Since: Aug 08

Scottsville

#14 May 14, 2013
People don't change. They can learn from their mistakes, but they don't change. If someone is abusive, they will always be that way. If they are a drunk or a druggie, they will always be that way.
We can learn, but we can't really stop being who we really are.
Tigers can't change their stripes.
Patriot Dad

Elizabethtown, KY

#15 May 14, 2013
Lets be clear. My name has not been on this site. I do however know of people who have been drug through the mud.

I see that many of you do think its ok to point out the mistake,flaws, or wrongs. I think it is wrong to get on here and talk bad about others.

Why not start a thread about poeples accomplishments instead of their flaws?

Again in case you missed it, I have been very fortunate to not have had my business put on here. I choose to defend those that have.

Roam, you are wrong, people do change. If they are allowed to. Some people will not let that happen.
Patriot Dad

Elizabethtown, KY

#16 May 14, 2013
RoamingInsomniac wrote:
People don't change. They can learn from their mistakes, but they don't change. If someone is abusive, they will always be that way. If they are a drunk or a druggie, they will always be that way.
We can learn, but we can't really stop being who we really are.
Tigers can't change their stripes.
So no one has ever turned their life around? Once a drunk always a drunk? Come on. I guess there is no hope for any of us. We have all done something wrong. We are all bad and can never change. Is that what your saying?
Patriot Dad

Elizabethtown, KY

#17 May 14, 2013
Repeat wrote:
Apparently you must not be doing something right or you wouldn't be on this website. Think about it, have you really been honest on here. People shouldn't be gossiping but they do. It is your choice to believe it or not. Others and myself included don't need to be preached at by someone who calls themself a christian when you don't go to church part of the time. If we want to hear someone preach we will go to church. Just like I said before if you were living right you wouldn't be on here snooping around or being the person people are talking about. People had to have witnessed things or this wouldn't be discussed right now.
No one is preaching and just FYI going to church every week is not a requirement to be a Christian.

This is not a Christian versus Non Christian discussion. It is a discussion about something we are taught in elementary school. Its not nice to talk about people. Topix has hurt many people in this small community. I find that wrong. Many of you obviously think thats ok.

Keep gossiping and Ill keep calling it out. Gossip is wrong and deep down inside everyone knows it. Maybe this is one stripe on the tiger that can be changed.

I will wait patiently for your comments.
Patriot Dad

Elizabethtown, KY

#18 May 14, 2013
When was the last time we said something encouraging to a person we know is struggling? Why is it so easy to be negative?

WWJ

What Would Jailhouse do?
Joker

Elizabethtown, KY

#19 May 14, 2013
Pssshhh whatever, you started this post to be curious. Curiousity killed the cat. Your guilty of something here now aren't we.
Blueminer

Scottsville, KY

#20 May 14, 2013
RoamingInsomniac wrote:
People don't change. They can learn from their mistakes, but they don't change. If someone is abusive, they will always be that way. If they are a drunk or a druggie, they will always be that way.
We can learn, but we can't really stop being who we really are.
Tigers can't change their stripes.
Sorry Roam,but you will never change. Your assertions above would seem to indicate that. Who really cares? Right? I'm here to let you know most folks are not like you...I still see you and your puppets posting, all the same old crap. Call me out on that! I'll remind you back when you and your buddy were the stewsome twosome, I and a few others were always on top of your puppets calling them out. We were met with a lot of mean hateful nasty denials.

Well when uni farthead passed on so did a lot of puppets. Puppets that went with him. Of course you can deny, but the proof has been here since the instant he passed. Sorry but those of us that knew had our ways of knowing.

That's all I have for now due to time constraints. HOWEVER!, You Good People have inspired me greatly. I have so much to post on this thread now. I only hope my brain will cooperate. Focus is so difficult these days.

I'll leave with this thought...If a repeat rapist has moved into the neighborhood and almost nobody knows, this site might be a valuable rescource. If a molester has moved in, esp a repeater, this site might be a valuable rescource. There might be other unsavory characters around your family that you would WANT to know about...GOOD DAY ALL!

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