Speeders on Oliver Street

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“Analyzing Dumb Public Figures”

Since: Jan 10

Chicken Town USA

#1 Apr 6, 2012
I tell you UNA,

Those speeders on Oliver Street are out of control.

According to our hometown newspaper, poor ol Steve Anderson and neighbors have had enough.

Master Johnnie has offered to put in speed bumps.

Masterbate Wolf says there is a bad problem but I don't know what to do.

Sheriff cookie stated if he had more manpower, his deputies could park on the corner, but dare not write any of his school friends a speeding ticket.

I say we need some hillbilly road blocks.!!!!

Cows, chickens, trees, small rocks. Maybe a coon dog or two.

I know we need some mennonite horse turds to slow down those uppity yankees with their shiny new cars.

You know a little petroleum jelly spread across the road could give a slippery and orgasmic effect.

I tell you UNA, if Oliver street gets there own speed bump there will be flood gate of complaints from Sheriff cookie school friends.

It takes a lot to get that shiny car up to 80 mph just to have to slow down for a speed bump.

I wish I had a couple of those speed bumps on my pothole filled road.

I guess it is easier to install a speed bump than get Sheriff Cookie to write a speeding ticket to one of his school friends.

hehehehehehhehe
psa

Scottsville, KY

#2 Apr 6, 2012
Steve is just still upset over Sam losing the election and him losing his Special Deputy position. Also, notice that Steve objected to the speed bumps because he and his neighbors would have to deal with them too? He can speed through Oliver Street but no one else can!

“Analyzing Dumb Public Figures”

Since: Jan 10

Chicken Town USA

#3 Apr 7, 2012
psa wrote:
Steve is just still upset over Sam losing the election and him losing his Special Deputy position. Also, notice that Steve objected to the speed bumps because he and his neighbors would have to deal with them too? He can speed through Oliver Street but no one else can!
I think sheriff cookie ought to give good ol Steve his wish and slow down a few speeders with a ticket on Oliver Street.

If good ol Steve is speeding than he should get a ticket too.

That is one of the biggest problems we have with law enforcement in this county, there is no equal justice for all.

I bet good ol sheriff cookie doesn't have the balls to write tickets on Oliver Street.

To many sheriff school friends travel that road and good ol Steve drives as fast as he wants.
Hehehehehe

“Is who I am”

Since: Aug 08

Scottsville

#4 Apr 7, 2012
I don't drive that road too often, but I'm ALL FOR the speed bumps. I will drive over them, and whoever doesn't want to can drive somewhere else. I mean, come ON. You want to complain about the speed bumps?? Which do you want? Speeders. or speed bumps? Life ain't easy, pick one.
really

Westmoreland, TN

#5 Apr 7, 2012
If you want to see some speeders--- come any afternoon to the high school and watch the teens speed out of the parking lot and onto the lights.There are several of them that DO NOT need to be driving.
Dislike Speeders

Leitchfield, KY

#6 Apr 7, 2012
I really dislike speeders who fly down these little streets like they are on I65. The street I live on it awful and I am so scared one day a child is going to get hurt by one of these ignorant people. I mean really, what are they trying to prove? It is crazy. They need to slow down before they hurt someone. I wish we had some speed bumps on our street but we do not have any. All it is going to take is some ignorant fool to be speeding down our steet, have a blow out and end up in someone's yard and kill someone's child. I really wish these people would wisen up before it is too late.

“TELLING IT LIKE IT IS”

Since: Apr 09

FARTSBURG

#7 Apr 7, 2012
Chick Papa wrote:
I tell you UNA,
Those speeders on Oliver Street are out of control.
According to our hometown newspaper, poor ol Steve Anderson and neighbors have had enough.
Master Johnnie has offered to put in speed bumps.
Masterbate Wolf says there is a bad problem but I don't know what to do.
Sheriff cookie stated if he had more manpower, his deputies could park on the corner, but dare not write any of his school friends a speeding ticket.
I say we need some hillbilly road blocks.!!!!
Cows, chickens, trees, small rocks. Maybe a coon dog or two.
I know we need some mennonite horse turds to slow down those uppity yankees with their shiny new cars.
You know a little petroleum jelly spread across the road could give a slippery and orgasmic effect.
I tell you UNA, if Oliver street gets there own speed bump there will be flood gate of complaints from Sheriff cookie school friends.
It takes a lot to get that shiny car up to 80 mph just to have to slow down for a speed bump.
I wish I had a couple of those speed bumps on my pothole filled road.
I guess it is easier to install a speed bump than get Sheriff Cookie to write a speeding ticket to one of his school friends.
hehehehehehhehe
I'll tell you Chick Papa, you just might as well be whistling Dixie out your arse as trying to get anything that makes sense out of that Physical Court bunch.

At least Massa Johnny tried. Of course Masterbate Festus Hagan Wolfe doesn't know what to do. Maybe he can ask Miss Kitty while he's down at The Long Branch trying to get Ol' Doc Adams to buy him a beer and get a sniff of Miss Kittys pantaloons.

No matter what comes up Sheriff Cookie never has enough man power. He could easily park a patrol car and put a mannequin in it holding a hair dryer. Folks would think they were being clocked for speeding.

Yes, Yankee's instigate all the trouble here. Those furriners should have never been allowed to come here.

I think your Hillbilly Speed reduction ideas are much better and are almost cost free. They really need to grease the curves. I think it would be a good idea to place a toll booth about every 20 feet.

Can't think of anything to do about it, the very idea. I will take care of stuff like this when I am elected Governor of Allen County.

Ted Fartinsky
The Great Una Farter

Since: Sep 11

Scottsville, KY

#8 Apr 7, 2012
Dislike Speeders wrote:
I really dislike speeders who fly down these little streets like they are on I65. The street I live on it awful and I am so scared one day a child is going to get hurt by one of these ignorant people. I mean really, what are they trying to prove? It is crazy. They need to slow down before they hurt someone. I wish we had some speed bumps on our street but we do not have any. All it is going to take is some ignorant fool to be speeding down our steet, have a blow out and end up in someone's yard and kill someone's child. I really wish these people would wisen up before it is too late.
I don't mean no disrespect but throw you a couple of fourteen two by fours across the street and they will slow down after a couple of trips across them. If they remove them well just nail them down to the blacktop....

“Bootleggin ,Doctern, & Mayorin”

Since: Nov 10

Box Town

#9 Apr 7, 2012
THE UNA FARTER wrote:
<quoted text>
I'll tell you Chick Papa, you just might as well be whistling Dixie out your arse as trying to get anything that makes sense out of that Physical Court bunch.
At least Massa Johnny tried. Of course Masterbate Festus Hagan Wolfe doesn't know what to do. Maybe he can ask Miss Kitty while he's down at The Long Branch trying to get Ol' Doc Adams to buy him a beer and get a sniff of Miss Kittys pantaloons.
No matter what comes up Sheriff Cookie never has enough man power. He could easily park a patrol car and put a mannequin in it holding a hair dryer. Folks would think they were being clocked for speeding.
Yes, Yankee's instigate all the trouble here. Those furriners should have never been allowed to come here.
I think your Hillbilly Speed reduction ideas are much better and are almost cost free. They really need to grease the curves. I think it would be a good idea to place a toll booth about every 20 feet.
Can't think of anything to do about it, the very idea. I will take care of stuff like this when I am elected Governor of Allen County.
Ted Fartinsky
The Great Una Farter
cle,
That their manequin idear is en a good en I tell ya.
Hear in lovely Box Town we got them manequins wiff hairdryer un feller thinks they are the police wiff speed guns.
Speedun is way down hear in our fair city.
Now the toll booth were a good idear two but ever buddy is en a given out I.O.U.s .
That isen a puttin a budget crisis on our fair city.
I will vote fer ya fer governer off Allen Co. Uncle pleeze wood ya be sure un
VOTE DRY!!

“Bootleggin ,Doctern, & Mayorin”

Since: Nov 10

Box Town

#10 Apr 7, 2012
Uncle

Since: Sep 11

Scottsville, KY

#11 Apr 7, 2012
Rod Cod the 2nd wrote:
<quoted text>
cle,
That their manequin idear is en a good en I tell ya.
Hear in lovely Box Town we got them manequins wiff hairdryer un feller thinks they are the police wiff speed guns.
Speedun is way down hear in our fair city.
Now the toll booth were a good idear two but ever buddy is en a given out I.O.U.s .
That isen a puttin a budget crisis on our fair city.
I will vote fer ya fer governer off Allen Co. Uncle pleeze wood ya be sure un
VOTE DRY!!
Rod Cod, I think you got the solution, just put up a toll booth and clock them in and if they get to the other end too fast, just write them a ticket and sent it to them in the mail. If they don't pay take away their drivers licenses.

“TELLING IT LIKE IT IS”

Since: Apr 09

FARTSBURG

#12 Apr 8, 2012
Rod Cod the 2nd wrote:
<quoted text>
cle,
That their manequin idear is en a good en I tell ya.
Hear in lovely Box Town we got them manequins wiff hairdryer un feller thinks they are the police wiff speed guns.
Speedun is way down hear in our fair city.
Now the toll booth were a good idear two but ever buddy is en a given out I.O.U.s .
That isen a puttin a budget crisis on our fair city.
I will vote fer ya fer governer off Allen Co. Uncle pleeze wood ya be sure un
VOTE DRY!!
Thank You Nephew Cod. That Physical Court ain't worth a schitt. With excellent ideas from you, Chick Papa, TPR and myself we can stop this speeding schitt. As the Great One say's, drive like hell, you'll get there. I will vote dry. I am totally against legal licker sales.
Uncle Una

“Is who I am”

Since: Aug 08

Scottsville

#13 Apr 8, 2012
tinponyrider wrote:
<quoted text>I don't mean no disrespect but throw you a couple of fourteen two by fours across the street and they will slow down after a couple of trips across them. If they remove them well just nail them down to the blacktop....
LOL! I like it!

“Bootleggin ,Doctern, & Mayorin”

Since: Nov 10

Box Town

#14 Apr 8, 2012
tinponyrider wrote:
<quoted text>Rod Cod, I think you got the solution, just put up a toll booth and clock them in and if they get to the other end too fast, just write them a ticket and sent it to them in the mail. If they don't pay take away their drivers licenses.
Mr. Tinpony,
Wood you ens be interested ASS directer off traffic control hear in Box Town?
If en I kin geet Paster More Money ta geet us a grant from the goverment, we cuud geet ya a big payout.
Think it over un call me at Box Town city hall.
Only requirement fer the job, ya half ta
VOTE DRY !!

“Analyzing Dumb Public Figures”

Since: Jan 10

Chicken Town USA

#15 Apr 9, 2012
THE UNA FARTER wrote:
<quoted text>Thank You Nephew Cod. That Physical Court ain't worth a schitt. With excellent ideas from you, Chick Papa, TPR and myself we can stop this speeding schitt. As the Great One say's, drive like hell, you'll get there. I will vote dry. I am totally against legal licker sales.
Uncle Una
I think you are right Una. We should adopt a speeding law called "Me First".

Everyone for themselves.

Drive as fast as you want.

If you run over the little beggar on his way to school, you must pay the parents $10.00 for their grief.

Hehehehehe.

“TELLING IT LIKE IT IS”

Since: Apr 09

FARTSBURG

#16 Apr 9, 2012
Chick Papa wrote:
<quoted text>
I think you are right Una. We should adopt a speeding law called "Me First".
Everyone for themselves.
Drive as fast as you want.
If you run over the little beggar on his way to school, you must pay the parents $10.00 for their grief.
Hehehehehe.
Chick Papa, I thought that law was already in effect. Apparently you haven't been through the 4 way stop on the square lately. Hehehe.

Nephew Rod Cod is already looking before solutions before it hit's his Boxtown super highway.

Mayor Cod is looking for Rev. Eat Mo Money to hire as grant writer and to see if he can get some church money for his non speeding project. Rev, Eat Mo where are you?

“Analyzing Dumb Public Figures”

Since: Jan 10

Chicken Town USA

#17 Apr 13, 2012
Well Una it looks like we have an UPDATE according to our hometown newspaper.

According to County Attorney Hagenpuke: Speed Bumps are illegal if they are to far away from a school area.

This means no speed bumps for the Oliver Street area.

So how did we get a speeding bump at the YMCA???

Maybe it had something to do with some of that Turner money buying that speed bump ... lol

So what are we going to do to control those speeding cars on Oliver Street?

Well let's see ......

I got an Idea ........

Sheriff Cookie enforce the speeding laws by issuing his voter friends speeding tickets ....

hahahahahha ... that an't going to happen....

Well Stevie Anderson, I guess you now know how it feels to watch friends of the sheriff drive as fast as they want with no fear of a ticket ...

I think Sammy Carter played the same game when you were a special education deputy...

I tell you Hillbillie road blocks work really well ...

hehehehehhee
psa

Scottsville, KY

#18 Apr 13, 2012
Chick Papa wrote:
Well Stevie Anderson, I guess you now know how it feels to watch friends of the sheriff drive as fast as they want with no fear of a ticket ...
I think Sammy Carter played the same game when you were a special education deputy...
That's EXACTLY what all this is about. Steve wants to publicly "criticize" Jeff as much as possible for the next 2-3 years before the election hoping that people will hear so much about Jeff that they'll forget all we had to criticize Sam about. The number one thing to criticize Sam for: Having Steve Anderson as a Special Deputy.

“EBT ONLY”

Since: Aug 10

BOX TOWN USA

#19 Apr 13, 2012
THE UNA FARTER wrote:
<quoted text>
Chick Papa, I thought that law was already in effect. Apparently you haven't been through the 4 way stop on the square lately. Hehehe.
Nephew Rod Cod is already looking before solutions before it hit's his Boxtown super highway.
Mayor Cod is looking for Rev. Eat Mo Money to hire as grant writer and to see if he can get some church money for his non speeding project. Rev, Eat Mo where are you?
Praise be glory be ah bro.UNA been off preaching in other countries.be ah trying to get money up to slow them speeders down ah on oliver street be ah..glory cousin ROD got some ah good suggestions there be ah..bro UNA ill get with bro ED CASH and will all meet down at the church ah we all might have to go on ah oliver street be ah and lay holy hands on some of them speeders ah glory be ah.

“TELLING IT LIKE IT IS”

Since: Apr 09

FARTSBURG

#20 Apr 14, 2012
Chick Papa wrote:
Well Una it looks like we have an UPDATE according to our hometown newspaper.
According to County Attorney Hagenpuke: Speed Bumps are illegal if they are to far away from a school area.
This means no speed bumps for the Oliver Street area.
So how did we get a speeding bump at the YMCA???
Maybe it had something to do with some of that Turner money buying that speed bump ... lol
So what are we going to do to control those speeding cars on Oliver Street?
Well let's see ......
I got an Idea ........
Sheriff Cookie enforce the speeding laws by issuing his voter friends speeding tickets ....
hahahahahha ... that an't going to happen....
Well Stevie Anderson, I guess you now know how it feels to watch friends of the sheriff drive as fast as they want with no fear of a ticket ...
I think Sammy Carter played the same game when you were a special education deputy...
I tell you Hillbillie road blocks work really well ...
hehehehehhee
Yes Chick Papa I pruposed the same question to Loco LEO when he was talking about being out cleaning up Redneck speed bumps. I never did get an answer how that speed bump got in front of the YMCA.

I guess the ground farted and made the pavement bulge or it could be an attack from giant Moles. It has to be something like that, since we know speed bumps on public streets and highwys are illegal.

Maybe they could glue some of Romans recycled rumble strips to Oliver St. With Chicken schitt and Elmers Glue. These things would make the speeders teeth rattle.

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