Daughter says new girlfriend is nothi...

Daughter says new girlfriend is nothing but trouble for dad

There are 160 comments on the Chicago Tribune story from Mar 9, 2009, titled Daughter says new girlfriend is nothing but trouble for dad. In it, Chicago Tribune reports that:

DEAR ABBY: I am 20. My father, who recently turned 50, is dating a girl, "Amber," who is only 19.

Join the discussion below, or Read more at Chicago Tribune.

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Strained credibility

Parkville, MD

#1 Mar 9, 2009
Give the girl a chance??? Come on, Abby. Whatever she wants, I am certain it's not love.

“Snow days!”

Since: Nov 08

A winter wonderland

#2 Mar 9, 2009
LW1- Can we say "meal ticket"? Come on now, someone the daughter's age is just a little ridiculous.
LW3- I think Caleb needs a real fast smack upside the head.
Scubahood

Canada

#3 Mar 9, 2009
2 for 2 this week with the fake teen abstinence letters. 'inapproriate places' my ass.

“Joy is the shadow cast by pain”

Since: Dec 08

Twin Cities, MN

#4 Mar 9, 2009
L1: 50 and 19? Gross.

“Joy is the shadow cast by pain”

Since: Dec 08

Twin Cities, MN

#5 Mar 9, 2009
And I bet her answer would have been different if the genders had been reversed.

“Joy is the shadow cast by pain”

Since: Dec 08

Twin Cities, MN

#6 Mar 9, 2009
and why blame the girl with the baby? It's the dad who seems lonely enough to take advantage of a needy 19 year old mom.
mll

New Kent, VA

#7 Mar 9, 2009
Tell his lawyer? So the lawyer's going to call the father some night to say "hey, I heard you're dating a gold-digger -- want to draft a pre-nup?" Lawyers aren't allowed to directly solicit like this.

And Abby thinks the relationship is okay if the 19 year old is just looking for stability for her and her kid? That's just what the daughter is worried about -- seeking a paycheck rather than love and partnership.
Anna

Buffalo, NY

#8 Mar 9, 2009
In regards to Letter #1:

a) How could 50 and 19 be anything other than sex and meal ticket? That's such a huge age gap, I find it hard to believe they have much else in common. And, isn't it interesting Abby thinks this is fine, but if it was a 26 year-old man and a 17 year-old girl, it'd be practically illegal and completely frowned upon?

b) Don't think things will cool off or resolve themselves just because this is a "new" relationship. My father (54) had been dating a woman (28) for 3 weeks when he announced to us (his grown children) that they were engaged and would be marrying the following spring. Six days later, he called us to announce they were moving the wedding up...to the following SUNDAY. Their marriage lasted 2 tulmutous years, and it was a particularly heinous divorce. I wish I'd said something!
buh bye snow

Bedminster, NJ

#9 Mar 9, 2009
LW1: In the event your dad doesn't see this bimbo's true colors and does marry her, constantly remind her that someday soon you will settle down and start a family and she will be a grandmother. Or since he obviously likes younger women, let's find that 17 year old LW from the other day who is saving kissing for her wedding day. At least he wouldn't be getting another ready made family or any STDs, not to mention mononucleosis (aka the kissing disease) :-P
MessyONE

Bloomington, IL

#10 Mar 9, 2009
RE: LW #1

She may not be happy with the situation, but what can she do? Her dad is an adult. He gets to screw up his life in any way he wants and there's nothing his kid can do about it.

As for everyone accusing the girlfriend of being after his money...well what do you think the daughter's motivation is? Has it occurred to anyone that she's seeing her inheritance disappear if her father remarries?

I wonder what she'd say if the girlfriend was in her 30s with a teenager?
Raptor

North Chicago, IL

#11 Mar 9, 2009
LW1: Two words - Sugar Daddy

LW3: Knee him between the legs next time he touches your no no parts.

“Joy is the shadow cast by pain”

Since: Dec 08

Twin Cities, MN

#12 Mar 9, 2009
Raptor wrote:
LW1: Two words - Sugar Daddy
LW3: Knee him between the legs next time he touches your no no parts.
Seriously! When I got groped in junior high or high school, you can bet some damage was inflicted as a result. One boy on my bus got my pen shoved up his nose (he grabbed my breast). He had to go to the nurse's office. K.K. grabbed my butt in the hallway, so I racked him (for those who don't know that term, it means to hit someone in the balls) so hard he ended up in the fetal position on the hallway floor.

No, I'm not some knee-jerk feminist (although, I *am* a proud feminist). I like boys and all their no no parts. But no one has the right to touch MY no no parts without implied consent!

The sooner these girls learn to return unwanted touches with pain, the better. It'll set 'em up for marriage. ;)

“Merry Holidays!”

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#13 Mar 9, 2009
LW1: See Amy's letter. Girl is after his money or a father figure, the man is disgusting.

LW2: I'd give him written warning and fire him if it happens again.

LW3: I agree with Abby.
Marsha

New Orleans, LA

#14 Mar 9, 2009
I can't believe Abby's answer to LW1.

What are you smoking, Abby? You've said some stupid things before, but this one really takes the cake.
Renee

United States

#15 Mar 9, 2009
LW1: Ew. When was 19, I thought thirty year olds were too old. I can't imagine dating someone techincally old enough to be my Grandfather.
buh bye snow

Bedminster, NJ

#16 Mar 9, 2009
LW2 - Hooray for sensible advise. Further, if they are paying tuition, they need to set some ground rules like keeping up good grades, and set some fair curfew rules, that if he doesn't like it, he can go live somewhere else.
Raptor

North Chicago, IL

#17 Mar 9, 2009
AngelaMN wrote:
<quoted text>
Seriously! When I got groped in junior high or high school, you can bet some damage was inflicted as a result. One boy on my bus got my pen shoved up his nose (he grabbed my breast). He had to go to the nurse's office. K.K. grabbed my butt in the hallway, so I racked him (for those who don't know that term, it means to hit someone in the balls) so hard he ended up in the fetal position on the hallway floor.
No, I'm not some knee-jerk feminist (although, I *am* a proud feminist). I like boys and all their no no parts. But no one has the right to touch MY no no parts without implied consent!
The sooner these girls learn to return unwanted touches with pain, the better. It'll set 'em up for marriage. ;)
That is so awesome!! And you know the immediate pain they felt was nothing in comparison to the teasing they had to endure later.

"Haha Angela KICKED your assz beoch"
JBug

Saukville, WI

#18 Mar 9, 2009
LW1: Abby really needs to get a clue. In fact, she's put herself far below Amy in terms of bad advice. LW should be disgusted and ashamed with her father, not going around him to contact his lawyer and telling him to get to know the immature 19 year old baby mommy better.
buh bye snow

Bedminster, NJ

#19 Mar 9, 2009
Renee wrote:
LW1: Ew. When was 19, I thought thirty year olds were too old. I can't imagine dating someone techincally old enough to be my Grandfather.
Seriously! But someone posted a good point about she could be looking for a father figure. I know of someone whose father deserted them, and she always went after older men, and married one.
cheesecake chick

Spring, TX

#20 Mar 9, 2009
AngelaMN wrote:
<quoted text>
Seriously! When I got groped in junior high or high school, you can bet some damage was inflicted as a result. One boy on my bus got my pen shoved up his nose (he grabbed my breast). He had to go to the nurse's office. K.K. grabbed my butt in the hallway, so I racked him (for those who don't know that term, it means to hit someone in the balls) so hard he ended up in the fetal position on the hallway floor.
No, I'm not some knee-jerk feminist (although, I *am* a proud feminist). I like boys and all their no no parts. But no one has the right to touch MY no no parts without implied consent!
The sooner these girls learn to return unwanted touches with pain, the better. It'll set 'em up for marriage. ;)
Well, I don't know if it sets them up for marriage, LOL, but that you caused pain to guys who has no permission to touch your "no no" parts makes me happy. Any guy who would do such a thing deserves what he gets! And you got 'em good, didn't you!!!

; )

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