Author: At-Home Moms Should Work Instead

Full story: Newsday 32
"Something is very wrong with the way American women are trying to live their lives," the late Betty Friedan wrote in "The Feminine Mystique," her groundbreaking 1963 book attacking the idea that a husband and ... Full Story
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Dr Gregg in Denver

Aspen, CO

#21 Jan 7, 2008
Did people ever think that some of the problem with today's kids is that they don't get enough parental involvement because both parents work so much? So go to work and let some stranger raise your kid
One Voice

Overland Park, KS

#22 Jan 7, 2008
Charl wrote:
Being a mom at home IS work. If the mother wasn't doing it she would be paying someone else to do it, someone without that maternal bond to the child(ren).
Sometimes, working outside the home can lose a family nearly as much or more money than not working once you factor in the costs of childcare, extra medical care for illnesses caused by daycare, work wardrobe, gas, lunches out, take-out dinners, gifts for co-workers, etc. Any profit has to be weighed against the very really benefits of staying home with your children. Many moms and dads feel like it isn't worth the few extra dollars (if there would be any).
Amen to that! Every mother is a working mother.
Leave it to Beaver

Brooklyn, NY

#23 Jan 7, 2008
June said her husband was hard on the Beaver last night. She also has a nice pearl necklace every night....it doesn't get better than that....does it?
TRUTH

Auburn Hills, MI

#24 Jan 7, 2008
Dr Gregg in Denver wrote:
Did people ever think that some of the problem with today's kids is that they don't get enough parental involvement because both parents work so much? So go to work and let some stranger raise your kid
You should come to my neighborhood and see all the teens hanging around causing trouble because their house is empty and there is no parent on the premisis.
JONNY URINE

Dayton, OH

#25 Jan 23, 2008
TRUTH wrote:
<quoted text>
You should come to my neighborhood and see all the teens hanging around causing trouble because their house is empty and there is no parent on the premisis.
you should come to my neighborhood and eat my poop
sannesu

Spokane, WA

#26 Feb 1, 2008
chippa wrote:
Wow!! As I am reading these comments I am wondering if this is still 2007. I have not read the book but from what the articles that I have read I understand that the author is making a point to women that it is risky to step out of the work force. Not that being a stay at home mom is not work. I have worked in law firms for several years doing family law. I have seen many female clients that end up in financial binds because they are getting divorced and have not been in the work place for several years. And the $8.00 they will make once they get a job is not enough. Let's be realistic there are no guarentees in life and if you are relying soley on one person to support the family then you are taking a big risk. Just be aware of the consequences of your decision.
I hear that loud and clear. I am a stay at home mom. My children now are three and four, but it is still a nightmare trying to raise them, do the household, etc. On average I get about 5 hrs/sleep with the children waking me up EVERY night STILL. Going to work on top of this nightmare is unbelievable. I could simply NOT imagine it. I have to include both of my children are boys -- and very active. Before I became a mom I was a physician assistant, graduated from one of the top medical schools in the country...but really being a caring mother and getting the children to learn wisdom HAS to be THE most DIFFICULT and DRAINING job EVER. Maybe someday I could handle more, but being a stay-at-home mom WHO CARES and NEVER watches TV during the day has me wiped out. I respect every woman and her choice to work or not to work, and it is always different for everyone, and what is most important is that the child has consistency and love -- and I think it is hard to buy that in daycare. I think multigeneration families --or having family in the same city is critical -- but not always possible. I don't know the answer--maybe by the time they go to school, hopefully I could work again as I truly loved working my whole life (and yes, relying on one person, my husband, is the scariest thing I've done my whole life but I will not be in this position forever, hopefully). For all the husbands out there, shower the mother of your children -- she is more than being a saint for your children and your children's children by her example whether she is working or not! If she freaks out -- shower her with love that she desparately needs !!
Ron Paultergeist

Hartford, CT

#27 Feb 1, 2008
Women should enjoy equal pay and equal work opportunities - no glass ceilings.

That being said, society would be much better off it more mothers stayed home and nurtured their children in those critical first few years.

Reducing the supply of labor would also have the benefit of creating upward pressure for wages which would make it easier for families to get by on one income.

There is nothing dishonorable about
homemaking and raising children. It is the most important work in the world.

Why is it, you have to ask yourself, that immigrants (legal ones) from third world countries where children are raised in more traditional man/woman households are polite, better adjusted, and outscore American kids scholastically?

Men, stop spending your money on materialistic junk, forego the plasma 50 inch screen tv (toss out the television algogether) and new SUV, live modestly so you can get by on one income, and step up so as to let your wives stay home to rear your children. Hell, grow vegitables in pots and can them if you have to.

Because right now, your lazy, fat, arrogant, dimwitted, television reared brats are ruining America.
cool guy

Dayton, OH

#28 Feb 9, 2008
Ron Paultergeist wrote:
Women should enjoy equal pay and equal work opportunities - no glass ceilings.
That being said, society would be much better off it more mothers stayed home and nurtured their children in those critical first few years.
Reducing the supply of labor would also have the benefit of creating upward pressure for wages which would make it easier for families to get by on one income.
There is nothing dishonorable about
homemaking and raising children. It is the most important work in the world.
Why is it, you have to ask yourself, that immigrants (legal ones) from third world countries where children are raised in more traditional man/woman households are polite, better adjusted, and outscore American kids scholastically?
Men, stop spending your money on materialistic junk, forego the plasma 50 inch screen tv (toss out the television algogether) and new SUV, live modestly so you can get by on one income, and step up so as to let your wives stay home to rear your children. Hell, grow vegitables in pots and can them if you have to.
Because right now, your lazy, fat, arrogant, dimwitted, television reared brats are ruining America.
REPRESENT

Since: Feb 08

Canada

#29 Feb 20, 2008
Hello,

I am doing a very brief market research survey and I am looking for stay-at-home mothers who are thinking about starting their own business, or who are in the very early stages of starting their own business. The survey will take 5-10 minutes and the results will be kept anonymous and confidential.

If you are a stay-at-home mother who is considering starting a business, and would be willing to spend 5-10 answering this online survey, it is available at: http://www.metaoracle.com/samsurvey.html . Please email me at samsurvey@metaoracle.com if you have any questions.

Thank you for your time!

Dylan Kyle
MetaOracle Research
www.metaoracle.com

“Blessings to you and yours.”

Since: Dec 07

Washington DC

#30 Feb 20, 2008
In my opinion, being a nurse is the best job for parents. I have been a nurse for 12 years and have 2 children aged 6 and 3. Shortly after my son was born I started working 12 hour shifts on Saturday and Sunday. I got paid the equivalent of working full time and didn't need to pay for child care unless my husband was out of town. When my son was 3 I got offered a promotion to run a psychiatric unit and accepted the job. He started at a great preschool across the street from my job. My daughter was conceived when we celebrated my promotion. The psych unit was closed 1 week before my daughter was born and I was laid off. I signed on with a nursing agency where I get top dollar for working shifts when and where I want to. I can go weeks or months without working for the agency, or I can work 60 hours in one week. The perfect job.
I know a lot of nurses who work night shift and watch the children during the day then sleep in the evening. This or the weekend option I used to work is great for the kids, but makes it hard to enjoy your spouse. When I first stopped working weekends and went to join my son and husband on one of their Saturday fun days, my son told me to go to bed (I had worked nights and slept days on the weekends) and couldn't go with them because it was "Daddy/Ducky Day" and didn't want to share daddy with me.

Nursing allows so many options and as long as a nurse keeps a foot in the door by working agency or PRN (as needed) they can always get a job.
Anonymous

Houston, TX

#31 Apr 29, 2008
This kind of pisses me off. At home moms, as old fashioned as it is, really take care of the kids. I know kids whose parents don't work, and it's great for them because they really get to bond. This author needs to think before she speaks. Besides, it's every woman's choice. Each side has its ups and downs.
Oh Really

Bronx, NY

#32 Apr 29, 2008
I find most of the comments on this topic amusing - I would think that in this day and age more people would understand that moms working outside the home do so because it is what works best for the family, either because of economic neccessity or for a sense of personal fulfillment. Children shouldn't have to live with the legacy that mom "gave up" her career - she may have made a choice to defer that part of her life to concentrate on being the primary caregiver during "working hours", or she may have made the choice to work to help support the family. These are very personal decisions, and as a mom that has both stayed at home, and returned to work, the situation was discussed openly in our family and my husband and I let our kids know that they were always the most important people in both of our lives. Mom pitches in with the outside work, dad pitches in with the home based work, and our kids saw the balance that we were all committed to preserving. We shouldn't be so judgemental about others without knowing all of the circumstances.

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