At what point did I say that you, specifically, had made/were making any of those mistakes, or that all women in Richmond do so?
Could it be that you were confusing or combining my post with another, or did some of my points draw near a sensitive area? Could it be that your marriage began long ago, or that it eventually ended, in whole or in part, as a result of one or more of the common missteps I mentioned?
If so, do not take it personally, as we cannot undo the mistakes of our past; there is no need for defensiveness, shame or wounded pride. Face it, learn from it, see where things went wrong, where you may have rushed in or what you may have been missed or ignored way-back-when, and avoid repeating those error(s) in future endeavors.
Also, I would not mistake or tout your 20 years of marriage as experience or wisdom in "all things relationship," either. For all intents and purposes, it speaks to a lack of practical experience in matters of assessing potential partners, as you were until recently confined to just the one (and the fact that it has ended denotes an error of yours or a deficiency of his missed somewhere along the way).
Re-read my prior post and this one with more care and less defensiveness. You may find something of use.
If not, oh well.
To Voice of reason, I have you to know I am not a needy desperate woman. Or a dog. I am a very loving and nice person. A great mother and friend. Your judgement about all Richmond woman is wrong. I was married over 20 years and I am confident and secure. I have just been out of the dating game for awhile. So your judgement is a little harsh. I know there is someone out there for me.