Hey toothless trucker buddy, I'm pretty sure libs don't actually think any of those things.<quoted text>
Dear, I'm a liberal, and I think it's great to kill babies, but not dangerous murderers in prison.
I'm a liberal, and I shop at Wal-Mart, and then complain about foreign made products.
I'm a liberal, and I think everybody should contribute to my clean air and water just the way I like it.
I'm a liberal, and I think that if you make money, you're not entitled to it, but if you want money, you are.
I'm a liberal, and I think that poor people should be able to have as large of a family as they desire, but can't figure out why we didn't solve poverty.
I'm a liberal, and I think that minimum wage should be $20.00 per hour. What I can't figure out is why jobs are moving overseas.
I'm a liberal, and I think that if we tax the wealthy even more, they will just have to pay it, and it won't effect me.
I'm a liberal, and I think taking God out of schools is the right thing because we replaced that with teaching children how to put condoms on bananas.
Stick to what ya know, like peeing into empty bottles and popping No-Doz, as political satire is clearly NOT yer strong suit...