Trying to cope with an unwanted divorce

Trying to cope with an unwanted divorce

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Since: Dec 09

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#1 Feb 19, 2013
My wife wants a divorce and I do not. We could reconcile, but there are many influences put upon her where she is at. I ran for the church, and she ran for the bar. I can not give up faith that God has a miracle for us. My family says I am falling apart, and that's not far from true. I miss my wife and love her so very much, but it is starting to look like God may have something else in store for me. Any good Christian tips for letting go, while still keeping my faith that our marriage can be restored? Can I do both of those things at the same time? Any advice besides the obvious "Trust in The Lord". Please help.
Cindy

Chagrin Falls, OH

#2 Feb 19, 2013
I am sorry i don't have the answer for you but you being a christian you know everything will work out one way or another for the best. God Bless
pooter

Poplar Bluff, MO

#3 Feb 19, 2013
I know how it will go. It takes two to get married it takes one to get a divorce. You are not in control you have no choice might as well enjoy it...
Kandy Kane

United States

#4 Feb 19, 2013
pooter wrote:
I know how it will go. It takes two to get married it takes one to get a divorce. You are not in control you have no choice might as well enjoy it...
aww pooter stop talking out your ass
Truth

Sikeston, MO

#5 Feb 19, 2013
If she doesn't want you why in the world would u want her. IFU LOVE SOMEONE SET HER FREE IF SHE COMES BACK SHES YOURS IF SHE DOSENT SHE NEVER WAS !
Not totally sure

Poplar Bluff, MO

#6 Feb 19, 2013
Remind her that she made a vow before God. If she is not a Christian and is unfaithful you are safe in the divorce part. Find you a good Christian woman that will help and support you in what is important. Spreading the gospel. Not these false friendship gospel teachings that a lot of modern churches are teaching. The ones that promise everything will be great and happy as soon as you are saved. The only thing we are promised is eternal happiness and trials and persicussion while we are still here on earth.
first wife

Malden, MO

#7 Feb 19, 2013
u always love your first true love!!!!!!!!
pooter

Poplar Bluff, MO

#8 Feb 19, 2013
Kandy Kane wrote:
<quoted text>aww pooter stop talking out your ass
That's the only thing people understand! Ass speak....
first wife

Malden, MO

#9 Feb 19, 2013
Not totally sure wrote:
Remind her that she made a vow before God. If she is not a Christian and is unfaithful you are safe in the divorce part. Find you a good Christian woman that will help and support you in what is important. Spreading the gospel. Not these false friendship gospel teachings that a lot of modern churches are teaching. The ones that promise everything will be great and happy as soon as you are saved. The only thing we are promised is eternal happiness and trials and persicussion while we are still here on earth.
It's terrible when their with someone else raising their kids when they hurt their own. He was a christian and knows better.
Loner

United States

#10 Feb 19, 2013
I'm going through the same type of thing. I love my wife very much. Things got to where she wouldn't work, clean, anything... We seperated and she immediately went to work, began running with undesirable people and started sleeping with random guys, now she is coming around saying she is pregnant and wanting me to be the baby daddy. The divorce is still pending!
Guest

Dixon, MO

#11 Feb 19, 2013
Truth wrote:
If she doesn't want you why in the world would u want her. IFU LOVE SOMEONE SET HER FREE IF SHE COMES BACK SHES YOURS IF SHE DOSENT SHE NEVER WAS !
This is to me the best and most painful but honest quote I've seen for
You. Just let her know your there if she changes her mind, yes it hurts . Keep yourself busy it helps.
Sloppy Joe

Fairdealing, MO

#13 Feb 19, 2013
run like hell, there are plenty more just like her out there, and dont look back she had her chance. if she changes it will take years for her to realize what she lost
just sayin

Haslet, TX

#14 Feb 19, 2013
If your wife wants a divorce....there isnt a lot that you can do (alone) to save your marriage.

You need to decide what you want. If you want to pursue her and try to change her mind....it will be a long, hard (near impossible) road. How much are you willing to go thru while you try to get her invested in your marriage again.

You mention outside forces and alcohol. Those are situations that she has to choose to walk away from. For her. Not because you want her to.

Honestly....you would probably do better to go ahead with your life. If she works thru her problems and comes around....and you are still in the same place it may be good. If not...her loss and you have lived life instead of putting it on hold.

Pray for guidance and pray for her. then pray for what you want. Continue moving forward with your life.

Since: Dec 09

Location hidden

#15 Feb 19, 2013
I just got home and settled from the longest church service (revival), I ever attended. I was truly blessed tonight. I will be fine no matter what, God is with me. However, I feel like I will always love her, and still pray that she has a change of heart. I am in my 30s, and I know it not to late to start over, but this is stands to be my 2nd divorce, neither were my fault, but still I don't believe in divorce. You could say, choose more carefully, but I always look at the best in people and that works against me at times. God knows what should happen, and I have faith that is what WILL happen. I don't think she has cheated, but don't know for shure. She will do what her mother wants her to do, and that is sad. I don't know what to think, but I know that I love her and long for her to let God's will guide her.
Tirah

Poplar Bluff, MO

#16 Feb 20, 2013
Dear Last Rebel,

Follow your heart. Follow God and stay busy. Don't fall into the path of night clubs. It's ok to hang around with your friends, but choose your friends wisely. You will feel as though you are on a roller coaster somedays feeling good about moving on and other days feel low again (this is normal). Your wife in time will realize she has made a mistake and it may be too late for you. Stay busy, pick up a couple of gallons of paint and get to work. I was married for 20 years and when I divorced my husband I chose to take on another job and remodel...this kept me busy and gave me a social life that I could make money at while meeting new people and when I got home from two exhausting jobs I painted and remodeled my home. In the end I was labeled as slassy and a hard worker, not a bar fly or loose.
Things will work out when you let God take control.
Truth

United States

#17 Feb 20, 2013
GOD is trying to take care of u now and your fighting a losing battle you need to think about what she's doing take the stance where u don't need her and won't take her no matter what all this will be for u is trouble I garuntee u u don't need someone that doesn't want you the damage is done your young enough to start from scratch , if u don't u will wish u would have, I am 20 years older than u going though the same thing exept I wish when I had problems out of my wife 20 years ago she should have never came back, it's very hard to reclaim spilt milk!
Geez

United States

#18 Feb 20, 2013
last true rebel wrote:
I just got home and settled from the longest church service (revival), I ever attended. I was truly blessed tonight. I will be fine no matter what, God is with me. However, I feel like I will always love her, and still pray that she has a change of heart. I am in my 30s, and I know it not to late to start over, but this is stands to be my 2nd divorce, neither were my fault, but still I don't believe in divorce. You could say, choose more carefully, but I always look at the best in people and that works against me at times. God knows what should happen, and I have faith that is what WILL happen. I don't think she has cheated, but don't know for shure. She will do what her mother wants her to do, and that is sad. I don't know what to think, but I know that I love her and long for her to let God's will guide her.
So, neither divorce was your fault??? You are one of those men that NOTHING is EVER. Your fault!!! You're pathetic and maybe they both got tired if being married to a man that more of a woman than she is?? Face it dude, she out getting dick from a real man now, she gave up the "man" that has a vagina in his brain!!! Grow a pair and quit whining!!!!!!
Guest

Poplar Bluff, MO

#19 Feb 20, 2013
Justin quit talking your smack. Why don't you put the truth out there about yourself. Your a Christian guy: Get real he is definately a Christian guy he expects for the woman to kneel to everything stated in wedding vows. (Thow shall ovey) This guy is the devil in disguise and she is not hiding behind anyone or having outside influences. You just need to except the facts that you pray upon weak ladies and this one is going to stand up to you. Nobody should have to endure what you put out. The vows of a marriage does not mean you can have your cake and eat it to and go out and get drunk every night and then think you can come home and demand for this woman to suck your dick and pretty much rape her. Shame on you dude for not just admitting the reality of who you are. You think woman should obey your every deman. Go find your gay lover because in reality thats all you are is gay
Last

Sparta, MO

#20 Feb 20, 2013
last true rebel wrote:
I ran for the church
How'd that work out for ya?

Did the invisible magic guy in the sky work some mojo on your ho-ho?
Guest

Poplar Bluff, MO

#21 Feb 20, 2013
She ran for the bar??? Funny you freaking idiot quit trying to bash someone because of your own doing. She is a single mother and takes great pride in raising her kids. She don't hang out in bars but I can't wait for the day she finds a much better man that your dumb ass that even your own family can't stand.

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