interesting

Poplar Bluff, MO

#22 Jun 22, 2012
Helpme wrote:
Will my husband have to help me support my son even if he's not living with me? That's what I'm asking.
Nope. If your son has a medicaid card, YOU pay for it. Don't offer him $100 because the State doesn't count it as child support. You had better get a lawyer.
Child support is a formula, based on income, but yours will go to pay for that Medicaid. It is fair, where the boy lives, eats and uses electricity is where that "whopping" $50 will go. Why shouldn't you pay? Is the boy being cared for?
Oh well

Poplar Bluff, MO

#23 Jun 22, 2012
interesting wrote:
<quoted text>
Nope. If your son has a medicaid card, YOU pay for it. Don't offer him $100 because the State doesn't count it as child support. You had better get a lawyer.
Child support is a formula, based on income, but yours will go to pay for that Medicaid. It is fair, where the boy lives, eats and uses electricity is where that "whopping" $50 will go. Why shouldn't you pay? Is the boy being cared for?
here's the thing,u don't have your son was ordered to pay child support u can pay what the court ordered or u will go to jail or even get a felony that's the point so leave it at that.......
Helpme

Farmington, MO

#24 Jun 22, 2012
Oh well wrote:
<quoted text>here's the thing,u don't have your son was ordered to pay child support u can pay what the court ordered or u will go to jail or even get a felony that's the point so leave it at that.......
Hello, did you NOT read the post earlier??? I said I have offered money, of course I would pay my child support!!! Dumb.
guesticles

Sheridan, AR

#25 Jun 22, 2012
Helpme wrote:
<quoted text>Hello, did you NOT read the post earlier??? I said I have offered money, of course I would pay my child support!!! Dumb.
Nonsupport has to reach over five thousand before they will pursue criminal charges anyway. It sucks too that the loser not working to support himself cannot be used in court to decide the fate of your child. Your son's living conditions at his father's house can though. Food for thought.
Helpme

Farmington, MO

#26 Jun 22, 2012
guesticles wrote:
<quoted text>
Nonsupport has to reach over five thousand before they will pursue criminal charges anyway. It sucks too that the loser not working to support himself cannot be used in court to decide the fate of your child. Your son's living conditions at his father's house can though. Food for thought.
Good idea, maybe I could get custody and make him pay child support! My son does need his hair cut.
Observer

Little Rock, AR

#27 Jun 22, 2012
Helpme wrote:
<quoted text>
Hello, did you NOT read the post earlier??? I said I have offered money, of course I would pay my child support!!! Dumb.
You offered him money, but that's not a garauntee. That is not binding. If he goes thru court then he may only get $50 a month but you are obligated by law to pay that.
hmmmm

Sheridan, AR

#28 Jun 22, 2012
Don't pay anything yet.....when you go to court ask the judge for 50/50 split legal and physical custody. If you are honest in what you are saying the judge will more than likely agree to that, then both parents are financially responsible for the child when he is in their care and if your son does not like it ......tough sh!t because kids need to be taught that life is not fair and not everything is going to go their way. Good luck to you.
Observer

Little Rock, AR

#29 Jun 22, 2012
@Helpme you said "Why do I have to pay child support when my husband doesn't have a job and is living off the state"
substitute wife for husband in you statement and you will see what men have put up with for years.

Your trying to take the easy way out and want someones approval
Helpme

Farmington, MO

#30 Jun 22, 2012
hmmmm wrote:
Don't pay anything yet.....when you go to court ask the judge for 50/50 split legal and physical custody. If you are honest in what you are saying the judge will more than likely agree to that, then both parents are financially responsible for the child when he is in their care and if your son does not like it ......tough sh!t because kids need to be taught that life is not fair and not everything is going to go their way. Good luck to you.
Thank you
fyi

Sparta, MO

#31 Jun 22, 2012
Hmmmmm is right iv been through this same crap do not give him cash the state will just consider it a gift wait if you can till you get in front of a judge and also he should have to support the child as well 50/50
MEin2012

Saint Louis, MO

#32 Jun 22, 2012
She is not necessarily a bad mom. He is a teenager he wants to be where he will have the least amount of rules and responsibility.

I used to work in the child support office. The state will be coming after you for child support, since the father is getting state aid. As soon as the father adds the child to his state aid, the state will ask to establish and administrative order against the non-custodial parent. SORRY the state wants their money.

Understand that any money you give directly to the father will be considered a gift until an actual order is in place.

You really need an attorney!! A court order will override the administative State order.

Try Paul Kidwell, he is fairly new to law, but he is a good guy and will help you the best he can at a reasonable rate.
Helpme

Farmington, MO

#33 Jun 22, 2012
I will talk to one Monday and see about getting custody. I know my son thinks he knows best, but sometimes daddy's don't think about the child and what the mother has went through for 15 years raising him. Daddy is just thinking about any way he can set around and smoke more pot, get out of working, keep getting food stamps, keep going to the doctor when ever he wants cause he has medicaid. Goes and sees his syciatrist and get crazy pills, and tryes to get disability cause he's mentally unstable! While the mother of his child works her tail off to pay her bills, and not get ANY help from the state! I think I have a pretty good case here. I'll get custody of my son, make his father pay for not being there to help me raise him for 15 years.
wibble1

Poplar Bluff, MO

#34 Jun 22, 2012
Helpme wrote:
I will talk to one Monday and see about getting custody. I know my son thinks he knows best, but sometimes daddy's don't think about the child and what the mother has went through for 15 years raising him. Daddy is just thinking about any way he can set around and smoke more pot, get out of working, keep getting food stamps, keep going to the doctor when ever he wants cause he has medicaid. Goes and sees his syciatrist and get crazy pills, and tryes to get disability cause he's mentally unstable! While the mother of his child works her tail off to pay her bills, and not get ANY help from the state! I think I have a pretty good case here. I'll get custody of my son, make his father pay for not being there to help me raise him for 15 years.
Um if he has illegal drugs or medicine other than his u got this just don't give a warning or he'll cleanup. Call dfs. Once they do a drug screen your home will be the option. Not only that any father who thinks its ok to use more than likely uses around and worse yet with his son. Get him out before he becomes his dad. At 15 he still might hsve a chance
face of an angel

Poplar Bluff, MO

#35 Jun 23, 2012
Your son probably chooses to live with his dad for several reasons, but probably because he has a good relationship with him. He probably doesn't like your boyfriend either. You may have to pay some support but it may not be much, depending on the judge and the law. It used to be around 17 percent of your pay, or that's what my husband was supposed to pay. He didn't because he wouldn't. He said if I asked for more, he wouldn't pay any. It should be worth something to you to see that your son is provided for though. You can make him show proof of what your support goes for or used to.

Since: Sep 11

Location hidden

#37 Jun 23, 2012
MEin2012 wrote:
She is not necessarily a bad mom. He is a teenager he wants to be where he will have the least amount of rules and responsibility.

I used to work in the child support office. The state will be coming after you for child support, since the father is getting state aid. As soon as the father adds the child to his state aid, the state will ask to establish and administrative order against the non-custodial parent. SORRY the state wants their money.

Understand that any money you give directly to the father will be considered a gift until an actual order is in place.

You really need an attorney!! A court order will override the administative State order.

Try Paul Kidwell, he is fairly new to law, but he is a good guy and will help you the best he can at a reasonable rate.
DO NOT USE PAUL KIDWELL!!!! He did one thing for me in getting a reduced rate on support but that was ALL. My ex got to claim them every year in taxes, etc. STAY AWAY!!!
WoW

Poplar Bluff, MO

#38 Jun 23, 2012
Helpme wrote:
Okay, so me and my husband Have separated. He has my 15 year old boy with him. He filed for child support and I got papers to fill out today. I called him and told him i would give him 100$ every time i got paid and he said no. And he said hes going to let the court handle it. But the problem is, he lives with his mom, he gets food stamps, and has Medicade, he has no job, he has no payments. He filed for disability for depression and anxiety. But I know for a fact he works under the table. So my question is does he also have to support my son? Or can he keep living off the state while half my paycheck gets sent to him?
Minus the disability thing, my ex-wife did this same exact thing. Sad point. If you're ordered to pay CS you gotta pay... But maybe since you are a female they won't pursue you. I'm not sure if the rumors that they go after the noncustodial dads work the same for mothers.
mirror image

Saint Louis, MO

#39 Jun 23, 2012
i feel for you,i am a man and was in a situation much like yours.the differences were that my son was only 7 and that me and his mother were not married.first of all the courts have not ordered you to pay anything,so don't.but here is the problem with that.your ex may push your son to not see you if you don't think that would happen then stop paying anything to your ex.if you give anything give it to your son.the other problem is your sons age.he can file within a year to be independent of both of you.there is a legal term which eludes me at the moment.if you believe your ex is doing illegal drugs or has even filed as you have said for disability for mental issues go to juvy and have them investigate and at the same time call legal aid and put them all together and they may take up your case.if you get legal aid of Missouri he can't.i know i did this and was one of only a handful of cases that won.but a word to the wise be prepared for a long tough fight.my personal advice to you is to stay as close to your son for the next couple of years and don't talk bad about his father and in the end things will work out.remember this always that no matter what, the courts will do what they think is best for the child.not either of you.best of luck and keep your chin up.
WoW

Poplar Bluff, MO

#40 Jun 23, 2012
guesticles wrote:
<quoted text>
Nonsupport has to reach over five thousand before they will pursue criminal charges anyway. It sucks too that the loser not working to support himself cannot be used in court to decide the fate of your child. Your son's living conditions at his father's house can though. Food for thought.
My C.S. was only $800 behind when Missouri went after my driver's license. That was 3 months behind at 266 a month. But like I said before I am a male, and the state isn't all that kind to men.
WoW

Poplar Bluff, MO

#42 Jun 23, 2012
JAMES wrote:
<quoted text>It does'nt matter man or woman the state will go after child support.
Sure... I mean, not that I don't believe you, only I've never seen it happen... Ever.
for the kids

Poplar Bluff, MO

#43 Jun 23, 2012
People are forgetting that child support is for the kids. People whine about their taxes, but it's when deadbeat dads won't pay that the state has to step in. If you are behind on your child support, I don't blame them a bit for going after your license.

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