Does anyone else have mean, deceitful...

Does anyone else have mean, deceitful step-children?

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Sick of it

Point Pleasant, WV

#1 Apr 5, 2011
So tired of his kids lying, stealing, causing trouble for everyone on the family. Am I the only one with this problem?
snickerdoodles

Gallipolis, OH

#2 Apr 5, 2011
how old are they?
mad momma

Brooklyn, NY

#3 Apr 5, 2011
OMG I do!! Awful the way some kids act nowadays, but it just goes to show the terrible parenting going on at home and it is hard to really discipline kids u don't live with if they live kinda far. You cannot blame the kids 100% tho, we don't really spank but a child is never to old for a good old fashioned whooping.
Sick of it

Point Pleasant, WV

#4 Apr 6, 2011
Mine are 17, 19 and 22. They do anything and everything they can to stir up trouble. I know a lot of it is because their mother puts them up to it, but they are old enough to know better.

I have been around them for 7 years and it has been awful for most of those 7 years. I have honestly considered divorcing him just so I wouldnt have to put up with his kids.....he doesnt do much to stop the situation either.
mad momma

Brooklyn, NY

#5 Apr 6, 2011
I totally get where u r coming from sick of it!!
Sick of it

Point Pleasant, WV

#6 Apr 6, 2011
What are we suppose to do. I love my husband, but the trouble never ends. I never imagined a relationship would be torn apart because of the kids. I obviously had no clue.
I had 2 kids from my previous marriage and they just believe the things his kids do. They have stolen tools, clothes, jewelry and money. He wont do anything to them.....tells them not to do it again. While my kids were raised in a strict environment and his can do whatever the desire and not get into trouble....mine are getting confused!
I try so hard to raise them right but it is getting harder with these things going on.
Blinded by love...dont know if its worth it anymore......
mad momma

Brooklyn, NY

#7 Apr 6, 2011
Yep I am at a loss too and I would really like someone to answer that question for me. In your situation I would tell him they are not welcome in your house if they cannot respect you and your things anymore until they can change their ways two of ur step children are past court ordered visitation age anyways. Our kids are being raised the way we were (I would not say strict but not where they are ruling the home) but I cannot say the same for the other child who is honestly outta control and I would like to find a nice paddle and put it to good use or have the child's father do so. If all else fails and you can prove they are breaking laws by stealing etc press charges and have them arrested. If you are already willing to divorce him over the children might as well go out with a bang either that or hide your valuables when they are coming for a visit they r too old to learn now.
Sick of it

Point Pleasant, WV

#8 Apr 6, 2011
Well, at least I know I'm not alone. Sometimes it sure feels like it.
He is on my side until the kids show up, then all the rules go out the window. I told him I would press charges and he told me too, but I know he and his parents would turn on me instead of standing up to the kids. His philosophy has always been " I dont want to hurt their feelings".....the heck with everyone elses!!
I know a lot of it is their mom, but they are too old to use that excuse anymore. Mom calls saying there is something wrong with one of the kids just so he will call her then she moans and groans about everything and how he has a "new family" now and how his kids resent that....even though she has remarried! I would understand if it was a new relationship....but its been 7 years now....ugh!
snickerdoodles

Gallipolis, OH

#9 Apr 6, 2011
I feel for ya sick of it...but it's not always the biomom totaly to blame...I think it is harder on older children to accept divorce issues than younger children...My stepson is 9 now and he was only 1 and a half when his parents divorced...She has tried to ruin every relationship my man has had ever since...Some of the women he was with actually tried to be her friend and I think she expects it from all of us...lol it isn't going to happen here...she has sit and talked to me about all the bad things she herself percieved about him as though it was gonna make me leave him...She tried to make her pressence known everyday by calling and she used the child to attempt to have contact with his daddy...She would have her mother call me and tell me things like...so and so is still in love with so and so (my man)...They would leave asshole messages on our answering machine and when she had full custody of him she would keep him from us when she got pissed off at us...my man has full custody now and things are getting better...My man controls things now and he has been wonderful about respecting me when it comes to her...I don't know if I am right but I think all children of divorce harbor emotions that they want thier bioparents to reconcile and be a family again...I can't imagine children of your step childrens age defying things, are they into drugs? usually children who steal from parents do it to support a drug habit...when did it start?
mad momma

West Chester, OH

#10 Apr 6, 2011
To hell with what he and his parents would do. If he were totally devoted to you he would not care what his parents said he would stick by your side. I know my husband would take my side over anyone else's and he has before because I come first along with our kids. Put ur foot down girl tell him they r not welcome there anymore until they repay you for the things they have stolen or until they change their ways they r older now and visiting you both regularly should be a pleasure not a pain. You will end up resenting him if you dont stick up for yourself!! Otherwise throw them in jail!
Lila Yee

Lake Forest, CA

#11 Jul 7, 2011
I got to tell you, I can not believe how step children, even teenagers can be so mean and manipulative. Unbelievable!!!! My husband's kids are LAZY, RUDE, INCONSIDERATE, AND THEY ARE ALWAYS LYING ABOUT ME. I get blamed for taking an I-pad and taking their things which I have not idea where the things went. Unbelievable.
Sling Blade

Point Pleasant, WV

#12 Jul 8, 2011
I know this family out of Rutland that has step children on both sides. None of them live at home. I don't know much about his grown kids but, I do know about hers. These grown kids hers are living nightmares from hell. They have been in and out of jail like a revolving door. Drugs,stealing not alcohol is the main stream of their lives. Her kids steal them (parents) blind. I know who these people are. They need to lock them up and throw away the keys. They both have good jobs and broke all the time due to her kids. This couple will never get no where in life as long as her misfit kids are loose!I myself point blanked them. If I ever see or catch you on my property just call the meat wagon, cause your going to need it.
WOW8079

Innisfil, Canada

#13 Jan 14, 2013
I sure do! If they can't get what they want from this house hold, just put on the tears, call mommy, tell her lies to get what ever they want from her! Unfortunately, one lie spawns another just to keep the first lie alive! We were told lies from one stepdaughter about her mother and step dad so she could try and get what she wanted from us, but we chose to ignored them, knowing they were lies. she turned around and told the same lies to her mother about her father and I. Her mother believed her and in the end she gets what ever she wants. It's been over a year now, and she hasn't come here since, but the lies continue and are growing! Why can't anyone else see the deception?
Louise Tran

Quincy, MA

#14 Jan 30, 2013
Its unbelievable how kids are manipulative. In my house I am the step mother of the four. And the second oldest has always had a mean side. He plays it everytime he gets a chance and takes advantage when my husband is not around. Lately when I tell the husband what is happening... he is telling me I am blowing things out of proportion. And that the kid has not done anything wrong. I am tired of all of this and I seriously thinking to go separate ways. We have been together for almost 10 years and married for 6. SAD
One too

New Haven, WV

#15 Jan 31, 2013
I have a step son who is the same way. He wasn't always like this. Just when the "new wore off" if ya know what I mean. At first he was an angel. But once I started enforcing rules and making him listen I suddenly became the evil step mother. I love my family even the it is blended. I'm not going to give up. I keep telling myself that one day hopefully sooner then later he will look at all this and think me for everything. I know exactly what you all are going through. Don't give up or give in. That's what they want. Keep your head held high and keep pushing forward. It will work itself out in the end. God bless each and every step parent out there. Love is an awesome bond don't let jealousy and hate break it. Stay strong. Lots of love and prayers.
Grandma

United States

#16 Jan 31, 2013
Louise Tran wrote:
Its unbelievable how kids are manipulative. In my house I am the step mother of the four. And the second oldest has always had a mean side. He plays it everytime he gets a chance and takes advantage when my husband is not around. Lately when I tell the husband what is happening... he is telling me I am blowing things out of proportion. And that the kid has not done anything wrong. I am tired of all of this and I seriously thinking to go separate ways. We have been together for almost 10 years and married for 6. SAD
I was with my ex for 13 years of hell with step kids. I was told the same thing as you every time I finally left. The worst of the two is now in the state pen for child molesting. Karma got her ass.

Since: Dec 11

Point Pleasant, WV

#17 Jan 31, 2013
I know you are all a bunch of poor victims, but aren't you suppose to be the adults in this relationship? That means being more than just older. It means figuring out a way to be the best person you can possibly be, a good role model, and a loving parent. Your role is to be patient kind and loving to kids who have had their worlds and security rocked for some reason. They aren't as sinister and evil as you portray them to be. They are mixed up kids who need good, loving, understanding, patient adults in their lives to provide them the security they lost. Stop bitching about the kids and look in the mirror. Stop judging kids for acting out while you ADULTS come to topix to act like children.
agree

Mechanicsville, VA

#18 Jan 31, 2013
You hit the head of the nail on that!! Great job,!!!!!!!! Hopefully they listen cause this world is crazy enough by time they are adults who knows what the hell will be!! You cant exspect a apple to fall from a turnip tree and what they see and hear is what they will be like as adults
Grandma

Athens, OH

#19 Feb 2, 2013
Yeah let's see how patient and kind and all that crap you are when the evil step kid sets her bedroom closet on fire because she got in trouble for molesting your dog and when you force her into therapy for treatment of whatever would make her act like such you then listen to name calling, having items thrown like tvremotes kitchen trash cans jewelry boxes etc etc at you for no reason. No punishment ever issued court ordered probation which amounted to going and playing with other kids and sent away for the weekend after she ran away and was found in a strange mans apartment she ran away because she got into trouble for cutting up new clothes that the wonderful (sarcasm) probation people took money and spent 500 on new clothes to reward her for getting into trouble so much. Her weekend away punishment from the probation people was a trip to the state fair and more county money blown. Yeah let's see how patient you would be.
Grandma

Athens, OH

#20 Feb 2, 2013
That is one demon that needed locked up long ago but the pussy ass juvie system is to stupid to lock them up for long term daily therapy. Instead they assisted in this child growing up knowing they are above the law and now this demon is doing some hard time for molesting repeatedly a little 10 year old girl after the demon turned 18. Had the juvie system gave the help when they were repeated asked for it then this one would not have believed they are above the law and NO she was not in my home when she started molesting the little girl she had been shipped out if state as far away from me as possible to her grandmother who had nothing but issues out if her from day one hell after the law picked her up for questioning in the morning she was in the pool come afternoon with 2 underage boys. Very little regard for the law that's how delinquents stay delinquents a weak law system who does not enforce standards and offers parents zero assistance when turned to numerous times

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