husband and wife sleeping in different rooms

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confused

Elkhorn City, KY

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#1
Feb 11, 2011
 

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does anyone think that if two people are married and have been for along time, yes we have small children, but we sleep in different rooms. is something wrong with us, or him cause i want him to sleep with me, but he says all kinds of different things to sleep in the livingroom, do you all think hes cheating, or just not interested in me no more, please help.
bitter beer face

Pikeville, KY

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#2
Feb 11, 2011
 
Same here and all the above !
Hmmm

United States

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#3
Feb 11, 2011
 

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Married people may sleep in separate rooms for a number of reasons. Some people snore so loud, it's impossible for the other to get any sleep. Some people have back problems, and sleeping alone is much easier on a person's back. Some people are restless sleepers, constantly tossing and turning, which disrupts the other person's sleep.
You would think that none of the above, however, could be any worse than sleeping in the living room on the couch unless, of course, you have a very comfortable couch.
Have you noticed any big change in his behavior toward you other than the above issue? Are the two of you still intimate or has that changed in any way?

His reasons for sleeping in the living room could be totally innocent. If not, you will know sooner or later.
me too

Pikeville, KY

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#4
Feb 11, 2011
 

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We do too, we also have small kids and I think it is pretty common.
Well

United States

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#5
Feb 11, 2011
 

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We don't have kids but I often go the couch after he goes to sleep. He wants me in the bed so he'll get up and come hunt me down. But I seem to sleep better by myself. I guess when he moves it disturbs me so I don't sleep well. And there's nothing wrong with our marriage and we have a king size bed. So I don't know what my problem is. My grandparents were together almost 75 years and slept every night spooned in a full size bed. They couldn't sleep without each other. I kinda wish I was like that but I like it by myself.
me too

United States

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#6
Feb 11, 2011
 
Well wrote:
We don't have kids but I often go the couch after he goes to sleep. He wants me in the bed so he'll get up and come hunt me down. But I seem to sleep better by myself. I guess when he moves it disturbs me so I don't sleep well. And there's nothing wrong with our marriage and we have a king size bed. So I don't know what my problem is. My grandparents were together almost 75 years and slept every night spooned in a full size bed. They couldn't sleep without each other. I kinda wish I was like that but I like it by myself.
Things are not the same as they use to be. I guess everything works different for everyone.
confused

Elkhorn City, KY

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#7
Feb 11, 2011
 
ok i see now, it really sounds as if everything is ok, yes our sex life is still great, he wants it more than me, lol and he does have problems sleeping, hes up and down all night, so i guess i have nothing to worry about, thanks.
married feeling invisable

Harold, KY

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#8
Feb 11, 2011
 
My husband & I have been married only 4 yrs., we have a 4 & 2 yr old & both sleep in the bed with us! I am going crazy, I want them in their rooms so bad, but he makes me out 2 be the mean parent. I love my kids more than life!!! I would lay down & die in a second 4 them, but I feel both of them r plenty old enough 2 be sleeping by theirselves. NOw every since I got pregnant with my 2 yr old, he has wanted nothing 2 do with me. But he lets me keep every dime of his check, I just give him gas money everyday. I really don't think he's cheating, I did at first now after over of 2 aganizing yrs I finally believe he's not. I am tired of feeling ugly, & not wanted. I try hard 2 keep up my appearance. for nothing but my own self esteem. Am I wrong 4 wanting 2 feel wanted?
i know too

Prestonsburg, KY

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#9
Feb 11, 2011
 

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married feeling invisable wrote:
My husband & I have been married only 4 yrs., we have a 4 & 2 yr old & both sleep in the bed with us! I am going crazy, I want them in their rooms so bad, but he makes me out 2 be the mean parent. I love my kids more than life!!! I would lay down & die in a second 4 them, but I feel both of them r plenty old enough 2 be sleeping by theirselves. NOw every since I got pregnant with my 2 yr old, he has wanted nothing 2 do with me. But he lets me keep every dime of his check, I just give him gas money everyday. I really don't think he's cheating, I did at first now after over of 2 aganizing yrs I finally believe he's not. I am tired of feeling ugly, & not wanted. I try hard 2 keep up my appearance. for nothing but my own self esteem. Am I wrong 4 wanting 2 feel wanted?
I am the one who started the married but...thread for just about the same reasons...maybe just wanting output.
My wife and I 3 years with kids, we don;t sleep together to much for this or that reason. anyway I know I am not hard to look at by any means so what is going on? I think shes cheating, then no, then maybe, then...GThe truth is regardless I'm tied of feeling this way I remember what it was like to want to be with someone. I don'y want my home life to end I love my kids so I think If I could see someone outside the marrage then It would make everything ok. And if she is seeing someone then fine i"ll be too. The bottom line is I want to feel wanted again and I want to feel what it's like caressing a womans body again...I just don't know if I can do that with my wife anymore, I'm getting seared with the turn off and lack of that special touch . I need to be with someone again and feel that.
Thats how I feel.
Citizen 2

Glenwood, WA

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#10
Feb 11, 2011
 

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We have a small baby,but we still sleep in the same bed as the baby.It is tough some nights to get any sleep and we both sometimes have to get out of bed with the baby because he is attached to both of us.I would not have it any other way!I did the different room with my first wife because I worked for Massey and it was long and miserable hours,but I also think it hurt our marriage.So,now I tough it out and help her as much as I can so that I can be close to them and have a loving relationship with my family.It seems to be working.She cannot sleep unless I am in the bed and I have found that it is virtually impossible to go without my baby around me at least 16 hours out of the day.It is a blessing from God himself!
confused

Elkhorn City, KY

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#11
Feb 11, 2011
 
i feel the same, i want to be kissed again, something he never does, i want to be loved on, all the things we did years ago, when i started this thread i was forsure i was the only one feeling this way, now i know theres more out there with the same problem with their spouse, what can i do to get what i need from him, i love him more then life, but i'm human.
still

Prestonsburg, KY

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#12
Feb 11, 2011
 
Citizen 2 wrote:
We have a small baby,but we still sleep in the same bed as the baby.It is tough some nights to get any sleep and we both sometimes have to get out of bed with the baby because he is attached to both of us.I would not have it any other way!I did the different room with my first wife because I worked for Massey and it was long and miserable hours,but I also think it hurt our marriage.So,now I tough it out and help her as much as I can so that I can be close to them and have a loving relationship with my family.It seems to be working.She cannot sleep unless I am in the bed and I have found that it is virtually impossible to go without my baby around me at least 16 hours out of the day.It is a blessing from God himself!
not really the same but I liked the story...
Citizen 2

Glenwood, WA

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#13
Feb 11, 2011
 
confused wrote:
i feel the same, i want to be kissed again, something he never does, i want to be loved on, all the things we did years ago, when i started this thread i was for sure i was the only one feeling this way, now i know theres more out there with the same problem with their spouse, what can i do to get what i need from him, i love him more then life, but I'm human.
There really is no advice any one person can give another in a position like this.I have been on both sides and seen how hard it is to work out some differences.But the 1 thing that I have learned from my past is to try something,over and over if you have too.There is no worse feeling in the world than to have to wake up 1 morning and start completely all over with nothing and no one!So all I can say is best of luck,try to talk to your other and work with them in a way that will get there attention.The first failure was my fault,the next won`t happen if it is up to me!God bless and good luck!
seven year itch

Elkhorn City, KY

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#14
Feb 11, 2011
 
Is this true? Jan. made seven yrs. and we have a five yr. old girl that thinks daddy is the sun moon and stars, We have a sectional cough and I have my end he has his and she is in the middle. The baby is close to us both, We never talk anymore he 38 yrs. old and is disabled from mines and always is home so am I so noone is cheating, We never talk, we communicate with her about her but when she goes to school, silence! Any advice?
Citizen 2

Glenwood, WA

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#15
Feb 11, 2011
 
Maybe you could beef up the relationship by taking little trips to lakes,scenic outdoor rides,fairs,etc.That is really a tough one .When the only complaint is not enough conversation.It is very touch and go.
I am thinking

Prestonsburg, KY

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#16
Feb 12, 2011
 
seven year itch wrote:
Is this true? Jan. made seven yrs. and we have a five yr. old girl that thinks daddy is the sun moon and stars, We have a sectional cough and I have my end he has his and she is in the middle. The baby is close to us both, We never talk anymore he 38 yrs. old and is disabled from mines and always is home so am I so noone is cheating, We never talk, we communicate with her about her but when she goes to school, silence! Any advice?
I am thinking of an affair, I started yhe married but...thread. I don;t see how else I can keep my marrage happy.

And I understand the no communication thing I know it is more than the only thing wrong it the last resort. my wife and I go through that every couple months and I hate it.
Make Some Sense

Annville, KY

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#17
Feb 12, 2011
 

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I and my wife have been together for 25 yrs and for most of those years I have worked 12 hr night shifts. We have gotten used to sleeping in different rooms due to our sleep/work schedules, so yes people with a good marriage do sometimes sleep in different rooms
Lawyer

Ashland, KY

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#18
Feb 12, 2011
 
Everyone on here is experiencing normal stuff you all need to see a councilor. It saved my marriage. Cheating will only hurt your soul. The guilt will eat you alive don't do it
Well

Georgetown, KY

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#19
Feb 12, 2011
 
It is normal to change the way you do things. Why go to a councilor? Its normal why would you need to go. You know if there is a problem. There are other signs that go along with it. I'm the one who goes to the couch and I can guarantee that there is no other man in my life. I just get better rest if there is no one touching me when I sleep. I sleep light so if he moves I'm awake. I do cuddle and stay against him til I hear his breathing get steady and I know he's asleep them I move over in the bed or go to the couch to go to sleep. That is til he wakes up and runs me down and drags me back to the bed and the process starts over again. He goes back to sleep then I'm back in my corner.
big dickens cider

Richmond, KY

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#20
Feb 12, 2011
 

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just last night i banged a housewife while her husband was in the next bedroom watching american pickers. she really started howling and he asked her what was going on? she told him she was watching jersey shore....works everytime!

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