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AnonfromKy

Lexington, KY

#75 Sep 29, 2013
My ex and i were never married...we were both 19 when i found out i was pregnant... looooong story short....he moved in with my family. he cheated on me the whole pregnancy and denied it until i caught him red handed! i kicked him out. we got back together and tried to raise her together after he missed out on the first 6 months of her life. then 6 months later he abandoned my 1 yo daughter and I in Fl and went to ky to be with his family...he came and got us blah blah blah...i tired for my daughter, i grew up with out a dad. any ways. i left him and we agreed to share custody. he went through a million women...stopped letting me see my daughter...i married. had a son, took my ex to court. we settled outside of court. i get her on the weekends during school and then all summer. he just married a 19 year old. she told me i was never going to see my daughter again. that i should have never been alowed to have kids, and that she is now her mom, not me. blah blah blah. all in txt messages. didnt let me see my daughter for 9 months. now his wife is preggo, and she cant handle my daughter, working and being a wife...so my ex just dropped my daughter off at my house the other day saying he was sorry for everything??? i HATE his new wife, she kept me from my daughter for almost a year...then washes her hands clean of her because shes going to have a lil one of her own?! i tried to be reasonable. but in situations like this, well i think the new wife should keep her nose out of the past agreements.
BLissa

Columbus, OH

#76 Oct 24, 2013
A new wife wrote:
not a lot of us wives who marry a man that has previously been married want to always bash the ex wife, a lot of us have experienced difficult and annoying situations with the ex wife. Many of us would only hope that the ex wife is going to be easy to get along with especially when you have to deal with the ex wife because of the children or old debts. Actually the entire time I have been married, I have been trying to escape from having to deal with the ex all together but it is very hard to do when the in laws put a strain there because they cant seem to keep there nose out of each others butts. So to all those ex wifes who are great at being understanding.. non obsessive and really move on from the past THANK YOU and to those who don't that is a concern why let someone go if ya still try to call them, write them, talk about them negatively and whatever the sort. Your just putting a damper on other peoples lives.
I know this is a billion years old, blah blah blah.
But for people who stumble across this, I just have to point out that the average height/weight of a 10 year old boy is 4.5 feet and 70 lbs. So for the step woman who was pointing out her step sons height/weight, your argument is ridiculous.
Please step-mothers, know your place. No matter what you've heard about the first wife and the mother of the children, you need to remember that your husband has no reason to make his ex look good. Like it or not, you're not the mother, you're the wife of their father. The first wife and the children did not choose you. Be respectful, don't try to take the place of their mother and they might learn to tolerate, like or even love you someday. Say awful things about their mother and they will hate you for sure, they WILL figure it out eventually.
New wife

Pikeville, KY

#77 Oct 25, 2013
BLissa wrote:
<quoted text>
I know this is a billion years old, blah blah blah.
But for people who stumble across this, I just have to point out that the average height/weight of a 10 year old boy is 4.5 feet and 70 lbs. So for the step woman who was pointing out her step sons height/weight, your argument is ridiculous.
Please step-mothers, know your place. No matter what you've heard about the first wife and the mother of the children, you need to remember that your husband has no reason to make his ex look good. Like it or not, you're not the mother, you're the wife of their father. The first wife and the children did not choose you. Be respectful, don't try to take the place of their mother and they might learn to tolerate, like or even love you someday. Say awful things about their mother and they will hate you for sure, they WILL figure it out eventually.
I'm a stepmother we've had custody of the child for 4 years now. The child's mother barely ever sees him because she is constantly in and out of jail. We got custody because she was in and out of jail and because she beat the child. After 1 year of the child leaving with us he asked if he could call me mom, I told him he could call me anything he wanted. I cook for the child, I support him financial and even take care of medical expenses. I love him like he is my own. The way I see it if the real mother can not step up and be a mother then someone has to. So stepmothers do know their place and obviously it's to take care of the child. I don't see what the big deal is anyways as long as the child is taken care of.
angela

Fort Qu'appelle, Canada

#79 Apr 17, 2014
I thank you for your words, I thought I was alone! My husband & I have 6 kids (3 each) and a baby together. His ex is a person who is hateful, selfish & resentful of me, no matter how much I tried to be there for her & the kids, even tried to mediate between them! In the 12 years we have been together, she has been in at least 6 common law break ups, and is lonely & an alcoholic. It sucks because she makes the kids believe I am bad, and she is a victim always.....(never!). She lies, talks bad about me to everyone to the point where her co-workers tell me they are sick of it.....she kicked her kids out to me when they were rebellious and unruly after she TAUGHT them to smoke weed/drink, mess around with bad kids (her example of being a party person), then, when I finally clued in she just wanted to invade my household, I stopped having anything to do with her, and her kids moved back in with her. She collects rent from them since we are done paying her (they are grown past 18)....but she lies about me to them. I gave up, I live in peace & stay out of the kids lives because of her. It sucks for my husband and our new son. I get along great with my ex & his new wife, but she....is impossible. Until she is happy, she will make my life hell. So....because of her, the kids suffer. They don't see their dad as much (they won't come to our house), and I get the peace & quiet, and my hubby & I have learned to form our own life, with the visits we get from the kids at their leisure. My husband used to blame me for it, until I proved to him it was her by letting him go...I literally told him I'd never make him choose between my son, myself & his ex/kids. That made him realize the games she was playing, and we've been happy ever since. The ex who is bad is usually bad for a reason.....a good reason, that the new wife CANNOT control or change. Just keep strong boundaries, and trust that God is in control. Pray. Good hearts/intentions are blessed; selfish & corrupt are alone and will not change.
noteasybeinganewwife wrote:
It is not easy at all being the new wife. I remarried after my first husband cheated on me and married a guy that had kids. His wife went out on him numerous of times til he had had enough. They divorced and had been divorced for years before i even came into the picture. Now the ex-wife is jealous as hell. I guess she thought she could date and mess around and he couldnt. Guess she thought he still wanted her. She is always trying to show up at things saying the kids have a right to see their dad. Yes they do, but not her. She can drop off her kids and come back and get them. INstead, she sticks around. like his family still cares about her. which they dont. They do not like her because of what she done to their son. But now the kids have had their heads full of lies and crap and it is very hard to be the new wife. Do not know why ex's think they can have the cake and ice cream too.
Deb

Ogden, UT

#80 May 18, 2014
I don't "hate" the ex wife, I am living my own life with my sweet husband. She is the one obsessing over our pregnancy. Dried up ho.
gggg

Pico Rivera, CA

#84 Jan 19, 2015
My ex-husband left me and our 3 little babies after cheating constantly and his new wife hates me... why? For raising our 3 daughters pretty much alone very nicely all the while barely receiving anything but an occasional child support taken from him by the DA's office? He has his freedom. I love my daughters but freedom I definitely don't have one bit. Wow! How twisted it is that his new wife would be as hateful to me as she can and she doesnt even know me. Disgusting! Then why do I always have to be the one to turn the other cheek to protect the kids when she talks bad about me behind my back. Ugh. I can identify with most of you here.
frankie

New York, NY

#86 Jan 29, 2015
i love Dr Gboco
tweety538182009

Hollywood, FL

#89 Mar 1, 2015
We began seeing each other while they were still married and living together, but the relationship had ended 5 years earlier. They were basically room mates for financial convenience. There had been no sexual intimacy during the 5 years per her decision, and they had lived apart multiple times. I wasn't the only relationship he had during that time either. We've been together now for 5 1/2 years, living together for 4 of those years. I've never met his children. His visitation occurs at her home. He celebrates the holidays at her home, while I'm left at home waiting for him to return. She has more of a relationship with his family than he does. She speaks to his mother on a daily basis. When something happens in his family, he finds out from her, not his family. They discuss our personal life with her, even though we've asked them not to do that. Anytime something happens, his ex calls him to come to her rescue. He used to go running every time, but now he only does it sometimes. Their friendship I feel is inappropriate. They discuss her relationships, which by the way, her boyfriends have met the kids and stayed overnight in her home. Whenever I say anything about his exes behavior, he defends her. It's really difficult for me to find anything about this woman to like. I feel that she is manipulative, controlling, and goes out of her way to intrude in our life. They aren't together anymore. Get over it and move on.

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