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Serious advice needed

United States

#1 Jan 22, 2013
I just found out that my wife has cheated on me with her cousin. I love my wife with all my heart. This all happened in March and July. We were having problems at the time, but those seem to have been worked out. I had my suspicions when he was staying with us in July, and told her I was slightly jealous of him, but I trusted her. I found out this morning that they've had sex in the bed I built while he was in town and while she was visiting him out of state. Like I said, we were having problems at the time and things seem like they are working great now. But do I confront her with this? He's planning on staying with us when he comes back, as he's moving here and will need a place to stay until he finds his own. He's engaged now (I know this for fact), but there is going to be SERIOUS suspicion on my part every time I leave the house and they are together. I don't want to leave her, but she slept with another man in our bed! Do I discuss it with her? Give myself time to cool off? What?

Level 3

Since: Oct 12

Location hidden

#2 Jan 22, 2013
Its over, once cheating is involved it will never work, trust me, I know.
Guest

United States

#3 Jan 22, 2013
Serious advice needed wrote:
I just found out that my wife has cheated on me with her cousin. I love my wife with all my heart. This all happened in March and July. We were having problems at the time, but those seem to have been worked out. I had my suspicions when he was staying with us in July, and told her I was slightly jealous of him, but I trusted her. I found out this morning that they've had sex in the bed I built while he was in town and while she was visiting him out of state. Like I said, we were having problems at the time and things seem like they are working great now. But do I confront her with this? He's planning on staying with us when he comes back, as he's moving here and will need a place to stay until he finds his own. He's engaged now (I know this for fact), but there is going to be SERIOUS suspicion on my part every time I leave the house and they are together. I don't want to leave her, but she slept with another man in our bed! Do I discuss it with her? Give myself time to cool off? What?
Are you for real? You say " while you had trouble" ; all people have trouble but still suppose to keep those wedding vows.
Are you a man or mouse?

“it is what it is”

Level 5

Since: Jan 13

Location hidden

#4 Jan 22, 2013
Serious advice needed wrote:
I just found out that my wife has cheated on me with her cousin. I love my wife with all my heart. This all happened in March and July. We were having problems at the time, but those seem to have been worked out. I had my suspicions when he was staying with us in July, and told her I was slightly jealous of him, but I trusted her. I found out this morning that they've had sex in the bed I built while he was in town and while she was visiting him out of state. Like I said, we were having problems at the time and things seem like they are working great now. But do I confront her with this? He's planning on staying with us when he comes back, as he's moving here and will need a place to stay until he finds his own. He's engaged now (I know this for fact), but there is going to be SERIOUS suspicion on my part every time I leave the house and they are together. I don't want to leave her, but she slept with another man in our bed! Do I discuss it with her? Give myself time to cool off? What?
Sweetheart You're to nice. I can't believe your even considering letting him stay in your home again. He slept with you're wife!! Maybe you can work it out with you're wife but the heck if i'd let that cousin back in my house ever!!!! Yes you need to confront her with it.
BTDT

Harrison, AR

#5 Jan 22, 2013
Heck yes discuss it with her, then make plans for divorce because it will only get worse. My soon to be ex left her last husband and children for her cousin...not once but twice. They hooked up after her own sister's funeral. Several years later when we married she claimed to be a born again Christian and promised she was no longer the same person since God forgave her of her sins and she repented. I discovered later that she had already been married 3 times previously and did the same thing to all of them. We were barely married a year before she started having an affair with her own stepbrother (and others) but told me she felt no remorse because God told her in the shower her sins were forgiven and she owed me no explanation and called me an agent of Satan for judging her and her actions. She still gets on FB and posts all these Christian statuses because she says it makes her appear more credible as a teacher and besides, "What she does and the reasons she does it is between her and God." So yes, I would suggest you get out now!

“it is what it is”

Level 5

Since: Jan 13

Location hidden

#6 Jan 22, 2013
Btw, who sleeps with their cousins?? Come on!!! that's crazy.
Mad Max

Blytheville, AR

#7 Jan 22, 2013
Serious advice needed wrote:
I just found out that my wife has cheated on me with her cousin. I love my wife with all my heart. This all happened in March and July. We were having problems at the time, but those seem to have been worked out. I had my suspicions when he was staying with us in July, and told her I was slightly jealous of him, but I trusted her. I found out this morning that they've had sex in the bed I built while he was in town and while she was visiting him out of state. Like I said, we were having problems at the time and things seem like they are working great now. But do I confront her with this? He's planning on staying with us when he comes back, as he's moving here and will need a place to stay until he finds his own. He's engaged now (I know this for fact), but there is going to be SERIOUS suspicion on my part every time I leave the house and they are together. I don't want to leave her, but she slept with another man in our bed! Do I discuss it with her? Give myself time to cool off? What?
First time, shame on her. Second time, shame on you. Just saying...
Dramamama

Harrison, AR

#8 Jan 22, 2013
BTDT wrote:
Heck yes discuss it with her, then make plans for divorce because it will only get worse. My soon to be ex left her last husband and children for her cousin...not once but twice. They hooked up after her own sister's funeral. Several years later when we married she claimed to be a born again Christian and promised she was no longer the same person since God forgave her of her sins and she repented. I discovered later that she had already been married 3 times previously and did the same thing to all of them. We were barely married a year before she started having an affair with her own stepbrother (and others) but told me she felt no remorse because God told her in the shower her sins were forgiven and she owed me no explanation and called me an agent of Satan for judging her and her actions. She still gets on FB and posts all these Christian statuses because she says it makes her appear more credible as a teacher and besides, "What she does and the reasons she does it is between her and God." So yes, I would suggest you get out now!
This guy's right. Get out now while you can. You'll never be able to trust her again. Everyone here knows who this teacher is she proves once a cheater always a cheater, no matter what they promise or pretend to be.
Guest

United States

#9 Jan 22, 2013
Dramamama wrote:
<quoted text>
This guy's right. Get out now while you can. You'll never be able to trust her again. Everyone here knows who this teacher is she proves once a cheater always a cheater, no matter what they promise or pretend to be.
I don't who is she?
happyhappyhappy

Jonesboro, AR

#10 Jan 22, 2013
Serious advice needed wrote:
I just found out that my wife has cheated on me with her cousin. I love my wife with all my heart. This all happened in March and July. We were having problems at the time, but those seem to have been worked out. I had my suspicions when he was staying with us in July, and told her I was slightly jealous of him, but I trusted her. I found out this morning that they've had sex in the bed I built while he was in town and while she was visiting him out of state. Like I said, we were having problems at the time and things seem like they are working great now. But do I confront her with this? He's planning on staying with us when he comes back, as he's moving here and will need a place to stay until he finds his own. He's engaged now (I know this for fact), but there is going to be SERIOUS suspicion on my part every time I leave the house and they are together. I don't want to leave her, but she slept with another man in our bed! Do I discuss it with her? Give myself time to cool off? What?
I know you love her, but trust me it will never work out. You will never be able to be comfortable with her again. If you leave her it will hurt but if you stay it will also hurt. You deserve better sweetheart. You shouldn't have to feel uncomfortable in a relationship. You just need a woman who is faithful and loves you. If someone loves you they don't cheat on you. I hope it works out for you. Just please listen to the advice everyone is telling you.
watchout

Paragould, AR

#11 Jan 22, 2013
Option 1
You loved her, but she did not love you enough NOT to suck another man's c**k and her cousins at that! RUN and HIDE from this family of hers. probably all inbreed.

Option 2
Forget the whole thing and kiss those lips of hers that had his c**k in and go back to hearing "Love you too baby"
Bravo

United States

#12 Jan 22, 2013
Dam I want her number. If she will suck her cousin, she will suck any co€k
gypsy rose44

Jonesboro, AR

#13 Jan 22, 2013
Listen I don't want to hurt your feelings or anything but a woman who has a affair on her husband under ANY circumstance is not worth your time or trouble. A woman who sleeps with her own family members is a complete disgusting, vile, inbred low life who cares more about sex and screwing then she does you or herself for that matter! You are doing nothing but wasting your life and you'll look back at some point and wish you had left sooner and had the time you wasted. As far as the cousin goes I would meet him as he stepped out his car and tell him to not bother getting out! Good Luck with it all I know it's painful but the pain will leave and there is someone out there that is waiting and is the person you really need.
BTDT

Harrison, AR

#14 Jan 22, 2013
gypsy rose44 wrote:
Listen I don't want to hurt your feelings or anything but a woman who has a affair on her husband under ANY circumstance is not worth your time or trouble. A woman who sleeps with her own family members is a complete disgusting, vile, inbred low life who cares more about sex and screwing then she does you or herself for that matter! You are doing nothing but wasting your life and you'll look back at some point and wish you had left sooner and had the time you wasted. As far as the cousin goes I would meet him as he stepped out his car and tell him to not bother getting out! Good Luck with it all I know it's painful but the pain will leave and there is someone out there that is waiting and is the person you really need.
AMEN! Very vile and disgusting indeed!
doc

Gregory, AR

#15 Jan 22, 2013
i know you THINK you love her and you want to try and work it out but i can tell you if there is one guy she is sleeping with that you know about how many others are out there that you DO NOT know about and if you get to investigating you might find there is A LOT of things you do not know about.

the best advice is start gathering your evidence and take it to a lawyer especially if you have children together
yuck

Saint Louis, MO

#16 Jan 23, 2013
Her cousin!!!! That alone is insane, nasty and just gross!! Don't consider kicking her to the curb, DO IT!!! If there are kids involved, what are you all gonna do? You gonna let them grow up thinking they can sleep with family members? For you to even consider that crazy stuff, How could you even think of letting him stay with you!!Not trying to be mean, but dang, that's messed up.. If I was you Id move on to someone who is not shacking up with there family.... Have a little respect for yourself...
yuck

Saint Louis, MO

#17 Jan 23, 2013
Guest wrote:
<quoted text> Are you for real? You say " while you had trouble" ; all people have trouble but still suppose to keep those wedding vows.
Are you a man or mouse?
LMAO.. I think them wedding vows were broken when she did the dirty deed with her cousin.
bob

Paragould, AR

#18 Jan 23, 2013
truthisjust wrote:
Btw, who sleeps with their cousins?? Come on!!! that's crazy.
Hey..... This IS Arkansas! I wouldn't dare do either one, but an old friend told me years ago, "you do your cousin so you won't do your sister!" Yuck!
Dramamama

Harrison, AR

#19 Jan 23, 2013
Cheating in and of itself is a vile act; but to cheat with a family member, whether it be a cousin, stepbrother...that's just plain trashy, no matter how they try to rationalize it.

“it is what it is”

Level 5

Since: Jan 13

Location hidden

#20 Jan 23, 2013
People married their cousins a hundred years ago When they had children they were born with deformities and other problems. Not cool. I find it very disturbing. I have fond memories of my cousins growing up and never once felt any sexual attraction. Yuck!!! That's all i'm sayng!

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