Are human being wired to be incompatible with monogamy?

Posted in the Owensboro Forum

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wondering

Princeton, KY

#1 Jan 10, 2013
???
kristi

Duluth, GA

#2 Jan 10, 2013
I dont think so. Some people are trustworthy, some are not.
hmmm

United States

#3 Jan 10, 2013
kristi wrote:
I dont think so. Some people are trustworthy, some are not.
Sometimes I wonder of we are limiting ourselves by spending our lifetime with one person.
THE Husband

United States

#4 Jan 10, 2013
People are wired for monogamy, but we are still human and humans make mistakes and poor decisions.... sometimes pretty bad and costly mistakes. Today's technology makes it so much easier to make theses mistakes.
kristi

Duluth, GA

#5 Jan 10, 2013
hmmm wrote:
<quoted text>
Sometimes I wonder of we are limiting ourselves by spending our lifetime with one person.
i suppose everyone is different. My husband and i spend all our time together, even work. We wouldnt have it any other way. We are best friends too. But someone else would be bored with that.
THE Husband

United States

#6 Jan 10, 2013
kristi wrote:
<quoted text>i suppose everyone is different. My husband and i spend all our time together, even work. We wouldnt have it any other way. We are best friends too. But someone else would be bored with that.
My wife and I used to be in the same situation. I would give anything to go back to that life. I was blessed being able to spend every day with my best friend and the love of my life....sighh
Friendly

Owensboro, KY

#7 Jan 10, 2013
Everyone is the same. We are all the same species and it is not in our nature to be monogamous. That's why people have to work at it, bc it is unnatural. Has nothing to do with being trustworthy or having a preference, instead it is human nature. This is science. Research this from a scientifical standpoint and you will understand better.

Ps we are limiting ourselves greatly
THE Husband

United States

#8 Jan 10, 2013
We are the same species but we are all not anywhere close to being the same. There is a gross difference between a Charles Manson and The Pope..As a species we all have the same basic needs for survival, but we all do not share the need to step out on a relationships.Those who do make a choice to do so. Doesn't mean they are bad, just human. There are good people there are bad ones.
THE Husband

United States

#9 Jan 10, 2013
Nature vs. Nurture
kristi

Duluth, GA

#10 Jan 10, 2013
Maybe it depends on ur choice of spouse....if i had a different husband that maybe wasnt as kind, or interesting etc, maybe i would be tempted just out of boredom.
crzzzd

Rochester, PA

#11 Jan 10, 2013
youtube.com/watch...
Win some,Lose some

Since: Nov 12

Location hidden

#12 Jan 10, 2013
kristi wrote:
<quoted text>i suppose everyone is different. My husband and i spend all our time together, even work. We wouldnt have it any other way. We are best friends too. But someone else would be bored with that.
My wife and I are the same way. I used to drive a truck long distance, and we hated being away from home, so I took a local job. It's hard getting used to not having her with me all the time. I love every minute I spend with her. She is my soulmate and best friend.
THE Husband

United States

#13 Jan 10, 2013
kristi wrote:
Maybe it depends on ur choice of spouse....if i had a different husband that maybe wasnt as kind, or interesting etc, maybe i would be tempted just out of boredom.
Good point, well made. Everyone will be tempted at some point. Everyone will make their decision based on many different reasons. Some will make the right one, some will not.

Since: Nov 12

Location hidden

#14 Jan 10, 2013
It's easier in life to be dishonest, lie, steal etc., but there is nothing that works better for the soul than honest, hard work and telling the truth, even when a lie can get you out of a pickle. Choosing to be honest, and live an honorable life of integrity and truth is very hard, even for the best of people. It's easier to steal an ounce of gold and sell it than work for the equivalent amount honestly, right?

Relationships are no different. It's about truth and honesty, not only to your partner, but to yourself. When things just aren't right, then the relationship should end, but cheating and dishonesty is not the way to do it. Anything, no matter how painful, or upsetting can be handle in an honest manner - but taking that road is the hardest part.
THE Husband

Duluth, GA

#15 Jan 10, 2013
Lolum4dbr0 wrote:
It's easier in life to be dishonest, lie, steal etc., but there is nothing that works better for the soul than honest, hard work and telling the truth, even when a lie can get you out of a pickle. Choosing to be honest, and live an honorable life of integrity and truth is very hard, even for the best of people. It's easier to steal an ounce of gold and sell it than work for the equivalent amount honestly, right?

Relationships are no different. It's about truth and honesty, not only to your partner, but to yourself. When things just aren't right, then the relationship should end, but cheating and dishonesty is not the way to do it. Anything, no matter how painful, or upsetting can be handle in an honest manner - but taking that road is the hardest part.
Well said

Level 2

Since: Nov 12

Location hidden

#16 Jan 10, 2013
No, we are animals..mammals, but evolution is still in control. It has nothing to do with being trustworthy. we are trying to deny nature and that is very difficult. It is totally natural to want to pursue others, we are just fooling ourselves if we believe otherwise.

Since: Nov 12

Location hidden

#17 Jan 10, 2013
KySchadenfreude wrote:
No, we are animals..mammals, but evolution is still in control. It has nothing to do with being trustworthy. we are trying to deny nature and that is very difficult. It is totally natural to want to pursue others, we are just fooling ourselves if we believe otherwise.
I believe in God, and that my marriage is sacred. We may SCIENTIFICALLY be "animals", and it is natural to look and think "damn she's fine" etc, but I am not filling myself. I'm sorry you haven't found someone that makes you feel the way I feel about my wife. It's kind of like explaining to an atheist how a true faith in God makes you feel.

Since: Nov 12

Location hidden

#18 Jan 10, 2013
Lol fooling, not filling
sorry

United States

#19 Jan 10, 2013
Lolum4dbr0 wrote:
<quoted text>I believe in God, and that my marriage is sacred. We may SCIENTIFICALLY be "animals", and it is natural to look and think "damn she's fine" etc, but I am not filling myself. I'm sorry you haven't found someone that makes you feel the way I feel about my wife. It's kind of like explaining to an atheist how a true faith in God makes you feel.
I believe in God, but marriage was started to establish women as property. Now marriage is scared because no woman would put up with being property and churches make money off of its sacredness.

Since: Nov 12

Location hidden

#20 Jan 10, 2013
sorry wrote:
<quoted text>I believe in God, but marriage was started to establish women as property. Now marriage is scared because no woman would put up with being property and churches make money off of its sacredness.
College is a business, mostly concerned with profit and revenues, but does that negate its importance? My marriage is a vow between myself, my wife and God. This was not a conversation on the origins of marriage or our beliefs in their creation, it was about infidelity and honesty. I was only saying that just because we are "animals" doesn't make it ok to be a slut after taking a vow to remain monogamous to your partner. Even so, if you aren't going to be monogamous, make it known, let her or him find someone that will be if that's what they need. Don't be a coward and run the streets lying, creeping etc. be honest, it's the harder and better way to live. Makes it easier to sleep at noght

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