need some honest advice

need some honest advice

Posted in the Owensboro Forum

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Since: Apr 13

United States

#1 Apr 14, 2013
I am expecting a child and my baby's father and I are no longer together. He is still involved, but I am in a relationship with someone else now. We are trying to decide whether to use his last name or mine. Since we are not together I would rather use mine, but people have told me that it's not right to take that away from the baby's father. Sooo what is everyone else's take on the situation?
Sir Licksalot

Cadiz, KY

#2 Apr 14, 2013
You need a name like Sharpton, you need a nmae like Jackson, you need a name like King, you need a name like Marshall, you need a government program...
Elizabeth

Indianapolis, IN

#3 Apr 14, 2013
You should acknowledge the fact that the father helped you create something amazing. Whether you like him or not.
I Think

Owensboro, KY

#4 Apr 14, 2013
I believe you should give the baby your own last name. I also believe you should keep your own last name until the last child is 18 yrs old. This will make your life much easier since you won't have to explain it, ever.
Guy

United States

#5 Apr 14, 2013
Give him/her the dads last name more then Likely you will end up married and have a diff last name anyway. So why not?
Don

United States

#6 Apr 14, 2013
I think " You Hun are a complete heartless bitch it sounds like . Sorry to be to blunt but it's true . It's the fathers child also , you bitches don't create kids alone . Are you gonna want support ? Sure you will so whats the deal with not recognizing the father ? He did help make that child !
BBN

Hopkinsville, KY

#7 Apr 14, 2013
Indecisive Mom wrote:
I am expecting a child and my baby's father and I are no longer together. He is still involved, but I am in a relationship with someone else now. We are trying to decide whether to use his last name or mine. Since we are not together I would rather use mine, but people have told me that it's not right to take that away from the baby's father. Sooo what is everyone else's take on the situation?
the right thing to do is to follow tradition. The fathers last name is the proper thing to do. Make your last name the middle name. Especially if it's a baby boy. You eventually may marry the new man your with. So you will drop your last name anyways. And if the father is involved has last name is all that makes since. I'm not sure of the whole situation of why your not with the baby's father and not my place to give opinion on that. Follow tradition. At least give him that.
Please

Owensboro, KY

#8 Apr 14, 2013
Don wrote:
I think " You Hun are a complete heartless bitch it sounds like . Sorry to be to blunt but it's true . It's the fathers child also , you bitches don't create kids alone . Are you gonna want support ? Sure you will so whats the deal with not recognizing the father ? He did help make that child !
50% of the time the father's don't stick around anyway. It's half her child as well so why does it make her heartless? She has a valid concern and I'm sure she's just worried about what will be easier on the child. OP can you give the baby BOTH last names?
Please

Owensboro, KY

#9 Apr 14, 2013
Btw I gave my first child his father's last name against my parent's pleas and wishes. A few days after his first birthday daddy found a new girlfriend and seemed to forget his son's name all together.
lol

Dunmor, KY

#10 Apr 14, 2013
Indecisive Mom wrote:
I am expecting a child and my baby's father and I are no longer together. He is still involved, but I am in a relationship with someone else now. We are trying to decide whether to use his last name or mine. Since we are not together I would rather use mine, but people have told me that it's not right to take that away from the baby's father. Sooo what is everyone else's take on the situation?
You should use the child's fathers name.
grace

Indianapolis, IN

#11 Apr 14, 2013
Agree with Elizabeth

Since: Apr 13

Utica, KY

#12 Apr 14, 2013
Well I don't dislike the father. We were just discussing it. I am not heartless or else I wouldn't give him a say so. He did help me make the child, but he isn't the one carrying it or giving birth. I don't need financial support or a "government program". I have a job & I am in school. I've got it all under control.
Both of our last names suck anyways...but thanks for the help (well to some of you who weren't assholes about it).
BBN

Hopkinsville, KY

#13 Apr 14, 2013
Your welcome. You can flip a coin.lol best thing to do us love your child. I was given my moms maiden name to began my life. My fathers last name at 5 had that last name for one year. Then my mon changed it back to her maiden name after they divorced then at 13 my step dad gave me his. My last name doesnt mean much. Make a solid decision for your child and the favor you can do for you child is live with it. There's not a right or wrong answer
lol

Dunmor, KY

#14 Apr 14, 2013
BBN wrote:
Your welcome. You can flip a coin.lol best thing to do us love your child. I was given my moms maiden name to began my life. My fathers last name at 5 had that last name for one year. Then my mon changed it back to her maiden name after they divorced then at 13 my step dad gave me his. My last name doesnt mean much. Make a solid decision for your child and the favor you can do for you child is live with it. There's not a right or wrong answer
With all of those name changes you had, it's no wonder a last name doesn't matter to you. The name can be whatever but it doesn't change the fact that you will always be your fathers child.
BBN

Hopkinsville, KY

#15 Apr 14, 2013
lol wrote:
<quoted text>
With all of those name changes you had, it's no wonder a last name doesn't matter to you. The name can be whatever but it doesn't change the fact that you will always be your fathers child.
he donated the sperm.lol I've seen him 5 times the last two were my attempts as an adult. I can guarantee you one thing I would not carry his name. My moms name is the only one on my birth certificate. What's messed up is her married name is on the birth certificate and I had her maiden name.
just a suggestion

Owensboro, KY

#16 Apr 14, 2013
Hyphenate the last name. Yours-his!
Like my last name is Stewart and my boyfriends is Johnson. So my baby would be Jayce Stewart-Johnson or Johnson-Stewart. It's a win win!
Emerald

United States

#17 Apr 15, 2013
Don wrote:
I think " You Hun are a complete heartless bitch it sounds like . Sorry to be to blunt but it's true . It's the fathers child also , you bitches don't create kids alone . Are you gonna want support ? Sure you will so whats the deal with not recognizing the father ? He did help make that child !
& what exactly does it take to make a baby? Sex, which is all men care about anyway. So compared to carrying a baby for nine months, giving birth, & dealing with the after-effects of what pregnancy does to a woman's body, that's NOTHING. So if you wanna get sexist up in here, we can do it! She's not a heartless bytch & that's a STUPID thing to say about someone who is merely trying to figure out what's best for her unborn child. Legally she doesn't have to give him ANY rights so he should be grateful for what she's nice enough to give him.
lol

Nebo, KY

#18 Apr 15, 2013
Emerald wrote:
<quoted text>& what exactly does it take to make a baby? Sex, which is all men care about anyway. So compared to carrying a baby for nine months, giving birth, & dealing with the after-effects of what pregnancy does to a woman's body, that's NOTHING. So if you wanna get sexist up in here, we can do it! She's not a heartless bytch & that's a STUPID thing to say about someone who is merely trying to figure out what's best for her unborn child. Legally she doesn't have to give him ANY rights so he should be grateful for what she's nice enough to give him.
Wrong! Legally he has a ton of rights. He just doesn't have control over whether or not she gives her child his name.
Wrong

United States

#19 Apr 15, 2013
Sorry to break the news to ya but the above poster is off key and totally WRONG !
Emerald

United States

#20 Apr 15, 2013
Wrong wrote:
Sorry to break the news to ya but the above poster is off key and totally WRONG !
What I meant was, he would have to go through some processing to have his rights IF she denied him. Which 50% of the time, men ain't that worried and don't wanna go through all the drama. SHE has control over if his name goes on the birth certificate because the hospital automatically DOES NOT put his name on it if they're not married. So in that case, he would have to push for it & have a DNA test done & idk what else. So he has rights, he just has to fight for them.

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