Resigned

Owensboro, KY

#1 Mar 23, 2013
I need serious advice. I watch my step daughter being emotionally abused by her mother, but it's never enough for the court to change custody. It's been 8 years & my husband's ex is just completely psychotic. She refuses to communicate at all with him, and tells their daughter horrific lies that she even knows aren't true. My husband is 100% involved in his daugter's life (as much as he can be, given the standard visitation) as far as school, sports, etc. His ex is constantly pulling a new stunt that is not good for their daughter--moving constantly, changing schools, sending her over here in clothes too small or torn & unclean, constantly leaving her with babysitters. He has been to court so many times but nothing changes. Is there a point where he just stops fighting & just goes along with whatever his ex does & just does his best to be there for his girl until she's old enough to choose to move in with him? He feels like he's giving up on her but there really isn't anything he can do to change things. I don't know what to tell him anymore. Any advice is welcome.
husband

Kuttawa, KY

#2 Mar 23, 2013
Not a lot you can do ... Just support your husband
lol

Princeton, KY

#3 Mar 23, 2013
Resigned wrote:
I need serious advice. I watch my step daughter being emotionally abused by her mother, but it's never enough for the court to change custody. It's been 8 years & my husband's ex is just completely psychotic. She refuses to communicate at all with him, and tells their daughter horrific lies that she even knows aren't true. My husband is 100% involved in his daugter's life (as much as he can be, given the standard visitation) as far as school, sports, etc. His ex is constantly pulling a new stunt that is not good for their daughter--moving constantly, changing schools, sending her over here in clothes too small or torn & unclean, constantly leaving her with babysitters. He has been to court so many times but nothing changes. Is there a point where he just stops fighting & just goes along with whatever his ex does & just does his best to be there for his girl until she's old enough to choose to move in with him? He feels like he's giving up on her but there really isn't anything he can do to change things. I don't know what to tell him anymore. Any advice is welcome.
He should never give up on what is in the best interest of his daughter. Keep a log of the things she does and take her back to court. Fight for custody.

Level 2

Since: Jul 12

Dover, TN

#4 Mar 24, 2013
Resigned wrote:
I need serious advice. I watch my step daughter being emotionally abused by her mother, but it's never enough for the court to change custody. It's been 8 years & my husband's ex is just completely psychotic. She refuses to communicate at all with him, and tells their daughter horrific lies that she even knows aren't true. My husband is 100% involved in his daugter's life (as much as he can be, given the standard visitation) as far as school, sports, etc. His ex is constantly pulling a new stunt that is not good for their daughter--moving constantly, changing schools, sending her over here in clothes too small or torn & unclean, constantly leaving her with babysitters. He has been to court so many times but nothing changes. Is there a point where he just stops fighting & just goes along with whatever his ex does & just does his best to be there for his girl until she's old enough to choose to move in with him? He feels like he's giving up on her but there really isn't anything he can do to change things. I don't know what to tell him anymore. Any advice is welcome.
I agree with lol. You need proof. Pictures, documents from school, etc. obviously you can't stop the mom from bashing the father but if there are true physical and emotional signs you need to document them one way or another so the judge can really see it.
Resigned

Owensboro, KY

#5 Mar 24, 2013
The judge has seen it. Mother was charged with emotional abuse, made to do some counseling for awhile, then social services just closed the case because she threatened their daughter enough to keep her mouth closed, and of course put on her mommy of the year act for the court & social worker til it was all done & she was in the clear. That's what I was referring to when I said the court is no help. After that, although we do still keep record of everything, it just feels like nothing will ever change. It's a horrible feeling. I will continue to support my husband, though, no matter what happens. And I pray for him & my step daughter & her mom, that she either changes her ways or finally gets caught up one day.

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