Wife's weight is a turnoff for husband

Wife's weight is a turnoff for husband

There are 338 comments on the Chicago Tribune story from Oct 29, 2007, titled Wife's weight is a turnoff for husband. In it, Chicago Tribune reports that:

Dear Amy: My wife and I just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. We are still in love, and I could not live without her.

Join the discussion below, or Read more at Chicago Tribune.

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“Common sense isn't so common”

Since: Jun 07

seattle,wa

#355 Nov 19, 2008
asd wrote:
<quoted text>
You would be INSANE to consider WLS for such a small amt of weight. I know the big brother doctors are pushing this for as little as people who have 20 lbs to lose but you need to see it as what it is..a potential life ending operation. Yes people often die during and after WLS.. its very common. If you are happy and your husband is happy.. worry less and live more
Did you even read what I was replying to? she wasn't 20 pounds over, she said she was 5'2 215 pounds. READ BEFORE YOU TYPE

“Common sense isn't so common”

Since: Jun 07

seattle,wa

#356 Nov 19, 2008
Alpha Omega Game wrote:
<quoted text>
So far so good I can't complain. Going to buy a house? That's great news congrats. What a sweet way to start off the new year.:)
Are you looking for a single story or a two story home?
Can't believe it's been almost a year, 7 days after I answered your post we got into a pretty serious car accident. Both legs and my pelvic bone were broken along with my right arm. Got to spend a month in the hospital *yay*
so, when or if you get this hope things are going well, t/c

“Leave the gun; take the canoli”

Since: Oct 07

Erie, PA

#358 Dec 17, 2008
the bigger picture wrote:
<quoted text>
Theres no such thing as not being able to afford YMCA, if your low income they have a sliding fee scale. Walking is free. As for injuries I just got done rehab from a car wreak, both legs were broke as was my pelvic. my back is shot, BUT I'm not going to give up and become one of the whiny complaining women who use that as an excuse, I have a peronal trainer so that I can get my strenghth back. I do understand thyroid issues but if you can't afford them, thats what the drug companies have the programs for, so if you can't afford a prescription you can get through one of the programs for free. I agree with alpha, you're an enabler too
Your straw man argument and ad hominem attack is flawed for obvious reasons. You missed my point entirely. And your facts are wrong about affording a YMCA membership - even on a sliding fee scale. Where I live, the lowest fee for a YMCA membership is $30/mo. Now,$30/mo may not be missed by you. But for someone else who might be struggling to get by on $600/mo SSI,$30 could mean not paying the rent or utilities. For those who are extremely low income, including those who are unemployed,$30/mo IS unaffordable. Second, one of the other women who regularly swims when I go to our local YMCA is twice my size. Swimming burns alot more calories and tones more muscles simultaneously than walking. Yet, this other woman has not been able to get any slimmer. Like me, she is also open water rescue certified. Yet all the exercise in the world has not given her a thin young Barbie body, OK. As to your own determination to keep your current slim figure despite your injuries, talk to me in about 10-15 years. See if you look the same. And if you do, great. But you missed my point entirely: everyone is unique. Just because someone else's looks/body type is different, that is not a valid reason to deny them employment and publicly humiliate them.

Jacqueline S. Homan,
Author: "Nothing You Can Possess"
"Eyes of a Monster"
"Classism For Dimwits"

“Common sense isn't so common”

Since: Jun 07

seattle,wa

#359 Jan 21, 2009
Jacqueline Homan wrote:
<quoted text>
Your straw man argument and ad hominem attack is flawed for obvious reasons. You missed my point entirely. And your facts are wrong about affording a YMCA membership - even on a sliding fee scale. Where I live, the lowest fee for a YMCA membership is $30/mo. Now,$30/mo may not be missed by you. But for someone else who might be struggling to get by on $600/mo SSI,$30 could mean not paying the rent or utilities. For those who are extremely low income, including those who are unemployed,$30/mo IS unaffordable. Second, one of the other women who regularly swims when I go to our local YMCA is twice my size. Swimming burns alot more calories and tones more muscles simultaneously than walking. Yet, this other woman has not been able to get any slimmer. Like me, she is also open water rescue certified. Yet all the exercise in the world has not given her a thin young Barbie body, OK. As to your own determination to keep your current slim figure despite your injuries, talk to me in about 10-15 years. See if you look the same. And if you do, great. But you missed my point entirely: everyone is unique. Just because someone else's looks/body type is different, that is not a valid reason to deny them employment and publicly humiliate them.
Jacqueline S. Homan,
Author: "Nothing You Can Possess"
"Eyes of a Monster"
"Classism For Dimwits"
I'll be 40 in 6 months, I'm the same weight I was in high school. Do I have the same body as back then? No, I've had kids and age changes your body. But I accept that. Also YMCA's do have forms that you can ask for, that if you fall under the poverty line you can get in there for if I remember correctly it was 5-7 a month, the form needs to be filled out by a dr, and don't tell me that theres no such form because I'm consantly helping people get those forms and making sure they get filled out correctly.

“Leave the gun; take the canoli”

Since: Oct 07

Erie, PA

#360 Jan 22, 2009
the bigger picture wrote:
<quoted text>
I'll be 40 in 6 months, I'm the same weight I was in high school. Do I have the same body as back then? No, I've had kids and age changes your body. But I accept that. Also YMCA's do have forms that you can ask for, that if you fall under the poverty line you can get in there for if I remember correctly it was 5-7 a month, the form needs to be filled out by a dr, and don't tell me that theres no such form because I'm consantly helping people get those forms and making sure they get filled out correctly.
If that's how they do it in Washington state, great. But that's not how the YMCA's operate here in Erie, PA. And just becuase you are one of the lucky few who managed to retain the same size you were when you were a high school teenager, that does not mean that is the norm for most women - including those who are active and who do watch every little crumb and count every calorie that they eat. You're the exception, not the rule. So that makes you lucky - not better than everyone else, so you can just get off your high horse.

Jacqueline S. Homan,
Author: "Nothing You Can Possess"
"Eyes of a Monster"
"Classism For Dimwits"
http://jacquelinehoman7.googlepages.com/nothi...

“Common sense isn't so common”

Since: Jun 07

seattle,wa

#361 Jan 23, 2009
Jacqueline Homan wrote:
<quoted text>
If that's how they do it in Washington state, great. But that's not how the YMCA's operate here in Erie, PA. And just becuase you are one of the lucky few who managed to retain the same size you were when you were a high school teenager, that does not mean that is the norm for most women - including those who are active and who do watch every little crumb and count every calorie that they eat. You're the exception, not the rule. So that makes you lucky - not better than everyone else, so you can just get off your high horse.
Jacqueline S. Homan,
Author: "Nothing You Can Possess"
"Eyes of a Monster"
"Classism For Dimwits"
http://jacquelinehoman7.googlepages.com/nothi...
OMG, get off my high horse? Sorry if being proud of ones self is a bad thing in your eyes. By no means am I the "exception" when I see most of the women in the area I live in and they're the same way, and some of them are older then I am. As for luck, I guess maybe I am, but you are the first person to ever say I think I'm better then everyone else... I'm not the one who has to put book's you've wrote at the end of EVERY post..lawl yea pot calling the kettel black and don't bother replying, I'm not going to bother reading anything more you post.If you would have read any of my earlier post's you would have seen I'm not someone who judges anyone,unlike you.
Grandma Fudd

Oviedo, FL

#362 Jan 23, 2009
At a certain age, mentally healthy individuals learn to become "comfortable with their body". This doesn't mean that you 'abandon yourself to indulgence' but rather accept the fact that age and gravity are facts of life and you will never have the body of an 18 year old 'hottie' or 'hunk' and you might as well accept it and go on. As for the man complaining about his wife's weight, I bet he is one of these guys with a 38 inch waist and a 52 inch 'lop over'. that I see daily trying to pretend they can still get into the pants size they wore in college. There is nothing so hilarious as seeing a wrinkled weathered skin face and freshly dyed dark hair either. It looks like they stuck their heads in a black ink barrel. Hint to these idiots: You look ridiculous. Look and act your age. Nobody is being fooled one bit. You are not only not looking younger, but now you are looking dumber.
Lisa

Chula Vista, CA

#363 Jun 17, 2009
cjaneh wrote:
I am somewhat confused...men are always blogging or posting comments about "mt fat wife this...or my fat girlfriend that....I am so turned off". But I rarely see a post or comment from a woman complaining about her fat **** husband or bf. Why is that?? Don't tell me there are no fat men out there cause there are plenty. Anyone want to comment?
Hi,
Well i'm on here, because my husband watches porn because he said he found my body disgusting. I'm 5 feet and 140 lbs, but i've had a kid and I do work out. My husband isn't really on the skinny side but he does try to stay in shape, but he was super skinny when I first met him and I think it's different when a woman loves a man because we love with all of our heart. My husband could gain a 100lbs and I'd still love him just as much. I think all men are assholes, and I hope my heart heals soon so I can be happy again.
Livermore Mom

Pleasanton, CA

#364 Jun 17, 2009
hmmm, let's see.

Since marrying my husband 15 years ago, he has LOST around 35 pounds...I don't find him as attractive as I did when we married, but I love him just the same.

Why should it be different for a man when his wife gains weight?

The vows say "For richer or poorer. In sickness and in health. For as long as you both shall live"
Did i miss a part that said I will only love and stay with you if you stay as you are now?

In 50 years it won't matter, we won't be having sex anyway!

Since: Dec 07

Stockton, CA

#365 Jul 28, 2009
the bigger picture wrote:
<quoted text>
good, been busy with work and the family and now looking for a house to buy :) so yea new year has been great so far
how's yours been?
Hey you :)

Sorry I missed your posts. 2008 was a bummer for me and 2009 hasn't been much better. Glad yours started off nicely.

Since: Dec 07

Stockton, CA

#366 Jul 28, 2009
the bigger picture wrote:
<quoted text>
Theres no such thing as not being able to afford YMCA, if your low income they have a sliding fee scale. Walking is free. As for injuries I just got done rehab from a car wreak, both legs were broke as was my pelvic. my back is shot, BUT I'm not going to give up and become one of the whiny complaining women who use that as an excuse, I have a peronal trainer so that I can get my strenghth back. I do understand thyroid issues but if you can't afford them, thats what the drug companies have the programs for, so if you can't afford a prescription you can get through one of the programs for free. I agree with alpha, you're an enabler too
Yeah she is an enabler and her whiny verbose posts only makes her look ignorant to the options avaiable to overweight people with or without tyroid.

Since: Dec 07

Stockton, CA

#367 Jul 28, 2009
the bigger picture wrote:
<quoted text>
OMG, get off my high horse? Sorry if being proud of ones self is a bad thing in your eyes. By no means am I the "exception" when I see most of the women in the area I live in and they're the same way, and some of them are older then I am. As for luck, I guess maybe I am, but you are the first person to ever say I think I'm better then everyone else... I'm not the one who has to put book's you've wrote at the end of EVERY post..lawl yea pot calling the kettel black and don't bother replying, I'm not going to bother reading anything more you post.If you would have read any of my earlier post's you would have seen I'm not someone who judges anyone,unlike you.
Yeah she is hypocrite for sure. It's ok for her to be on a high horse or accuse others of being on one but don't you dare do what she does or she'll write a bitchy long winded post your way. You see ,Jack thinks he's perfect and does no wrong and he thinks he can sit on his ass and boss people around or belittle them if they don't think or act according to her standards because she is involved with charities and writes books that don't sell. She is easily one of the WORST people I've ever met on Topix. Jack has delusions of grandeur and the arrogant attitude that goes along with it.

Since: Dec 07

Stockton, CA

#368 Jul 28, 2009
the bigger picture wrote:
<quoted text>
Can't believe it's been almost a year, 7 days after I answered your post we got into a pretty serious car accident. Both legs and my pelvic bone were broken along with my right arm. Got to spend a month in the hospital *yay*
so, when or if you get this hope things are going well, t/c
I'm soo sorry to hear that.:( I hope you're alright.I lost track of this thread and I just found it this morning ( over a year later). Maybe I'll see you around again.You and your family take care,friend. And,congrats on the new home.:)

Things in my life never go well. If I had any optimism left I'd believe it when I say maybe things will change for the the better.

“Common sense isn't so common”

Since: Jun 07

seattle,wa

#369 Nov 19, 2009
Alpha Omega Game wrote:
<quoted text>
I'm soo sorry to hear that.:( I hope you're alright.I lost track of this thread and I just found it this morning ( over a year later). Maybe I'll see you around again.You and your family take care,friend. And,congrats on the new home.:)
Things in my life never go well. If I had any optimism left I'd believe it when I say maybe things will change for the the better.
hey you!! yea the end of 2008 was not a good one for me, my hubby passed away very suddendly, and all of 2009 has pretty much sucked im slowly getting back to where i was emotionlly and mentally. i'm pretty much back physically thankfully
Made to Crave

Spring, TX

#373 Jul 2, 2013
If you care about your spouse, you will encourage them to exercise and eat healthy. If you don't care, you will let them eat themself blind, end up with diabetes, metabolic syndrome, heart attack, stroke, high cholesterol, etc.
Go organic. Eat fresh food. Ditch the fast food and unhealthy choices.
shoprat

Akron, OH

#375 Jul 8, 2013
As we get older our metabolism slows, so unless one plans to not eat, and live at the gym, weight gain is a fact of life. A few extra lbs on a gal can be really sexy, and as long as she keeps herself clean, so what about the weight. Good grief.
Crystal Blue Persuasion

Spring, TX

#376 Aug 12, 2013
I only drank 100 calories today until 5 p.m., then a vegetarian meal. I don't plan to put on weight. In Japan, a wife who lets herself go is considered a disgrace. I'm reading "How to Be An American Housewife" and learning a few things.

Extra lbs typically means blood pressure medication, insulin/oral meds for blood sugar, and statins. No, thank you.
Six Figures

Spring, TX

#377 Aug 18, 2013
shoprat wrote:
As we get older our metabolism slows, so unless one plans to not eat, and live at the gym, weight gain is a fact of life. A few extra lbs on a gal can be really sexy, and as long as she keeps herself clean, so what about the weight. Good grief.
Well, if people were honest, weight can be a turn off. We were out having drinks and fajitas. I saw a waiter who had the exact build of a college boyfriend and it was off to fantasy island for a minute. I wouldn't actually do anything, but if you're not dead, you have those "I remember when" moments.
At that time, I spent two hours working out daily and had a size 5-7 body. I didn't do it for him. I did it for me. I ate whatever I wanted and still lost weight. These days, I don't want to eat whatever I want and work it off. I usually order what I want and take half of home for the next day. We all have to be willing to change if we want to stay healthy and active. I have just as much fun eating out and having a chicken caesar salad with water/lemon or unsweet tea as I do having a margarita and fajitas or steak and lobster.

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