With your ground rules, the only safe course for a male is to never have sex outside marriage, and maybe not even then.Stopping rape is a men's problem
Women have talked among themselves and with their daughters about preventing rape for a very, very long time. They've gone to self-defense classes, held seminars and published safety tips on how to avoid rape. But self-defense and safety tips cannot alone protect women. Because rape is the inevitable outcome in a society that objectifies and dehumanizes women in a plethora of ways.
Men should join women in becoming vocal about the reasons for rape and what can be done to prevent it.
To start with, men should stop contributing, as so many do now, to an atmosphere that condones rape through silent complicity with, or voiced approval, of rape jokes, various forms of victim-blaming and attitudes that treat women as objects to be had if the opportunity presents itself. Men should speak unhesitatingly in the company of other men to break this cycle.
That means fathers speaking to sons as well. Straightforwardly making their sons clear about what truly constitutes consent requires being clear in their own heads what it means. Consent is not given because a woman has previously given consent, or because her outfit seems to be giving consent. And she obviously is not consenting if she is too inebriated or drugged to stay conscious. A campaign in Vancouver, British Columbia, included a wall poster depicting a woman sprawled on a couch next to some empty wine bottles stated: "Just because she isn’t saying no doesn’t mean she is saying yes.”
Fathers should set an example so that their sons also will not remain silent when such behavior arises among their friends or acquaintances, whether at school or some party where the liquor flows. They should impress upon them that there are no "provocations" or circumstances—none—in which rape can be excused. They should repeat these values until they feel as certain as possible that their sons will not be one of those someday accused of rape or having stood by, much less cheered, while their friends or acquaintances raped.
Perhaps carry a blank written contract, to be signed by the woman attesting that she is sober and consents' to be witnessed by three other sober women.
By the way, what about women "raping" men who have had too much to drink?