Fat chance that her guy will ever be ...

Fat chance that her guy will ever be happy

There are 348 comments on the Chicago Tribune story from Mar 27, 2009, titled Fat chance that her guy will ever be happy. In it, Chicago Tribune reports that:

Dear Amy: My boyfriend of seven years just informed me that if I were skinnier we would be married.

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Walking is good for you

AOL

#1 Mar 27, 2009
The person who is so focused on getting a close parking space that they would actually stand in it to save it for a car, is going to die young from stress anyway...so go ahead at run 'em over.
BTW..I lost 20 lbs one year just by choosing a distant parking space and I am shopping while others are still driving around looking for a close space.
pugglemom

Scottsdale, AZ

#2 Mar 27, 2009
I'd love to see Just Fluffy call this guy's bluff. Any bets he'd point to another fault (hers, of course) as the obstacle to marriage? How about this: Just Fluffy loses the weight, then tells the guy she's now too good for him!
sue

United States

#3 Mar 27, 2009
I remember standing in a parking space -- holding it -- telling other would be parkers to move on while I waited for my hubby to bring the car around. I got in the face of a dude that wanted to park in the space - I wouldn't give it up. He wanted to call the cops but my hubby drove up in time and parked in my saved spot. Then we went to the show (this was in Lincoln Park btw). You do have to be careful about doing something like this - tires can get slashed. I wanted to save the close parking spot because the hubby has Ankylosing Spondylitis and walking long distances is difficult for him sometimes. Technically, saving a spot like that is not kosher (especially during a major show) but there it is. I did it and I do not apologize.
Cass

Upland, CA

#4 Mar 28, 2009
Is there somewhere a single database of letters to advice columnists? Last week or a couple of weeks ago, Miss Manners had a letter about a rude wedding gift (a book on marital infidelity), and this week Dear Prudie has the exact same letter, to a word! The answer was also pretty much the same. This past Wednesday, a guy wrote to Amy Alkon about his wife getting fat and not being attracted to her, and now a similar letter is in Amy Dickinson. Different answers this time. As for LW2 in Amy D. today, the exact same letter appeared in Carolyn Hax a few days ago, although Amy's version is somewhat edited. What is going on?

Oh, yes, I know I read too many advice columns. ;-) It's an addiction. Is there a rehab for that somewhere?
jim

Ponte Vedra Beach, FL

#5 Mar 28, 2009
You are not too fat to have sex with,but aer too fat to marry? Tell that bum to hit the road.
too old

Springfield, IL

#6 Mar 28, 2009
jim wrote:
You are not too fat to have sex with,but aer too fat to marry? Tell that bum to hit the road.
Agreed!!
Ivory Dove

San Antonio, TX

#7 Mar 28, 2009
Let's just say it's unrealistic for LW1 to expect her boyfiend to
surprise her by playing Billy Joel's "Just the Way You Are"
at a candle light dinner on her next birthday....

LW2 will probably make the old love uncomfortable if he
reapproaches her after all this time, And who could blame her
husband if he tells LW2 to go away and leave them both alone?
non smoker

Melrose Park, IL

#8 Mar 28, 2009
sue wrote:
I remember standing in a parking space -- holding it -- telling other would be parkers to move on while I waited for my hubby to bring the car around. I got in the face of a dude that wanted to park in the space - I wouldn't give it up. He wanted to call the cops but my hubby drove up in time and parked in my saved spot. Then we went to the show (this was in Lincoln Park btw). You do have to be careful about doing something like this - tires can get slashed. I wanted to save the close parking spot because the hubby has Ankylosing Spondylitis and walking long distances is difficult for him sometimes. Technically, saving a spot like that is not kosher (especially during a major show) but there it is. I did it and I do not apologize.
Then you should drop off the person that has a hard time walking, or get a handicap license plate.
Kimiko

Lake Monroe, FL

#9 Mar 28, 2009
Cass wrote:
Is there somewhere a single database of letters to advice columnists? Last week or a couple of weeks ago, Miss Manners had a letter about a rude wedding gift (a book on marital infidelity), and this week Dear Prudie has the exact same letter, to a word! This past Wednesday, a guy wrote to Amy Alkon about his wife getting fat and not being attracted to her, and now a similar letter is in Amy Dickinson. Different answers this time. As for LW2 in Amy D. today, the exact same letter appeared in Carolyn Hax a few days ago, although Amy's version is somewhat edited. What is going on?
Cass, obviously some LWs write to more than one advice columnist. They must hope that the more columnists they write, the better their chances of being published. It happens on the editorial pages too; I've seen the same letter to the editor appear in the Washington Post and the LA Times.
Ivory Dove

San Antonio, TX

#10 Mar 28, 2009
At least these letters seem real.

Same for the letters about difficult relatives
and co workers, the man who chose to have a
vasectomy and not get reversed, and the people
with medical needs.
eva

Schererville, IN

#11 Mar 28, 2009
Did Amy really need that much space to tell LW1 that her boyfriend is an ass****? And that she needed to lose weight, but for the right reason? Sometimes the answer is as plain as the nose on a person's face.
old enough

New Castle, DE

#12 Mar 28, 2009
LW1 should break up with the jerk (he will always find an excuse not to marry) then lose the 90 pounds for YOURSELF! There will be other boyfriends.
Frank

New Orleans, LA

#13 Mar 28, 2009
She loses weight or he won't marry her? Shoe is now on the other food and it doesn't feel so good huh? Women have been trying to change men for years (to no avail) so why is this now his problem? Amy, would your response have been the same if she wouldn't marry him because of his weight?
liner

Bronx, NY

#14 Mar 28, 2009
Dear Fluffy, go ahead and cross that bridge with him.......and when you get to the middle, toss him off....
ugo

United States

#15 Mar 28, 2009
LW1: I do not understand why Amy does a 180 turn at the end of her answer. His ultimatum should serve as a major red flag that he's not ready for marriage at best and at worst could be an early sign of an emotional abuser. Credit to him for being honest with you, but you deserve to be loved for better or worse.(Yes, losing weight is a good idea, but that's not the point; this is not about your weight. It's about him attempting to manipulate you where you are particularly vulnerable.)
If you are not ready or willing to walk away and be glad to have "dodged the bullet" therapy might help, but the conversation should NOT begin with asking him to further define "the hoop," but with exploring why he thinks it's acceptable to hold a hoop up on this issue in the first place and what having that hoop hanging in the air does to both of you.
Good luck to you.
Cynthia

Winter Haven, FL

#16 Mar 28, 2009
Re LW1. Dump the guy, lose the weight, find someone who loves you for you and not entirely on what you look like. Having said that, a person cannot help not being turned on by someone they find unattractive. Ever get in the mood and when your love object drew near their breath smelled like 100 camels had camped out in their mouth overnight????? LOL Talk about turn-off!
Bob Dylan

Chicago, IL

#18 Mar 28, 2009
sue wrote:
I remember standing in a parking space -- holding it -- telling other would be parkers to move on while I waited for my hubby to bring the car around. I got in the face of a dude that wanted to park in the space - I wouldn't give it up. He wanted to call the cops but my hubby drove up in time and parked in my saved spot. Then we went to the show (this was in Lincoln Park btw). You do have to be careful about doing something like this - tires can get slashed. I wanted to save the close parking spot because the hubby has Ankylosing Spondylitis and walking long distances is difficult for him sometimes. Technically, saving a spot like that is not kosher (especially during a major show) but there it is. I did it and I do not apologize.
It is rude and you should apologize.
WHAT A GUY

Hollywood, FL

#20 Mar 28, 2009
So when he goes bald should she divorce him if he doesn't go get a hair transplant?

“Merry Holidays!”

Since: Mar 08

Location hidden

#21 Mar 28, 2009
LW1: I agree with ugo. That was weird and bad advice. She should dump him. Her boyfriend seems to have the potential (could be currntly) controlling. I think it has the earmarks of an abusive relationship.

LW2: The LW still isn't mature enough.

LW3: I'll skip this one.
BBW

Naperville, IL

#23 Mar 28, 2009
What this woman need to do is lose the guy. If she marries him and has a baby and doesn't lose the weight, he will threaten to divorce her or start cheating and blame it on her.
Healthy bodies come in all shapes and sizes. The diet industry is a multi-billion dollar enterprise which preys upon situations just like this one. Eating right and exercizing is part of healthy living but lets not forget our emotional health. Women are more than numbers on a scale or fannies stuffed into tight jeans.

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