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#42 Jul 3, 2012
It's amazing how a person can love how she loved!!! One of the things that she gave me as a man, is apart of her unbelievable heart! I know this because of how I love my children.... My God, is there any greater accomplishment in life!!! We look at accomplishing so many things throughout our lives. And in doing so sometimes we forget about the little things when it comes to our children! In the beginning of my journey as a man I was heading down that path... A path where success and the pursuit of success had became my focus. It's amazing how such a tragedy can help you as much as it hurt you. I remember in one of the conversations we had a month before she died, she had warned me about being humble! She said, "son, you have achieved so much in life. You have a home, you have beautiful children, you have your beautiful vehicles and you are financially in a great position"... "But if you don't have God what does it all mean"? And like any person who feels there invincible, I said, "I know mom, I know..." She followed by saying, "James, all I'm trying to say son is God has a way of humbling us and if we don't listen to him sometimes it's not in a way that is good." I remember when she said that it got my attention! I remember feeling a bit concerned, maybe a little upset as I looked at her. I said, "mom, what do you mean?" "Are you talking about my money? My home & cars? My children? My health? My relationship?" I then said, "why would God humble me? I'm not a bad person! I don't drink! I don't do drugs! I work hard for my family! I don't cause hurt to anyone! I'm not a bad person!" She looked at me with a concern look on her face as if I didn't get it! And as she looked at me I felt through her eyes I was missing the point. When I left her that day her words kept playing over and over in my head! I kept feeling ignorant to what she was trying to tell me. Or being ignorant non the less! Sometimes in life we feel we have things all figured out... I was so focused on my life and success that I couldn't understand the simple message she had given me!I was so occupied trying to figure out what she meant, and being so defensive to what is was God could take from me that I was blind to what it truly was she had known or was talking about... But God knew! And through her he was warning me! Less than a month after we had talked about me being humble, my mother was dead! And she was right, God had humbled me! It wasn't through my children. It wasn't through the material things I had put so much stock into! It was through my heart!!! The one thing I didn't think about! The one thing that wasn't listening when she was talking & warning me! I was listening with my mind! And was trying so hard to make sense of her words that I didn't feel them...See my mom wasn't sick! She didn't get hit by a car! She didn't have a stroke or heart attack! She wasn't murdered! None of the typical ways a person normally passes away! It was simply her time to go meet God! That's all I can say as I write this in tears... God had let her stay with us long enough! To teach! To preach! To love! And to raise her children & grandchildren! Then he called her home! And that's story of my mother! My heart! My angel!As I fight back my tears while writing this I can't help but feel inspired! Maybe God wanted me to share with all of you a little part of my mother... Or my story. Not sure! But I will stay as I started in this message earlier, she taught me what true love is... And how to be a loving parent! I mean how to deeply love my children. There is no greater love!!! And through my unconditional love for my children do I see how she loved me... And how much God must love us all!!!Thank you for reading my story...
#43 Jul 3, 2012
I just finished reading all of the amazing and kind words about my mother Josephine (To check it out Google James L. McFadden and look under "Woman found dead at Milerton Lake". It was my mother... As my eyes watered reading all of your comments I realized something. My God in heaven actually allowed me to meet a real "ANGEL". For those of you who knew her, you know exactly what I mean... She was the best of the best!!! The greatest example of what God intended a woman to be and a soldier of his kingdom to be! I can't explain it... What is was like being raised and loved by her. No matter what struggle life put in our way, she made the world a beautiful place. When you were near her it became easier to breathe. She had a way of making you believe in yourself! She was a fan of people and life... Her goal in life was to make others smile! To help others prosper! She was my mother, my father, my protector, my teacher and my HERO!!! All I am today is because of her... I have 4 children, 2 step children, and a God sent wife that I could only have been blessed with because of her prayers for me to find my true love! I've been in business for 18 years now. I'm 40 years old, healthy and have no health issues (by the grace of God). I'm working on a business project that may mean millions of dollars for my business and family. And I say all this to say that all these things I have I owe to my BREATH TAKINGLY BEAUTIFUL MOTHER!!! She taught me so much. But most of all she taught me how to love & believe in myself. I remember we had a conversation the month before she died on her birthday. She told me to get out of the relationship I was in at the time. She told me I was the best father she could hope for me to be. She said she was proud of me as her son. And the words I will never forget... She told me if she have had the husband she always wanted he would be someone just like me!!! She melted my soul with those words.. And it was then that I truly with no doubt had belief in myself and I had found how to put myself first and love me!!! Which is something I had lost focus of... I say this because as I read all of your testimonies I feel that what my mother was so great at was... LOVING!!! And making others feel LOVED!!! She made you believe! And if you knew her you knew God!!! I remember she told me I was a one in a million. As I smiled at her, she explained why... She said son, you know how a man and woman has kids right? And as I chuckled, she explained how there are millions of tiny sperm that try to get into a woman's egg, and that out of all those millions of sperm... You made it!!! There for you are a one in a million!!! To all of you who read this, to all of you who knew her, to everyone in this world... I James L. McFadden give you the words of my extraordinary mother, God's eternal soldier and a real life angel... YOU ARE A ONE IN A MILLION!!!! Don't let anyone ever tell you any different! Believe in yourself! Love yourself! And while you read this and after your done, raise your head, put out your chest and say... I AM A ONE IN A MILLION!!! Because a Angel named Josephine Roman Gilliard said so!!! Thank God for you mom! And for those of you who wish you knew her, just close your eyes and think of the most beautiful thing you've ever seen... And try hard! I mean really hard! And once you've seen the beautiful image, multiply it by a billion and there you go! My mother, Josephine. She mentored children, she raised children, she loved everyone, she was a blessing to all who knew her, and I believe a blessing to you if you fully have read all of these wonderful things about her. As my mom would have said if you knew her, God bless you and I love you!!!
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