Im married but in love with someone else

Im married but in love with someone else

Posted in the Oceana Forum

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hopelesslove100

Germany

#1 Sep 26, 2007
I dont know what to do im married but been in love with someone else for about 4 months now i cant leave my husband cuz i know it would hurt him more then not saying anything ... its tearing me apart
curious

United States

#2 Sep 26, 2007
Does the other man have feelings for you? Have you already been intimate with him? It would probably hurt him more if you cheated on him rather than left him for another man. So I think that if you and the other guy want to be together then tell your husband and see what happens from there. One more question, is your husband good to you?
hopelesslove100

Germany

#3 Sep 27, 2007
he isnt bad 2 me but his daughter is ruining our marriage totally ... shes 23 years old has a lil daughter herself doesnt take care of her and all this other stuff and my husband pays her bills cuz she is excuse my language a fuck up ... i havent met the other man yet but i will soon so in my eyes i havent really cheated i just dont know what 2 do i really would like 2 talk 2 someone cuz im all alone
I would love to talk

Philadelphia, PA

#4 Sep 27, 2007
Ive been in love with a a married man b4 it was when I was younger and it was so hard for me to let him go and I moved on and Im married now but I do still love the other manits been 9 years Ive not had any contact with him at all. Is This man Married and what does he want?? it is hard once you fall in love you cant control how you feel. Do you live in Germany??
curious

United States

#5 Sep 27, 2007
Well sometimes you got to let your children take care of them self and at 23 she should be taking care of herself. I know you probably feel alone and out of place so speak your mind and if your husband don't see what your saying. Then leave. My step dad is the same way with his daughters. He won't buy my mom shit but he gives his kids about 300.00 a month and my mom has to scrap up money and save pop cans just to pay the bills. You are his new family and if he don't respect you enough to tell his daughter that she needs to take care of herself then you don't need him. So good luck and keep in touch!
hopelesslove100

Germany

#6 Sep 28, 2007
I moved for my husband 2 the states all my family lives in germany...i been married now almost 2 years i was happy at first but now i hate being with my husband i long for this other man ...
Sometimes i want 2 just leave but i dont know how 2 ?its sort of the same thing he pays her credit cards and stuff and 2 me he says there is no money its just not right and im tired of it....
anyone of ya have a yahoo or msn messenger?
curious

United States

#7 Sep 29, 2007
Sounds like he is making her #1 in his life and if she was underage then if would be ok but she is an adult. I wouldn't care if it upset him if you left, some men can't see the light until something like that does happen, and if you leave will his daughter come and clean and cook for him like you do? Probably not! So let him mess his life up, he will realize what he had after your gone!!! I know for a fact it will only get worse because it starts out a few dollars here then its I need a house payment, I need a vehicle payment!!!! So if I were you I would save up a little money and go find a new honey!!!!!
hopelesslove100

Hamburg, Germany

#8 Sep 29, 2007
for the first time someone is seeing it from my point of view ... usually i hear how bad of a person i am 2 for wanting 2 leave i mean how much can a person take? do u live in charleston wv?
1 post removed
hopelesslove100

Hamburg, Germany

#10 Sep 29, 2007
i dont think it will get any better cuz hes not willing to change... i need someone who i can have kids with someone closer to my age i know it sounds selfish but i truly believe that the man im talkin to is the man i wanna grow old with we have more in common and there are no strings attached to him i know when i got married i took him with his kids but he has crossed the line of feeling bad and stuff... would u wanna fight all the time??
now i got another problem i dont know how to tell the one im talkin to that im still married?
curious

United States

#11 Sep 29, 2007
No, I don't live in charleston, I don't know why that put that there. I live in Iaeger, WV. Where do you live? Well about your situation, if you really don't want to leave your husband then I wouldn't tell the other man that your married but if you really want to leave and I think that you should then I would call him and tell him that you need to tell him something but you don't want it to change anything and tell it all. Tell him that you do plan on leaving when the time is right and you really do care for him deeply. It will be easier than you think. If he really cares for you he will understand and he will wait for you but don't keep him waiting very long. I think that you know what you are doing and it is the right thing. You can't live your life for someone else. You know what will make you happy so do it! Let me know what happens and if you want to talk more I will be on here alot to help you! Take care!
COWGAL

AOL

#12 Sep 29, 2007
I have aol aim my screen name is americancalgal. This is hard for you to do. I would tell the man your married and see what happens just tell him your willing to leave your husband. Your happiness is important. I have a sister that has been married for 20 + years and she is just now leaving her husband. Girl you do what you have to. But you have to come clean with this other man.
hopelesslove100

Hamburg, Germany

#13 Sep 29, 2007
i live around charleston actually... i was thinking about telling him in person cuz i just think it will be better to explain and to talk about it then over the phone dont ya think?
Im sort of afraid though i cant blame the other man if he were to leave ...i think i will just say i want to be with u and im goin to leave i just need to get my life in order before... i cant just drop everything right then and there...
i really thank yall for your support im really thankful for it... family and friends they dont understand cuz they just see it that this is not all as bad as it seems ...
curious

United States

#14 Sep 29, 2007
Yell I think it would be better if you could tell him in person, but I couldn't tell someone something like that in person. You must be a strong woman!!!!! Thats a good quality... I hope he understands and waits for you until your ready to start your life with him, Good luck and stay strong!!!!!
hopelesslove100

Seevetal, Germany

#15 Sep 30, 2007
so many bad relationships, abuse ,rape i gotta be strong otherwise i wouldnt be alive 2day...
life goes on .... ill keep in touch ...only 25 more days until im telling...
1 post removed
hopelesslove100

Seevetal, Germany

#17 Oct 1, 2007
And who r u?
1 post removed
COWGAL

Philadelphia, PA

#19 Oct 1, 2007
YEah tell him and see how he feels and what he wants. Let us know how it turns out. I wish you all the happiness you can stand.
hopelesslove100

Germany

#20 Oct 1, 2007
i tried to write u cowgal
hopelesslove100

Germany

#21 Oct 1, 2007
loving charm
what makes u think u the right man ?
CowGal

AOL

#22 Oct 1, 2007
[email protected] if you want to email me.
1 post removed
curious

United States

#24 Oct 2, 2007
It sounds like charm is trying to charm you! HA nothing wrong with a little fun I guess, I haven't wrote you in a while so I figured I would check on you and see how everything is going. Do you still feel the same way you did before? Don't get butterflies and chicken out. Keep your head up and explore every opportunity that comes your way, even charm!!!!! stay strong!!!!

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