Are black men allergic to fatherhood?

Posted in the Newburgh Forum

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Tiger

Indianapolis, IN

#1 Apr 26, 2013
Ok My theory is because many just don't feel any connection with the children. Why? I'm not sure but I believe many brothers just weren't cut out to be fathers. If they had it their way they would go through life smashing kids without ever procreating but that's nearly impossible as we can see. Thoughts?
boppy

Indianapolis, IN

#2 Apr 26, 2013
because black men been trying to regain their power ever since slavery. and this is one bastardized form of feeling like a man.inseminating women and not having to deal with the result. they getting away with murder and they fkng love it because it makes them feel powerful.
Really

Boonville, IN

#3 Apr 26, 2013
No, it's not black men it's the n**g*s who are so pityful that they can't do for theirselves, let alone a child. They have no desire to do anything other than what they have always done. Which is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. A man is going to do what a man was made to do. Which is provide and protect!!! If you can't do that then you are not a man!! So that leaves them to be n**g*s, slugs, anything other than useful. It is very sad I will say.
Coco Honeypuff

Indianapolis, IN

#4 Apr 26, 2013
Sorry I can't relate. My father was a hard working BM that took care of his. He raised his sons my brothers to do the same and they have. After our fathers' demise they are still taking care of business.

I guess its all in how a person is raised and if those parents led by example as well.
Ms Naturalhair32

Indianapolis, IN

#5 Apr 26, 2013
Because black women don't hold black men responsible anymore. Back in the day you had to get married, and get a job to support the woman and child. Now black women are like whatever I get welfare.So in essense its democrats fault for extending welfare all these years. When it wasn't suppose to last this long. Just for the great depression.So basically welfare has replaced the man in the family.
tbtjdpdr

Evansville, IN

#6 Apr 26, 2013
Really wrote:
No, it's not black men it's the n**g*s who are so pityful that they can't do for theirselves, let alone a child. They have no desire to do anything other than what they have always done. Which is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. A man is going to do what a man was made to do. Which is provide and protect!!! If you can't do that then you are not a man!! So that leaves them to be n**g*s, slugs, anything other than useful. It is very sad I will say.
Agree
Opinion

Indianapolis, IN

#7 Apr 26, 2013
Sad to say this, but most men's excuse is that they don't want to deal with the mothers of the children.

They want to play the field for YEARS, then once a woman is expecting they are gone like a bat outta hell. It also makes things easier as in many, not all, cases, the parents are not married.
Biracialbutterfl y

Indianapolis, IN

#8 Apr 26, 2013
Tiger wrote:
Ok My theory is because many just don't feel any connection with the children. Why? I'm not sure but I believe many brothers just weren't cut out to be fathers. If they had it their way they would go through life smashing kids without ever procreating but that's nearly impossible as we can see. Thoughts?
I think this would be less of an issue if the women these men are procreating with made better and smarter choices in men. Lets not put all the blame on the men, he women are partly to blame and should held accountable as well, after all it takes two to tango.

Since: Oct 10

Evansville, IN

#9 Apr 26, 2013
What a dumbass thread by a dumbass person. There's deadbeat fathers in all races. I personally know black losers who aren't there for their kids and I know white losers who are absent fathers as well. It's not about race, it's about mentality. You only posted this because you are the type of loser that gets a kick out of pissing people off. You must have such a miserable existence. I feel so sorry for you. I hope your life gets better soon.

Since: Oct 10

Evansville, IN

#10 Apr 26, 2013
Coco Honeypuff wrote:
Sorry I can't relate. My father was a hard working BM that took care of his. He raised his sons my brothers to do the same and they have. After our fathers' demise they are still taking care of business.

I guess its all in how a person is raised and if those parents led by example as well.
Great post. I can totally relate. It's always refreshing to see there are actually some good people on this site.
Tamia F

Indianapolis, IN

#11 Apr 26, 2013
There is something to be said for the Moynihan theory about welfare and black illegitimacy rates, but blacks aren't the only ones on welfare. And not all children are born to women on welfare. And the Moynihan theory only addresses the financial aspect, but the issue is emotional. There is an epidemic emotionally disconnected black men who show little to no interest in their offspring. That's freakish. How do you lack empathy and the ability to emotionally bond with your child? Women aren't taught to love their babies. It's a human trait. These deadbeats can have other emotionally fulfilling relationships. What is it about their own progeny that turns them off? And as far as wanting screw for life, all males of every race want that. And some of them still do that while caring for their seed.
Northern Belle Lady

Indianapolis, IN

#12 Apr 26, 2013
Studies show that a man's connection to his children depends on his connection to the mother.

High # of OOW births mean that he probably never lived with his kids and probably won't stay with the mother.

High OOW births also mean that more low quality men that wouldn't be good fathers get to procreate anyway. These low quality men also seem to produce more children, leaving more kids with deadbeat dads.

The cycle continues because men who didn't have a good father growing up don't have a model of what a father is supposed to be.
Yes

Indianapolis, IN

#13 Apr 26, 2013
Tamia F wrote:
There is something to be said for the Moynihan theory about welfare and black illegitimacy rates, but blacks aren't the only ones on welfare. And not all children are born to women on welfare. And the Moynihan theory only addresses the financial aspect, but the issue is emotional. There is an epidemic emotionally disconnected black men who show little to no interest in their offspring. That's freakish. How do you lack empathy and the ability to emotionally bond with your child? Women aren't taught to love their babies. It's a human trait. These deadbeats can have other emotionally fulfilling relationships. What is it about their own progeny that turns them off? And as far as wanting screw for life, all males of every race want that. And some of them still do that while caring for their seed.
More Black men are becoming sociopathic like their white counterparts. I don't know if it is just me but some of the worst sociopaths I have ever seen or heard of were all white males.
Jeff

Evansville, IN

#14 Apr 26, 2013
Licensed_2Carry wrote:
What a dumbass thread by a dumbass person. There's deadbeat fathers in all races. I personally know black losers who aren't there for their kids and I know white losers who are absent fathers as well. It's not about race, it's about mentality. You only posted this because you are the type of loser that gets a kick out of pissing people off. You must have such a miserable existence. I feel so sorry for you. I hope your life gets better soon.
Your the only one pissed off, talk about a miserable existence. For the most part, others seem to be agreeing.
Psschhh

Indianapolis, IN

#15 Apr 26, 2013
I don't believe this a bait thread to anger people like a poster above suggested. I rather see a thread like this than all the other bullshit threads on this site. Deadbeats come in all colors and there's plenty of deadbeat mothers too. This is a serious issue to address.
Bridgette Peoples

Indianapolis, IN

#16 Apr 26, 2013
Here is what I believe.

It seems that in the late 70's (during the Feminist movement and drug epidemic), all of the Civil Rights work to solidify the black community was undone. Black men were going to prison for drug abuse, dealing and crime while black women were starting to get into the feminist movement. Because the men were absent, the black community became what it is now today, the only matriarchal society. For some reason, the men never took back their place as the man of the household, they just lazily made the woman do all the work while paying the bills and rearing the kids. Strange.
Seriously

Indianapolis, IN

#17 Apr 26, 2013
Why does ANY man abandon his children? You are right on about them not having any emotional connection to the children. Ask any man why he doesn't take care of and support his, and you will see that there are many answers to that question.
Abc

Duluth, GA

#18 Apr 26, 2013
Hahahaha this might be the funniest truest statements I read on here!!! Oh & by the way I'm black with a GREAT dad who would never let anyone/anything keep him from us. But it seems this new generation are like you said allergic to fatherhood smh
Lady

Indianapolis, IN

#19 Apr 26, 2013
Bridgette Peoples wrote:
Here is what I believe.
It seems that in the late 70's (during the Feminist movement and drug epidemic), all of the Civil Rights work to solidify the black community was undone. Black men were going to prison for drug abuse, dealing and crime while black women were starting to get into the feminist movement. Because the men were absent, the black community became what it is now today, the only matriarchal society. For some reason, the men never took back their place as the man of the household, they just lazily made the woman do all the work while paying the bills and rearing the kids. Strange.
I agree with you even though you are going to get knocked to Hell and back on here for your opinion.

The only part of the feminist movement that I support and will always support is what women fought for from the late 19th century to the 1970s and that was the right to be treated like a first class citizen. All of this grrrl movement/anti-slut shaming feminism of today ain't stank.

I will disagree with you on the Black community being matriarchal now. The Black community has always been matriarchal and patriarchal. Black women held up the family in ways the white woman didn't know how to. When the Black father was away or dead, the mother held the family together. Have you seen the movie "Sounder" with Cicily Tyson and Paul Whitfield? Black mothers raised their sons back then to be MEN with the help of other men in the community.

Nowadays, these Black mamas ain't doing shit and are VOLUNTARILY choosing to be single parents by choosing sorry ass men or "sperm donors" and saying bullshit like "I can be both mama and daddy". Their sons learn to be men by Negroes in the street, rappers on TV, or hearing their mama bash black men in their faces.
AfricanSunrise

Indianapolis, IN

#20 Apr 26, 2013
I think the great Kola Boof said if best. Black men put no value on the Black womb, Procreating with Black women gives them no skin priveleges; however, procreating with a white woman does; however, it doesn't quite explain why they leave those children too.

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