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Since: Sep 12

Geneva, IL

#1 Sep 14, 2012
I have known my wife for 2.5 yrs. and been married for 15 months. I just found out that she has been lying to me about all of her education, past jobs, her age(she is younger than she told me by a year) and her childhood. I found out by having a heart to heart with her dad and then confronted her she admitted lying to me about everything. I still love her, I would have married her without all the stuff she told me she was, but now my heart is crushed. I have forgiven her, but I dont know what to do next...Trying to find a marriage counselor now...I dont believe on divorce but Im struggling with my ability to maintain intimacy in our relationship.

Since: Dec 11

Location hidden

#2 Sep 14, 2012
Any kids?
reddog

Saint Francisville, LA

#3 Sep 14, 2012
JohnStanley wrote:
I have known my wife for 2.5 yrs. and been married for 15 months. I just found out that she has been lying to me about all of her education, past jobs, her age(she is younger than she told me by a year) and her childhood. I found out by having a heart to heart with her dad and then confronted her she admitted lying to me about everything. I still love her, I would have married her without all the stuff she told me she was, but now my heart is crushed. I have forgiven her, but I dont know what to do next...Trying to find a marriage counselor now...I dont believe on divorce but Im struggling with my ability to maintain intimacy in our relationship.
you are a FOOL!! now send that skank to my house i bang her for you!!!!
JohnS

Schiller Park, IL

#4 Sep 14, 2012
Anyone been through something like this or have any suggestions?
JohnS

Schiller Park, IL

#5 Sep 14, 2012
No kids She had a miss carriage of a set of twins that she told me were mine....I was 11 months into my vasectomy and had checked clear by my urologist...I dont know what to believe anymore.
Mona

Jarreau, LA

#6 Sep 14, 2012
reddog wrote:
<quoted text>you are a FOOL!! now send that skank to my house i bang her for you!!!!
You areout the coldest DOUCH BAG that ever walked this earth! The dude oughta whip up on your skank spook a**!!!
JohnS

Schiller Park, IL

#7 Sep 14, 2012
We lost the twins at 22 weeks 12 days later we got married.
JohnS

Schiller Park, IL

#8 Sep 14, 2012
Thanks Mona. There are always gonna be people like Reddog I just filter them out...He may be right about me being a fool...but who knows. Marriage is for better or worse though I made a promise to love her no matter what.

“Karma is my friend”

Since: Feb 11

Look over your shoulder

#9 Sep 14, 2012
JohnS wrote:
Anyone been through something like this or have any suggestions?
Yeah, I can relate. I knew Woodsman_1 for over a year and fell head over heals from a distance. He moved to Seattle to be with me and it took only six months to find out that everything he told me about himself was a lie. Everything. It was a crushing blow for me, and I know exactly how you feel, if he had told the truth it would have made no difference. But the fact that he lied on so many levels left me in a space where I couldn't trust him at all. Everything I thought I knew about him had to be second guessed. How can you build a future without trust? So I called him out and his excuse for lying was so lame that I lost all respect for the man. No trust, no respect...there was no future but that didn't stop Mitch Major Woodsman_1 from proposing to me.

Of course, I had to refuse his proposal of marriage out of pure honesty. No way can a marry a man I don't trust or have respect for, ya know?

I'm greatful I learned the truth before I took a vow of loyalty. I'm sorry for your own situation.

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Mona

Jarreau, LA

#10 Sep 14, 2012
JohnS wrote:
Thanks Mona. There are always gonna be people like Reddog I just filter them out...He may be right about me being a fool...but who knows. Marriage is for better or worse though I made a promise to love her no matter what.
You really seem like a good person and have a good heart! I hope everything works out for the two of you! Good Luck John!
Jay

New Roads, LA

#12 Sep 15, 2012
John,
People do not change, neither will she. You stay and accept the situation or you do not and leave.
daniel

Denham Springs, LA

#13 Sep 15, 2012
This turns me on!!!
SMH

Walker, LA

#14 Sep 15, 2012
JohnS wrote:
Thanks Mona. There are always gonna be people like Reddog I just filter them out...He may be right about me being a fool...but who knows. Marriage is for better or worse though I made a promise to love her no matter what.
It's not a marriage if everything is based on a lie and it can be annulled by the church. I would check into that. The person u think you love is not that person! Sorry!:/ Good Luck!
the truth

United States

#16 Sep 15, 2012
Dawn Marcelle wrote:
<quoted text>Yeah, I can relate. I knew Woodsman_1 for over a year and fell head over heals from a distance. He moved to Seattle to be with me and it took only six months to find out that everything he told me about himself was a lie. Everything. It was a crushing blow for me, and I know exactly how you feel, if he had told the truth it would have made no difference. But the fact that he lied on so many levels left me in a space where I couldn't trust him at all. Everything I thought I knew about him had to be second guessed. How can you build a future without trust? So I called him out and his excuse for lying was so lame that I lost all respect for the man. No trust, no respect...there was no future but that didn't stop Mitch Major Woodsman_1 from proposing to me.
Of course, I had to refuse his proposal of marriage out of pure honesty. No way can a marry a man I don't trust or have respect for, ya know?
I'm greatful I learned the truth before I took a vow of loyalty. I'm sorry for your own situation.
Woodsman_1 is a complete moron who fancies himself to be a popular font of wisdom. Of course the reality is anything but. He spends his life on Topix, nosing into everything and then coming back under other names to reply to himself and to put negative comments and negative symbols over anything that say anything against him and positive symbols on his own.

Notice that no other comments get so many judging marks on them. Watch and see if this comment doesn't get quite a few negative judgement symbols.

Really Woodman_1..... get a life!

Since: Dec 11

Location hidden

#17 Sep 15, 2012
Run John run! Get out now!
Advice

New Roads, LA

#18 Sep 15, 2012
NOTFADEAWAY wrote:
Run John run! Get out now!
I agree, John! Life is too short. You already knew your answer....when both individuals don't take their vows seriously, I don't think God would condemn you for continuing to live in your situation. There are many women out here that are waiting for a decent guy to come their way that have the same values as you! Like I said before, you already know what you need to do.
Advice

New Roads, LA

#19 Sep 15, 2012
Sorry....NOT continuing to live....
Nino

United States

#20 Sep 17, 2012
If she lied about her age, her educational background, and her past, what is she still lying about, and what will she be lying about in the future. You almost got hooked for twins they may or may not be yours. I she gets knocked up while you are married and the DNA shows it isn't yours, you still (by state law) have to pay her child support for a child that is not yours.

You'd better get out while the gettin's good. Even though you know you need to go, and everyone on here is telling you to go, I will bet that you don't leave. And, at some point in the future (after it's too late) you will wish that you had left.
JohnS

United States

#21 Sep 17, 2012
Thank you for yiur comments. Unfortunately this is my 3rd marriage. My first did not survive my career as a cop and my son getting leukemia. The second one didnt survive aviation, she cheated on me while I was based oit of O'Hare in Chicago. My current wife is 20 years younger than me. She recently told me that she lied to make me fall in love with her...shes been lying to her parents for years too....she said she is a people pleaser and wants the acceptence of those around her. She said she feels like her life is insignificant especially compared to mine. I was a California beat cop for 15 years in the ghetto before becoming an airline pilot for a major airline....she said she cant compete with that....I told there is no competition and that I love her for who she is as a person. Im ready to pull the trigger on this if I have too, but I gotta give her a chance to change if she can if not then we will go from there...Trying to trust her right now is very hard though.
matt

Denham Springs, LA

#22 Sep 17, 2012
JohnS wrote:
Thank you for yiur comments. Unfortunately this is my 3rd marriage. My first did not survive my career as a cop and my son getting leukemia. The second one didnt survive aviation, she cheated on me while I was based oit of O'Hare in Chicago. My current wife is 20 years younger than me. She recently told me that she lied to make me fall in love with her...shes been lying to her parents for years too....she said she is a people pleaser and wants the acceptence of those around her. She said she feels like her life is insignificant especially compared to mine. I was a California beat cop for 15 years in the ghetto before becoming an airline pilot for a major airline....she said she cant compete with that....I told there is no competition and that I love her for who she is as a person. Im ready to pull the trigger on this if I have too, but I gotta give her a chance to change if she can if not then we will go from there...Trying to trust her right now is very hard though.
if she cheats once and she knows she can get away with it then she will do it again. Its the sad truth. Sometimes things just arent meant to work out. Im only 14 but i've seen and know enough about this kind of stuff to give you a true answer

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