|
TaranaNostangia
Olympia, WA
|
Dreamgirl wrote: <quoted text> Apparently, Amy Savoie has been married THREE times, to Sullivan, Miga and to Savoie. The 3 kids were born with which father(s)? How many fathers are "co-parenting" with joint custody now? So many questions and so few answers. That's just official, "how about on the side?" She will beat Liz Taylor soon!
|
|
Superman
Bucharest, Romania
|
bkh wrote: well the problem is that a lot of japanese father don't bother to get involved in child lives.. it is a tradition in the old days .. yes time has changed but in the old days dads did not get involved usually the mothers parents take care of the kids too.. also in japan marriage is usally arranged ... also how can you say know the preson you marry ? does that not apply to anyone who plans to marry and not just for Japanese ? It doesn't matter if your Japanese or of any other nationality. People should know well the person they are going to marry unless they're not afraid of divorce and its consequences. bkh wrote: Depending on parents background marriage are arranged in the old days. It is less than before but still existing in Japan. Once woman divorce the arranged marriage and if they do have kids.. the woman and the kids stays with her parents. The father is majority of the time out of the picture.. but all depends on case by case... Arranged marriages make sense in Japan. Generally speaking, men spend almost no time with their family so women marry them to have children and easy money. No time to be together, this means many cheat on their spouse unless they don't want sex. Japanese's culture and mentality has everything to do with their life style. It is too much to talk about.
|
|
TNMtMan
Tokyo, Japan
|
Judged:
2
I may have to jump back into the discussion after reading this bizarre, pathetic, utterly confusing and embarrassing diary entry: http://search.japantimes.co.jp/cgi-bin/fl2009...
|
|
TNMtMan
Tokyo, Japan
|
It's such sophomoric, pitiful writing ... off the bat I can't trust the writer. I can understand the wife having an affair being married to such a sniffling emotional exhibitionist. Comparing Savoie with Richard Cory .. my god ... I thought I was going to throw up. it's a wonder the Japan Times is still up and running with editors at the wheel that allow such drivel to be published. Can you image the kind of person who goes around claiming, "I am a Cory." Let me try it. "Hi everybody!" I am a wealthy, educated, debonair man that many women seek, I am the man that many men aspire to become .... and I am going to blow my brains out!!" Now I am going to pass the pity hat. My wife ... my Japanese wife ... is such a meany. Woe is me! Woe is me!
|
|
Dreamgirl
Hirakata, Japan
|
TNMtMan wrote: I may have to jump back into the discussion after reading this bizarre, pathetic, utterly confusing and embarrassing diary entry: http://search.japantimes.co.jp/cgi-bin/fl2009... That has to be the most bizarre thing I have ever read in the Japan Times. The writer is supposedly revealing all sorts of terrible truths in his personal life -- but he does so anonymously! Sure, that would make a great post on this Forum by, say, SavoieShadow. But absolutely nothing in the essay can be verified, except that HYPOTHETICALLY this situation might somehow develop. The reason I think Savoie is the writer is because it bears his marks of using legal knowledge to manipulate and mislead people. It looks as if, after consulting various divorce lawyers, he conconcted a fantastic worst-case scenario and had it published as if this was normality. He is hoping that readers will draw this conclusion, as well as the more specific conclusion that his own ex-wife was this bad. If so, the essay is nothing but more Savoie bad-mouthing. I look forward to comments by Sally or others knowledgeable in Japanese law, to dispute the legal assertions in the essay. Of course all the other assertions of a personal nature are made by the father, who is portraying himself as a long-suffering wonderful person. If you are going to be "brave" enough to write such a "confession" (in which one's confessions all concern the wife, not oneself!!!), then you have to sign your name and be willing to withstand questioning and inquiry. Otherwise there is nothing at all brave about the essay -- contrarily it is the most cowardly debased writing I have ever seen in a respectable news outlet like Japan Times. And of course the despicable cowardice and mean-spiritedness of the writing also points to it being authored by Chris/Amy Savoie. The Japan Times should be embarrassed for publishing this nonsense, and probably should issue some form of retraction unless they are willing to verify that all the statements are true.
|
|
TNMtMan
Tokyo, Japan
|
I just read the story again because it is compelling like a very bad traffic accident. Mind you, I also twice read the story about the South Carolina man that was sent to prison for having sex with a horse. I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help myself. I think there are parallels between the two stories. • Both the Horse Whisperer and the Author / Confessor need professional help and should not be publishing their affairs online. • Both ought to be embarrassed by their situations. • Both were involve in love triangles (however I have sympathy for the horse, the horse owner and the Horse Whisperer) What's different in the South Carolina story us that no one is maligning horses or people from South Carolina. The anonymous writer found himself in a failed marriage and wants us to make the leap that marrying Japanese is risky business. Now he wants to give all young love struck men sage and stern advice to think twice before marrying a Japanese woman. There is, actually, pity to be had. I pity his wife. http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091105/ap_on_re_... --
|
|
TNMtMan
Tokyo, Japan
|
I'm going to be nice and give the boy some advice: 1. Grow a pair. 2. Don't divorce her. 3. Get all you finances separate and in order. 4. Move across the street if possible - if the situation is as you say it is, the kids may spend all their free time at your place. 5. Don't tell anybody else your story. 6. If the guy shows up again,(did you grow a pair?) kick the sh#t out of him. This is not cavemen BS of fighting over a woman, it's more dog like. He's marking his territory in your yard, and you are just standing there, washing the dishes, and watching. 7. Keep your day job, a writing career is not in your future.
|
|
Batman
Bucharest, Romania
|
"I'm going to treat you poorly until you divorce me. Why don't you just leave? You're a gaijin! This is my country, not yours! I'm Japanese!" I don't think he made this up. That's about all I can say about his article. He thought about suicide so maybe he is very sensitive. By the way, not bad advice, though he can improve his writing and need not get the Police involved because of beating that guy up :) He should fight for his wife and family and not just stand there and watch how he's marriage breaks apart.
|
|
|
|
Dreamgirl
Hirakata, Japan
|
TNMtMan wrote: after reading this bizarre, pathetic, utterly confusing and embarrassing diary entry: http://search.japantimes.co.jp/cgi-bin/fl2009... Yeah, I re-read this crap a couple of times too. It was just too bizarre to ignore. Quotes from the essay with comments: "Imagine how shocked I was to find my mail from the previous year stashed away in a shoe box, and feeling stupid about complaining to the company and post office about mail apparently not being delivered." Please note that from this remark we see the man is NOT living with the wife and kids. A careless reader of the jumbled essay might assume that he is, and that the wife is leaving him at home with the kids. The writing is deliberately crafted to give that false impression. "As long as this mother lives with and cares for her children, and desires custody of them — and she does — pursuing a divorce here in Japan will apparently only lead to me losing custody of the three children I cherish so deeply. According to two reputable lawyers I have consulted"...blah blah blah... Confirmation that the man is NOT living with the woman. He introduces a claim that lawyers say he will lose custody of the children, but this is contradicted later when he says that lawyers tell him custody of the elder children (12 and 9 years old) is likely if they choose to live with him. At that point, his whole essay crumbles to the smaller point that he might not get custody of the 5 year old. Anyway, this passage is a complete deception -- a lie. "But I also feel that the responsibility that I willingly took on as a father should supersede my own individual desires." Oh, then this could not possibly be Chris Savoie! "Why doesn't my wife divorce me, you may wonder. I do too. My only guess is that she delights in being able to go out whenever she likes, because she currently has this great baby-sitter who not only doesn't charge, but also cooks for the children, cleans up after them, bathes them and gets them into bed." And who might that baby-sitter be? Certainly it is NOT you, because you would have said so, but instead you settled for implying that it is you, implying that she goes out leaving you with the kids. This is deception -- a lie. "My lawyer has also confirmed that a divorce would result in a monthly child support payment that is far less than what I currently contribute to the family. Moreover, since my wife is gainfully employed, she would not be entitled to any alimony." So, you currently contribute a few dollars, but the divorce settlement would require you to contribue nothing at all. Right? "Yes, as ludicrous as it may sound, I, the father who spends virtually all his free time with his children, would be replaced by someone who spends his free time sinking into greater and greater gambling debt." What sounds "ludicrous" to me is the deliberate vagueness of this writing. What on earth does "virtually all his free time" mean? One hour every other week? Combined with the sleight of hand above concerning the "baby-sitter", the writer clearly intends to make the careless reader feel that Daddy is spending a lot of time with the children. But a careful reading shows that the children are living with the wife, and that Daddy is only spending a few dollars and a few minutes with these children. "Mathematically, my choice to reside in Japan after marriage + her choice to have an affair and then divorce = my loss of my own children. That is, without a doubt, flawed math." I would say the mathematics are more like: you are a loser+liar+manipulator+ Savoie-like scumbag = your putrid attempt to bamboozle the public with some self-aggrandizing self-pity and shameless attacks on your wife. "I do recognize that there is a significant likelihood that I will lose my children someday." I hope it is tomorrow!
|
|
Dreamgirl
Hirakata, Japan
|
I think Chris Savoie was able to get that essay published in the Japan Times, with the help of his PR agent, the Ambassador Agency (see my post on other thread). I'd guess that it is loosely based on a situation faced by one of Chris Savoie's drivelling acquaintances. Not a business acquaintance, but someone he has met in the Hague Convention "movement" -- another guy who never bothered to take care of the children, but raises a big ruckus when the wife wants to divorce the schmuck. It's pretty clear from the essay that the author is NOT wealthy (the wife appears to be the one making the money). The wife likely paid for the house, and he wound up with joint ownership, something he can use against her while holding out and refusing to divorce. The wife is probably now living with her mother (the "no charge baby-sitter" when she goes out) and this sorry-arse loser had moved out quite some time ago. The wife unfortunately did not change all the locks to keep him out, and one day he came snooping around (finding his letters in a shoebox and love hotel items in a drawer). These are people who will cause great harm to any impetus for reform of laws in Japan, while admittedly making fools of themselves and giving everyone a laugh. I dare this guy to reveal his identity! Let us hear the wife's side of the story!
|
|
Buster
Ellenboro, NC
|
Stay home and mind your business and you will not end up in a positon like that! Do not wander into a damn place you have no real business!
|
|
Joan
Franklin, TN
|
Judged:
2
1
TNMtMan, welcome back! Nice to read your posts again. I try so hard to stay away from this forum... and fail. However, I am at lost with the turn of events. The original purpose of this forum was to side up with either Savoie or Noriko, and perhaps discuss the cultural differences between our countries (at least, it was my intent). Now, it has become a war! And please, if I see one peanut, or clueless icon on my post, I am going to scream... As far as I am concerned, this issue is about a man and a woman, not about countries. If it is true Savoie is doing this, then I really feel sorry for him. Life is about growth, not destruction.
|
|
Dreamgirl
Hirakata, Japan
|
Judged:
1
1
Joan wrote: As far as I am concerned, this issue is about a man and a woman, not about countries. If it is true Savoie is doing this, then I really feel sorry for him. Life is about growth, not destruction. Excellent point! Chris Savoie thinks that he can take his personal issues onto the international stage, with the help of a PR agency. Yes, there are those who have no sympathetic regard for Chris Savoie, but believe they can use his fabrications for their own political agenda. My own opinion is that he will fail in this, for several reasons. Primarily, I think his own personal life is so unstable that before long it will fall apart in the public view. That is one reason why the effort is now indirect -- providing seemingly similar stories that allude to Savoie, but not telling the public that Savoie is behind them. However, when Chris Savoie's life with homewrecker Amy falls apart, no one will even want to allude to his disgusting circumstances.
|
|
the phantom menace
Bucharest, Romania
|
Joan wrote: TNMtMan, welcome back! Nice to read your posts again. I try so hard to stay away from this forum... and fail. However, I am at lost with the turn of events. The original purpose of this forum was to side up with either Savoie or Noriko, and perhaps discuss the cultural differences between our countries (at least, it was my intent). Now, it has become a war! And please, if I see one peanut, or clueless icon on my post, I am going to scream... As far as I am concerned, this issue is about a man and a woman, not about countries. If it is true Savoie is doing this, then I really feel sorry for him. Life is about growth, not destruction. You should think freely!!!1!1!! Why care about "nuts" and "bulbs"? the judgment is biased anyways. My intent was to uncover the lies and reveal the true picture. You have to place this story in a social and cultural context to understand it properly. I take side with anybody and anything that doesn't get fair treatment. People should have been focusing their discussion on the kids' future instead on their parents, but then again you won't have any friends if you don't take sides :) Anyways, it's your choice, but don't forget real life is serious business :) If you lose your kids like that, you'll never take side with Noriko. If you grew up without seeing your parent or parents, I doubt you'll agree with Dreamgirl or David Lee. Apropos, I'm not Savoie or paid by them, be smart enough and don't imagine things thinking it must be true, like some people did. There were also others that posted (Kindergarten teacher, for example) and I don't know them. Some people like to flame and target me just because I don't agree with them and besides that it's fun to sign my comments with different names :)
|
|
married in Japan
Japan
|
Judged:
2
2
the phantom menace wrote: People should have been focusing their discussion on the kids' future instead on their parents Interesting that you take the KIDS side here and in the next couple sentences you say: the phantom menace wrote: If you lose your kids like that, you'll never take side with Noriko. ... you focus on what the PARENT wants (which is not always best for the child). While it is usually the case that the child is best off with two lovely and capable parents, sometimes a good parent knows that the best situation for a child is for them to be without themselves. The problem is, most lousy parents are egotistical and/or narcissistic enough to believe that their presence is the best possible thing for the child no matter what.
|
|
sebadaba
Atlanta, GA
|
Judged:
1
the phantom menace wrote: <quoted text> Anyways, it's your choice, but don't forget real life is serious business :) If you lose your kids like that, you'll never take side with Noriko. If you grew up without seeing your parent or parents, I doubt you'll agree with Dreamgirl or David Lee. Apropos, I'm not Savoie or paid by them, be smart enough and don't imagine things thinking it must be true, like some people did. As for Savoie, he had hardly been with his children last seven years by his choice. They had been growing up without seeing their dad already.
|
|
Joan
Franklin, TN
|
Judged:
1
the phantom menace wrote: <quoted text> You should think freely!!!1!1!! Why care about "nuts" and "bulbs"? the judgment is biased anyways. My intent was to uncover the lies and reveal the true picture. You have to place this story in a social and cultural context to understand it properly. I take side with anybody and anything that doesn't get fair treatment. People should have been focusing their discussion on the kids' future instead on their parents, but then again you won't have any friends if you don't take sides :) Anyways, it's your choice, but don't forget real life is serious business :) If you lose your kids like that, you'll never take side with Noriko. If you grew up without seeing your parent or parents, I doubt you'll agree with Dreamgirl or David Lee. Apropos, I'm not Savoie or paid by them, be smart enough and don't imagine things thinking it must be true, like some people did. There were also others that posted (Kindergarten teacher, for example) and I don't know them. Some people like to flame and target me just because I don't agree with them and besides that it's fun to sign my comments with different names :) I don't agree this issue should be taken on the social/cultural context. When Chris and Noriko fell in love, decided to marry and have children, it does not appears cultural differences was an issue. They probably did not even think about it, because to them, it was a normal situation, and they adapted to one another. I’d like to think they discussed their dreams and expectations, because, frankly, once the initial infatuation wears off, marriage becomes a form of arrangement. It is say that in Japan she was a stay-at-home mom, and he was a successful business man. They had to have agreed on these roles! When they moved to California, and returned to Japan, it is obvious the INTENT was to live in Japan. At the time, they were probably still in love, and returned to Japan, perhaps (?), because Noriko was not happy. Why bringing her back to the US? I am assuming love was dead at this point, and someone was changing the rules. I fail to see social or cultural issues in this turn of events either, just broken hearts and broken promises. When I read posts about Japanese men, I laugh. Men in America are just the same. Going for beers after work, going to "gentlemen" clubs, watching football all week-end long, going golfing, having affairs, etc... It is all the same. I don't see too much of a cultural difference there.(The intent of my comments is not to put men down, but to prove a point). For that matter, women are not that different either, from culture to culture.
|
|
Joan
Franklin, TN
|
the phantom menace wrote: <quoted text> You should think freely!!!1!1!! Why care about "nuts" and "bulbs" That was meant as a joke in an attempt to lighten the cyber atmosphere of this forum.
|
|
sebadaba
Atlanta, GA
|
Judged:
1
Folks, tomorrow both of Savoies will be on Today show. We'll find out whether they have anything new to say other than what they have posted using many stupid IDs in some threads here.
|
|
sebadaba
Atlanta, GA
|
Judged:
4
I just hope Doctor Amy will keep her mouth shut. Hopefully she doesn't use " my children love Issac and Rebecca " card again. It does stink as well as " the children miss TN home" card. I will be disappointed if NBC doesn't ask anything about his Japanese citizenship or his marital status in Japan.
|
|
|