help topix friends

Since: Oct 11

Glenview Nas, IL

#1 Dec 7, 2012
I'm in I've been seeing this guy for a couple months and he treats me like a queen, altho last night he confessed he has had a sexual encounter with a man a few years ago. When he was telling me I acted cool about it hoping he would tell me the whole truth. I think he is still open to being with men. I kinda pretended I was openminded about it just to see if his encounter was out of his system. Its not. He still has desire for men. He gets very turned on when were together and I've never been treated so wonderful. What should I do..he also isn't as masculine of a man that I'm use to but I was willing to let that slide until now...now he just seems gay. I have other gay friends but not someone I consider a lover. What should I do. This sucks and I need your advise..thank you guys

Since: Aug 12

Murray, KY

#2 Dec 7, 2012
That's no good. I know a couple that was in a similar situation. They decided to stay together. They are now married and have been for more than a decade. They love each other very much, but their sex life is nonexistent. They are two of the kindest people I've ever met, but he has lost his sex drive with her entirely. While he would never admit it he does resent her on some level, and m sure she has similar feelings. They are both wonderful people, and they deserve to be happy, but he chose to pretend he was someone that he wasn't and now another's feelings are wrapped up on it.
Every situation is different, and this may not be the case for you, but be careful. You can talk your mind into thinking a lot of things, but you can't control where your hormones push you.
Love me some Man

Murray, KY

#4 Dec 7, 2012
Let him know I love to suck and lick and rim!

Since: Oct 09

Location hidden

#5 Dec 7, 2012
yikkers wrote:
It won't work honey. He will always have thoughts of being with a man.
Yeah, and if you date some other straight man, they will only have thoughts about being with you, and you alone.
yikkers wrote:
And that's just sick, he will sneak behind your back and do whatever he has to do.
A totally straight man would never, never sneak behind your back. Unlike "teh gays", straight men are completely monogamous, it is like they imprint on whomever they are currently having sex with and can only think of having sex with them.
yikkers wrote:
So if you can handle that then make things work, but if you don't want AIDS or another STD I would let it go.
Yes, straight men are incapable of catching AIDS or STDs and passing them along to you, so if you fear disease and there is a possibility that guy is bisexual then your best bet is to find a "more straight" person, because they are immune to catching AIDS and STDs.

We can just hope your next man keeps all his sexual desires and kinks to himself so that you never know of them. Sex is best when there is no trust or communication between partners about sex, who should always be on guard against being rightfully judged as "sick" when ever their tastes or desires deviate from the "norm", whatever that is.

Obviously, your best course of action is to make him feel ashamed of himself. If he is not borderline suicidal by the time you are done with him, then you aren't doing it right. Yikkers can probably give you some more advice about that.
By tch

Murray, KY

#6 Dec 7, 2012
Anonymous Keyboard Tapper wrote:
<quoted text>
Yeah, and if you date some other straight man, they will only have thoughts about being with you, and you alone.
<quoted text>
A totally straight man would never, never sneak behind your back. Unlike "teh gays", straight men are completely monogamous, it is like they imprint on whomever they are currently having sex with and can only think of having sex with them.
<quoted text>
Yes, straight men are incapable of catching AIDS or STDs and passing them along to you, so if you fear disease and there is a possibility that guy is bisexual then your best bet is to find a "more straight" person, because they are immune to catching AIDS and STDs.
We can just hope your next man keeps all his sexual desires and kinks to himself so that you never know of them. Sex is best when there is no trust or communication between partners about sex, who should always be on guard against being rightfully judged as "sick" when ever their tastes or desires deviate from the "norm", whatever that is.
Obviously, your best course of action is to make him feel ashamed of himself. If he is not borderline suicidal by the time you are done with him, then you aren't doing it right. Yikkers can probably give you some more advice about that.
Spell/Grammar check. That's all I got for you today.
Laura

United States

#7 Dec 7, 2012
Maybe he's bi.
Scott Wallace

Owensboro, KY

#10 Dec 8, 2012
My old uncle Reavis used to say if he's bi it means he likes men and boys gay is gay no way to make it sound like less of a sin

Since: Oct 11

Tinley Park, IL

#11 Dec 8, 2012
I'm not gonna be able to get past this. When all along I seen him as sensitive now all I see is gay..I never dreamed I would be dealing with this. You are all right. He will continue to desire men and I can't compete with that. Any other woman I can hold my own but not with other men. Now I have to tell him I'm done....thank you all for ur insight..
Anon

New Albany, IN

#12 Dec 8, 2012
If this thread were about a guy's girlfriend wanting to have sex with other women as well as men, this thread would be totally different. Hypocrisy anyone?

Since: Aug 12

Murray, KY

#13 Dec 8, 2012
Anon wrote:
If this thread were about a guy's girlfriend wanting to have sex with other women as well as men, this thread would be totally different. Hypocrisy anyone?
Whether you want to believe it or not, there is a difference in the sexes and their ability to "jump sides". It may not be pc, but it just is easier for girls to be attracted to both. The female body is just a more pleasant thing. Guys are gross.......we just are, and I think it's a miracle that the human race has been able to procreate to this point. I have seen plenty of straight females make out or fool around with other females. I also like to think I am a pretty open person, but at no time have I wanted to,or even think I could without being totally repulsed, make out with a man. I'm not homophobic, guys are just nasty. Myself included. All I'm saying is........if a woman messes around with another woman, she is far more likely to be attracted to men than themthermway around. You can say its sexist, or politically incorrect all you want, but it doesn't make it any less true.
harry

Dallas, TX

#14 Dec 8, 2012
im confused.
Bull

South Fulton, TN

#16 Dec 9, 2012
A queer by any other name is still a queer. Gay,my ass.

Since: Oct 11

United States

#17 Dec 9, 2012
I haven't told him yet that what he shared with me has turned me around 360..he is a wonderful person but I truly don't think its out of his system to explore that desire. He said it was just once and about 5 yrs ago. But it has changed everything for me. Not to mention I have a 14 yr old son..would he??..could he?? ever cross the line where my sons concerned...omg I just don't see how I could take that risk..and to think just 4 days ago I was thinking he could be the one I've waited for.
hurting

Des Moines, IA

#18 Dec 9, 2012
take it from someone who has dealt with the same issue, ive been with my husband for 20 years and I have seen on the internet where he has had unthinkable discussions with men and it repulsed me to no end that he did that to me....honey of you get him out of your system I would do it...because if he has already told you this, he will never be fully be commited to you...sorry this is hurting you but I know what you are going through

Since: Aug 12

Murray, KY

#19 Dec 10, 2012
Please don't confuse being gay with being amoral. Just because he may be attracted to men doesn't mean he would mess with your son no more than any man who would be attracted to you might mess with a teenage daughter. If he really is a good person, like you say, he wouldn't dream of doing such a thing.

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