What happened to RObert MAyer?

Since: Jul 14

Linz, Austria

#1555 Jul 28, 2014
Astoria wrote:
<quoted text>

Rob's mother, sister, and brother have done absolutely nothing for her or their family... Rob himself hated his family...
I feel you Astoria. It is very difficult to protect a scum bag such as Ida. And to do so it is clear that one has to lie.
If Rob hated his family, why was his sister the first person contacted by Ida after Rob was late less than two hours?
Was it because his sister's husband is LE so she wanted to have a proof that she was concerned?
Sam bee

Levittown, NY

#1556 Jul 28, 2014
People feel it matters that she has that big house and doesn't work and it is documented that she is a thief who stole from other people that doesn't make her.a person people have sympathy for and cluck cluck all u want, relative of Ida. , but it is also clear that she is a liar who changed her story, the facts she presented of phone calls, her whereabouts, her theories of what happened and her demeanor that make people very suspicious of her. She was so scared of the alleged peeps that she remained in that house with her kids she was such a wonderful mom she booked a trip with her kids with her drug using husband who she said was edgy and nervous the week she was doing it and was willing to risk him being caught with drugs with the kids there in another country. Great mom. And she now says rob hated his family but called his sister first and stated that his family was coming for fathers day. I think she's full of it and so are her big defenders. I bet it takes. While and then she's arrested for murder. Maybe if those kids don't have to live in that dishonest, druggy atmosphere anymore, they will have a shot at normalcy
mjak

Old Bridge, NJ

#1557 Jul 29, 2014
I have been a supporter and advocate for the missing for well over 20 years. I find the idea of living with not knowing where your love one is horrifying. The idea of a missing person out their alone, injured or dead makes me shudder. No one should have to experience any of this. Thus, I became involved with the plight of the missing. I have two skills, writing and art which I gladly lend to the cause. My desire is to do something positive and constructive. So I ask myself how is participating in this thread any of those things? I became involved in this case early on. I made a poster showing support for Ida and her family, I organized an online support movement. I was asked to be an admin on Idaís sight but declined because I was becoming uncomfortable with Idaís behavior. I perceived her participation on the facebook page was more about Idaís own persona, and finding Rob seemed to take a back seat. This was something I had never seen with any other missing family and it disturbed me. I had no idea then if my perceptions were correct or not . I just decided to disassociate from her page. months later I would come to learn about all the lies and misinformation. I put the link on here to Tomís page because I feel Robís family have been unfairly treated by Ida. Ida created a percepetion of a family that Rob did not like and where not helping to find Rob. I have come to find out that is not true. Ida Mayer came to the public in what we all believed was good faith to help her with her plight. While I was not happy to learn of Idaís past I donít believe oneís past defines who they are today. I would never use her past as a reason to discount her plight. What I do take issue is, is that she came to us on a platform of falsehoods and inaccuracies. It is not possible for me to believe and support a person who would be dishonest when asking for peopleís help. Furthermore, she maligned a family who I know now was very much searching for their love one and I guess did not care about their pain. I pray for Ida that she finds the strength to do the right things, what ever that maybe. I pray for Rob that he is safe somewhere. I pray for his family that they find the answers and peace they so need and most of all I pray for two children who are living something no child should ever have to face. When people here show support for Ida by ripping into Robís family or anyone who voices concerns about Ida, they do a disservice to the person who matters the most , Rob. Robert Mayer is missing and he is the one we need to be advocating for. If in doing that we become blinded by an allegiance then we lose perspective and our efforts lose their constructiveness.
Sam bee

Levittown, NY

#1558 Jul 29, 2014
MJAK, while understand your concerns about the lies and misinformation from Ida, I do not get how you don't understand those things and her behavior on many levels is what is causing her to be maligned Also , to me rob mayors plight is important if he was actually harmed, by het or other parties , abducted, held captive etc etc however if he left on his own and is out there somewhere living his life , alone or perhaps with anothe woman , then he is no deserving of anyone's sympathy. Then he is another piece of crap dead bet dad who tired of hi wife and responsibilities and just took off. She has resources. Apparently. Why wouldn't she get a really competent private detective agency to find him for her so she can get child support??? Or find the place the Russian mob is holding him?? The reason her past is relevant is it shows a lack of honesty, integrity, and a willingness to do wrong for greed. And sh has shown she still has at least the dishonesty. One more thing, this is a TOPIX forum where people can comment on things. It's not particularly a missing persons forum , so. People post. What they think took place. Said it before and will say it again Ida Mayer should've shut her big mouth with all the bs and no on would been scrutinizing her life last or present. She caused th maligning with all the bull and her children can thank her for that I still think she going to be arrested eventually we will see sometimes these cases take years to get to the arrest
Sam bee

Levittown, NY

#1559 Jul 29, 2014
Why are we supposed to be advocating for Robert Mayer if you think he left on his own because he wanted to please explain that
mjak

Old Bridge, NJ

#1560 Jul 29, 2014
Sam bee wrote:
Why are we supposed to be advocating for Robert Mayer if you think he left on his own because he wanted to please explain that
Because Robert Mayer is a missing person and until his wearabouts are known he is considered endangered and human decency dictates we show concern and draw attention to his plight..Untill we learn otherwise Rob Mayer is an endangered person and it serves no purpose to conjecture on his character. It is always a possiblity that he left on his own with a girlfriend, or whatever but we can't do a character assasination on a person who is missing. That serves no purpose.
Lisa

Hampton Bays, NY

#1561 Jul 29, 2014
Wow mjak! One of the best posts I've read on here. I admire all you do for the missing community and have even more respect for your honesty and following your gut when it comes to this case...... All you have written is exactly my feelings as well.
I became involved in this because it's a town away from me and felt terribly for this family , but as time has gone on and truths were revealed my sympathy turned to disgust with her.
I too hope he is found alive and well ( like everyone ) but I hate thinking about all the wonderful people who are being taken advantage of and played so to speak ! People like yourself should be placing your time and efforts on a family who will do whatever it takes to get their loved one back, not someone who manipulates and so on!(Don't mean ribs family at all).... Hope a mp case like this doesn't discourage you from using your talents and your kind heart in helping others!!( not that it seems it would)

Since: May 14

Morristown, NJ

#1562 Jul 30, 2014
Beautifully stated! Mjak, thank you, dear friend. You always stand steady for what you believe in.
Charlotte

Ossining, NY

#1563 Jul 30, 2014
mjak wrote:
<quoted text>
Because Robert Mayer is a missing person and until his wearabouts are known he is considered endangered and human decency dictates we show concern and draw attention to his plight..Untill we learn otherwise Rob Mayer is an endangered person and it serves no purpose to conjecture on his character. It is always a possiblity that he left on his own with a girlfriend, or whatever but we can't do a character assasination on a person who is missing. That serves no purpose.
We don't really know that he's endangered. Do we? I don't.
All I know is what came out of Ida's mouth. That includes all her lies.

For all I know, maybe Rob's happy somewhere.

Maybe he took off and told her so. Who am I to judge?
People break up all the time.

Mjay and Sambee, can you please check your spelling before you write?
I don't mean to sound petty, but your typos take away from your messages.
Dan

Newark, NJ

#1564 Jul 30, 2014
How many addicts have you heard/read about who left their families, disappeared and are "living the life" with a new mate, on a beach, sipping cocktails?

IF (big if) Robert Mayer took off on his own, he is STILL in danger due to his substance issue and the gun missing from the home.

Since: May 14

Morristown, NJ

#1565 Jul 30, 2014
So true, Dan. Rob was listed as endangered missing from the start, and it was probably due to him having had a substance abuse problem. As time passes, and more and more comes to light, the more I fear Rob is not with us. My place is not to judge but to help find Rob. He is a victim unless or until it is shown to be otherwise. He is not here to defend himself. And, regardless, Rob's family and loved ones are suffering either way and have been for way too long.
Lisa

Hampton Bays, NY

#1566 Jul 30, 2014
It's interesting that the 2 things that make him endangered missing and quite possibly still in danger were never mentioned by his wife. And still Haven't been brought up by anyone on the fb page. Jeanne ( with all due respect ) you are an active member of that page, you don't see anything wrong with that ? I'm sorry that is misleading people
Sam bee

Levittown, NY

#1567 Jul 30, 2014
If someone who is an adult endangers themselves, by their bad choices , I don't have too much sympathy for them it appears that this man was functioning enough to go to work and do electrical work to boot , every day. Therefore , if it s a fact, as so many of you believe , that he left on his own, and ditched his kids with no contact for over a year , then I just think he's another deadbeat dad and no deserving of the concern of strangers. He is then one of many who have done the same. And Dan, I never said he was on a tropical isle sipping a drink, but when you have a drug abuser as a spouse you do a lot f nagging and bitching about that. And though the wife may be right to do it, a drug user doesn't want to be controlled or told what to do and it's easy to find a companion who is into the same things he is. I myself still think she disposed of him. I find t a bit difficult to understand posts who hope rob is happy and healthy , living his life if that's the case after what he did to his kids. And again maybe there has been contact. All info comes from Ida, a proven liar!
Lisa

Hampton Bays, NY

#1568 Jul 30, 2014
Lisa wrote:
It's interesting that the 2 things that make him endangered missing and quite possibly still in danger were never mentioned by his wife. And still Haven't been brought up by anyone on the fb page. Jeanne ( with all due respect ) you are an active member of that page, you don't see anything wrong with that ? I'm sorry that is misleading people
Jeanne this is no way meant towards you!! I think your work is commendable. I really wanted to know your thoughts
Sam bee

Levittown, NY

#1569 Jul 30, 2014
Charlotte , I agree with you!!! Who says he is endangered? Ida? With the bs about the Russian mob? If she said she thought maybe someone was retaliating against them for stealing their savings and ruining lives I might have bought the story. She never mentioned the drug use though it's now reported that it's been a long time problem to me if he was murdered or abducted and held somewhere, he is a victim. But if he left on his own to live his life elsewhere then that is no victim in my book. If he wanted out get a divorce or at least explain to your kids that u are leaving. If he is out there somewhere living his life ,I hope he's as miserable as can be. After doing that to his kids. And if she killed him or had someone kill him which us what I believe , I hope law enforcement catches her real soon maybe her followers can release balloons on the anniversary of her arrest

Since: May 14

Morristown, NJ

#1570 Jul 30, 2014
No offense taken, Lisa:). My intent is not and never has been to give anyone the wrong idea. I want to keep up with what is on all pages involving Rob's case, even if I see things differently, do not agree with how a page is done, and have strong reservations about a number of things. Mjak echoed my sentiments exactly. I could not have said it better than her. Mjak and I have been friends for a long time, and we work well together for the same causes in many cases.

Just because I am a member of Rob's original page doesn't mean I agree with all that is on it and all that has or has not been said.
Mjak

Old Bridge, NJ

#1571 Jul 30, 2014
Lisa wrote:
It's interesting that the 2 things that make him endangered missing and quite possibly still in danger were never mentioned by his wife. And still Haven't been brought up by anyone on the fb page. Jeanne ( with all due respect ) you are an active member of that page, you don't see anything wrong with that ? I'm sorry that is misleading people
Excellent statement about the two things that make Robert Mayer so endangered were not brought up by his wife. I probably am still a member of ida's page, as I don't think I ever un-joined the group. Actually never thought to do that. Facebook is the kind of place where things like unjoining are not done a lot of time.
Lisa

Hampton Bays, NY

#1572 Jul 30, 2014
Given both mjak and Jeanne have experience , do you guys feel there is something else that could be done to get the story out?
In your experience, are things such as vigils or searches considered helpful at this point?
Given the pages seem to have very different stories, is there maybe a way to get word of the "open" page to people following this case so that the story and flier could be spread further?

Since: May 14

Morristown, NJ

#1573 Jul 30, 2014
Lisa, thank you for your post. I cannot answer for the victims' family members personally, although I was missing a family member who was found after 25 years. I am not Ida, Rob and Ida's children, Tom, Christine, Rob's mom, or his close friends and other members of his family.

From searches I have been involved with, vigils set the tone for and encourage compassion, hope, strength, memorializing, praying. They help people come together in time of need when a loved one goes missing or has been found deceased. One year memorials are not uncommon. But, vigils and memorials do not take the place of actual searching, if there is searching left to be done, be it a search for the missing or a search for justice.

I can give you an example of searching and not giving up. When I was 12, a family member, just 13 at the time, researched at several libraries to find every possible phone book in the nation, pre-internet, and somehow located the phone number and convinced many people to deliver stacks and stacks, three feet high, of phone books to search for our family member. We didn't find him then. But we never gave up, and 13 years later we did find him, alive and okay. I thank God for that day. But, those 25 years were long and painful. Roxanne Paltauf's family is still active in searching for their beloved Roxanne. Sherry, a good friend of mine, is still searching for the murderer(s) of her Dad and stepmom, Terry and Darleen Anderson. It has been years for them.

I was involved in K-9 search and rescue for many years. The answer to the search question is, there must first be a place to search, and the most appropriate search methods need to be determined, if a potential search area is actually known. There are many types of searches, even within K-9 SAR. And, sometimes a dog is not what is called for.

Regarding Rob's case I might base most of the places searched on the place last seen and the victimology, for example, who did Rob get his drugs from, when did he last buy, does he owe anyone money? Did his behavior resulting from his addiction lead to him having enemies, including people he may know? I would also look at his habits. For example, he liked his creature comforts and took several showers a day sometimes. Chances are then he wouldn't be roughing it in the woods, at least for long. He was also not internet savvy and had no online footprint. Chances are he will not have much of a personally made footprint now. Victimology is very important, and is analogous to a patient being honest with a doctor. No matter how embarrassing or painful, a patient needs to be honest in order to be truly helped.

"The Doe Network" is not big like it used to be. It truly helped match up the unidentified with the missing; albeit, it never became all-inclusive. I have longed for one well done, all-inclusive, site to be developed where one could search for anyone in the United States for the missing, and where info for a missing person can be input into a data base to brought up by anyone in the nation. NamUs is great; but, it is not all inclusive. Hopefully, one day it will be. In any case, I think it may be beneficial to contact state agencies, especially up and down the east coast, and search for any unidentified deceased persons in their databases and to input Rob's information into all missing persons databases as detailed and factual as possible. Rob is in some, but not in all.

I believe strongly in the facts page. Perhaps people can copy and paste Rob's flier, the facts and personal traits page, and your own words everywhere you can to spread the word that Rob is missing. There is a tribute video on Rob's original page that would be good to share, although we know more now then we did then, so it is not fully accurate.
Sam bee

Levittown, NY

#1574 Jul 30, 2014
So Jeanne 777 let me understand this. You found your missing family member after 25 hrs of no contact. That put your family in he'll and found he was alive and ok and living his life without all of you because he wanted to??? What a guy!! Maybe I am not as nice as you but if , say my sister did that to us I would be enraged!!! It's one thi g if they Find a body or find they've been held captive , but living their little old life.? While the family suffers??? I'd have a middle finger to show that person and then spend the next 25 yrs without them. I think this guy us dead and that the wife had something to do with it. But if he changed his name and took off on his own to live his life , drugs or not then I say screw him and the horse he rode in on. I can see why he might want to dump Ida, but who does that to his kids and mother. And maybe, just maybe he and Ida cooked up a plan it's been suggested before on this forum and it seems greed was a big factor in that union. And that he was somehow complicity in her illegal schemes before

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