joshua parker
Madi

Cape Coral, FL

#1001 Feb 11, 2014
Oh, and the detective's e-mail address (also mentioned in news stories from authoritative news outlets like http://www.kptv.com/story/19624814/youth-bask... ) has a Portland .gov address. I know you need to show lots of documentation to get certain TLDs like .gov, so it would be rather difficult (but not impossible) to set up a phony .gov site and corresponding email.

Hope that helps.:-)

Since: Jan 14

Location hidden

#1002 Feb 11, 2014
I was looking through some old emails and here is a direct quote from Kate about Hannah. I don't remember if it was a Facebook comment from Kate or a Caringbridge comment she made or what. I had copied it and sent it to a friend who also followed Kate, so that's why I had it.

"I am not keeping a child who rejects me & her older siblings, even if the reason she's doing it is because she is so broken from her own abuse and neglect that she can't allow herself to trust anyone else. I'm sorry for Hannah. I am. But this is not a challenge I'm "up" for. So if she gets officially diagnosed with RAD, then I will find a new family for her. I am sure there is a family out there who would be able to love Hannah despite her rejection of them & would have the financial means to get therapy for her at the level she needs. There is probably a couple whose marriage isn't hanging on by a thread who would be happy to take on Hannah & her challenges. She isn't irredeemable... I don't want to give the impression that I think she is, because I don't. I just feel like my life is so NOT at a place where I can be a decent parent to her, nor do I have any desire at this point to try."

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1003 Feb 11, 2014
Wow!! Then why adopt in the first place??? So sad :(
Nosepicker 14 wrote:
I was looking through some old emails and here is a direct quote from Kate about Hannah. I don't remember if it was a Facebook comment from Kate or a Caringbridge comment she made or what. I had copied it and sent it to a friend who also followed Kate, so that's why I had it.
"I am not keeping a child who rejects me & her older siblings, even if the reason she's doing it is because she is so broken from her own abuse and neglect that she can't allow herself to trust anyone else. I'm sorry for Hannah. I am. But this is not a challenge I'm "up" for. So if she gets officially diagnosed with RAD, then I will find a new family for her. I am sure there is a family out there who would be able to love Hannah despite her rejection of them & would have the financial means to get therapy for her at the level she needs. There is probably a couple whose marriage isn't hanging on by a thread who would be happy to take on Hannah & her challenges. She isn't irredeemable... I don't want to give the impression that I think she is, because I don't. I just feel like my life is so NOT at a place where I can be a decent parent to her, nor do I have any desire at this point to try."
remembering

Boise, ID

#1004 Feb 11, 2014
After reading through the more recent posts yesterday, I was ruminating on my history with Kate. One thing that stuck in my mind was her pregnancy with Joshua. She claimed to have a blood compatibility issue that led to very frequent u/s, in which they missed Joshua's spina bifida, so it was a surprise when he was born and carelifted to portland. To which she made the comments that she felt something was wrong during the pregnancy and that it was SB. She commented this before he was born. What I realised was... the u/s most likely DID detect the SB and that's what the subsequent ones were about and therefore it was not a surprise and etc with the drama that ensued.

I'm not sure why I'm sharing this with you all. I'm certain my husband does not wish to hear me talk about Kate any further and you all at least read the posts. lol
remembering

Boise, ID

#1005 Feb 11, 2014
wth is the deal with topix listing of the towns you're posting from? and, why would it chose that location for me? how odd. anyway...

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1006 Feb 11, 2014
Classic Kate!

• momto3g3b


• offline
• Joined: 4/2004
• Posts: 301
• Location: just this side of crazy
The problems facing my baby stem from an antibody-c/antigen-c reaction (maternal-fetal blood incompatibility).

Briefly put, the baby has antigen-c in his blood and my body has antibody-c from previous exposure to antigen-c (most likely during my first c-section with my twins), so my body's immune system recognizes the baby as foreign and the antibodies in my blood are continually destroying the baby's red blood cells (which contain the antigen-c). This causes anemia, which can lead to brain damage (from oxygen deprivation), in-utero jaundice (from excess bilirubin from the breakdown of destroyed red blood cells) which can also cause brain damage. Other complications that can occur are swelling of the liver, heart, kidneys, hydrocephalus in the brain, fetal hydrops (heart failure), stillbirth or death soon after birth from kernicterus (excess bilirubin that gets lodged in the brain). Long-term complications can include speech problems, motor problems and behaviors similar to autism. The only treatment is blood transfusions in-utero, where blood is injected into the umbilical artery, but the risks are substantial, so it's something that isn't done until the anemia level reaches a severe level.

This is similar to the blood incompatibility between Rh negative moms and Rh positive babies, but the difference is that there is no prevention in the form of RhoGAM. 98% of blood incompatibility deals with Rh, and of the remaining 2% of blood incompatibilities, only 6% involves antigen-c. So....it's a relatively rare situation and one I'd rather not be dealing with. And that is why this will be my last baby. The reaction of my body against a baby will get worse with each pregnancy (because my level of antibodies increases with each pregnancy) and I'm unwilling to go through this again. The perinatologist believes I got my first exposure to antigen-c during my c-section with my twins. My next pregnancy resulted in my son being born with jaundice, mild anemia, hypotonia and some breathing difficulties. It was ascertained that he had antigen-c in his blood and I had antibody-c, but no one bothered to tell me or my husband about it. Had we known, we wouldn't have gotten pregnant again. Anyhow, this baby is my 2nd pregnancy post-exposure, which is why we're seeing more of a reaction.

At birth, we're looking at the baby probably needing to have serial blood transfusions where they take a bit of his blood out and then put some fresh blood in and they do it over and over and over until enough of the antibodies that are in his blood have been removed. They have to remove the antibodies that are circulating because otherwise he will continue to have blood cells destroyed and the anemia can continue to worsen, even after birth. He'll probably also have to spend time getting bili-lights from both beneath his body and above, at the same time, because time will be of the essence in getting his bilirubin level lowered.

There's more to it, but that's the gist. It's enough to make me feel , that's for sure.

The 2-vessel cord is most likely just an incidental thing. While it occurs in only 1% of pregnancies and *can* be associated with chromosome abnormalities, everything looks perfect with the baby and nothing points to a genetic problem. Sometimes a 2-vessel cord causes IUGR and can sometimes lead to heart decelerations during labor/delivery, but a lot of times it's just something that happens and doesn't cause any trouble at all (which is what it's looking like for my little guy, thankfully).

I hope that answers your questions. If not, just let me know what else you'd like explained.
8/18/05 at 10:19pm

Since: Nov 11

Location hidden

#1007 Feb 11, 2014
remembering wrote:
wth is the deal with topix listing of the towns you're posting from? and, why would it chose that location for me? how odd. anyway...
It picks a location based on your ISP. Some ISPs route your service through different areas so that's probably why you're seeing an odd location instead of your real one

If you don't want any location to show up you can register and adjust your settings so no location is displayed.

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1008 Feb 11, 2014
momto3g3b

offline
Joined: 4/2004
Posts: 301
Location: just this side of crazy
When I went to my ob appointment last Monday, my doctor did a quick u/s to check the babies' heartbeats. We were both shocked to see only one baby instead of two. "Vanishing twin syndrome" was what the doctor called it and I know it's very common, but it was still a shock.

The remaining baby looked good and I've had no problems aside from ongoing nausea, so there's every reason to believe the pregnancy will be fine. My dh and I are focusing on the baby we still have instead of the one we've lost, but it's still a sad time for us.

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1009 Feb 11, 2014
THREAD STARTER
momto3g3b
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Posts: 301
Location: just this side of crazy
You ever get so much information that you don't even know where to begin when trying to process it all? That's where I'm at. So please forgive me if this sounds disjointed.
The good news first: my little guy is measuring BIG. He's a full 2 weeks ahead of the average 26-week old. His estimated weight is 2lb,6oz (average is 1lb,12oz). The peri said that if this is an indication of how the 2-vessel cord is restricting the baby's growth, then maybe we're lucky he's got it,'cuz otherwise he'd be a 12-pounder at birth.(grin)
They did a full heart evaluation because 2-vessel cords can sometimes indicate cardiac problems and everything looked great. No problems whatsoever. So yippee for that! All of his other organs looked good today, too. No signs of swelling or anything like that.
Now for the not-so-good news: the baby's anemia level is now in the moderate range. The upper-moderate range, to be precise. That means that I have to see the peri more often and that my little guy is now experiencing oxygen deprivation, though no one can know right now to what degree and whether it will have a long-term effect on him. It also means that if things slide over into the severe range, Charley and I have to make a decision regarding whether we want to do in-utero transfusions or deliver early. Both options have risks. The transfusion carries a 6% chance of killing the baby then & there due to shock, plus there's all sorts of associated risks like triggering labor (and subsequent delivery), infection, harming the baby ('cuz they'd have to sedate him by a direct injection ~ the thought of which makes me feel ill. I can't imagine giving a baby a shot in-utero; it seems cruel), and lots of other things that I can't remember because my head is swimming with information. And early delivery obviously has risks ~ death, ROP (retinopathy of prematurity, which can cause blindness), infections, etc...I know I should remember everything I was told, but I can't right now. Anyone who's had a very premature baby knows all the risks I'm thinking of, though.
I also have an excess of amniotic fluid. I suspected as much because I had the same situation with Adam and this baby moves very much like he did ~ kind of all over the place really quickly, like he's floating *really* freely. Anyhow, it's not a big deal, but I figured I'm mention it just because it was one more thing we learned about at today's appointment. It does explain my sudden growth, though.
What else? I feel like I'm forgetting something, but I can't remember what it is. Oh well. If I remember later, I'll come back and post about it.
Charley and I have lots of talking to do, as well as researching the possible options. We were told that if a future appointment shows another large increase in anemia level like today's did, then we'll have to make decisions right away, so we are going to research all the possible complications of prematurity. Right now, without knowing FACTS, we are leaning toward delivering early versus doing transfusions if we have to make that choice. Of course, we're really hoping that the anemia doesn't get severe. I didn't ask what the chances are of it NOT happening...wish now I'd thought to ask that....sigh...

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1010 Feb 11, 2014
Continued from last comment....
This is really, really, really depressing/stressful/overwhelm ing to me. I'm still hoping that we'll get a miracle and he'll be born a healthy, term baby. Even if he needs blood transfusions and bili-lights and other interventions at birth, that's better than him having all of the complications of severe anemia coupled with prematurity. Oh, and of course there's the 20% chance of stillbirth that was brought up today. That was a lousy thing to hear about and contemplate. I had read online about that possibility, but having the peri bring it up in discussion was really horrid.
Okay, now I know I'm rambling. I need to go try to process some of this, write down all the "pros and cons" of each option (transfusions versus early delivery) and pray.

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1011 Feb 11, 2014
momto3g3b

offline
Joined: 4/2004
Posts: 301
Location: just this side of crazy
<snip> Interestingly, MD won't show up on chromosome testing, and most genetic diseases don't - weird, huh, you'd think they would. <snip>

That IS interesting. I had no idea. I know the neurologist tested for Fragile X, Rett's & just general chromosomal abnormalities. I thought that meant she was fine, genetically-speaking. Thank you for the information. I didn't find your post offensive at all, and you didn't freak me out. As I said, my dh & Sarah's therapists and I already know there is something going on, so speculating on what it could be won't freak me out. Hearing a diagnosis of some sort might, though! LOL Again, thank you for the information. It will be interesting to see what the neuro has to say when we go back.

<snip> I guess if I saw this regression (when I was an EI therapist) I might have questions about a traumatic brain injury--either as an accident of some sort, or a stroke, or seizure activity <snip>

I understand this train of thought. We've already been asked if Sarah had an accident or anything in the past year, but she hasn't. The only head injury she's ever had was when she was 2.5 months old and her oldest sister accidentally dropped her. She had a CAT scan and there appeared to be no damage at that time, and she went on to develop normally for almost 2 years after that accident, so I don't think that incident is connected to her present regression. And there haven't been any accidents for Sarah other than your typical knee-scraping things since then.

Thanks for your response. I will give an update after she sees the neuro.

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1012 Feb 11, 2014
post #495 of 735
12/28/07 at 3:07am


momto3g3b


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Posts: 301
Location: just this side of crazy
I realized I haven't updated since June, 2004, and so much has changed since then.

Megan (16) has Tourette's.

Adam (15) has Tourette's, Asperger's, Marfan's, auditory processing disorder, anxiety disorder, learning difficulties.

Emily (8) has Asperger's, Chiari I, tethered cord.

David (6) has Autism, Chiari I (decompressed 2/05), tethered cord (released 8/05).

Sarah (6) has Chiari I (decompressed 7/04 & 2/05), tethered cord (released 2/05).

Isaac (4) has PDD-NOS.

Joshua (21 months) has Spina Bifida (spinal surgeries 3/06 & 4/07), Chiari I (decompressed 4/07 & 10/07), is primarily gtube-fed (since 8/07), wears UCB's to walk, is cathed every 4 hours during the day & is on Prevacid, Zofran, probiotics & Miralax daily.

I had thought I wanted another baby, but since Adam was just diagnosed with Marfan's (his was a random mutation, not directly inherited from dh or me), I'm thinking that I'm done. Having a "normal" child is obviously not in the cards for me.
Madi

Cape Coral, FL

#1013 Feb 11, 2014
This single post provides more insight about the “true” Kate than any of the gazillion posts she published on CB, forums, elsewhere.

This is the epitome of selfishness.

It would appear she did absolutely no research about international SN adoption, nor did she bother to use any common sense. It’s common sense that it will take time -- years -- to transition into a family, esp. for a delayed child who’s been neglected in an institution setting her entire life. You don’t get automatic trust and love from a child like this; you need to earn it and she wasn’t willing to do that.

This is horrific. Truly.

It also defies logic.

Did she really think she’d adopt these kids and have a fairytale-like scenario where the child loves you from the first moment and thanks you profusely for “rescuing” them??

And why did she keep Bethany?

Bethany also had a RAD diagnosis.

Why keep one and rehome the other?….Unless Bethany served some sort of means to an end. Who knows.
Nosepicker 14 wrote:
I was looking through some old emails and here is a direct quote from Kate about Hannah. I don't remember if it was a Facebook comment from Kate or a Caringbridge comment she made or what. I had copied it and sent it to a friend who also followed Kate, so that's why I had it.
"I am not keeping a child who rejects me & her older siblings, even if the reason she's doing it is because she is so broken from her own abuse and neglect that she can't allow herself to trust anyone else. I'm sorry for Hannah. I am. But this is not a challenge I'm "up" for. So if she gets officially diagnosed with RAD, then I will find a new family for her. I am sure there is a family out there who would be able to love Hannah despite her rejection of them & would have the financial means to get therapy for her at the level she needs. There is probably a couple whose marriage isn't hanging on by a thread who would be happy to take on Hannah & her challenges. She isn't irredeemable... I don't want to give the impression that I think she is, because I don't. I just feel like my life is so NOT at a place where I can be a decent parent to her, nor do I have any desire at this point to try."
AMA

Bothell, WA

#1014 Feb 11, 2014
Questions wrote:
<quoted text>
Interesting point.. but in a Case of this size and Magnitude, don't you think she might have a Lawyer , and that they might be assessing the nature of these posts.. and more so if they are being used as evidence the prosecutors might be collecting Items and don't want them on public display before the case goes to court. I tend to doubt that she would be on here out of compulsion.. for if she "couldn't help herself" as you say, then I'm sure if she were that compulsive that she would be posting daily to each of us here. OCD does not choose when and where it happens.. Just some thoughts on the matter
I definitely believe not only Kate is reading here but also Megan and Adam and Faith. JMHO but I don't believe Kate would pass up an opportunity to know what is being said about her and the older kids who helped her with all of this. This is a very telling site for Kate to collect info about what the detectives know and just how she is going to spin it to her favor. Also it helps the detectives and prosecutors find out more info by asking us to call in or even email if you aren't comfortable talking or letting this site know you are talking.Some people just don't want to be in the public eye but still want to help. I think that's been more than helpful to them and will continue on being helpful as more and more people who followed her find out about this site and come to tell what they know or have proof of.

How do 'we' know Kate, Adam, Faith and Megan aren't posting here?? WE don't. I don't think Kate would personally post to any ' one ' individual unless she knows for sure who they are and if they are friends or foe. IOW, she'll stay laying low unless someone pushes a hot button and sends her off on a tangent..But you better believe she's reading here many times a day..

The detectives or prosecutor have no reason to remove posts. In fact, if it weren't for this site they probably wouldn't have known and been given documented information by Kate and Adam, Megan and Faiths own hand and written words to further their case. This site isn't a threat to them
Watching

Grundy Center, IA

#1015 Feb 12, 2014
My thought process as to why she re-homed Hannah was that her medical needs were non-existent. She couldn't exploit something that was completely not there. Bethany had some issues that could be better or worse based on what she wanted from people. That's my thoughts on the issue.. I have thought that for quite a long time.. before any of this came to light. Thank goodness for Hannah that she was re-homed and also that the other children are doing well out of her care as well!

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1016 Feb 12, 2014
Watching,

I agree with all of what you said. Hannah was not sick enough.
Wow

San Francisco, CA

#1017 Feb 12, 2014
About Hannah, when it was said she was in a home separate from Josh, Bethany, and the older kids, does that mean a separate home from the people who were doing respite with her and had plans to adopt her? Or is it in the home of the respite, potentially adoptive parents?

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1018 Feb 12, 2014
She is in the respite home where Kate took her many months ago.
King

Dayton, OH

#1019 Feb 12, 2014
Thanks to momtomyboys, I also found Kate's posts on mothering.com . You can search for more using her userid: momto3g3b. I just can't figure out...how do you have time for that many kids and maintaining such an online presence...

momto3g3b
offline

Joined: 4/2004
Posts: 301
Location: just this side of crazy

And didja know that the reason I have a big family is because I am "going to keep having children until I get a normal one"? That's my mother's take on it. I DO have "normal" children ~ I have 2 who fit the NT criteria set forth by society, plus another 1 who is physically impaired, but not cognitively affected at all. And I had 5 children before the first one ever got a diagnosis of anything! So it's not like I kept having kids with problems and went, "Damn, another broken one. Okay, I'll have to try again!" I am offended & repulsed by my mom ever saying that!(And my family wonders why I have almost-zero contact with them anymore? DUH). And, for the record if anyone is wondering, no, I'm not having any more children. 7 is enough for me and I feel "done" now.

Since: Nov 13

Location hidden

#1020 Feb 12, 2014
King wrote:
Thanks to momtomyboys, I also found Kate's posts on mothering.com . You can search for more using her userid: momto3g3b. I just can't figure out...how do you have time for that many kids and maintaining such an online presence...
I think this site was her testing ground for how much attention she could get. She was throwing out lots of info about each of the kids and could easily see what got responses.

I had found post awhile ago (and can't remember where) with Kate doing lots of forecasting about Joshua's lifespan and possible health issues that she floated as things the doctors talked about based on her research and questions. At the time, Joshua was doing fairly well, crawling and moving. I kept thinking about why she would keep herself weighted in the downside when he was doing well. And you can see similar things in the mothering topic threads about vaccinations and the David and Sarah.

Each of her kids illnesses always had to have the extra twist so their case was more complex, more confounding. Poor Adam had to get a Marfan's dx because all his other dxs didn't make him compelling enough. No one asked about him.

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